De Sanguine Regis
by Normione
Summary: As Charlotte Noland begins to adapt to life in the 23rd century, new challenges arise that she never expected. With a new threat on the horizon and questions of loyalty raised, Charlie must decide where she stands as an outsider in her new universe. But when she meets someone from her own era, her world is drastically flipped upside down. Sequel to Cor Unum, Via Una
1. Chapter One: Here I am

**I'm BAAACCKKK! Hello all! I hope you all had a lovely Christmas and New Years. As promised (and highly requested) I have decided on a sequel! You can all squeal in delight now. C'mon, you can do better than that. . . . . . . Better . . . . **

**Now, a few words:**

**Firstly: If you haven't read my other story _Cor Unum, Via Una_ I highly recommend you do so, otherwise much of this story will be a bit confusing**

**Secondly: As like last time, I will try to post regularly, but because of different reasons, expect a post every other week. Sorry people, that's life for me right now.**

**Thirdly: I'm marking this as T, but M themes will be featured throughout; I will mark them accordingly**

**Finally: Also like last time, I'm keeping A/Ns down to minimum, although I might make an appearance or two to beg for reviews. They make me happy**

**Now that all that is out of the way, here you are! Welcome to _De Sanguine Regis_!**

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><p><em><strong>Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Star Trek as it is owned by Paramount and CBS Studios. Any reference outside of that canon that is familiar is purely coincidental. I only own Charlie Noland, and any elements unrelated to Star Trek and beyond. Please ask permission before using the character. Thanks!<strong>_

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><p><strong>Chapter One: Here I am<strong>

The gentle hum of the ship's engines echoed a soothing lullaby around the halls of the United Federation of Planet's flagship the _USS Enterprise_ as gamma shift kept their silent watch over the slumbering crew. Although most slept soundly in their beds, a nice shift to peaceful times since the battle with Klingons a month prior, one person laid tossing and turning, unable to find peaceful rest. Her brow furrowed as the nightmare grew worse, soft whimpers of distress escaping her lips and with a gasp, Charlotte Noland bolted up from the bed in shock, her breathing labored as she wildly searched the darkness for the green eyes that haunted her dreams. Her own dark gaze scrutinized every nook and cranny of the room, searching for a shadow out of place or the whispered breath of evil laughter that set the hair on the back of her neck to rise.

As the nightmare faded, and the eyes did not reappear, Charlie let her face fall into her hands as she breathed a deep sigh, slowing her heart rate back down to normal tempo. Slowly the tension eased from her shoulders and she glanced to her right, scrutinizing the slumbering man next to her, praying she had not woken him. Noticing the even movement as Jim Kirk, Captain of the _Enterprise_ slept, sprawled out and shirtless on his stomach while drooling slightly onto her pillow, Charlie couldn't help but smile. After the adventure they both went through when she was kidnapped by the man who brought her from 2013 Bristol, England to 2258 and into the hands of the _Enterprise's_ captain, the ability to just lay next to the man who unwittingly stole her heart was treasure she almost lost. Just thinking about the moment where she about returned to the 21st century sent a shiver of anxiety down her spine, driving the images of the nightmare to reappear in her imagination.

Realizing she probably was not going to go back to sleep anytime soon, Charlie carefully pulled her legs out from the covers, trying not to disturb Jim, and threw on her robe as she silently crept into the living room. She spent most nights in the Captain's quarters now, enjoying the time she was able to spend with Jim outside of the watchful eyes of the crew. Although she made sure she still had her own rooms in case she (or Jim) needed their space, Charlie found little reason to sleep in her own bed when she had grown use to the warm body pressed against her back and the strong arms that held her secure. Short of the man entering her dreams, Charlie was the happiest she had been in a very long time.

Plopping down onto the couch with a sigh, Charlie picked up the PADD Jim had given her along with her 'ancient' notebook and set to reread the book on Starfleet history Commander Spock had provided her. Since deciding to remain in the 23rd century, Charlie was beginning her crash course in two hundred years' worth of history, science and math to prepare her for life in her new universe. The entire Bridge Crew had graciously opted to help her acclimate to the 23rd century and teach her everything she needed to know before trying her hands at the Academy. Jim wasn't yet aware that Charlie was seriously considering joining Starfleet, but it felt like the right course and it would mean that she could live and work on the _Enterprise_. She would be able to remain with those where fast becoming her new family, and leave her mark in a way she never imagined.

So to assist, Spock had taken on the challenge of being her main tutor, instructing her on advanced calculus, physics, history, and Federation protocol, while the others supplemented where they could. Scotty was giving her an introduction to engineering as well as enhancing her physics course with practical applications. Chekov was teaching her weapons controls and different techniques of space combat. McCoy was her chemistry and research teacher, having her work on some of his less complicated experiments in Sickbay in her free time. Uhura was her cultural and language coach, educating her on all the different alien species she could meet in the future as well as offering to teach her a language of her choice. The communications officer, knowing of Charlie's recent history, was surprised when she chose to have Uhura teach her Klingon, not wanting to be placed in a similar situation she had found herself a few weeks before.

Finally, Sulu and Charlie would spar with each other twice a week, both having a background in competitive fencing. Although Sulu's style was definitely different from the more formal version Charlie had learned, she was catching on quickly and the bouts were fast becoming ship wide events to watch. At the moment, Sulu was two bouts up on her, but Charlie had been researching some new techniques and going over her old exercises, finding a few 'out dated' maneuvers she knew would throw off the helmsman.

Last but not least, Jim and she would spend their evenings and weekends playing chess, going over different battle strategies, and trying to best one another any way they could. As usual, Jim would cheat using his charm and charisma that appeared to be inherent in him, but Charlie didn't mind. She was able to win enough to sate her competitive nature, and Jim made sure to make it up to her in other ways when he did cheat.

A blush stained Charlie's cheeks as she thought about their growing emotional and physical relationship. While she wasn't a novice to men's attentions before she became involved with the captain; his attentions, skills, and the deep attachment the pair had for each other created a passion Charlie had only ever read about. Just thinking about the beginning of the night spread warmth across her belly and a silly smile to pull unconsciously at her lips.

"What are you doing up?" a groggy voice asked.

Charlie jumped startled, and glanced over her shoulder to see Jim leaning against the frame of the doorway to the bedroom, his hair mussed and his own robe hanging open. A yawn escaped as he reached a hand up to cover his mouth and Charlie guilty noticed he bags under his eyes.

"I couldn't sleep," she shrugged, turning back around to reread the same line she already read four times in the last five minutes. "Go back to bed, I'll be in later. I just need to review a few things before Spock's test tomorrow."

"Mmmm," Jim mumbled, shuffling further into the room and throwing himself face down on the couch, burrowing his head onto her lap.

"Jim," Charlie giggled. "I didn't mean on me."

"But you're comfy."

"Are you calling me fat?" she teased, glancing down into the glaring, blue eyes of the captain.

"That's not what I meant, and you know it," he grumbled.

"I know," she smiled, brushing the hair away from his forehead and smoothing down his wild hair. "But it was just too easy."

"Don't make me say what I'm thinking," he added with a smirk. Charlie lightly smacked his shoulder, glaring down at him. Slowly he sat up with a chuckle, rubbing his eyes and becoming more awake. "Come back to bed," he said huskily, leaning forward to run his lips down her neck and causing goosebumps to rise on her flesh. "You've already read, reread, and then reread that for Spock's test. Now it's time for sleep, or we could find another way to waste these hours before alpha shift."

Charlie tried to scoot away, goosebumps rising on her flesh. "But there's still so much I don't know! I haven't even begun covering 22nd century history, and –"

"You're not going to learn it all in one night," Jim interrupted, placing both of his hands on either side of her face to gain her attention. Only in doing so did he notice the black circles under her eyes, and the tight lines of tension in her face. A lingering fear was hiding under her visage, and only because of the lateness of the night coupled with the lack of sleep that it final showed through for him to see. "What's wrong?" he asked quietly, his gaze searching for the answer in her eyes.

"Wrong?" she questioned back innocently. "Why would anything be wrong?"

"Well other than the fact it's," he reached over and checked the chronometer on the shelf, "04:11 in the morning and you're out here studying for something I know you have covered."

"Just a bit of light reading—" she tried.

"It's the nightmares again, isn't it?"

Charlie snapped her mouth closed, and glanced away, knowing the look in her eye would give away the answer to Jim's penetrating stare. "I'm fine, Jim," she muttered, pulling her notebook back onto her lap.

"Uh huh, because that's convincing."

"Well it should be because it's the truth," she snapped, glaring at the captain above her research before turning her attention back to her PADD.

"Charlie," Jim groaned exasperated. Reaching forward, he plucked both the PADD and her notebook out of her hands and set them on the table behind him, leaving Charlie no choice but to reach _through_ him if she wanted her work back. "When are you going to admit you need help? This is the third time this week you've woken up because of those dreams."

_More like fifth_, she thought to herself, but didn't dare mutter the truth aloud. "Jim, they're just dreams. They can't hurt me and they'll go away on their own."

"It still might be smart to just talk to Bones—"

"I'm not talking to anyone because there's nothing to talk about!" she barked, standing up. She tried to reach around the stubborn man for her work when suddenly his arms reached out to snake around her body, pulling her onto his lap with an annoyed gasp. "Jim!"

"Well if you don't want to talk you can just listen then," he said as she tried to wiggle out of his embrace. With a defeated sigh, she relaxed her muscles, but continued to glare at the man who held her. "I'm worried about you. You're not sleeping, you're pushing yourself to learn everything as fast as possible, and you aren't dealing with what happened with Sagan. And I'm not the only one who's noticed."

"Really?" she muttered sarcastically.

"Yes, really. Everyone's concerned about you, Bones especially. You somehow weaseled your way into my crew's hearts, just as you weaseled into mine." Charlie's gaze relented as she saw the sincerity of Jim's concern. "I love you, Charlie. It's my job to make sure you're safe."

"But how can you protect me from my own mind?" she whispered.

"I don't know," he admitted, pulling her down so their foreheads touched. "But you have to let me in so we can figure it out together. You're not the only one to go through a traumatic event before, and you won't be the last."

"I'm supposed to be stronger than this," she admitted.

"Charlie, if you were any stronger a photon torpedo couldn't blast you apart."

She sighed deeply, knowing that Jim was right that she should speak to McCoy about the events on the Boradis Station and what transpired on the Klingon vessel where she was held prisoner, but that would mean admitting her weakness. She wasn't able to defend herself, and the powerlessness she experienced was not something she ever wanted to remember. However, each time her dreams brought her back to the station, and the shadow with the green eyes those feelings returned.

"Maybe you're right," she agreed slowly.

"Of course I'm right, I'm the captain. I'm always right," Jim joked, pleased to watch a smile spread across Charlie's face as she rolled her eyes.

"Your ego is already suffocating me, don't kill everyone else on this tin can."

"Oh ha ha ha," Jim growled, his hands beginning to roam under Charlie's robe, causing her eyes to widen slightly as her breath caught. "I don't remember hearing you complain earlier," he whispered leaning forward to kiss just under her ear, her hands on his shoulders clenching into fists as they pulled at his navy blue robe. "Or yesterday," he added, switching to the other side as she moved her head to give him better access. "Or even—"

"Okay, okay I got it," she breathlessly cried. "Sheesh, you're gonna be a handful, aren't you?"

"And you're not?" Jim raised a brow.

"Never said I wasn't," Charlie grinned, leaning forward to capture Jim's lips with her own, running her tongue lightly across the bottom lip as she caught it between her teeth, a move she had quickly learned drove Jim wild. "Now are you gonna take me to bed, or do I have to do everything myself?"

"No ma'am," Jim growled, standing up with Charlie still him his arms. "Your wish is my command." As Jim carried her back into his bedroom, one lingering thought escaped his thoughts, one that even the arrogant captain didn't want to jinx. Could life get any better?

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><p>"So what's on the agenda for today, Mister Spock?" Kirk jovially shouted as he entered the Bridge, addressing a few other members of the crew before taking a seat in the captain's chair. Spinning around, Jim turned his attention to his First Officer who was occupying the back science station.<p>

"We have been ordered to complete a routine investigation of the Tellar System, and survey the planets there for a possible Cordian colony."

Jim began lightly swinging his chair as he listened to the details of the dull assignment. "Uh huh and how long you estimate the completion of this project?"

"I believe it should take us no more than 1.57 Terran weeks to finish all of the proper scans and procedures, Captain," Spock answered.

"Great," Jim sighed, reaching up to rub his tired eyes. "Alright, assemble the necessary teams together. Approximately how long until we reach the Tellar System, Mister Sulu?" he questioned as he swung the chair back around.

"Six hours and twenty-three minutes at warp three, Sir," the helmsman answered.

"Bump it to warp factor four and get us there in five, Lieutenant."

"Aye, Captain," he answered as he adjusted the parameters on his console.

"Well, if you need anything else, Commander," Jim grumbled, standing up with a stretch. "I'll be in my Ready Room."

"Aye, Captain," the Vulcan acknowledged with a nod as Jim headed off the bridge. He was really beginning to tire of the survey and reconnaissance missions HQ was throwing at him. Jim would have thought they would appear far more grateful after he was able to sabotage a Klingon plot to destroy the Federation using the very woman who now occupied much of Jim's attention and heart. Granted, since Charlie came onboard the _Enterprise_ life has rarely been calm, but with her now studying every waking moment and the growing list of traditional missions from Starfleet, Jim was beginning to feel restless.

"Good morning, Captain," Janice Rand, Jim's Yeoman announced as he sauntered into his office. Noticing the mountain of PADDs on his desk, Jim was barely able to suppress a groan of annoyance. The paper work and minute responsibilities of being a captain were definitely not explained in the recruitment speeches when he signed up.

With a sigh of resignation, Jim plopped into the chair behind his desk. "Morning, Janice. What is all this? I thought we got all of the requisition forms done last week."

"That was for A&A and the biology departments, Sir," Janice answered, as she added another stack to the growing pile. "These are the botanists, and stellar cartography."

Jim really did groan then, his head falling into his hands before he sat up with a flourish. "Okay, here's the deal. I want all requisition forms due at the beginning of the month, and if they aren't in, they don't get what they want. And I want inventories done at the end of the month. This is starting to get ridiculous. I'm pretty sure the botanists already had a delivery of these Andorian snapping amaryllis last time forms came up."

"And I think you denied it then too, Sir," Janice pointed out.

Jim sent Rand a quick glare, before he turned back to the forms. After a few hours of dedicated work, Uhura's voice echoed around the office.

"Bridge to Captain Kirk, you have an incoming message from Starfleet. It's marked classified."

"Thanks, Lieutenant. Patch through to my Ready Room."

"Aye, Sir."

"I'll see you in a bit then, Captain," Rand said as she stood, taking a few PADDs with her. Once the Yeoman was through the door, Jim initiated the feed, surprised when Admiral Pike's image materialized.

"Good morning, Captain," greeted the admiral.

"Admiral Pike, I didn't expect to hear from you," Jim said, dipping his head. "What with your new responsibilities and all, I figured the _Enterprise_ was down on your list of contacts."

"Nice try, Kirk," Pike said, a twinkle sparkling in his eyes. "So how are things?"

"Fine, Admiral," Jim answered, slouching back in his chair. "Same old, same old."

"Uh huh," Pike said, unimpressed. "Well, I read your reports on the Klingon attack of the Boradis system a couple weeks ago. Interesting stuff coming out of that."

"Nothing we couldn't handle, Sir," Kirk brushed off.

"Oh, handling it was never doubted on my end, Son. But the individuals Dr. Sagan used to get the Klingon's to join his crusade. They were from the early 2000s?"

"As I'm sure you read in the report, that is correct, Admiral," Kirk said, his instincts beginning to pick up something. "And that is where we were able to return them, although it cost the last of the Red Matter Ambassador Spock brought with him in the Nero incident."

"But not all of them returned, did they?" Pike pressed.

A muscle twitched in Jim's jaw, his irritation and worry beginning to manifest. Sitting forward he said, "As you could see in the reports, Admiral Pike, there was a malfunction of the transporter—"

"Jim, it's alright," Pike interrupted with a soothing smile. "I'm not calling to bust you on the fact that Miss Noland remained in the 23rd century."

"How did you—"

"You aren't the only one who submits reports at the end of a mission, Jim. Several other members of your crew also gave their de-briefs, as they would with larger incidents like this last Klingon encounter."

Jim sat back again, his muscles relaxing as his brain began to work overtime. "Why now?"

"Pardon?" Pike queried.

"Uhura said this channel is secured for classified information. Since you're questioning me on something that happened over a month ago, it must mean Starfleet needs something else from us. So, why now? What changed?"

Pike stared at Jim for a moment before he smiled. "I was wondering how long it was going to take you to get the point. The _Enterprise_ has been ordered back to Earth for a more detailed debriefing, per Admiral Marcus's request."

"Sir?" Jim said confused.

"That's all I know, Jim. Apparently there's something Marcus is interested in finding out about the Sagan Incident."

Jim paused for a moment, trying to figure out why Marcus would recall his ship. "What could that be, Sir? I was very detailed in my report to Headquarters."

"I haven't been briefed myself, Captain. But I wouldn't be too worried. The _Enterprise _is scheduled for some upgrades anyway, so you can kill two birds with one stone."

"When are we to return, Admiral?"

"As soon as you are able."

Jim nodded, partially relieved not to have to deal with another boring cartography mission, but also concerned that the _Enterprise_ was being recalled. "Then I'll have my helmsman turn her around then."

"Excellent," Pike smiled. "I look forward to seeing you when you're back on terra firma, and I am especially interested in meeting Miss Noland. From what I understand she's been good for you."

For the first time since the conversation started, Jim returned Pike's expression, his gaze softening as he thought of Charlie. "Yes, she has, Admiral Pike. We've been good for each other."

"I'm glad to hear it, Son. I'll see you when you're back on Earth. Pike out."

Jim turned off his console, and while he appeared calm to the casual observer, his mind was running a million miles a minute. There was something not right about being recalled to Earth, but for the life of him, he couldn't figure out why.

"I guess I'll just have to wait till we get there," he said aloud before ordering Sulu to make a direct course to home.

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	2. Chapter Two: I Will Always Return

Okay, I couldn't help myself. Enjoy!

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><p><strong>Chapter Two: I Will Always Return<strong>

"What do you mean we're going back to Earth?" Charlie's fork was halfway to her mouth as she and Jim shared their customary dinner in the Mess. He had just finished telling her of his call with Pike, and the immediate summons of the ship and her crew.

"The _Enterprise_ has been ordered for a further debriefing at Starfleet Headquarters," he said nonchalantly, taking a bite of his own meal. "It's not unusual, and we have to do a few upgrades on the warp core anyway." He shrugged and continued on with his meal

Charlie sat back, her brow furrowed. "Why now? It's been over a month since you sent your reports, right?"

"I'm not sure. I think it's strange too that they've waited this long, but Admiral Pike has assured me that everything should be fine."

"And you trust this Admiral Pike? I know you and the Admiralty have some issues."

Jim grinned and rolled his eyes. "I wouldn't necessarily call it 'issues' just a difference of opinions."

"Oh, that's what they're calling it these days," she teased. "Will I have to do anything?" she added as she picked at her plate.

"I doubt it, you aren't a member of Starfleet," Jim pointed out. "I'm just looking at this as a nice long shore leave for the crew, and for us. Just think, you and me with nothing to do for hours on end," he added suggestively.

Charlie laughed, her fingers relaxing from around her water glass. If there was something to be worried about, she was sure he would warn her. "That sounds almost too good to be true."

Jim smiled, his eyes sparkling in a way that Charlie immediately read as the love they shared.

"I'm curious has to how Earth looks anyway," she admitted. "I wonder how things have changed since I was last home."

"I don't think it's going to be like anything you left behind."

"Oh I know it won't," Charlie agreed, practically scrapping the finish off the plate as she tried to remove every last bit of chocolate icing that had been on her cake. "Doesn't mean I can't be curious. I wonder what the Headquarters are like, and how San Francisco is different."

"When was the last time you were in San Francisco?"

"Not since I was fifteen," she answered, dropping her spoon and leaning back with a satisfied sigh. "My older cousin was stationed at Travis Air Force base, about twenty miles outside the city, so we visited San Fran when he got married."

"I have a feeling you're going to be surprised."

"I have a feeling I'm going to be very surprised," Charlie agreed with a grin. "But you'll be there, and the rest of the crew. You guys can give me a tour."

"Tour of what?" McCoy asked just as he plopped his plate down in-between Charlie and Jim.

"Bones! I thought you couldn't make it to dinner," Jim said, moving his tray to make room.

McCoy sent Jim a withering stare before grumpily snapping out his napkin and beginning to eat. "Yea, tell that to some of my pushy staff who insist that the CMO should set an example that getting three square meals a day promotes better health, or some other nonsense."

"Let me guess, the experiment didn't go as planned?" Charlie interjected with a knowing smirk, McCoy equaling his quelling glare in her direction.

"Spitfire, now is not the time to be pushing my buttons," he said, using his potato-covered fork as emphasis. "Now, what tour were y'all talkin' about?"

"Jim was just telling me, apparently we are headed back to Earth," Charlie remarked, her arms crossed on the table. McCoy's brows rose in surprise, his stunned gaze turning to the Captain's.

"Is this true?" he asked.

"Yea, it is," Jim answered. "I got the call from Pike this afternoon. We're already en route and should be there day after tomorrow."

"And you were going to inform us when exactly?" McCoy growled. "I've experiments Jim. Important ones. One's that need time and space, and—"

"Okay settle down there killer," Charlie said with a roll of her eyes. "A, I've been helping you out with those 'experiments' and they don't take near the time and energy you think they do. You're just a perfectionist with annoyingly dips into OCD and B," Charlie continued, holding her hand up to stop the spew of curse words she knew McCoy was just dying to say. "This is a time of rest, relaxation and going home to see your family. Just be happy you still have one."

Both Jim and McCoy were stunned into silence, surprised by the venom of her last statement.

"Charlie, I had no idea—" Jim began but was quickly interrupted buy the woman.

"Jim, it's fine." She pulled back the random surge of anger that had randomly spiked. "Jesus," she breathed, her head falling into her hands, her fingers lacing through her dark hair before she brought her head back up. "I'm sorry, McCoy, that was out of line."

"It's alright, Spitfire," McCoy allowed, scrutinizing the brunette and noticing the dark circles under her eyes. "You're right; I should look forward to seeing my family, especially my daughter. But you're wrong about one thing. You have a family. You have Jim, me, and all of us here on the _Enterprise_, and if you forget it again I won't hesitate to hypospray you into the next century."

"Thanks, Doc."

"I told you," Jim said to Charlie's eye roll.

"Enjoy that, Charming, because it's not going to happen often," Charlie grinned, standing. "I'll catch you two later. I need to see a Vulcan about a test."

The men both said their good-byes and watched the woman leave the mess to take her latest exam.

"She's not doing too, well, is she?" McCoy remarked as he dove back into his dinner, too stubborn to admit his nurse team was right.

Jim, his gaze still trained on the door, sighed and leaned back against the chair. "No, Bones, she's not, but she won't talk about it."

"Well if it's one thing I learned about that little lady, kid, she's not going to do anything she doesn't want to."

"You're telling me, Bones," Jim scoffed. "And who knows why, but I love her for it."

"That's because, Jim, you're a sucker for pain."

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><p>Two days after receiving the order from Admiral Pike, the <em>Enterprise<em> slowly pulled into Starbase One orbiting above Earth, its movements unhurried and precise as the docking clamps attached to the mooring ports on the starship's hull. Most of the crew was filled with excitement, the unexpected shore leave and opportunity to visit loved ones and friends was a welcomed gift. The talk all around the ship centered on people's plans, and what they were going to do for the two weeks off while the ship underwent the necessary upgrades in dry-dock. While a select few decided to remain onboard as skeleton crew, many of these members of other planets and colonies from around the Federation, the vast majority were receiving a well-deserved R&R.

The only one not excited for the trip to Earth was Charlie, who despite loving her home planet, and fully believing her choice to remain in the 23rd century was the right one, couldn't stop the fear for the culture shock she knew she was going to experience. This trip was not like returning home after a long absence, knowing things would be different but the overwhelming sense of familiarity keeping the disjuncture of the new at bay. Instead, everything would be different, without that familiarity to ground her as she explored the unknown. In many ways, seeing Earth as it had developed would solidify forever that Charlie was never going home.

Until her outburst at McCoy, Charlie really hadn't thought that she was homesick for her family. The attention she got from Jim, and the support of the crew kept the demons at bay. After all, she never had the best relationship with her father, and her mother, while a commanding force in the intelligence sector of the Air Force, never seemed to understand her oldest daughter. However, as the weeks had gone on, Charlie was beginning to miss the small comforts of home; the weekly chats with her sister gossiping over the latest scandal at the academy, or her brother's incessant attempts to beat her in Words with Friends. She missed going out for a coffee or girls night in with Kate and Philippa. These were small things that Charlie took for granted, but now that they were gone she found she missed them.

Jim had tried to talk to Charlie, and while it took some convincing for her to speak about her homesickness, she found that Jim was more than understanding. In fact he was waiting for it to happen, and was honestly surprised it took so long. Although she never shed a tear over the loss of her home, Jim still held her a bit tighter that night.

However, that didn't stop the dragons from flying round her stomach as she waited for him to return to his quarters after setting up the crew who would be staying onboard, as well as finalizing everything he needed before his de-brief in the morning. Her and Jim, along with Sulu, McCoy, Uhura, and Spock would take a shuttlecraft down to Starfleet while Scotty and Chekov remained to oversee the upgrades.

Finally, after several hours of nervousness, Jim sauntered back to his rooms. As they sat down in their seats, waiting while Sulu went over the checklist with Spock who was acting as co-pilot, Charlie couldn't stop her legs from bouncing up and down as she stared out the shuttle's small window. Suddenly a warm hand landed on her knee, gently stilling her movements. Charlie turned to see Jim smiling at her.

"Relax," he soothed. "Everything is going to be fine. I know it's going to be different, but I think you're going to love it."

Charlie tried to smile back, and took a deep breath to calm herself. "I know, but it's still nerve-racking. I mean, I'm probably going to stick out like a sore thumb."

"You do that already," Jim teased, earning a stern glare from her.

"Don't worry, Charlie," Uhura assured, sitting forward from her seat behind Jim and Charlie. "We'll go shopping. That's a cure for almost everything."

McCoy snorted next to the communications officer, to which her response was a sharp jab to the ribs.

Charlie grinned in response and replied, "You know, I think my grandmother would say the exact same thing."

"Wise woman," Jim smirked, earning a smile from Charlie and McCoy to roll his eyes.

Everyone sat back and fastened their seatbelts as Sulu's voice echoed around the small room, informing them of takeoff, and with her face practically glued to the widow, Charlie watched as the helmsman expertly navigated the shuttle out of the _Enterprise_ and into open space. Her eyes wide with wonder, Charlie watched as slowly, Earth came into view.

The sight of the blue planet with its puffy white clouds and small halo of atmosphere brought tears into the woman's amber eyes, one she had only dreamed of seeing but never thinking she would get the chance. She gripped Jim's hand almost painfully, and while he was beginning to lose the feeling in his fingers, the wonderment and joy on Charlie's face as she observed the surface of Earth move closer was worth the pain. She was almost childlike as she gazed out the window, sitting up in her seat as far as could and pressing her forehead to the glass as she tried to see everything she possibly could. As they passed through the atmosphere and the customary heat from the friction caused the metal to glow, Charlie gave out a gasp of surprise followed but the sound of awe as the light died away and Earth came back into view.

"Jim! Jim, look!" she exclaimed, tugging on his sleeve. "It's beautiful."

Jim leaned over, watching as the California coast slowly roast up under the shuttle as Sulu deftly maneuvered the craft toward the docks at Starfleet. Jim glanced over and couldn't help but smile at the glow radiating off of Charlie. Her eyes were sparkling like jeweled amber, and her smile was wide and toothy.

"Yes, you are," he said, repressing his smirk when he saw a blush rise on her cheeks, even as she rolled her eyes.

"Cheesy, Jim. Really cheesy," she said as they sat back and prepared for landing.

"I thought you told me you like cheesy?" he asked with a grin.

"There's cheesy, and then there's _cheesy_, and you, Sir, crossed that line."

Jim stared at Charlie confusedly as McCoy snorted behind him. "Don't try to figure it out, Kid," the doctor said as Charlie and Uhura shared knowing smirks. "Women like to create tricks and traps, and just when you think you have it figured out, they switch it on you."

"Well that's just sexist, McCoy," Charlie admonished with a grin. "Almost three hundred years later, and you're still saying women are tricksters."

"Show me a woman who doesn't pull the 'does this make look fat?' card, knowing full well there is no way a man can answer that without getting into trouble, and I'll rescind my comment," he barked as he unbuckled his seat belt, and stood now that the shuttle had landed.

Unbuckling her own restraint and standing, Charlie's heart was beating quickly in anticipation of what she would find once she stepped back onto solid ground two hundred years in the future. She grabbed Jim's hand as they exited the craft, and he gave her a gentle squeeze of encouragement as they entered into the hanger bay. Dodging and weaving around hurrying personnel, the group from the _Enterprise_ made their way from the hanger into the bright sunlight of Starfleet Headquarters.

Charlie stopped mid-step, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open as she looked up at all the skyscrapers, flying cars, and overall changed world she now found herself in.

"Holy crap," she said, continuing to walk as Jim tugged on her hand. "That's a few skyscrapers."

"I thought you had them in your time too?" Jim asked bewildered.

"Yes, but not this tall, and not this many," she answered, pointing toward the skyline. "San Francisco had maybe twenty at most the last time I was here. Now, it looks like two hundred. Is your apartment in one of those?"

"All of ours are," Jim said. "Starfleet provides housing for officers on their home planets. Our building is just outside the Academy's campus and next to Headquarters."

After ten minutes of walking, the crew came to the junction where they split, each group heading to their own respected building to relax before the de-briefing began the next day. Charlie waved good-bye and followed Jim into the tall, glass-covered structure separate from everyone else. Quickly the lift brought them up to the twentieth floor, and before Charlie blink, Jim lead her into his apartment.

She stood in the doorway, stunned, his view over the Starfleet facilities and into San Francisco bay was one of the most spectacular views she had ever seen. The light of the sun reflected off the glass of the other buildings, illuminating the sharp furniture through the asymmetrical windows. In the center, grey couches created an inviting sitting area with a large screen hanging above the fireplace. Behind the couches, a kitchen in white quartz and cold steel was practically untouched, glistening in the warm sunlight that streamed in.

"It's not much, but it's home," Jim said as he scratched the back of his head.. Sure, he has had plenty of women in his place before, but this was the first time he'd be _living_ with one, and while he was used to it back on the ship, being on Earth made it different. It made it much more solid and committed. "Here, let me to take your bag to my . . . I mean our room," he smiled awkwardly.

"Okay," Charlie said slowly, releasing her bag and watching as Jim disappeared down the hallway. Not knowing what else to do, and suddenly feeling uncomfortable, she shuffled to the windows, wanting a better look at her new home world. It was insane how the future Earth looked like hers, only magnified. She could see the traditional train cars of her time shuffling along the road below her, while above those different makes and models of cars _flew_ to their destinations. Men, women, and aliens of varying species roamed below her, and Charlie noted large groups of individuals dressed all in red, and figured those must be the cadets at the academy.

She had noticed the clothing of those around her as they had walked to Jim's apartment, and Charlie felt slightly out of place with her use of bright colored blouses and denim trousers. Since there were replicators, she was able to complete her wardrobe based off her previous style from the 21st century. Noticing the others, especially the women, she was reevaluating her clothing choices and seriously considering taking Uhura up on her offer to go shopping.

"So what do you think?" Jim asked, coming back into the living room, noticing Charlie standing off to the side. She hadn't removed her jacket, and still wore the black, knee-high boots she had come to Nimbus III in.

"What do I think about what?" she said, turning around to lean back against the window, crossing her arms. "Your place or outside?"

"Both," he shrugged, walking over to the fridge, and upon finding nothing inside closed the door with another sigh. "Sorry, forgot to have someone restock before we came back."

Charlie smiled, shaking her head. "I guess it doesn't matter the century, some things never change," she mumbled. "It's nice, both your place and outside," she stated louder. "Although your apartment doesn't really looked that lived in."

"That's because it's not," Jim said, leaning against the kitchen island. "I think I've spent a total of a month here. My home is the _Enterprise. _ Always has been."

"And always will be, huh?"

Jim grinned, "something like that." He shoved himself off the island and sauntered over to Charlie, wrapping his arms around her shoulders as he brought her in for a kiss.

"You know, we have this whole place to ourselves, and nothing to do until tomorrow," he whispered, pulling her against him, his arms wrapping around her.

"Whatever are we going to do with ourselves?" she teased, running her hands up and down his chest, fisting her fingers into his uniform.

"Well I was thinking—" Suddenly, Jim's communicator started ringing, interrupting his sentence. With a sigh, he rested his forehead against hers for a moment before pulling back and answering, mouthing a quick, "sorry."

With a shrug and acknowledging nod, Charlie turned to head to bedroom to change when she heard Jim say, "Tonight?! But we just got back!"

Curious, she spun on her heel and headed back to the living room as Jim ran his hand through his hair. "Yea, alright we'll be there. Yes. _We_. Put me down for plus one. Yea, I know, I'll explain it later. Bye."

"What was that about?" she asked, crossing her arms and leaning against the wall.

Jim took a deep breath, rubbing his eyes tiredly as he felt a headache beginning to build. "So scratch that thought at having nothing to do tonight," he sighed dropping his hand. "Apparently Starfleet is hosting a dinner for senior officers and since this is the first time in a while we've been back planetside, we're all expected to attend."

"We as in Bones, and Spock, and all them?"

"Oh hell yea, I'm not going to this stiff dinner without some form of support. Which is why you're coming with me," he pointed.

"Jim," she tried to argue only to have Jim interrupt.

"No, you are not getting out of this. If you're going to be with me for the long haul, which I feeling you might, you're going to have to get used to this. Besides," he added quietly, coming to stand in front of her, and gently rubbing her arms as she kept them crossed not looking at him. "I want everyone to know you're with me, that we're together. This is the first time I've ever had any form of relationship like this."

"Like how?" she questioned, turning her eyes back to his.

"One that I gladly want to show off."

"Cheese, so much cheese," she teased with a smile, rising up on her toes to lay her lips against his.

"The good kind?" Jim teased in return, pulling her closer.

"The very best," she answered, her arms going around his neck. "Now c'mon, Captain. I think we have a few hours to kill before this dinner, and I have some ideas to really help you prepare for tonight."

Jim's smiled widened as he followed behind Charlie while she led him to his bedroom. Maybe this dinner wouldn't be so bad after all. "I get you in a slinky dress tonight, right?"

Charlie's laugh was his only answer.


	3. Chapter Three: You Can't Take Me

**Ok, it's an addiction. I thought I could go two weeks. I can't. So whatever, enjoy :)**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Three: You Can't Take Me<strong>

"You sure I look alright?" Charlie asked for the fourth time, tugging at her long, figure-hugging dress.

After her and Jim had made sure the springs on his bed were adequate, she called Uhura and informed the communications officer of the dinner that night, and her lack of appropriate attire. Within twenty minutes, Uhura was in Jim's flat with several different dresses and pairs of shoes, helping Charlie find the right one appropriate for the dinner. In the end, she decided to borrow a navy blue, one shoulder gown that had asymmetrical patterns woven into the fabric. As the light hit it, it tended to reflect swirls and patterns similar to those of the cosmos, making it fitting for a Starfleet dinner.

"You look beautiful, Charlie," Jim grinned, tugging at his collar as they walked across the grounds of the headquarters campus.

"I still don't know why you're making me go," she complained, brushing her curled hair from her kohl-lined eyes as the wind from the bay blew across the grounds. "I know I have to get used to these dinners, but it's not as if I'm up-to-date on, oh, _anything_ of this century. I'm going to make a fool of myself, and in turn you."

Jim paused as they walked, waving the others to continue ahead. "Hey," he coaxed, pulling up Charlie's chin and forcing her to look into his eyes. "You're not going to make a fool of yourself, and definitely not me. I do that on my own," he grinned. "I'll be with you the whole night, and if for some reason I get pulled away, you'll have Bones, Sulu, and Uhura. Hell, even Spock will probably run interference. Maybe. Okay, maybe Spock's not the best choice, but you get what I'm saying."

"I just don't want to embarrass you," she admitted.

"You won't, I promise," he assured, wrapping her hand around his arm and restarting their trek to the main hall. "I know you're out of your element, but most of those who will be there already know of your situation. They'll understand. Those from the A&A department might even ambush you. Don't forget how old you are," he joked.

"Shut up," Charlie smirked, bumping her shoulder into Jim's.

Sooner than Charlie expected, they were at the steps leading into the massive conference center at Starfleet Headquarters, all manner of respectably dressed personnel filing in or waiting on the steps. As she gracefully ascended the marble staircase, one hand holding securely onto Jim's arms and the other holding her dress up, she couldn't help but find the irony of her situation. After running from the military life her family tried to force onto her, the number of Air Force balls and military galas she was required to attend testament to that, she was willingly walking into one of her own free will. If only her father could see her now.

Once through the glass door, Charlie noted the large number of Starfleet officers, all of varying ranks and in the regulatory dress blues. There were a few civilians among the crowd, most of them the wives or husbands of different admirals and captains, and while she was relieved not to be the only one, she detected the calculating eye sent towards her. Squaring her shoulders and standing taller, Charlie remembered all of the training in posture her mother dictated to her growing up. She may be a civilian, but she knew how to act like a soldier.

Those from the _Enterprise_ were standing off to the side around of the buffet tables, looking just as awkward and annoyed as Jim and her felt walking into the gala. Uhura caught sight of Charlie and waved, the brunette answering with one of her own before pointing them out to Jim. Nodding, they began to steer toward the group when an impossibly tall, dark skinned man stepped in front of the pair.

"Captain Kirk, I didn't expect to see you here this evening," he said, holding his hand out for Jim to shake.

"Admiral Barnett," Jim acknowledged. "Didn't expect to be here, but since the _Enterprise_ is scheduled for upgrades for the next few weeks, we decided to stop by."

"And who is this lovely lady," Barnett asked, turning his attention to Charlie. "No way she's here with you, Kirk."

Jim laughed as he introduced Charlie. "That she is, Sir. Admiral, this is Charlotte Noland. Charlie, this is Admiral Barnett, Head of Starfleet Academy."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Sir," Charlie smiled, shaking the man's hand.

"The pleasure's mine," Barnett said. "Noland, huh? Not the one from the Boradis System?"

Charlie held her smile, although Jim watched as she visibly frosted at the mention of the space station. "I see my reputation precedes me," she responded dropping his hand.

"More like your family's," he said. "I knew Dr. Spear; I was the one of the admirals to sponsor his doctorate. Intelligent scientist and one of the best physicists to come through the Academy. He will be missed."

"Indeed, sir. Although I didn't have the pleasure of meeting him myself, kin is still kin. But at least the man responsible will no longer be a cause of concern for you, Admiral," Charlie diplomatically replied, although the barest hint of steel undercoated her tone.

Knowing that further talk on the subject would only aggravate her more, Jim politely excused he and Charlie from Barnett, and continued to head to the others.

"You okay?" he asked as they walked.

"Yep! Fine," Charlie said with false cheerfulness.

"Charlie—"

"Not now, Jim," she said out the corner of her mouth when others came to greet the captain and learn who the woman was on his arm. This continued all through the cocktail hour and the following dinner. Jim did his best to introduce or explain who everyone was, but while Charlie's head was spinning with all the information thrown at her, years of going to the same events with her family prepared her to remember at least the ranks of those she met. Most of those he introduced her to, he seemed to have no qualms about, though there was a few that he wasn't entirely fond of. One was a man named Admiral Marcus, Head Admiral for all of Starfleet. Charlie only caught a brief glimpse of him as he wandered through the crowd, but other than the back of his head and his profile at dinner there wasn't much she could glean. When she asked Jim why he didn't like the man much, all he said was "just past history."

Finally, as the dinner concluded, Charlie was more than ready to head back to Jim's apartment and fall into his bed with the hope of sleeping for the next twenty-four hours. However, a man with greying brown hair, smiling blue eyes, and a cane stopped their progress toward the door just as they were about to leave.

"Jim," he greeted, shaking Kirk's hand.

"Admiral," Jim replied, his frost from the contact of the other admirals and captains melting instantly.

"And you must be Miss Noland," the admiral said turning his attention to a confused Charlie. "Jim's told me a lot about you."

"Uh, yea," she said slowly, shaking his offered hand. "I don't mean to be rude, but I'm afraid I don't know you."

The man smiled, the lines around his eyes crinkling merrily. "Christopher Pike. I'm the one who got this knucklehead to straighten up and join Starfleet. Then gave him my ship, although sometimes I question why."

Charlie couldn't help but grin as Jim cleared his throat gruffly and defend, "I think it's because my crew and I get the job done, Sir."

The man's smile remained as she sent a wink to Charlie. "That you do, Kirk, although your style remains to be seen. Speaking of, how's she holding up?"

"In dry dock now," Jim answered. "Scotty and Chekov remained on board to oversee the updates."

"Good to hear. Well, you are obviously on your way home, so I will see tomorrow morning for the debriefing, Captain. It was wonderful to meet you, Miss Noland," Pike said as Charlie took his hand again.

"Please, call me Charlie."

"Well Charlie, I don't know what you see in this one, but obviously he's done something right," Pike grinned. "If you're up for it, I would love for you both to join me for lunch tomorrow."

"I would love too, sir," Charlie smiled.

"We'll see you tomorrow then, Admiral," Jim added.

"Good. Well, until tomorrow." Pike smiled on last time before spotting Marcus and heading over to him as Jim and Charlie finally escaped into the night.

"Well that wasn't too bad," Charlie smirked.

Jim just huffed, and Charlie laughed, glancing up toward the full moon casting its cools light on the grounds. She breathed in the salty air, and for the first time since being kidnapped, calmness overcame the woman and she grinned, staring up the cloudless night with joy.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Jim Kirk sauntered into the briefing room at Starfleet, expecting a rather normal, if not long, arduous, and probably very boring session with the board of elite admirals. His stiff, formal uniform was a bit restrictive, and he unconsciously pulled at his collar as the other senior members of his crew took their seats around the large black table in the generic conference room. Bones gave him a quick nod while Rand quickly shuffled to her place to his left.<p>

"Good morning, Captain," Spock greeted, pulling out the chair and taking a seat to Jim's right. "Did you enjoy the festivities last night? Lieutenant Uhura and I rather enjoyed our conversation with Admiral Jones over the colonization of the Benzites in the Nivoch system."

Jim just stared at his First officer a moment before shaking his head. "Yea, Spock. It was great."

"Please convey my apologies to Miss Noland that we were unable to provide 'cover protection' as the Lieutenant put it. I trust she also enjoyed her evening?"

"She's going to keep ordering you to call her Charlie, you know that, right?" Jim pointed out. "And I believe she did. At least, she didn't say anything against it."

Spock was about to continue the conversation, when the door to the conference room opened, admitting several admirals including Pike and Marcus. The crew all stood to attention until Admiral Marcus waved his hand, impatiently gesturing for them to sit.

"Good morning, everyone," the man said briskly as he took his seat, smoothing down the front of his uniform and tucking himself into the able. "Thank you for attending on short notice. I trust everyone has already reviewed their briefing packets?" Everyone nodded around the table, and a chorus of 'ayes' followed suit. "Great. The admirals and I have called this meeting to settle a few inquiries we have before the _Enterprise_ leaves space dock next week."

"Excuse me, Admiral," Pike spoke up. "For clarification, this is in regards to the incident in the Boradis system that occurred on Stardate 2259.05?"

"Yes, Admiral Pike, it is," Marcus answered.

"Admiral, if I may," Spock spoke up, gaining the attention of the room. "All information regarding the events surrounding Doctor Sagan and his attempted coercion of a civilian for use against the Federation were all expertly detailed in the reports sent back to Starfleet. I made sure of it myself."

"And they were very detailed and informative, Commander," Marcus spoke, nodding his head in Spock's direction. "However, I have some issues not addressed in those reports. I would like to know how the man was able to evade our scanners for so long, but my primary concern is why one of the members of Sagan's plot was able to remain behind on the flagship of the Federation without the proper cross-examination by professionals here at Starfleet."

"I'm afraid I don't follow, Sir," Jim spoke after a pause.

"Then let me spell it out for you, Son," Marcus responded gruffly. "The woman in question, this Charlotte Noland," he glanced down at his PADD before looking back into Jim's hard stare, "there is little to no information within our databases on her, and she is virtually an unknown entity. Hell, this woman isn't even from this century, and if your reports are to be believed, originates from one of the most destructive in Earth's history. She very well could have been in league with Dr. Sagan the entire time, and is now just waiting for the opportunity to attack."

"Sir, I don't mean to be rude but that's bullshit," Jim said, his fists clenched tight until his knuckles were white.

"Jim," Pike warned, sending Kirk a 'cool it' look.

The captain took a breath before he continued, glaring into the hard, green eyes of the Head of Starfleet. "Miss Noland asked for our assistance, she was very vocal in her defiance against Sagan, and she even assisted with the destruction of the Klingon warbird. If that doesn't spell out loyalty to the Federation, then quite frankly I don't know what does. And the fact that she did come from the 21st century makes her actions that much more important."

"Listen Kirk," Marcus growled, leaning casually back against his chair as if they were discussing the weather. "I understand you have developed a relationship with this person. Trust me it's obvious," he added when Jim opened his mouth. "And I have to commend you on the loyalty of your crew; none of them gave any indication of it in their reports, but I am still uneasy about a civilian with no real history in our universe having close contact to senior members of your crew. Especially after the events on the Boradis Space station."

"And who then, should she have contact with Admiral?" Jim grounded out. "She has no one here; no friends or family outside that of the _Enterprise_. We are her family now." Voices of agreement echoed around him.

"Poetic, Kirk," Marcus patronized. "But that still doesn't resolve the fact that she is a young, impressionable woman without any sense of familiarity; a woman who went through a dramatic kidnapping and rescue attempt without the proper training to handle it. Most of those seated here will never go through an experience like what she did, and we've all been through the survival classes at the Academy."

"Then what would you have me do, Sir?" Jim asked sarcastically. "She is within her rights to deny the aid of my CMO, and without being a member of Starfleet I cannot order her to attend sessions with him. All I can do is support which seems to be working fine I might add." Kirk risked at glanced at his First Officer, who, while stoic as ever in his seat, had one brow raised painfully to the ceiling and his lips were a hard line.

"What is your medical opinion, Doctor?" Marcus said, directing his question to McCoy. Jim could see apprehension cloud the doctor's visage as the scrutiny of those around turned to him.

McCoy swallowed, his eyes catching Jim's before he muttered, "Miss Noland is of sound mind and I have never detected anything other than confusion since she was brought to this century." Jim grinned, sending a nod of thanks toward his friend.

"However," the doctor added, wincing at Jim's acknowledgement. "She has in recent weeks exhibited signs of distress, and medically I believe she is suffering from the lasting effects of PTSD."

"Which I have been helping her deal with," Jim forcefully added.

Marcus shook his head, rubbing his eyes and with a sigh he said, "I really didn't want to have to do this, Son."

"Do what, Admiral?" Jim challenged, his heart beginning to race as the implications of Marcus's statements began to connect.

Marcus's green eyes flashed threateningly, and he directed, "By Starfleet order 3963, I am ordering you to hand over Miss Charlotte Noland for debriefing in response to the events in the Boradis system, effective immediately."

"What?!" Jim shouted jumping to his feet, both Bones and Spock following suit, ready to hold their captain back in case he took a leap across the table. "You can't do that! She has her own rights as a member of this Federation to deny aid if she wishes. You cannot hold her without probably cause!"

"But she isn't a member, is she?"

"She is now, the minute she chose to remain here. You can't take her away from the only family she has."

"Alright, Captain, how about this?" Marcus sneered, rising as well. "Until proof can be determined that Miss Noland was indeed a harmless bystander and victim of Doctor Sagan, she will be under Starfleet custody since she seems to be outside her own time. Once she proves herself a valuable member of the Federation community and deemed not a threat, she will be educated as a productive member of the 23rd century and released back into the general population."

Jim felt a panic rise in his chest, echoing the moment when Sagan had taken took a hold of Charlie's arm and disappeared from sight. He had just gotten her back, they were just learning to work as a couple and now Starfleet was tearing her from him without the consideration of what it would do to them.

"Sir, if you just let me—"

"Enough, Captain," Marcus snapped, interrupting Jim. "Now you have your orders, or do you want to be held for insubordination?"

"You can't take her. I won't allow it," Jim glared at the admiral, his voice firm even though his hands began to shake subtly.

The room stilled, a tense silence overtaking the conference table as those presently watched the admiral and captain with hesitant curiosity.

Marcus's eyes hardened, his mouth pursing into a strong, firm line of displeasure. Turning to the lieutenant commander who was serving as the minutes recorder for the meeting, Marcus ordered, "please take note that Captain James Kirk will receive disciplinary actions for his insubordination. Were we wrong in giving you the _Enterprise_?"

"That is not what I mean, but—"

"Admiral, if I may?" Pike interjected, sending a pointed look to both McCoy and Spock who gently forced Jim back into his seat. "Obviously Kirk is concerned about your plan, although the way he expresses it remains to be seen. Miss Noland is in an interesting situation, one that we haven't handled in the history of Starfleet. If fact, there aren't many of us here who have experienced the turmoil of imprisonment, and having been brought into the future, she's at an even further disadvantage."

"Get to your point, Chris," Marcus ordered, returning to his seat.

"I understand the need for psychological evaluations of the woman, in fact I encourage it, however tearing her away from everything she has ever known in this universe could cause more harm than good," Pike said. "I request you appoint her under my guardianship, that way she has a familiar anchor while she undergoes the tests. She will be under high security with me, reducing the chances of issues holding her under custody and she will probably be more forthcoming in our questions. I am the closest one at this table to understand what she is going through at the moment."

Marcus considered the proposal a moment before nodding his head. "Fine," he agreed. "But I want twenty-four hour security on her, and if she steps one toe out of line, it will be on your head, Pike."

"I understand, Sir," Pike said.

"Good. Dismissed."

* * *

><p>As Charlie walked into the square where she promised to meet Jim and Admiral Pike for lunch, she couldn't stop a smile from spreading across her cheeks. For the first time in over a month, she got a decent night's sleep and all of her anxieties of the future were gently wafting away. Jim was especially attentive after the dinner, both of them enjoying the freedom of being off the ship and having true alone time. They spent hours talking, laughing and sharing stories of their respective childhoods, opening up their lives further to each other. Charlie wished the night could have continued for longer, but Jim had to be up early for the meeting with Starfleet, so she had grudgingly gone to bed when he did. Life had felt almost normal.<p>

Pulling up the collar of her black jacket against the rain and wind that was blanketing the city, she searched for the name of the restaurant she was meeting the men. While the majority of people were hurrying through the streets, trying to avoid the weather as much as possible, Charlie was enjoying the feeling of the fresh air on her face and the nip of the cold temperature, even if it was a bit wet. The last time she had been on Earth's surface, she had been living in England where rain and wind was a normal occurrence. Although she had to admit she never thought there'd come a day she'd _wish_ for rain, she was definitely not against it.

Finally spotting the sign, Charlie made her way through the crowd to the dark, wooden door of the old-fashioned pub Pike had recommended. Charlie figured he wanted to make her feel more at home, and walking into the darkened space, empty save for a small group in one corner with the pool tables and antique lightening, she did feel the first bits of familiarity with the place. A large plaque above the bar read _Kellar's since 2180_ with a list of all the food items served. There were a few things she didn't recognize, but most was the traditional bar food staples including burgers, wings, and sandwiches.

Unbuttoning her jacket and unwrapping her grey scarf from her neck, she stepped further into the room, the wooden planks beneath her feet, darkened with age and god-knows-what creaked under her weight. Heading around the bar, the pub continued further as old style, iron held glass panes let in the grey light from the stormy day, illuminating several tables and chairs. Sitting at one in the back corner were Pike and Jim, their heads bent in an intense discussion.

The admiral glanced up and caught sight of Charlie as she headed toward them, the heels of her boots clicking and echoing around the empty room. She saw him tap Jim on the elbow, nodding his head in her direction. Jim snapped his gaze around, his crystalline eyes locking with hers and for a moment, she read panic before the emotion was wiped so quickly she wondered if she imagined it. The next second a forced smile stretched across his face and he stood, leaning over to place a kiss on her cheek as she came to stand next to him, moving aside so she could slide into the chair next to his. She sent Pike a questioning look, the older man giving nothing away except a genuine smile and welcomed greeting.

"Did you have any trouble finding this place?" he asked, noting the closeness of Jim's body to hers, especially the draped arm across the back of her chair. "It's a bit off the beaten path and not a normal hangout for the cadets or really anyone from Starfleet."

"No problems really," she said, sliding out of her jacket, and resting her arms on the table. "The directions you gave were spot on, although I didn't mind a bit of wandering. There's just so much to see here, I feel like I need one lifetime just for this city."

"Trust me, it gets small really quick," Jim said, a hint of bitterness underlining his tone.

A waiter came and took their drinks, handing Charlie a menu that she could look over. "There aren't any prices on here," she noted confusedly, flipping through the menu.

"That's because we don't use money anymore," Pike explained. "Since we have the ability to replicate almost anything we choose, everything has lost its monetary value."

"That's impossible," Charlie scoffed, her eyes wide. "But Sagan said he was going to use the sale of the Red Matter research to buy his own planet," she remembered, turning to Jim. "How could he do that if you don't have any money?"

"We don't have any," Jim said. "But there are still others in the galaxy that do; he could have tried them."

"So you really don't have to pay for anything?" she tried again, glancing between both Pike and Jim.

"Nope," both men said together.

Shaking her head she admitted, "That's incredible. My world revolved around money, I just can't imagine not having it."

"You'll get used to it," Jim smiled, brushing a piece of hair off her face.

Their drinks arrived soon after and they placed their food orders, the waiter heading back into the kitchen and leaving the three alone.

"So how'd the meeting go?" Charlie questioned, sipping through a straw as an awkward silence grew. Jim stiffened next to her and she noted Pike's quick glance in his direction, both men visibly tensing. "What is it?" she probed, glancing between the men as her own adrenaline spiked by the tangible anxiety radiating from the captain sitting next to her. "Jim?"

"Nothing. It was fine," he shrugged nonchalantly, taking a sip of his drink and not looking the woman in the eye. Pike sent Jim a look that spelled 'really' as he also took a sip of his beer.

Raising her brow, unconvinced, Charlie urged, "So why did they need to see you? Why weren't the reports good enough?"

"It's not that the reports weren't good enough –"

"Then what?" she interrupted, her frustration growing at his evasiveness. She stared hard at Jim, and he could feel the fire of her amber glare. Turning to Pike, Charlie snapped, "Are you going to give me a straight answer?"

Just as Pike opened his mouth to tell Charlie the truth of the meeting, Jim barked, "They want something, alright?"

"There, was that so hard?" she replied sarcastically. "What do they want?"

Jim pursed his lips, shaking his head slowly. While he will be leaving her behind, Charlie will be the one to have to face Marcus and his interrogation squad.

Jim opened his mouth, then closed it again, growling internally that he couldn't tell her. Charlie noticed could see the internal struggle he was having, her confusion growing each second.

"While the admiralty has their reasons, Charlie," Pike began, gaining the attentions of the young woman. "I will say right now, I wasn't aware of what they were going to ask until I walked into that room this morning."

"Okay?"

"The admiralty, and specifically Admiral Marcus is requesting, well they want –"

"You," Jim interrupted with defeat, unwilling to look at Charlie. "They want you and have ordered me to hand you over to them."

Just then, the food arrived, a tense and uncomfortable silence followed as the server laid their plates in front of the trio, leaving just as quickly as he came once he was sure they were all set. Charlie just sat there, blinking at Jim as she tried to understand what he had just said.

"Me?" she voiced with bewilderment. "Why on Earth do they want me? I'm no one."

"You're hardly no one," Pike pointed out with a smile, squeezing out a large dollop of ketchup next to his fries.

"Still," she said. "I'm not someone of high diplomatic, or I don't know, strategic importance that the head of Starfleet should take an interest in me."

"They seem to think otherwise," Pike said.

"And what do you mean ordered?" Charlie asked, her attention turning back to Jim as he poked at his food, Charlie completely ignoring hers. "What do they want that they had to order you to 'hand me over'?"

Jim sighed as he leaned back against the chair. "Marcus is concerned that because you are not in Starfleet or a trained civilian for space exploration, that your connection to me and my crew might be suspect."

"Suspect for what!" she exploded.

"Because of the time from which you came, and how long you were with Sagan . . ." Jim trialed off.

"Does he think I was in league with the Klingons?! That I was helping Sagan?" she growled, her anger and fear peaking in a way it never had before.

"Jim and I know that isn't true," Pike spoke calmly, giving a nod of encouragement in Jim's direction. "I read the reports sent back to Starfleet. There are no indicators that you were involved the Doctor Sagan's plot. But it's Marcus's job to protect this organization, so he wants to make sure nothing is wrong with its flagship."

"But nothing is wrong," she practically whined. "Have I done something that would indicate I'm not trustworthy?"

"No, Charlie, no," Jim affirmed, taking her hand firmly. "You have done nothing, this is just precautionary. Before you know it, you'll be back with me and the _Enterprise_ and—"

"_Back_ on the _Enterprise_? Why am I _not_ going to be there? Am I not leaving with you next week?" she panicked.

"You'll be with me," Pike said firmly, attempting to calm the woman. "I have already arranged with Marcus that you will be under my guardianship and supervision."

"I am twenty-four years old, I don't need supervision," Charlie spat. "In fact, I'm more like two hundred and twenty-four, so I think I win in that category."

"I agree," Pike placated. "But like I said, Marcus is supposed to be cautious; it's in his job description. As long as you don't try to run away from Earth, or something else drastic," he shot a quick look to Kirk who shrugged innocently, "you won't have anything to worry about."

Taking several deep breaths, Charlie tried to calm herself down, her frustration causing tears to build in her eyes and she quickly glanced away. "I just don't understand. What do they expect me do? Why are they doing this to me? I thought I showed them that I wasn't a threat."

Jim gently brought her eyes back to his, warmth and strength radiating from his hardened blue gaze. "I promise you, here and now I will come back for you. You'll be gone a few weeks tops, but you will soon be back on the _Enterprise_ with me."

"And I will make sure you get back to him," Pike added. "Nothing will happen, and I'll coach you through the debriefing process. You have nothing to hide, and as long as you show that, Marcus will relent. I will take care of you."

Charlie sat there, wiping away her tears and saying nothing. _One night_, she thought. _I only had one night before my world decided to explode again._ Taking a breath, she said, "I hope you're right, Admiral Pike. For all our sakes." With a small smile at both men, she picked up a fry and began to eat, and whereas Jim and Pike's conversation turned toward her upcoming departure, Charlie lost herself in her head. _What am I going to go now?_

* * *

><p><strong>Reviews make the world go round :D<strong>


	4. Chapter Four: Get Off of My Back

**Chapter Four: Get Off of My Back**

The next morning, even though everything in her screamed to run as fast as possible, Charlie walked into Starfleet Headquarters flanked by Jim, McCoy and Spock. After their lunch with Pike, Charlie and Jim retired to their apartment where the other members of the crew waited for them. Charlie's head was still numb from the news that she would be under Starfleet custody for the foreseeable future, and even though Pike swore to take care of her while Jim was away, her fear was heightened by the thought of what they wanted.

She still couldn't understand why after a month of living on the _Enterprise,_ Marcus thought she posed a threat. It wasn't as if she had done anything to warrant such thinking, and the fact remained that she was the one who was kidnapped and subjected to the horrors onboard the Klingon ship, not Marcus. He couldn't possibly understand what she was dealing with, and to tear her away from the one thing that let her feel safe and secure was a big mistake on his part.

The others were just as shocked and confused as Charlie. McCoy was the most vehement opponent of leaving her behind, but even the surly doctor couldn't defy a direct order. They tried to assuage her of her fears, telling her that all she would have to do is undergo a few interviews, and possibly an even deeper medical examination than the one McCoy gave her that first week on the _Enterprise._ But no matter how confident they were, Charlie could barely stop the shaking of her hands or relax the knot of nerves in her stomach.

After everyone left, Jim turned to Charlie who had barely said a word since they entered the apartment.

"Are you okay?" he questioned gently.

Charlie closed her eyes, the tears she withheld the whole day rose like a spring tide. She tried vainly to swallow them again and croaked, "I'm trying to be."

Jim's anger peaked as he paced furiously around the room. "This isn't right," he growled, his fist slamming into the wall near the fireplace.

Running a hand under her nose, Charlie shrugged. "Yea well, what can you do? He gave you a direct order. You can't defy him. I know that better than most," she bitterly added.

"I don't know what to do, Charlie," he admitted with resignation as collapsed next to her on the couch. "I don't know how to fight this. I can't lose you again."

Charlie reached over and took his hand. "You're not going to lose me, Jim. I can promise you that." She took a breath, hardening her resolve and said, "I'll do what he wants, answer any questions he asks of me. I have nothing to hide, so I should have nothing to fear."

Jim grinned, reaching up to brush away a salty tear coursing down her red cheeks. "I don't know how I screw up like me ended up with such a wonderful woman like you."

"Even a blind squirrel finds a nut every once in a while," Charlie joked, leaning into his hand.

A deep chuckled erupted, Jim for once unprepared for her comeback. "Just promise me one thing?"

"Yea?"

"Give Marcus hell."

As she continued through the obscenely bright corridors in HQ, that last sentiment from Jim echoed through her head. Yes, she would answer Marcus's questions, but she was not going to make it easy for him. She was tired of other people deciding her fate and taking away the control she had for her own life. It was time she fought back in a way innate to her family; she would fight with the cleverness bred from a thousand years of military geniuses.

As soon as they reached Marcus's office, the woman leading the group formally dismissed the men. Turning toward them, Charlie gave an encouraging smile, masking her fear behind her bravado. Spock merely nodded at her expression whereas McCoy clutched her shoulder, giving her a reassuring squeeze of support before following the Vulcan down the corridor muttering furiously. Charlie saw Jim smirk when they heard "blasted bureaucratic nonsense" from the CMO. Rolling his eyes, Jim shared a knowing glance with Charlie before wrapping his arms around her shoulders and pulling her into him. His head dipped as he breathed in her scent, wanting to remember for as long as possible how she felt in his arms. Charlie also clutched at his back, the corded muscles under her finders stretching and flexing as Jim moved.

"Remember, I will always come back for you," he whispered.

Charlie pulled back and swallowed the lump in her throat. "I know you will. And I will be right here when you do."

With an annoyed cough, the officer who escorted the group gained the attention of the couple, glaring a warning to hurry it up. Charlie glanced over her shoulder, about to the give the woman a piece of her mind when Jim grabbed her head and crushed his lips to hers. Charlie was surprised for a moment before she relaxed, the welcomed tingles of warmth giving her heart courage. No matter what happened, she knew she would return to him and that gave to strength to face whatever was waiting for her in that room.

Slowly, the pair released their embrace. "I love you, Jim," Charlie whispered.

"I love you too," he answered. "Now go in there and raise hell. Make me proud."

With a nod of affirmation, Charlie backed away, turning on her heel to follow the ensign into the waiting room. With one last look around the door jam, Charlie gave Jim an encouraging smile before disappearing into the room. Jim let out a heavy sigh, his hands clenching and relaxing as every fiber of his being wished for her to run out that room and back into his arms. But after several minutes, Jim felt a hand on his shoulder, turning him around and guiding back into the daylight.

"Don't worry, Jim," McCoy said, his hand remaining on Jim's shoulder until they were clear of the building. "Charlie's a fighter. That Spitfire will show Marcus a thing or two and then she'll be back with us faster than a horse at the Kentucky Derby."

Jim grinned, rotating to acknowledge his friend. "Thanks, Bones. For everything."

"Hell, Kid, I love her too," McCoy said. "She's like that annoying younger sister I never had. Pike'll make sure she gets back to us."

Answering with a nod, Jim and McCoy continued on where they were to meet with the other members of the crew. Their own debriefs were not over and for the next few days, Jim would spend every waking hour being probed for his role in Sagan's plot. But the imagines of a brunette woman with eyes the color of damp earth disappearing around the corner would haunt him for the weeks to come.

* * *

><p>With a snap, the large metal door closed behind Charlie, leaving her in a sterile room with nothing but a hard metal table and several chairs. She was surprised how normal the room appeared, as if dropped from her own time of crazy cop shows. One wall did looked out of place though. She couldn't place what it was, it looked like a normal, plain support but it put Charlie on edge. If she had to, she'd bet that it was a new form of a two-way mirror.<p>

Glancing around the rest of the room, a petite blond woman sat at the table, her hair pulled back in a severe bun and her grey uniform pressed and starched to almost full rigidness. Her pale complexion combined with her hair washed out her features, and while her hazel eyes were pretty, the lines around them prematurely aged her. Charlie stood awkwardly, studying the woman in the same way she scrutinized her.

"Miss Noland, please have a seat," the woman said, gesturing to the chair opposite her.

Standing a second longer than was necessary, Charlie sauntered over to the chair, pulled it out with one hand then gracefully lowered herself onto it while never breaking eye contact. She smirked at Charlie's attention, breaking the contest first to type something into her PADD. The woman cleared her throat and brought her attention back to the brunette, continuing to stare as the silence dragged on past the point of awkwardness.

Charlie did her best not to shuffle, keeping her posture ramrod straight and her expression blank. She knew what the woman was doing; a technique her own father had used when he thought one of his children had misbehaved. Sometimes the silence was worse than the questions, causing the guilt to rise to the surface as they tried to fill the stillness with useless babble. While the trick had worked when she was younger, within ten minutes Charlie was bored of the whole endeavor, stifling a yawn with the back of her hand. The woman raised a brow, again typing something into her PADD.

Suddenly the door to the room burst open and Charlie glanced over as Admiral Marcus stepped in, stopping in the doorway to scrutinize the young woman. Across from her, the woman rose immediately when the door opened, leaving her seat vacant. Marcus continued to stare down Charlie, noting the defiance in her eyes and tension of her posture.

With a smirk of his own, he strolled over to the abandoned chair and took a seat as he smoothed down the front of his uniform. Flipping on the PADD he carried, he pressed a button when suddenly a translucent screen appeared between Charlie and Marcus, highlighted in blue and red as it casted a soft glow on both of their faces. Charlie was surprised to see her image centerfold and her personal information detailed to the left and right; the basic data such as her birth year and full name highlighted.

Clearing his throat, Marcus tucked into to the table and began, "Charlotte Elizabeth Noland, born April 15th Earth year 1989 at Mount Sinai Hospital, Manhattan. Daughter of former United States Air Force Lieutenant General Robert Alan Noland and Colonel Margaret Jean Noland (Riley), sister to Colonel Rachel Ann Noland-Greer, and former United States Army General Bryan Douglass Noland. Disappeared on March 23, 2013 in the United Kingdom, whereabouts unknown until the USS Enterprise came in contact on the uninhabited planet Nimbus III, Stardate 2258.92. This is you, correct?"

A snarky reply was just on the tip of her tongue, but Charlie held back, staring instead at the interesting spot on the wall behind Marcus's head. They couldn't make her talk if she didn't want to, and she was fairly confident that torture was outdated so she could gamble. As the minutes ticked by, Charlie noted a moderate level of frustration grow in Marcus's green eyes.

"We're not going to get very far, Miss Noland, unless you answer my questions," Marcus sighed. Again, he was met with silence. "You've got guts," he muttered, adjusting in his chair. "But this isn't some game. Lives could be at stake; not just yours, but those around you. You don't want to cause a problem for Captain Kirk do you?"

Her gaze finally snapped to his, hardening at the mention of Kirk. "He has nothing to do with this," she said sitting forward, the woman in the back diving into her PADD.

"So you do have a voice," Marcus remarked, his deep voice echoing around the room booming and authoritative. "That's good. I like to see how people respond under pressure."

She growled and crossed her arms protectively in front of her. Marcus laughed as he sat back, mirroring Charlie's pose.

"Maybe it would be higher if I knew why I was brought in here like some common criminal for doing nothing more than being born in the wrong time," she spat. "I know my rights. You cannot keep me here unless you charge me for something and then I want a lawyer. So if you just brought me in here to chat and test how I am under pressure, then I think you're barking up the wrong tree. If you'll excuse me," she made to stand, the metal chair scrapping against the tile floor.

"Sit down, Miss Noland," Marcus ordered, snapping to attention faster than she could.

"Then tell me what the hell is going on," she growled, leaning onto the table. "Why did you order me away from Jim? Why take me away from the Enterprise?"

The two stared each other down a moment; the only sounds heard were their heavily breathing and the clicking of the PADD in the corner.

"Sit. Down," Marcus ordered, even firmer than before. Slowly, Charlie lowered herself back onto the chair, her own curiosity unable to let her leave.

"I like your spunk, I'll give out that," he commented, retaking his chair. "That's a trait that seems to have been lost in my generation. People around here forgot what it's like to defend themselves against a well-armed adversary. They lead these comfortable lives with the protection of Starfleet, and from men like Captain Kirk. We came close with that Romulan a few years back, but you know what it's like, don't you? To be continually on edge, waiting for the next battle – the next conflict. You come from a whole world drowning in it."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said, her brows drawn down in confusion.

"I'm sure you don't," Marcus patronized. "A family like yours, you had all the protection and support you could ever need."

"A family like mine?" Charlie sneered. "What the hell do you know about my family other than what your little technical devices tell you?"

"I know a lot more than you're giving me credit for," Marcus said. "I knew the man who died protecting his research from the Klingons. In fact, Spear worked for me."

"Well of course he worked for you; he was Starfleet," she derided, trying desperately to ignore the woman in the corner typing furiously into her PADD, finding instead the thought of throwing something at her far more entertaining.

"Not the way you think, Miss Noland," he said, bringing her attention back. "But that's a classified subject for another day. Now that I have you open and talking, let's begin. You can confirm your birth date as April 15th 1989?"

"Why the hell are you doing this?" Charlie asked.

"Your birth date please."

"No, not until you tell me what is going on," she snapped, stabbing her finger on the table to emphasize.

"I'm afraid we're getting off topic."

"I know this game, Admiral," she added, force and strength laced through her words. "I used to live it. After all, just look at my family. So, why the hell is the head of Starfleet interested in me?"

"This isn't a game."

"Isn't it?" she challenged.

Marcus sighed as he rubbed the bridge between his eyes. "Birth date, Miss Noland. I won't ask again."

She sat a moment, drumming her fingers on the table as the silence lengthened again. "Alright, let's make a deal. I answer one of your questions, and then you answer one of mine."

"This isn't how this works."

"Then make it work."

Marcus smirked, nodding to himself. "Alright, fine. You answer one of mine, and I'll try to answer one of yours."

Charlie glared a moment, trying to see if she could negotiate further, but his rigidity told her she wasn't going to get further.

"Alright, fine. Yes, my birthday April 15th 1989, now answer my question. Why me?"

"You're special, Charlotte. Do you mind if I call you that? Or do you prefer Charlie?"

"I prefer Miss Noland," she snarled, the man setting her teeth on edge the same way her father did. "And how am I special, because I come from the 21st century? That's not that big of a deal, let me tell you."

"It's a hell of a big deal," he barked sitting forward, his hand reaching up brush away her information from the transparent screen. "The time you came from saw some of the most violent wars than in any other moment in history, and your family was at the center of it all."

Charlie sat back, trying to digest the information thrown at her. "Not really," she said slowly. "The ranks you named off for my parents and siblings, they all occurred after I left. I wasn't there for their promotions or to see what they did to earn them. I don't know what you're wanting—yes, my time had violence. But so did the times before me: the Romans, the Crusades, the Hundred Years War, American Revolution, the _French_, the Napoleonic Wars. That doesn't even take into account wars in China, Japan, or Africa. So to point me out as unique, I'm really not."

Marcus just sighed, his head dropping into his hand as he rubbed his eyes. "It wasn't just that. Your family was in the middle of all of those wars, weren't they? Key players," he implied, raising his chin to stare into her confused amber gaze.

"So? My family's military, have been for a while; big deal."

"And always seem to be on the winning side."

Charlie became even more confused. "We were lucky, I guess. Or just smart."

"Or maybe you had something going for you that others didn't. I mean the Eugenic Wars killed a lot of people, yet —"

"Wait, the what?" Charlie interrupted him. "Do you mean the holocaust?"

"No, not the holocaust," he spat. "I'm talking afterwards. The development of the augments, and following wars that marked them as war criminals."

"Not to be rude, but what the hell are you talking about?" Charlie asked. "I don't know what these augments are or about any wars with them. Are you sure you know which century I come from? What you're talking about sounds more like science fiction. I mean granted I am—" she quickly snapped her mouth shut, about to reveal something she swore she never would. It had taken some time to wrap her head around the fact that not only had she time travelled, but she had apparently jumped into the early version of a 1960s television show. But everything she had learned since she was brought to this universe was that while the names and some mannerisms of the characters were familiar, Nero had changed things dramatically. To speak of what she knew could cause more confusion and fear than she wanted, especially with Jim. That meant she wasn't about to blab that she knew more than she let on.

"You are what?" Marcus said, discerning her unsaid sentence.

Taking a deep breath, Charlie fixed a defiant expression on her face and affirmed, "Nothing."

"No," Marcus argued quickly. "You are about to say something else and then cut yourself off. Now what is it?"

"It's nothing, just a slip of the tongue."

"I doubt that."

"I don't really give a shit," Charlie snapped.

Marcus sighed again, his irritation growing with each passing moment. "Miss Noland, we can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way. The choice is up to you," he finished, his hands gesturing wide.

Charlie started drumming her fingers on the table as she stared the man down. "I am not a threat," she admitted with finality.

"No you aren't. Not yet."

"Not ever," she emphasized.

"Miss Noland," Marcus growled. "I am not a stupid man. I am not a patient man. I know the world from which you came, and the reputation your family has had through the centuries. You may have fooled the captain by batting your eyes, which from what I know isn't that difficult, but you can't fool me. My job is to protect the Federation and Starfleet from people like you."

"People like me?" Charlie cried desperately. "I'm nothing! I couldn't even protect myself again a man twice my age, nor did I take down an entire crew of Klingons! I don't know who's been feeding you erroneous information, but whatever you think I am, I'm not."

"Well, we have ways of judging that," Marcus resignedly said, standing up and not looking at her. "If you aren't going to cooperate, then I'm afraid we're going to do this the hard way. I'm offering you a chance to help me, Miss Noland."

Charlie started panicking then, the combination of her time with the Klingons and now the added stress of Marcus's accusation causing her heart to beat painfully and her head to become lightheaded. She couldn't breathe and the world felt like it was tunneling into itself.

"Please," she muttered, her wide eyes desperately seeking out his as he moved to walk away. "I don't know what you want me say."

"The truth."

"But I have," she cried, slamming her hands down on the table. "I was brought out of my time to this one because some manic wanted my DNA for something that didn't even work."

"And it's your blood that has me concerned," he growled, leaning over the table, through the projected screen and into her face. "Are you like them? Like him," he accused.

"Like who?" Charlie howled, tears of frustration building in her eyes. The desperation she felt was surfacing like a wave, bubbling over the surface of her control. She started to hyperventilate, her legs bouncing uncontrollably and her hands shaking as she tried to wrap her head around what the admiral was asking for. She glanced over to the woman in the corner for a help, but her stoicism and detachment from the interrogation left Charlie feeling helpless, hopeless, and powerless.

Just as Charlie was ready to break down, a voice from the doorway spoke, "Admiral, I think that's enough for today."

Charlie's head snapped up, her reddened amber eyes gazing a silhouetted Admiral Pike in the doorway to the room, leaning heavily on his cane. While there was a small smile on his face, there was steel in his eyes.

"Pike, what are you doing in here?" Admiral Marcus snapped, rising to his full height and getting out of Charlie's face. "This is an interrogation!"

"Interrogation for what, Sir?" he questioned, limping into the room and coming to stand behind Charlie. "As far as I am aware, this is an evaluation for Miss Noland's health and safety. She hasn't committed a crime, Admiral."

"I need answers from her."

"Well now I understand that, but how are you going to get what you need if you push Miss Noland to the point she can't tell you what you want?"

"If I push too hard, Dr. Greene will inform me," Marcus snapped, gesturing to the woman in the corner. The woman nodded her head at Pike, but gave no other comment.

"You granted my request that Charlie be placed under my custodianship," Pike injected firmly. "And as such I am saying you are going too far. I'm not sure what you are wanting of the girl, but you yourself said she has been through a trauma that many of us haven't faced before. Give her time to heal, to get the necessary help and then question her."

Marcus considered Pike a moment, and then glanced down to Charlie. In the time they had been speaking, she had gained control back over her emotions, but it was a fragile control at best. Somehow, that man had hit a nerve that triggered her anxiety attacks and forced her to relive the Klingon imprisonment over again. She was angry, which could cause her to say and do things that could get her into actual trouble, but knowing Pike had her back allowed Charlie to calm down enough to clear her head.

"Five more minutes, Pike. Then you can take her."

Pike wanted to argue, but Marcus outranked him several times over. He could make his point until he was blue in the face, but when give a direct order, even he couldn't defy that.

"Fine, but I will be watching, Marcus," he elaborated. He sent a quick, affirming nod to Charlie, silently conveying that he would be there for her and then limped out of the room.

She turned back to Marcus, a second wind entering her system as she glared at the man.

"We're both on the same side, Sir," she pointed out slowly. "I do not understand what you want, or why you have targeted me."

"That we are," he agreed. "Maybe I have gone about this wrong," he sighed. "The era from where you come is interesting to me. There are skills there, things that humanity have now lost. Many here would not know how to cope with the events I have no doubt you experienced. You are out of your time, but that doesn't mean we can't be valuable allies. You just don't want me as an enemy."

Charlie shook her head, a laugh wanting to erupt. "From what I understand, you're right. I have witnessed things from my era that no one here could possibly understand," she said, the image of planes flying into buildings a sharp reminder. "But I can't help you."

"You will, Miss Noland," he stated standing up, nodding to the wall behind her. "One way or another, I always get what I need. You're dismissed."

* * *

><p><strong>Leave a contribution in the little box ^_^<strong>


	5. Chapter Five: Don't Let Go

**Chapter Five: Don't Let Go**

The minute she exited the interrogation room with Admiral Pike at her rear, Charlie felt like she had run ten marathons. While she held her head high and a defiant gleam shined out from her eyes, the clenched fists at her side were shaking and there was a noticeable tremor near her pursed lips. As soon as she entered into the evening breeze outside the main building, she dropped a part of her façade. The breath eased from her tight chest and she allowed her shoulders to loosen, but she was still a mass of nerves as she turned to regard the limping man behind her, trying his hardest to keep up with her anxious strides.

"What the hell was that all about?" she snapped once he was within earshot.

"I'm trying to understand that myself," Pike answered, coming to rest in front of her, his breathing a little ragged. "That little interrogation blindsided me too. I thought Marcus just wanted to make sure you got the necessary evaluations before letting you near the command center of the _Enterprise_; something that isn't necessarily without merit."

"Yea, well I feel like I just got my ass handed to me, except it doesn't look like my ass, so I'm a little confused."

"Listen, I can understand why you're angry—"

"No shit, you think?" she snapped, crossing her arms as she took her anger out on the one person she could at that moment.

Pike shook his head with a sigh. "You and Jim are perfect for each other," he grumbled. "I can understand your anger and I'm not exactly the happiest person at the moment either. I told Jim I would take care of you, and that's what I'm going to do."

Charlie let her arms fall, running a quick hand through her loose hair before turning a grateful gaze onto Pike. "You're right, I'm sorry," she admitted. "But I was a bit surprised by the way that went. Marcus wants something from me; I just have no idea what that is or if I can give him what we wants."

Pike jerked his head toward the left and began walking, Charlie falling into step next to him. "I got that as well."

"Were you watching through the two way mirror?" she asked.

"How'd you know there was a two-way mirror?"

"Pfft," she scoffed. "It was obvious. I know things have changed a lot since I was last on Earth, but I've seen enough interrogations to know someone is always watching."

Pike smirked, admiration flashed in his cobalt stare as he nodded. "Yeah, I was watching. Something didn't sit well with me when Marcus ordered you away from Jim. I wanted to see for myself what he was on about, and I guess I was right about something."

"What do you think it is?" Charlie contemplated, now that she was far enough away and her mind stared to clear.

"I don't know," the admiral admitted grudgingly. "I might be able to find out though, it's just going to take time. You're going to have to be patient."

"No offense, sir, but patience really isn't in my vocabulary."

"I see why you and Jim get on so well," Pike smiled. "But you're going to have to trust me. Can you do that, Charlie?"

She stopped in the middle of the pathway, hurrying cadets and officers having to sidestep the pair and shooting annoyed glances their way. Charlie regarded the man in front of her, brushing her curling, tangled hair behind her ears as it swirled around in the wind. No one other than Jim had ever asked that of her before. Her life had always been duty, honor, and loyalty. Her father always pushing that trust was only for the man at your six, and the gun in your hand. After the events with Sagan, and now Admiral Marcus, Charlie was having a difficult time finding those who she could trust to have her back. But something stirred deep inside her psyche, a resonance that only made its appearance known in breathless seconds and gave her the truth of the situation.

"Yes," she breathed out, almost surprising herself with the answer. "I do trust you."

The lines around the admiral's eyes crinkled as he smiled, completely unaware of how powerful those words meant to the woman in front of him. "Good. Now let's get you to your home for the next few weeks."

Charlie nodded, and followed the admiral toward his house. She glanced up at the sky, the light fading as the sun started to set on San Francisco, washing it in gold and red. Up there somewhere was the _Enterprise,_ and she knew with divine certainty that she would be there again. She had to be.

* * *

><p>Pike's townhouse was spacious and comfortable as the admiral invited her inside, holding the door open for Charlie while she cautiously stepped forward. The lights snapped on, showing a setup similar to Jim's apartment but the colors were warm in tans, browns, and highlights of red. The cream kitchen was inviting, the couches were plush, and while Jim's view was of a wonderful vista including the Academy and San Francisco Bay, Pike's overlooked the city itself, the lights reflected on the warm walls. A deep-seated ache began to grow in her chest. She could picture Jim and her in a place similar to the admiral's, and the fact that she wasn't sharing it with him was another reason to focus her anger on Marcus and whatever scheme he had.<p>

"Jim dropped your stuff off earlier," Pike announced, shutting the door behind them and gesturing down the hallway. "Your room is upstairs two doors down on the left, and the bathroom is the first door on the right."

"I don't understand why I can stay with Jim while he's still on Earth," Charlie voiced as she dropped her bag by the island in the kitchen and hopped on a stool while Pike pulled out two glasses and a bottle of whiskey.

"Marcus thinks you're more inclined and have greater opportunity to run remaining with him."

"_Run_," she spat. "It makes me seem like some type of criminal." She nodded when Pike had filled her glass with a hefty three fingers of the amber liquid, bringing the glass to her lips and inhaling the poignant smell of the alcohol. A quick sip of warmth spread through her limbs almost instantly and the fire burned down into her belly as the whiskey worked its way down her throat. "Why is he so concerned about me anyhow? I understand the implications of me with the crew; I get that. I have to be vetted, but this whole idea of keeping me under lock and key, and stupid psych evals are pointless and a waste of my time."

"He didn't recommend the psych tests. I did."

Charlie about dropped her glass while her stomach plunged like a stone. "Why would you ask for that? I'm fine."

"But you're not, and you know it." His cerulean stare bore into her own, and she was forced to look away, her cheeks heating with indignation. "Listen, Charlie. I've been where you've been."

"You couldn't possibly understand what happened to me," she sputtered angrily.

"You wanna bet?" Pike barked. Charlie snapped her head up in surprise as the man limped around the island to take the seat next to her. "Didn't Jim ever tell you about the Nero incident?"

"Not really. He told me some, but never went into a lot of detail," she explained, staring at the medley of colors in the countertop. "I did look into it when I was researching how to get home, but I couldn't access the reports because I didn't have a Starfleet access code."

"Then let me fill in the rest. Nero took me prisoner, subjected me to all sort of tortures so he could get the security codes to Earth's defenses."

Charlie's eyes flickered to his and widened in astonishment. She knew that Pike had been Captain of the _Enterprise_ before Jim, and that something happened that caused Jim to take control of the ship. But Charlie had never learned the full details of the incident, and besides, her focus had been on Nero and the Red Matter. "He did?"

"Yes, so I know what it's like, Charlie. To feel scared and powerless, wondering when a force outside your control is going to pull the plug on your life. To have to do things you don't want to do, but knowing it's the right choice to save others. You're fighting the entire time against this seemingly impenetrable force, and just getting worn away until all you want to do is give up, but you can't. You just can't."

Tears rose and she tried vainly to swallow them and show strength in front of the admiral. But Pike hit the nail straight on the head, and Charlie felt the fragile defense she built dissolve as softly as butterfly wings. She sniffled, her focus blurred by the rising liquid in her eyes. She impatiently tried to brush the water away, annoyed by the weakness she thought her tears were.

"You have to let me help you," he continued. "You will get better, I can promise you that, but the first step in fixing a problem is admitting you have one."

Charlie snorted, wiping under her eyes. "I'm warning you now, I'm a little stubborn."

Pike smiled. "That's what Jim said, but you'll find I'm just as stubborn and I outrank you."

Charlie chuckled wetly. "By a bit, Sir." She paused, taking another larger sip of her whiskey as she considered voicing the question on her tongue. "Did you have nightmares after Nero?"

"Yes, I did." Pike rose, and wobbled over to a drawer, pulling out a paper pamphlet and handing it to Charlie to consider as he added, "I'm not going to subject you to my cooking on your first night here. I hope you like Chinese."

"Love it," she smiled softly. "How bad were they?" she added after a pause.

"The first few weeks I hardly remembered them," he sighed, leaning on the counter while Charlie read over the menu. "But I was so drugged while they worked on my spine that I couldn't tell you what happened from one day to another. After they released me, they were bad. I was waking up three-four times a night drenched in sweat and shaking. I couldn't sleep with any blanket or sheet because I just felt restrained."

"How did you get over it?"

"I haven't, but I'm better. Like you, I was required to attend therapy sessions and they helped me find ways to curb the fear."

Charlie wrinkled her nose as she confessed, "I don't like shrinks. My dad always said that it was weak to talk about our fear."

"I don't want to be rude, but your dad is a fool."

Charlie smirked and said, "No, you're fine. I always thought he was." At Pike's confused glance, she explained, "My dad and I – we've never had a good relationship."

"Why not?"

"He had to have things done his way and his way only, and he didn't care who he had to bowl over in the process."

"Sounds like a hard man to live up too."

"You could say that again," Charlie sighed, draining her glass with a quick shot. "He was always more of a commanding officer than a father. If my siblings or I did something wrong, we'd hear about it for weeks. If we did something right though, like ace a test or win a track meet, we'd get a grunt of acknowledgement at best. Well that applied to me, at least."

"What do you mean?" Pike asked, draining his whiskey as well and setting the empty cup on the counter with a clink.

Charlie pursed her lips while rolling her empty glass between her palms. "I've never lived up the Noland name the way he expected me to do. My brother and sister both went to military academies for high school and college; they participated in pseudo-military combat games, hell they were sneaking into the Air Force Academy's classes when Dad's colleagues weren't looking. My brother could identify any type of military plane, including its missile and defense system by the time he was nine, and my sister knew every Air Force regulation under the sun. She and Dad would try to best each other for different things using those regulations and protocols; almost like a game."

"But not you?"

"No," Charlie admitted, pushing the glass away. "Not me. I never had a taste for it, much to his disappointment. I fought tooth and nail against military school, to the point he sent me to boarding school in New England because he didn't want to hear me complain anymore. I went to a normal 'state' school for my undergraduate degree, and when I told Mom and Dad I was moving to England for a year, thereby _not_ going into officer's training, Dad basically told me to not bother coming back. 'We're Nolands,' he said. 'We are soldiers, all of us, and if you can't be the solider I raised you to be, what your family dictates you to be, you can get the hell out of my house.' So I did.

"And you know what really kills me?" she added, glaring at something only she could see. "I like the military. I like learning about martial strategy, and uncovering ancient battlefields. I've always had an interest in weaponry, and I was taking classes for fencing and archery. I just didn't want to practice what I learned."

"Have you talked to Jim about this?"

"No way," she shook her head vehemently. "He never even got to know his dad. I don't think it would be fair for me to blast mine in front of him. He wouldn't understand."

Pike stared at Charlie a moment, he gaze soft with sympathy. "Is he why you didn't return to the 21st century?"

"Partly," she shrugged. "I had every intention of going back, but when the transporter couldn't finish the job, I realized I had nothing left to return to. I did have a lot to stay for though. At least I think I do."

Pike smirked. "You think?"

Charlie smiled sheepishly, "Okay, I know I do, but this Marcus thing; it's intimidating. He's so much like my dad that all my defenses go right up."

"Well don't worry about Marcus," Pike affirmed, taking the menu once Charlie pointed out what she wanted. "Even as the head of Starfleet, there is only so far he can go. Once you start regularly attending therapy sessions, and we get you enrolled in a few class at the local college, he'll realize there's nothing different about you. You'll be back with Jim before Christmas."

"Thank you, Sir," Charlie spoke softly.

Pike smirked, picking up a communicator and before he dialed he said, "Anytime, Charlie. Kirk's like the son I never had, which I guess makes you a daughter by association."

"I guess I could fill that role," she smirked lightheartedly. And when the nightmares came again that night, Pike was there soothing her in a way her father never could.

* * *

><p>True to his word, Pike enrolled Charlie at a local community college in San Francisco to help her adapt to her new world. As the weeks passed, Charlie began to adjust and become more in tune with the world around her. Each night, Pike patiently assisted her with her homework, answering any questions she had and teaching her new skills that any child of the 23rd century already knew. It was as if she had to learn to walk all over again, and while there were a few stumbles at first, every day she grew a little more confident. She started speaking up in class and reaching out to both the professors and other students to learn as much as she could, but per the admiral's warning, Charlie never told anyone where she was really from. She knew she had to keep them at a distance, but she did gain a few study friends to ease her loneliness.<p>

Although her intellectual confidence grew, she was still struggling when it came to her emotional stability. Obeying the orders given by Marcus, Charlie attended sessions with a Starfleet counselor, and while she was incredibly resistant to start, ever so slowly she was allowing them to aid her. She was even finding some of their suggestions useful, and she gradually noticed a decrease in her nightmares and night sweats. All of her anger and fear were easing with each week, and Charlie was beginning to feel more like herself again. Pike was proud to see a sparkle in her amber eyes, and noted in his reports of her changed disposition. She wasn't as hostile as before and her smile was more open and honest.

The only matter that had not been cleared up involved Admiral Marcus and his apparent interest in her. They continued to have weekly meetings that resulted in little sway in either's direction. Marcus was convinced that Charlie had seen more military combat than she really had, and no amount of persuasion assuaged him of that idea. He asked things of her that she just couldn't answer, including militant strategies of her 'brilliant' general father, and how he defeated an army of something called the augments. Having only a basic knowledge of the actual Star Trek universe, Charlie was at a loss of what Marcus was talking about. She had only ever watched The Next Generation series, and had a vague understanding of the original. All she knew was that the timeline was now changed, and events were unfolding differently than what she knew. She still kept her vow never to tell anyone of her knowledge, but it became increasingly difficult with Marcus's interrogations.

Still, no matter how many classes she took or the number of therapy sessions she attended, Charlie still felt like an awkward puzzle piece without Jim at her side. He was her anchor in her new universe, and whilst she was confident she could stand on her own two feet should the need arise, she still missed him. He had left the following week after she moved in with Pike, Starfleet giving him several cartography and survey missions of surrounding solar systems. The _Enterprise_ was cleared for repairs and upgrades, and in his daily conversation with her, Jim told Charlie of how well the ship was handling and the adventures he and crew were experiencing.

"It was incredible to see George again," Jim told her one night during their daily call. He was sitting in his quarters, bare-chested and his hair still damp from a shower. "After all this time, my brother was on Deneva and I never knew. He even has a family; he's got a son."

Charlie smiled, the late afternoon sun shining into her room making her eyes and hair shine in bright ambers and chestnuts. "That must have been wonderful to see him, Jim. To get a part of your family back."

"I wish you could have met him," Jim confessed with a sad smile.

Charlie glanced away from the screen with a sigh. "Me too," she admitted, bringing her gaze back to the screen. "But, maybe we can go there on shore leave sometime when I'm back on the _Enterprise_. Give you both time to reconnect and you could get to know your nephew."

"I think it could be arranged," Jim agreed. "How are your classes going? Scotty about turned the ship around after I told him what you learned in your practical engineering course. He said something along the lines of 'no person should ever be allowed near anything technological after what that nitwit is teachin'!' Or something like that."

Charlie laughed, shaking her head as she responded, "oh poor Scotty. Well tell him I did explain that in practical applications, the sensor array can be modified to pick up subspace distortions by adjusting the delta scanners, but the professor brushed me off. He said that in order to divert power to pick up the distortions, one would have to manually change the scanners on the outside of the ship."

Kirk shook his head as said, "I am not telling Scotty that. _I_ won't hear the end of it. He's already griping to me that someone else is teaching his 'prized student.' It's interesting that being from the 21st century, you know the components of a spaceship better than a professor of this age."

"Well, I've had some pretty good teachers," Charlie grinned.

Jim smiled back. "True, no one can compare to my crew."

"Perfectionist," she teased, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, I have a pretty good record regarding our missions," Jim argued good-naturedly. "We always get the job done."

Raising her hands up in surrender, she said, "I know that. I wouldn't be here if you weren't good at your job."

Jim's azure eyes dimmed as he asked, "Is everything else going okay? Marcus isn't pressuring too much, is he? I swear, I'll send the Federation president after him if—"

"Woah, Charming, slow down," Charlie ordered quickly. "Everything's fine, I mean as much as it can be without you here."

He sighed, running a hand through his still damp hair and sending small droplets of water to scatter around. "I wish I could be there, or better yet have you here with me. This whole arrangement is ridiculous."

Charlie leaned back in her chair in a huff while she blew a stray strand of dark hair from her eyes. "Yea, I think so too. Now, I will admit that the therapy sessions have been helping, and Pike has been absolutely wonderful, but I don't fit in around here like I did on the ship," she admitted. "I feel like a black sheep almost. I'm _just_ different enough that things always feel weird; disjointed. It doesn't feel like it did when I was with you. Maybe that's weak to admit," she gazed sheepishly as the screen, crossing her arms in front of her, "but the counselor did say I should try to be more open with those closest to me."

Jim softened, leaning closer to screen as he said, "You're not weak by telling me how you feel. I can't even imagine what it must be like to be living in a place outside your own time, but don't think for a moment you don't belong. You're missing your family, and I can tell you they all miss you too. Even Spock is missing you."

"Spock?" she scoffed.

"He keeps asking about you, which I interpret to mean he misses you," Kirk grinned. "I talked to Pike, and if things keep going the way they are, you should be home soon."

"I hope so. I miss you, Jim."

"I miss you too, Spitfire," Jim teased. "We have a few more surveys to do before we can head back to Earth. I'm hoping we'll be done in the next few weeks, which should be plenty of time for the review board at Headquarters to pass you through."

"Review board?" Charlie squeaked.

"Didn't Pike tell you?" At the shake of her head, Jim cursed softly. "I guess he left it for me to do. Your file and the notes on your progress will go through a process of a review board, probably headed by Admiral Marcus who will then decide if you can return to the _Enterprise_."

"And if they decide not to let me?" Charlie growled.

"They will," Jim affirmed. "After the progress you've made, the steps you have taken to comply with what he was asking, plus you'll have Pike and the entire _Enterprise_ crew backing you. They will have no choice but to invalidate the claim that you shouldn't be with us; with me."

"I'm trying so hard, Jim."

"I know, and they will see that. I will make them see it."

Charlie paused, consciously setting her heart rate back to normal. "You're probably right. And just so you know, it's sexy how determined you get."

Kirk snorted, a large grin breaking out across his face as his sapphire gaze sparkled with mischief. "I could tell you how _determined_ I would be right now if you were here."

Immediately heat flared in Charlie's cheeks and her eyes shot toward her bedroom door, hoping Pike who was working in his office next-door didn't hear. She glanced back at her screen, seeing the challenge in Jim's expression and matched it with an unamused one of her own. "I bet you would be," she responded with a smirk. "But unfortunately, I have a night class, so you might have to _determinately_ wait until next time."

"Oh I will, Charlie. I'm determined that once you're back here, you're going to have no doubt how much you belong on this ship."

"I love you, Kirk," Charlie smiled.

"I love you too. I'll talk to you tomorrow."


	6. Chapter Six: Homeland

***Chapter Warning* M rated themes found in this chapter. Nothing too graphic, just warning you now so you don't yell at me later. *Chapter Warning***

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Six: Homeland<strong>

The next month passed in a blur of activity for Charlie. Between her classes, assignments, therapy sessions, and enjoying time with Admiral Pike who fast became the father she always craved, time flew by at an alarming rate. Her nightmares had all but disappeared since she began visiting her counselor, and her knowledge of the 23rd century was growing exponentially. When she brought up the idea of joining the Academy at Starfleet, Pike not only embraced the idea, but wholeheartedly agreed to sponsor her application.

"You're exactly the type we need," he told her. "I was hoping you would choose to join, but I wasn't going to pressure you."

"Just drop not-so-subtle hints?" Charlie smirked over her box of Chinese noodles. The admiral had taken to leaving pamphlets of the academy scattered strategically all over the apartment for Charlie to find. Which she did. A lot.

"You can't blame a man for trying," Pike chuckled with an innocent shrug.

She also could not contain her excitement when he informed her that after their survey mission at the planet Nibiru, the _Enterprise_ would be returning to Earth for a two-week shore leave as they waited for their next assignment. She would finally be able to see Jim again, Marcus having eased his restrictions on her movements the week before.

Although Pike was gone more than normal in the week leading to Jim's return, he made sure to arrange Charlie's move back to Jim' apartment.

"It's only right that you stay with him," he said the night before Jim was to arrive. Both he and Charlie had sprawled out on the couch in their pajamas; he worked on the latest reports and logs from ships around the quadrant while she finished her latest bioengineering assignment. "But I am going to miss having you around."

Charlie smiled, scooting over to wrap her arms around the admiral, her cheek leaning onto his chest. "Me too," she mumbled into his flannel shirt. "Thanks for being the dad I always needed."

Pike's arms wrapped around the young woman's frame as his own cheek leaned on the top of her hair. "Anytime, kid. You'll always have me looking after you. You're an honorary Pike now."

Thinking over the night before, Charlie grinned to herself as she stood in the hangar bay waiting for the shuttle from the _Enterprise_ to arrive. Her knees were jelly from anxiousness and she began to pace back and forth while her stomach swirled with butterflies. She was so excited she could hardly contain herself, but she didn't want to embarrass the admiral who was casually leaning against a set of storage containers.

"They'll be here soon," he chuckled, ignoring her unheated glare as she continued to move.

"Not soon enough," she grumbled and tensed when the sound of s shuttle grew louder. She relaxed though when the shuttle flew by.

While they waited, a fidgety ensign appeared next to the pair. He was a young boy, younger even than Chekov with bright red hair who turned the same shade when he noticed Pike in the corner. "Ex-excuse me, Admiral Pike?" he stammered.

Pike shoved off the container onto his cane and smiled kindly at the frightened boy. "That's me, Son. What can I do for you?"

"Admiral Marcus sent this for you," he squeaked. "Says it's urgent."

With a perplexed look on his face, Pike reached out and took the PADD from the boy's hands. "Thank you, Ensign—"

"Peterson, Sir. Lloyd Peterson."

"Ensign Peterson," Pike nodded as glanced down at whatever written on the screen. "Thank you for delivering this. Dismissed."

"A-aye, Sir!" he saluted with a snap then scurried away.

Charlie gazed after the boy both amused and perplexed. "Jumpy little thing, isn't he?" she remarked.

Pike smirked. "You know, not everyone has the same bravado as you and Kirk seem to unnaturally possess."

"It's a gift," Charlie shrugged with a grin, spinning around when she heard another shuttle approaching. Behind her, Pike swore and she glanced over her shoulder in alarm. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," he growled, limping away as fast as his cane would let him. "There's an emergency I need to go handle," he threw over his shoulder. "Give my regrets to Jim. I have to go."

"O-okay," Charlie answered uncertain as the man hurried through the hanger bay towards the darkening sky of evening. As he left, a gust of air blew pass and propelled her hair into her face as she whirled toward the landing shuttle. All thoughts of Pike drifted from her mind as she strained her neck left and right, trying to see around those exiting the vehicle once it settled on the bay floor.

Uhura was the first to find her, waving at Charlie with a smile that didn't quite meet her dark eyes. Charlie waved back as she noticed a distinct tension between her and Spock, who had followed the woman out of the shuttlecraft. Bones came after the pair, looking decidedly grumpier than when he left; a feat Charlie was impressed by. He shuffled down the stairs, and gave Charlie a quick hug before he hurried on his way, grumbling something about 'boneheaded captains.'

Then _he_ came. He ducked out of the door to the shuttle and the breath in Charlie's lungs froze. She couldn't believe that after four long months of isolation, she was finally with him again. Jim stood up straight, his cobalt gaze roaming over the crowd of other _Enterprise_ family and crewmembers until they landed on her. He broke out into a cheeky grin and they both dashed toward each other, skirting around the others disembarking until they crashed together. Lips sought the others and arms were wrapping around bodies in a frenzied collision. Charlie found herself lifted off her feet, crushed to Jim's chest as her lips moved hungrily against his; feeling she could fly just by the sheer joy of his arms around her again. Jim set her on her feet with care, and only because oxygen was required to survive did they break their embrace.

"Hey," Charlie whispered, her eyes shining like bright amber beacons as a large grin stretched across her face.

Jim continued to smile as he said, "Hey yourself. Miss me?"

"Every damn day."

Jim laughed, releasing her only long enough to pick up the bag he had dropped, and then draped an arm around her shoulders. "Where's Admiral Pike?" he asked, regarding the emptying hangar bay with surprise. "I thought he was coming with you."

"He was here," Charlie answered as Jim steered her though the crowd of people toward the exit. "But something from Admiral Marcus made him leave just as your shuttle came it. He told me to tell you he was sorry he had to miss seeing you, but there was an emergency of some kind."

"I hope it's not anything too terrible," Jim said with a frown.

Charlie shrugged, wrapping her hair around her wrist to keep it from blowing around in the evening breeze. "He did run out of here pretty quick."

Jim continued to frown, his gaze distant in deep thought. Charlie lightly jabbed him in the ribs, reproaching, "Hey, you're off the clock. Now, it's time to have some fun."

"What kind of fun were you thinking?" Jim uttered huskily, leaning down to nuzzle near her ear and sending waves of goosebumps over her flesh.

"Stop that!" she laughed, shoving him away. "Later. I was thinking of going out to dinner first, seeing as you've only had replicated food for the last few weeks."

"A pizza does sound nice. We could order in," he suggested wagging his eyebrows.

"Is that all you can think about right now?" she queried, one brow raised in humor and her arms crossed as they headed toward Jim's place.

"Come on! It's been what, four months? Tell me you haven't been thinking about it too."

Rolling her eyes, but grinning nonetheless, Charlie muttered, "Rogue."

"That's why you love me," he smirked.

"Oh is that it?" she laughed, sliding through the glass door that Jim held open for her, and hurrying into the lobby of the apartment building. The marble floors reflected the overhanging chandeliers while their feet echoed through the cavernous room. "I thought it was because you were intelligent. No wait, it's that devilishly flare of bravado that amuses me. Can't forget that sarcasm too. But no, according to you, it's because you're a scoundrel. What would my father say?" she breathed out dramatically as they stepped onto the elevator.

Before she could realize what happened, Charlie found herself pinned against the wall of the lift with Jim's hands on her hips and his lips on her neck. All the air that had been in her lungs whooshed out by the intimate contact and she gasped, instinctively tilting her head back to give him better access to the delicate white flesh under her ear. His hands began roaming up her sides and under her shirt, his fingernails teasing her skin to just under her breasts. She became a light of fire, her inner heat burning with such passion she began to pant as the sensations from his hands and lips sent her blood boiling. Her cheeks flushed and her knees wobbled, only the force of his body against hers kept her standing.

His hands moved from under her shirt and into her hair as he maneuvered her lips to his, searing them with his own passion and drinking her in as if she was an oasis. His tongue moved against the tender pink flesh, silently asking for permission. With a groan from deep inside, Charlie granted access, and he dove in with vigor as her arms wound up around his neck.

Jim pushed his body against her harder, his hands unable to touch enough of hot skin. After agonizing weeks of loneliness, he could barely contain the sensations rolling through him. He wanted to touch, and kiss, and lick every avenue of her skin, he wanted to hear her subtle gasps when he found that place that made her squirm.

They were both so lost in each other, neither acknowledged the ding of the elevator arriving at Jim's floor, or the soft swoosh as the doors opened. Only a gentle cough caused Charlie's eyes to snap open, noticing the elderly couple gaping at them from the hallway. With her cheeks now red in embarrassment, Charlie shoved Jim away, soothing her frazzled hair and rumpled clothes back into place while Jim grinned cheekily. Picking up his bag, he followed Charlie as she darted around the couple, her eyes on the floor as she bit her lip in chagrin. The woman entered the now vacated elevator with a huff, but the man sent a quick wink and a grin to Kirk before he followed his wife.

Chuckling, Jim caught up with Charlie, leaning down to whisper, "I think your dad would think I was quite a catch."

The next thing he knew, she punched him.

* * *

><p>The pizza box was open on the coffee table, three quarters of its contents already devoured. Two plates were stacked next to the box along with two glasses and an empty bottle of wine. A trail of clothing lay scattered throughout the darkened living room and kitchen, leading down the hallway to a back bedroom where music was playing on an old record player. Laughter could be heard above the music, and a soft squeal echoed throughout the apartment.<p>

Charlie was trying her best to fend off Jim who had unknowingly found a ticklish spot on her side, and was now attempting to discover other entertaining areas of her body.

"Jim! Stop! Please!" Charlie gasped between laughs, shoving at his shoulders and trying the wriggle her body out from his roaming hands.

"I never knew you could make that sound," he laughed, not registering her blows. "And you hit like a girl."

"That's it," she growled as she reached up to grab the pinky on his right hand, wrenching it back until he had no choice but to release her. Whipping around, Charlie wrenched his arm behind his back, and the next thing Jim knew he face planted into the mattress with Charlie straddling his back. "Ha! Pinned ya," she grinned.

It took him a moment to register what had happened. "Where the hell did you learn that move?" he groaned, rolling onto his back as Charlie released his arm still smiling ear to ear.

"I took a couple self-defense classes," she shrugged, a triumphant gleam to her eye. "And Pike taught me a thing or two."

Rubbing his hand, Jim shook his head as he sat up, impressed but also weary of the slight woman. "Remind me to talk to Pike to see what things he taught you."

"I'd be happy to show you," she smirked, cracking her knuckles.

"Thanks, but no thanks," he said, his hands raised in surrender. "I have a feeling I'll find out eventually."

"Why? Planning on being bad?" she whispered, leaning forward to capture his lips with her own.

"Mm mm, very," he grinned, his arms reaching out to pull her on top of him as he leaned back. The kiss intensified, and Charlie could feel the heat burning in her core and spreading through her limbs. The way his hands glided across her soft skin and the hard muscles under her fingers forced a groan to resonate deep in her very being. She was on fire with desire, and no matter how hard she tried to quench her thirst for him, Charlie was never able to drink her fill. Jim was a drug she was happily addicted to, and the time they spent apart only intensified her attraction to him.

With her mind distracted, Charlie found herself on her back with a gasp. Jim hovered over her and slid down to her neck and collarbone, leaving little love bites behind. His hands found those delicious spots that made her purr and she wriggled under him, desperate for more friction in the place she needed it most. Between the pulsing of the music and the ministrations of the man above, Charlie found herself rising toward that cliff of pleasure. When they joined together, Charlie let out a breathless sigh, the unity she felt with him easing the tortures of the months apart.

Faster than either would have liked or admitted to, they crested their individual peaks of desire and began floating back to earth, both happily sated for the time being. Jim flipped onto his back and pulled Charlie to his side, her sweaty head resting on his rapidly rising and falling chest.

Their breathing had just returned to normal when Jim's communicator began beeping somewhere in the room. With a groan, Jim pulled himself out from under her head, and as she flopped onto her pillow, she whined, "You're not seriously going to get that right now, are you?"

He pulled the blankets up, searching for the loudly beeping device. Clothes were thrown about and he shut off the record player until he finally found the gadget halfway under the bed.

"I have to. You never know what it might be," he said as he answered. "Kirk here. Admiral Pike! Uh, no I'm not busy." Charlie raised unamused brow and crossed her arms, glaring at the man. Jim just shrugged innocently and headed out of the room, quickly throwing on a pair of boxers as he did. "Yea, I got back alright. Sorry I missed seeing you . . ." his voice trailed off as he wandered down the hall.

Charlie waited a couple minutes then shrugged, getting out of the bed to use the bathroom, wondering why Pike would call so late at night. Figuring it was probably something important, she promptly returned to the warm confines of the covers, snuggling in as she breathed in the scent of Jim and being home. Just as she settled in to go to sleep, Jim appeared back in the bedroom. He dropped the communicator on the shelving near her head with a sigh and crawled under the covers.

"What did he want?" Charlie asked, turning onto her side to face him while he went about arranging himself.

"He wants a meeting at 08:00 hours tomorrow morning," Jim answered, laying back and pulling Charlie to cuddle at his side. "Says he has something important to discuss with me and Spock, and that it can't wait."

"Do you think it has something to do with me, and review board?" Charlie asked, rising up enough to stare into Jim's eyes. "He said that it was going to be soon."

"I don't think so," he shook his head, pulling her back down and closing his eyes with a contented deep breath. "He would have asked for you too. Might be that new five year assignment everyone's been talking about. Whatever it is, we'll worry about it in the morning. I just want to enjoy having you back."

Jim felt as Charlie grinned, rising her head only enough to kiss his chest before snuggling back into his side. With his arms wrapped around her, both fell into a contented sleep, something neither had had in four months.

* * *

><p>"Spock, I'm telling you, this is why he called. I can feel it," Jim said the next morning as he and Spock hiked over to Admiral Pike's office for their early morning meeting. He was holding his hat in his hand, a clear refusal to follow standard dress regulations as they walked toward the tallest towers on the Starfleet campus. He had left Charlie sleeping in his room, not having the heart to wake after wearing her out right before dawn.<p>

"Your feeling aside," Spock said, the barest hint of exasperation in his voice. "I consider it highly unlikely that we will be selected for the new program."

"Why else would Pike want to see us?" Jim asked. "Forget about seniority. They gave us the newest ship in the fleet. I mean who else are they going to send?"

"I can think of numerous possibilities."

"A five-year mission, Spock!" Jim exclaimed interrupting the Vulcan. "That's deep space! That's uncharted territory! Think about how incredible that's going to be."

"And what about Miss Noland?" Spock queried entering through the door into the main lobby. "Have you not considered the possibilities that such a mission would place a great amount of pressure on her in your current relationship."

"She would come with us," Jim explained, sending a wink at a couple of women who walked by, causing them to roll their eyes.

"Regulation protocols do not allow for the appearance of non-active civilian family members onboard a starship, Captain. You know this."

"Then where is she going to go, Spock?" Jim snapped coming to a stop in front of the Vulcan. "It's not like she has anyone on Earth waiting for her, and I'm not about to leave her behind again. Pike knows the situation. I bet you he's come up with something. He'll support us."

Spock merely ducked his head in agreement, not wanting to argue further with the Captain. Both men checked in with the security on the main floor, then headed over to one of the lifts and took the elevator up to floor holding many of the admiral offices. Both men tucked their hats under their arms, and after a quick conversation with his yeoman, Kirk and Spock were led into Admiral Pike's office.

The man was leaning back in his chair, a PADD in his hand as he read the report listed on it. Cars and shuttlecrafts were zooming by outside the large rectangular window that opened toward the city of San Francisco, light streaming into the large and spacious office. Both men came to stand behind the chairs facing the admiral's desk, and not bothering to look up, Pike drawled, "'Uneventful.'"

"Admiral?" Jim questioned.

"It's the way you described the survey of Nibiru in your captain's log," Pike answered, looking up at the man.

"Uh, yes, sir, I didn't want to waste your time going over the details—"

"Yeah, tell me more about this Volcano," Pike interrupted, setting down the PADD. "Data says it was highly volatile. If it were to erupt it would wipe out the planet."

"Let's hope it doesn't, Sir."

"Something tells me it won't," Pike pointed out.

"Well, Sir, volatile is all relative," Kirk explained. "Maybe our data was off."

"Or maybe it didn't erupt because Mr. Spock detonated a cold fusion device inside it right after a civilization that's barely invented the wheel happened to see a starship rising out of their ocean!" Pike exclaimed. "That is pretty much how you described it, is it not?" he added, gesturing to Spock.

Jim, stunned, turned to Spock and interrupting him asked, "You filed a report? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I incorrectly assumed that you would be truthful in your captain's log."

"Yeah, I would have been if I didn't have to save your life," Jim pointed out.

"A fact for which I am immeasurably grateful and the very reason I felt it necessary to take responsibility for the actions . . ."

"Take responsibility, yeah. That would be so noble, Pointy, if you weren't also throwing me under the bus."

"'Pointy'?" Spock asked, confused. "Is that a derogatory reference to –?"

"Gentlemen," Pike interrupted the argument, rising and grabbing his cane. "Starfleet's mandate is to explore and observe, not to interfere."

"Had the mission according to plan, Admiral," Spock announced as the man limped around his desk. "The indigenous species would never have been away of our interference."

"That's a technicality."

"I am Vulcan, Sir. We embrace technicality."

"Are you giving me attitude, Spock?" Pike growled warningly.

"I'm expressing multiple attitudes simultaneously, Sir," Spock said in a Vulcan form of cheekiness. "To which are you referring?"

"Out," Pike ordered. "You're dismissed, Commander."

Spock stared at the Admiral a moment, and then turned to Jim who stubbornly kept his eyes on the wall behind the admiral's desk. Once the Vulcan was gone from the room, Pike said to Jim, "Do you have any idea how much of a pain in the ass you are?"

Jim paused a moment, then answered, "I think so, Sir."

"So tell me what you did wrong, what's the lesson to be learned here?" Pike asked exasperated.

"Never trust a Vulcan."

"Now, see, you can't even answer the question," he snapped. "You lied. On an official report, you lied. You think the rules don't apply to you 'cause you disagree with them."

"That's why you talked me into signing up in the first place," Jim argued. "It's why you gave me your ship."

"I gave you my ship because I saw a greatness in you," Pike said. "And now, I see you haven't got an ounce of humility. Even with the introduction of Charlie into your life, you're still making these boneheaded decisions."

"What was I supposed to do," Jim growled, fully addressing Pike. "Let Spock die?"

"You're missing the point."

"I don't think I am, Sir. What would you have done?"

"I wouldn't have risked my First Officer's life in the first place! You were supposed to survey a planet, not alter its destiny! You violated a dozen Starfleet regulations, you've put Charlie's review under suspicion, and almost got everyone under your command killed."

"Except I didn't!" Jim snapped back. "You know how many crew members I've lost? Not one!"

"That's your problem, you think you're infallible!" Pike shouted. "You think you can't make a mistake. It's a pattern with you! The rules are for other people!"

"Some should be," Jim said off handily.

"And what's worse is you using blind luck to justify your playing God! Did you even _think_ what this would do to Charlie when she finds out?"

"Charlie's got nothing to do with this," Jim barked.

"Like hell she doesn't," Pike bit back. "Her association with you, the circumstances of her involvement with the _Enterprise_ is all part of the review boards process of releasing her back into the general population and allowing her access to you and your crew; never mind stepping back onboard the _Enterprise._ Your actions have a direct effect on her, and her future."

Jim glanced away with his lips pursed, his hands fisted into his hat and at his side.

"You told me to protect her until you came back, but how can I do that when she might need protection from you," Pike growled. Jim snapped his head to stare at admiral's hard and unforgiving gaze, blinking in confusion. "You brought this girl into my life, and I have come to love her like a daughter. It'll be a cold day in hell before someone hurts her, you included.

"Now, given the circumstances, this has been brought to Admiral Marcus's attention. He convened a special tribunal, to which I was not invited." Pike paused a moment, letting the reality of the situation descend on Kirk. "You understand what Starfleet regulations mandate be done at this point. They've taken the _Enterprise_ away from you. They're sending you back to the Academy. I don't even know what this'll mean for Charlie."

Jim was stunned, searching for a sign of leeway, of hope in Pike's eyes. "Admiral, listen . . ."

"No, I'm not going to listen. . ."

". . . I can't justify . . ."

". . . Why should I listen? I'm not going to listen . . ."

". . . I understand regulations . . ."

". . . You don't listen to anyone but yourself . . ."

". . . But ever decision I've made . . ."

". . . No! I can't listen!" Pike shouted, cutting off Jim's argument. "You don't comply with the rules, you don't take responsibility for _anything_, and you don't respect the chair. You know why? Because you're not ready for it."

"Sir, if I could only talk to Marcus—"

"You think Marcus will listen to you after this?" the admiral snapped. "I'm going to have a hell of a time convincing him not to send you back to Command 101."

"I understand, Sir, but there has to be something I can do for Charlie. She can't have everything taken away from her because of me."

"I'll worry about Charlie and the review board," Pike snapped, limping back to his desk. He fell into his chair with a small groan. "The only saving grace she has is the fact that she had no knowledge and didn't take part in Nibiru."

"How did you know I didn't—?"

"Tell her?" Pike glared. "All of her comms were recorded Jim."

Shaking his head, Jim muttered, "She's going to love that."

Pike smirked, as he nodded. "I can only imagine what she's going to say when you tell her. You're dismissed, Jim."

"Sir, I swear, if you just let me—"

"Dismissed," Pike ordered firmly. "I'm not going to tell you again.

Jim snapped his mouth close and nodded. He paused a moment, as if debating saying one more thing, before he turned and exited the office, plunking his hat on his head as he did so. He was leaving one battle, and heading toward another.

* * *

><p><strong>Please review!<strong>


	7. Chapter Seven: Sound the Bugle

**You all were really, really quiet last week. I hope that doesn't mean you aren't enjoying De Sanguine Regis. I really like hearing what you do like, and even what you don't. I take all of your opinions to heart and try to make the best, enjoyable story I can, so please, let me know! I promise I don't bite.**

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><p><strong>Chapter Seven: Sound the Bugle<strong>

Charlie blinked open her amber eyes, squinting against the light of the midmorning sun streaming into the bedroom. Rolling onto her back with a sigh, she stretched and felt the delicious crack of her spine and pull of her now sore muscles. She lay stretched on the bed, enjoying her first morning back in Jim's apartment. His scent clung to the sheets, compelling Charlie to snuggle back into them while she waited for his return. She knew she missed him when he was away, but now that she was back somewhere that screamed of Jim, the ache it caused in her heart told her to what length she had. After burying it deep for weeks, she could now let herself relax and enjoy being with the man she loved.

Deciding she should rise for the day, even though she didn't expect Jim to be back for a few more hours, Charlie sat up and ran a hand through her tangled dark hair, wincing as it pulled at her scalp. After the number of rounds she and Jim had gone through the night before, she was surprised it wasn't more tangled, and with a mischievous grin plastered on her face, she stood and headed toward the bathroom to take a shower. She had just stepped out of the hot water and was reaching for a towel when she heard the door to the apartment close with a loud snap. Surprised that Jim was back from his meeting so soon, she rushed to dry off. Wrapping the towel around her body, she headed into the bedroom and found the captain changing out of his grey, dress uniform into normal civilian clothing.

"Morning, how'd your meeting go?" she asked casually as she walked up to place a kiss on Jim's cheek but he brushed her away.

"I don't really want to talk about it," he snapped, slamming the drawer closed and stomping out of the room. Charlie stood stunned a moment before she grabbed her robe and followed Jim into the living room.

"Hey, what happened?" she questioned, wrapping her robe around her body while Jim went about making a sandwich in the kitchen, slamming drawers and cabinets left and right.

"I said I didn't want to talk about it," Jim growled, turning his back to her.

"Jim, you can talk to me," she pressed.

He sighed, leaning on his braced hands. "Not right now, Charlie. Just leave me alone."

Her brows rose in surprise and she agreed, "Okay, well I'll be in the bedroom if you need me."

Turning around with a frown, Charlie headed back to the bedroom to finish dressing and blow-drying her hair. Jim needed to time to settle down from whatever had angered him, but that didn't stop Charlie's curiosity. She had only ever seen him behave like that when there was something wrong happening to her. She paused as she reached the bedroom, a momentary panic gripping her chest. Had the review board ruled against her and Pike didn't want her to know just yet? Does she have to spend more time on Earth and away from Jim? Shaking her head to get rid of such thoughts, she changed clothes and headed back to the large bathroom adjacent to her and Jim's bedroom. She would not give in to despair just yet; not when things were beginning to look so positive.

She had just turned off the hairdryer when from the doorway, Jim muttered, "I lost the _Enterprise._"

Charlie jumped with a scream as she dropped the hairdryer, breaking off a piece from the head. Spinning around, she noticed him standing in the frame to the bedroom, his hands in his denim pockets and his shoulders hung in defeat.

It took a moment for her to register what he said, her hand held over her pounding heart as she stared at the morose man. She blinked a couple times then stammered, "What do you mean you lost the _Enterprise_?! Go find it!"

"It's not that easy," Jim said shaking his head.

"Well, why not?" she retorted, reaching down to snatch the dryer off the floor and dropping it on the counter with a loud clank. "What the hell happened?"

With a deep sigh, he leaned his shoulder against the doorframe, crossing his arms and explained, "You know how on your last mission we were told to survey Nibiru?" At her nod he continued, "Well our sensors indicated an active volcano that was hours away from erupting and wiping out the planet. There was a civilization on the planet that was in the first stages of their agricultural revolution, completely unaware of what was going to happen when that volcano went off . . ."

Charlie blinked, staring at Jim incredulously as his paused lingered. "You didn't," she uttered. "Please tell me you didn't do what I think you did."

Jim glanced away from her accusatory glare, instead he stared intently at the mirror and shrugged. "The plan was to lower Spock into the volcano where he would set up a cold fusion device that would prevent the eruption while Bones and I led the Nibiruans away, thereby hiding our existence. Sulu, Uhura, and Spock took a shuttle while the _Enterprise_ was submerged in the nearby ocean, but we didn't calculate the amount of damage the heat and ash would cause to the vehicle. Sulu and Uhura barely made it out, and Spock was left behind in the volcano."

"How'd you get him out?"

"We raised the _Enterprise_ out of the ocean and flew over the vent; beaming him onboard seconds before the device went off."

"In front of the Nibiruans?"

"Yeah," he admitted, reaching up to rub the back of his neck.

"Huh," she nodded, grabbing her hairbrush and running it through her dark hair with firm, angry strokes. She couldn't believe he had broken one of the primary doctrines of Starfleet. The Prime Directive was the core for why the Federation worked, why there was a Federation to begin with. "Did you address the reasons why you made such a decision in your Captain's log?" she asked, glancing at Jim through the mirror.

"Ah, not in any particular fashion."

"What do you mean 'not in any particular fashion'?"

"I didn't tell them."

Setting the brush back on the counter with care, she asked, "So how'd they find out?"

"Spock filed a report because he felt it was his fault and should take ownership of the situation—"

"But because you never actually _told_ the admiralty about it, they were a bit confused by Spock's report, weren't they?" she snapped spinning around.

"Confused is not the word I'd use."

"Then what?" she glared. "Jim, the Prime Directive is the most important protocol of Starfleet. What were you thinking going against that?"

With a scowl, Jim spun on his heel and ran a hand through his hair in frustration as he stomped into the bedroom. "I've already got it from everyone else, Charlie. I don't need it from you too."

"Well what do you expect me to say?" she snapped as she followed. "Even _I_ know not to mess with that and I'm not even from this century."

"I screwed up, alright?" he barked, tossing on his leather jacket. "I trusted my damn First Officer who had a Vulcan guilty conscience which constituted I get thrown under the bus for it."

"Spock was right to report it, Jim," Charlie argued. "Something that big, he had no choice, just like you should have filed it in your Captain's Log."

"So, wait, you agree with that Pointy-eared bastard?" Jim accused.

"Yes, I do," she agreed, crossing her arms. "Jim, the Prime Directive is what keeps the Federation functioning. It's why there hasn't been an all-out war with the Klingons or Romulans; why you're able to do what you do. To go against that, even for the right reasons is ethically wrong."

"I can't believe this," he breathed. "I can't believe your siding with the Vulcan over me."

"I'm not taking sides," she explained with an exasperated sigh. "I'm just telling it like it is; no bullshit."

"Great, wonderful," Jim muttered sarcastically, picking up his communicator and keys. "I love knowing you think that I'm not fit to be captain; makes me feel all warm and fuzzy."

"That's not what I mean, and you know it," Charlie asserted. "You made a mistake trying to do the right thing, and I don't think you should have lost the _Enterprise_ over it, but I'm not in the admiralty, so it isn't my decision."

"Because that makes me feel so much better," he glared, stomping from the bedroom.

"Argghhh," she growled stomping her foot in frustration before following him out. "Goddammit, Jim, stop being so stubborn. I don't think you're not fit to be captain. No one else would have done what you did to save me, nor do I think they could have pulled it off even if they tried. But there are rules that even you can't argue against."

"Yeah, I got that," he mumbled, heading for the door. "Well no problem anymore because I am now headed back to the Academy where I get to relearn the rules all over again."

Charlie paused mid step, her head tilted to the side in confusion. "What do you mean go back to the Academy? I thought you were just demoted to commander or whatever."

Jim opened the door and sighed, his arm rising to brace against the frame. "They're sending me back because apparently I didn't learn anything the first time around."

"Oh Jim," she voiced sympathetically. "I'm so sorry."

"Yea, well sorry doesn't give me my ship back. I'm going out for a while, don't wait up."

The door slammed shut in Charlie's face and she stood stunned, her hand reaching out to comfort the man who no longer stood there. Her hand clenching into a fist, Charlie dropped her arm and turned toward the apartment, it feeling far emptier than it did an hour before. She stood there a moment longer before pursing her lips and coming to a decision. Grabbing her jacket, purse, and her own communicator, she set out to catch up with Jim. He needed her now much in the same way she needed him, and she'd be damned if she didn't provide support when he needed it most. Now, if only she could find him.

* * *

><p>She spent hours searching all over Starfleet's main campus before heading into the city of San Francisco itself. Having never spent time with Jim outside his apartment except for those two days back in February, Charlie had no idea where to look. She went to the bar where she met with him and Pike, then on to several bars popular with the cadets, and she even wandered down by Pier 39 to see if any of the bars there would be the type he would visit. She knew he was probably drinking; she wouldn't blame him if he was, but for the life of her she didn't know where!<p>

Slowly, a small nugget of doubt began to grow in her mind. How could she claim to be so close to Jim if, in his time of need, she had no idea where to find him? How could she claim that she made the right choice to stay when after six months, she was at a loss of what to do? Maybe she really didn't know him as much as she thought. If she lost Jim, she didn't know what would happen to her. He was her protector, her savior, and it terrified her to think that she could be left all alone in this new world.

Shaking her head in disgust, she attempted to remove such morose and dramatic thoughts from her mind. She had McCoy, and Uhura, and many of the others from the _Enterprise_ as her friends, and with Pike now an important part of her life, she would never be alone. Her life had just been turned on its head, and that caused the despairing ideas to come to the foreground of her mind; the fight with Jim not helping matters.

After turning up nothing, the sun having long since set, Charlie headed to the one place she was sure she'd find the answer to her problem. The local clinic on the Starfleet campus was quiet that night as she stepped through the wide double doors. Nurses in bright white outfits wandered from room to room while patients were rolled around in wheelchairs and beds. Glancing around the main entrance, she couldn't see what she was looking for and stopped a passing nurse. Pointing down the right hall, Charlie thanked the young woman and hurried through the pristine foyer, down the hall, through a pair of doors and up to the third floor.

She found the office quickly enough and hit the call button, hearing a crash and a curse.

"Go away!" the voice shouted, and Charlie couldn't help but smirk and shake her head. Entering the code that he had given her a while ago, the door slid open and she walked in to find McCoy down on his knees cleaning up a broken vial.

"Issues, Doc?" she asked, her hands on her hips.

"Oh, it's you," McCoy said gruffly, standing up and dumping the contents of the dustpan in the trash.

"Well hello to you too."

"What can I do for you, Spitfire?" McCoy asked, ignoring her last sarcastic response.

Letting her arms drop with a sigh, she plopped down in the big, comfortable chair in the corner near the pile of PADDs waiting to be read by the surly doctor. "I need your help," she said, picking up one and glancing at the title, _Diseases of 21__st__ and 22__nd__ century America_. Dropping it back on the stack, she glanced up noting the perplexed stare of the doctor. His hip was leaning against the desk, and his arms were crossed while waited for her to continue. "With Jim."

Rolling his eyes, McCoy turned saying, "I'm a doctor, Charlie, not a relationship coach. If you have a problem with Jim, you need to talk to him about it."

"Well I would, but I can't find him," she admitted.

"What do you mean you 'can't find him'?" McCoy barked.

Rolling her eyes, Charlie explained, "We had a minor fight this morning and he stormed out. I haven't been able to find him since." Taking a pause, she added, "He lost the _Enterprise_, Len. It's gone."

McCoy swore, leaning onto his desk as he shook his head. "Damn Kid went and stirred up all the roosters," he grumbled.

Charlie nodded sadly. "Spock had some kind of role with it. I didn't get the full story, but Jim didn't tell the admiralty about Nibiru and Spock did. When I agreed with Spock's choice, Jim got a little mad."

"Oh I bet he did," the doctor said, plopping down in his chair. "Not that I don't agree, but you kind of kicked the man while he was down."

"I know," she sighed. "And I realized it about five minutes after he left. I tried to rush out and find him, but apparently he moves quick when he wants too. I'm pretty sure I've gone to every bar within the Bay Area."

"What makes you think he's at a bar?" Charlie just shot McCoy a look. "Okay, you're right. I'd probably be on my way to a bad hangover, too. Have you checked all the ones around campus? That's usually where he would go on his off days."

"I searched them all, McCoy," she sighed exasperated. "I just don't know where to look now."

"Did you, and I know this is probably a new idea for your ancient mind, try to call him?" McCoy asked sarcastically.

"Twice," she snapped. "He didn't pick up either time."

"What about the dive bar behind the Port of San Francisco?" he asked after a moment of quiet thinking. "It's to the right and the entrance is under the pier."

"No, because I didn't even know there was a bar there," Charlie said sitting up further. "Did Jim go there a lot?"

"As much as any other place," McCoy shrugged. "But he usually liked that place the best, especially when he was upset about something."

Charlie quickly jumped up, grabbing her purse that she had dropped near the chair. "Thanks, McCoy! I owe you a round!"

"Make that three!" the doctor shouted as Charlie sprinted out the door. Shaking his head, McCoy turned back to his work, but a nagging in his head had him sitting back with sigh. Kirk losing his ship was going to pull on him more than Charlie realized. He only hoped that the kid could figure something out before Jim reverted to his old ways, shoving Charlie out in the process.

She had thrown her purse onto her shoulder the minute she out the door of McCoy's office, and she distantly heard the request for three rounds. Charlie smirked as she took the stairs two at a time, wanting to hurry toward the place McCoy had mentioned. She exited the clinic through the same wide, glass doors, rushing across Starfleet's main campus toward the center of San Francisco. She only hoped that Jim was where McCoy had suggested, otherwise she was just going to have to go back to apartment and wait for him, something she was not particularly keen to do.

As she hurried thru the night, a commotion drew Charlie's attention toward the two main towers of Starfleet Headquarters. Near the very top of the structure hovered a vehicle, gently swinging back and forth around a set of windows. It was small, only about the size of a car and a compact one at that. Charlie slowed as she drew nearer to the building, squinting up as she tried to focus on what it was doing above her. To her horror, she realized it was _shooting_ into the Starfleet building, pieces of broken glass and plaster raining down on the unsuspecting personnel on the ground floor.

All thoughts of finding Jim vanished from Charlie's thoughts as she sprinted over to the large fountain that gurgled outside the main entrance. Some people had gathered there, staring up in the same horror Charlie felt a moment ago. What they had yet to process was the amount of debris that rained down on their heads, especially when that machine was shot down.

"Hey!" she shouted, gaining the attention of those closest to her. "You need to move! Get these people out of the way of the debris!"

Her shout seemed to have snapped some of the security out of their astonishment. With firm orders, they began pushing people back away from the building and out of range of the raining projectiles. Some had already been hit, and Charlie rushed to drag them out of reach, pulling one man's arm around her shoulders as she hauled him to safety. Women were crying, and others could only watch as they backed away, their eyes wide in terror while beams of green light continued into the room above. Glancing around at those surrounding her, Charlie was surprised by her indifference to the situation, having seen far worse in her lifetime already. Hell, she had been kidnapped by Klingons; this was a cakewalk to that. She did notice a subtle shaking in her hands, and her forehead was beginning to break out in a sweat, but she did her best to ignore it

Beginning to buckle from the weight, she gently laid the man next to someone who had set up a quick triage center, expecting those in the room above to need assistance once the situation was under control. Above, the vehicle started to sputter, smoke pouring out as it began a death spiral. Charlie glanced up as it crashed into the floor below the destroyed room before falling out the window straight toward the fountain mere feet from her. Charlie's arm came up to protect her face as she blocked the man with her body when the vehicle landed and pieces flew off in different directions. She could feel the small shrapnel cut into her arm and some nicked her forehead with stinging accuracy as they flew past.

She stood and rushed to the craft, only to find no one inside. She glanced upwards just as the San Francisco police flew in on their own shuttles, noticing a few people standing near the now gaping hole in the side of the building. Whipping away the small drop of blood that ran down the side of her face, Charlie's attention moved back to the craft as she noticed something interesting inside before the police that had pulled up on scene drew her away.

Not knowing what else to do, Charlie began helping the injured toward EMTs and others with medical training. One of the first things Doctor McCoy taught her was field dressing onboard the _Enterprise_ and she put her skills to work. He said after everything she had been through, and what the _Enterprise_ was sure to experience while she was onboard, he felt it was a good skill to have. As she worked, blood and dirt found itself on her shirt and trousers, but her mind was wonderfully blank as she began helping staunch blood pouring from wounds, and wrap sprained ankles. Movement from the corner of her eye had Charlie glancing up. Her heart froze in her chest as she watched Jim stumble out of the main building, dirty and covered in small cuts just like her.

"Jim!" she shouted, standing up above those hunched around her. Jim snapped his head in her direction, his eyes widening when he caught sight of her.

"Charlie? Charlie!"

Without thinking, she ran towards him, leaping onto him when she was close enough and throwing her arms around his neck. He squeezed her, his head dipping into her shoulder before letting her go and holding her at arm's length. His eyes widened when he noticed the blood and grime.

"What are you doing here?!" he snapped, pulling her away from curious eyes. "Why aren't you at home?"

"I was looking for you!" she answered, spinning in front of him. "I've been looking all day for you. I even went to see your BFF for advice."

"BFF?" Jim voiced confused.

"Never mind," she muttered as she noticed his bloodshot eyes and the bruises. "What happened to you?"

"What happened to _me_? What happened to you? You're covered in blood."

"Don't worry, this isn't my blood," she said with a shrug. "I was helping those injured from falling debris coming from that attack." With panic beginning to grow in her chest, she choked, "Jim, were you in that room?"

Clenching his jaw, the muscle flexing so hard Charlie could see it in the semi dark he nodded. "There was an attack at an archive in London a few hours ago." She gasped, her hand covered her opened mouth as he continued, "They discovered one of Starfleet's own was behind it; someone named John Harrison. Senior command was called to discuss what our next plan of action was when we were attacked by him."

"Senior command? But I thought you lost the _Enterprise?_"

"Pike got it back and made me First Officer," Jim said, a deep pain gently sweeping over his visage.

"I knew he would look after you," she sighed, relieved. "Jim, I'm sorry about earlier. I hope you know that I'm always here to support you."

"It's fine, Charlie," he said, pulling her into him and clinging to her like a child.

"Jim, what's wrong?" she asked, gently pushing away from him after several moments. Something felt wrong with the situation now that she had time to calm and think rationally. "There's something you're not telling me."

Jim stayed quiet, his grief stricken blue gaze boring into her own, causing her heart to beat faster in sudden, unquenchable fear.

"Where's Pike and Spock? If it was senior command, then they were up there with you."

"Spock's fine. He's handling the coordination of the injured upstairs," Jim sighed, his eye's beginning to fill with tears, something she had never seen before. "Charlie, I tried. I tried to stop it before he took too many people out."

"Jim, what are you talking about?" she snapped, turning to run into the building, but he grabbed her arm, swinging her back around as he placed himself between her and the door. "Where's Pike? Where is he?!" she shouted panicked.

"He's . . . he's . . ."

"He's what?!" she yelled.

"He's gone."


	8. Chapter Eight: Brothers Under the Sun

**Chapter Eight: Brothers Under the Sun**

Charlie could only stand and stare, unable to comprehend what Jim had just told her. "'Gone.' What do you mean 'gone'?"

"He was killed, Charlie," Jim choked, his voice caked in emotion.

"What? No, no he can't, he can't be," Charlie denied, stumbling backwards as if struck, he eyes snapping upwards toward the broken windows and battered façade. "You're lying. Why are you lying to me!" It couldn't be true, it wasn't. Pike was a force, a man who could move mountains if he so desired. It wasn't possible that he was dead.

Charlie tried to brush past Jim, shoving him out of the way with all the force she had to enter the partially destroyed building, but he grabbed onto her shoulders and stopped her in her tracks. She could have tried to move a boulder for all the good it did her. In the back of her mind, she knew he didn't want her to see what he had: all the bodies and blood mixed with the debris and broken glass, but she had to know. She had to see for herself, to validate Jim's claim.

"I'm sorry, Charlie," he grunted as she continued to struggle against his hold.

"Then stop lying to me!" she shouted as she propelled him away, spinning away from him as her hand came up to rub her forehead, the tense muscles causing a headache to grow.

"I'm not lying to you," he insisted, standing between her and the door. "I wish I was. I wish this was a bad dream, but it's not."

Charlie searched the darkness, unwilling to believe what Jim told her. "How is it not?" she gasped, turning toward him again. "How can this be true? Let me in there and see for myself. Get out of my way, Jim."

"No, Charlie," Jim denied, sidestepping in front of her and grabbing her shoulders. "It's a mess up there. I'm sorry but the building's being quartered off."

Charlie twisted out of his grip, running a shaking hand through her tangled hair in agitation. "How could this have happened?" she wheezed.

Jim held his palms outward, the dirt and blood from above mixing with the sweat that ran down his face. "No one was smart enough to think Harrison would know protocol after the bombing. He attacked us in the middle of our meeting and Pike was hit with a plasma shot."

"Well, well maybe Pike's just unconscious," she tried to reason, attempting to get past Jim again hoping he was wrong. "Did you think of that? Maybe he just needs medical attention and he'll be fine. Where's Bones? We'll get him there. Remember what happened last time—"

"He's not unconscious, Charlie!" Jim barked as he reached up to give her shoulders a small shake. "He's gone, I saw it with my own eyes."

She shook her head, her tangled dark tresses flying around. "No. No, I don't believe you. I can't! This can't be happening. Please, tell me you're lying."

With the truth evident in his gaze, her knees grew weak and shaky, and before she could stop herself, Charlie crashed onto the concrete. Giant wails tore from her throat as she wrapped her arms around herself. Never in her whole life had she felt pain like that which stabbed at her heart. Her body was trembling with the force of her dry heaves, her arms holding her stomach as she rocked back and forth on her knees, unable to keep a reign on her emotions. Icy flooded her veins in a cold fire, and water poured from her eyes. Her mind went blank except for pain and she was only partially aware when Jim kneeled down and wrapped his arms around her frame. His fingers were buried in her tangled hair as he held her against his chest, offering the only comfort possible.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm so, so sorry."

Her arms embraced him while they held each other in their sorrow. She couldn't breathe. She was suffocating. Great gasps of air were drawn into her lungs and still she felt like she was drowning. She prayed he was wrong, but as the time continued forward, it became less and less probable that she was in a nightmare. She kept crying 'no' over and over, lightly pounding onto Jim's arm every time her wails peaked. She was trembling, and her head was feeling as if it wanted to explode from the pressure of her screams.

After a few more moments, Charlie began to calm as she got her breath under control and the tears ceased. She pulled back from Jim and wiped a hand across her hot cheeks.

"What are we going to do?" she whispered, her throat raw and unable to process how to manage the next few minutes.

"We're going to carry on," Jim muttered firmly. "We're going to find the bastard that did this and we're going to destroy him."

"Oh, we're going to more than destroy him," she growled, her shinning, amber eyes snapping to his as a fire Jim had never seen entered her gaze. "I want him to feel every inch of pain that we do right now. I want him to suffer as we are suffering; I want to break him."

Jim's brow rose in surprise. "Charlie—"

"No, Jim. I don't care if it isn't proper, or part of being a good person. I don't want to be a good person. I want that man's head on a spike."

"We're going to find him, I can promise you that," he reasoned, his fists clenched and shaking. "He'll see justice."

"'Justice'," she snorted. "I'd give him my time's kind of justice right now if that coward hadn't run."

Jim was again startled but the vehemence in her voice. "How do you know he ran?"

"I checked the ship after it crashed," she nodded toward the wreckage surrounded by the police and Starfleet as she shakily rose to her feet. "There was no body there. He must have run. That's the only thing that makes sense."

Jim paused a moment and nodded. "He transported out, I saw it when I was up there."

"Fucking coward," she barked, her hands clenched and relaxed as she considered pounding them in his flesh.

"Not how I'd put it, but you're right," he consented.

A wave of lightheadedness swept through Charlie and she leaned over, bracing herself on her knees and breathing through her nose as she felt her heart pound.

"Are you okay?" Jim asked concerned, his arms moving to support her.

"No, Jim, I'm not," she snapped, standing back up straight as the wave passed. "I want to go after Harrison right now. I want to find where he went and bring him back here, but I can't do that right now. So what do you want me to do? What _can_ I do?"

"Go home," Jim said, surprising the woman. "I have to go up to help set up the investigation and give my account; I only came out here to catch my breath. I'll meet you back at the apartment in hour, maybe two. I promise."

"But, I could be much more useful here," she argued. "I can go back to helping the injured or help with the investigation—"

"Charlie, you could have been hurt or even killed today," he interrupted as he gripped the sides of her face. "I didn't even know you were here, and it scares me that I could have lost you too. Just go home, for my piece of mind. I know you could help, but this one time, please do this for me."

Charlie searched his gaze a moment and saw something she never thought she'd see: fear. Her heart hammered in her chest as another swell of anguish rose, but Charlie nodded, reaching up to squeeze his wrist as she pushed the pain away. "Alright, fine I'll head home, but I expect you to follow soon. No excuses, Jim."

"I will. Charlie?" he added as she turned to walk away.

"Yes?" she asked glancing over her shoulder.

"I love you," he muttered, his shoulders slumped and his eyes rimmed with red.

Rushing forward, Charlie reached up and jerked his lips to hers, the warm wetness reminding the pair for their own life. Releasing him, she whispered, "I love you too. I'll wait for you at home."

He smiled sadly, brushing a lock of windswept hair behind her ear, before he headed back into the building. Taking a deep breath, Charlie turned toward the apartment, her steps heavy and her heart thundering in her chest. Giant ice picks drove into her heart, and she had to pause periodically to regain her composure. She couldn't remember how she was able to make it into the apartment, every step bled into one large marathon of emotional strife.

Once inside, Charlie leaned her back against the door to the apartment, feeling completed drained after the rollercoaster events from that day. Her head fell back and she slid down the door, her legs folding under her as she landed on the floor. She wiped a hand under her running nose as another wave of tears attempted to surface again. Charlie could not believe that Pike was gone, taken away in a single moment. She knew life could change in an instant, her current history testament to that, but losing Pike had never even entered her radar. She had just started to enjoy the sensation of having a father by her side, and now it gone faster than it began.

Unable to prevent the surge of raw emotion, Charlie found herself hyperventilating, her heart and lungs squeezed in vice grip, causing her to gasp in both panic and pain. Giant sobs bowled through her and she pounded her fists against the tile floor in anger, screams bouncing off the walls of the apartment. How could God be so cruel to finally give her a man willing to be her father, only to him ripped away? What travesty had she done to cause such a horrific event? What hurt worse for her was thinking of Jim; the man who never had a father. It wasn't fair to him to lose Pike, and that killed her even more.

She knew she should get up, to get herself under control because when Jim came home he was going to need her, but dammit if she was having issues pulling herself together. She trembled and bawled until her head felt swollen, reaching up to pull at her dark hair and begging to be saved from the misery in her soul.

After a few more moments, she focused on breathing through her nose to push the pain aside. She clenched her fists tight, her nails biting into her palm to the point she knew there would be marks. Slowly, she exhaled and released the tension in her hands; letting them rest before clenching her fists again. She did that for every part of her body until she finally felt a sense of fragile control, opening her crusty eyes to take in the darkened room.

Pike would want her to be strong. She didn't know where the thought came from, but it was true. He thought she was cut out to be a Starfleet officer; and for the rest of her life, she would prove him right. She slapped the tear from her cheeks and her throat was raw and sore. She slumped to her feet, and her knees shook as she stumbled over to the counter in the kitchen. Digging through the drawers, she found Jim's stash of whiskey and a glass. Pouring herself a shot, she raised the glass toward the ceiling.

"This one's for you," she toasted before swallowing the liquid. The fire burned her throat and she coughed, but the warming in her stomach was soothing against the rawness of her heart.

As she debated pouring herself another, the door to the apartment opened and Jim walked in, falling back against the closed door with a defeated sigh. He was still in his dirty and destroyed uniform, small marks still marring the sides of his head. His hand subtly shook as he reached up to wipe it down his face in exhaustion. Before he had moved from his place in the entryway, Charlie had already reached into the cabinet to pull out another glass.

"Hey soldier," she drawled, pouring one for him and another for herself. "Pull up a chair."

Jim shuffled his way to the island and plopped down into the chair with a great sigh. Charlie slid the glass of whiskey over to him, and he immediately swallowed the whole glass in one shot.

"Thanks," he mumbled, setting the empty tumbler on the counter. The clink of crystal on stone reverberated through the silent apartment, neither Charlie nor Jim wishing to disrupt the fragile calm.

Charlie braced her arms against the edge of the counter, her mind set adrift as she studied the small specks of gold and opal in the pale countertop. The silence of the room became deafening to her, but she dared not make a sound and disturb Jim. After the last few days, peace and quiet was what he needed.

Minutes passed and still neither voiced any of their thoughts; the only sounds in the apartment was their breathing and whatever filtered in from outside. Charlie was lost in thought as she calculated mindless equations in her head to keep calm while Jim fiddled with the glass.

"How are you doing?" Jim questioned, his voice thunderous after the long silence.

"Wishing I could get drunk, but knowing that's probably a bad idea," she confessed with a shrug.

Jim snorted, although no smiled graced his cheeks. "Yeah, me too."

"Are you okay?"

"I'd rather not talk about it," he retorted. He sat back against the back on the chair, his hand reaching up to rub his red and tired eyes.

Charlie blew out an exaggerated breath, her bangs flying up and out of her eyes. "I can't just stand here and do nothing. I can't Jim, this isn't in my nature but I have no idea what to do."

"They were just starting to take the forensics when I left," he told her, his head tilted back exposing his strong throat. "Until they get done with that, there isn't anything to do."

"That's bullshit," she snapped, slapping her hands down on the countertop and began to pace around the kitchen. "We could be finding where Harrison went. We could be tracking him down to bring him back to answer for what he did. Or just leave him in a room with me and a bunch of garden tools; that could work too."

"Charlie. . ." Jim sighed, exasperated.

"What? It's not like you haven't considered the thought."

"I've got Scotty working with the investigation surrounding his ship, and there are others that will inform me the minute they find something."

Charlie growled deep in her throat. "I'm going crazy, Jim. I just want to hit something, or cry, or scream. I want to rip his head from his body and put in on a spike in the middle of campus, but the very thought _exhausts_ me. I don't know which way is up right now."

"You think you're the only one who feels this way?" Jim snapped as he sat forward. "I was in the same damn room, and I did _nothing_. Yea, I was able to destroy his ship but it was too late; I figured it out _too late_. I could have saved them, I could have saved Pike and I didn't."

Charlie paused, her gaze morphing into contrition as she reached forward to grasp Jim's empty hand. "Jim, you're not superman. You can't stop everything from happening."

"Didn't you once say I was the hero? Aren't heroes supposed to save the day?"

"Yes I did," she consented. "But heroes also have their dark moments; they can't save everyone."

"Oh please," he scoffed, pulling his hand back and crossing his arms.

"No really," she insisted, more force laced in her voice. "Didn't Arthur lose Lancelot and Guinevere? Didn't Hercules kill his wife and children? How many men did Hrothgar loose before Beowulf defeated Grendel? Every story has a point where it slides into darkness."

"Is that what you're telling yourself?" Jim growled, pushing himself off the chair as he stormed off toward the bedroom. As he walked, he loosened the neck of his uniform and pulled it over his head. "This isn't a story, Charlie. This is reality."

"I understand that," she maintained as she followed. "But life is full of dark times too. You and I know this better than most. These moments are when we remember what we do have. It's you and me, Jim; to the bitter end, and at least we still have that."

He braced himself against the chest of drawers, the shirt of his uniform thrown to the side and his shoes kicked off. "I want him back, Charlie," he whispered, sorrow cracking his voice. "I just want him back."

"I do too," she answered as she hurried over and wrapped her arms around his torso, leaning her cheek against his strong back. The soft warmth of his black shirt was soothing and she closed her eyes, inhaling his scent. His hand reach up to grasp her wrapped arms, his head tilted back to rest on top of hers.

"I don't know how I could have handled this if you weren't here," he confessed. He spun and drew her into his chest, squeezing her until it was almost painful.

"You would have survived, just like you always have," she mumbled into his chest. "But I'm glad I am here for you. We'll get through this; somehow, someway, we will." She felt him nod as he released her, surreptitiously wiping his eyes while he dropped his Starfleet pin on the dresser. "Come on. Let's go to bed," she suggested. "My grandmother always said even the most hopeless night finds serenity in the morning."

"You go ahead. I couldn't sleep right now even if I tried. I'll try to come in later." He reached to stroke her cheek, but she could tell he was distracted. His eyes were unfocused as he stumbled around her, picking up a couple PADDs and heading towards the living room. Left alone in the cold room, Charlie collapsed onto the edge of the bed, the sheets still ruffled from their activities earlier that morning. She let her head fall into her hands as she breathed a great sigh. She was exhausted, emotionally, physically, and mentally with really no idea how to help herself, let alone Jim. A single tear fell onto her knee, her eyes too red and dry to form more. Lying back onto the rumpled bed, she let her brain shut down as her body folded into the mattress. Within moments she was asleep, her world finally at an illusion of peace.

* * *

><p>When Jim came back in an hour later, he found her curled on her side, a pale hand tucked under her cheek as dark lashes gently shifted in her dreaming. He pulled a soft blanket up to her shoulders, brushing a stray strand of dark hair from her face. He still couldn't sleep, the horrific images of flying glass, red lights, and green plasma kept flashing every time he closed his eyes. For the rest of the night, he was only able to catch a few catnaps, but nothing as regenerating as the deep sleep Charlie seemed to have found. She had barely moved from the position he found her in, and if he hadn't know better, he would have thought she was dead to the world as well.<p>

Finally, as the light of dawn began to break into the bedroom, Jim sat up and ran a hand through his ruffled hair, pulling it down his face to wipe away to bone deep tiredness in his body. He hadn't changed out of his uniform from yesterday, and glancing back at Charlie who was still asleep next to him, neither had she.

For the next few hours while the light of the sun gradually warmed the bedroom, Jim sat next to Charlie, working on his PADD as he analyzed any information he could to try to find John Harrison and a motive behind his attack. He knew he could have gone to the living room, leaving the sleeping girl in peace, but he didn't want to leave her side. Even in the earliest hours of the morning, when she was doing nothing more than breathing deeply, she kept him calm and centered. She was his rock, just as he was hers, and although they were still figuring out their relationship, he couldn't remember what it was like without her. He never thought he would have found love like that shared between the two of them, but now that he had, he didn't want to lose it for anything in the universe.

Slowly Charlie awoke, shuffling around as if she were trying to fall back to sleep, but she opened her crusty, sand filled eyes, wincing from the impact of the harsh sun.

"Please tell me it was a dream," she mumbled into her pillow.

"I wish it was," Jim answered with a rough sigh.

"I woke up and for a moment had forgotten," she said, shoving the blanket off, and rubbing her burning eyes. "I'd forgotten what had happened and I felt so light. But then I remembered, like a bad dream. God, why did I have to remember?"

Jim didn't know what to say, only to reach his arm around her and lay a gentle kiss on her forehead. "I'm going to go take a quick shower," she mumbled, surreptitiously wiping her eyes again. Jim nodded, and watched as she shuffled her way around the bed towards the bathroom. She had just closed the door when Jim's communicator began beeping loudly, alerting the former captain to an incoming call.

"Yeah?" he answered, his voice deadpanned as he continued to stare at the door to the bathroom.

"Commander," Spock's calm, authoritative voice wafted through the room. "Mr. Scott has found something in the wreckage of Harrison's ship. He has asked to see us right away."

"I'll grab Charlie and we'll be right there," he answered, his heart racing as he stood and ran into the bathroom. Finally, they had something.

* * *

><p>Their boots pounded on the stone as they ran through the campus of Starfleet, Charlie having thrown on a quick pair of jeans and one of Jim's Starfleet sweatshirts after he had burst into the bathroom to tell her Scotty found something. The pair found Spock, and hurried toward the rendezvous point where Scotty said to meet him. The man was just arriving, his arms full of some type of machine part.<p>

"Captain!" Scotty shouted when he noticed the trio, thrusting the device into Jim's arms. "I found this in the crashed jumpship, sir. This is how the bastard got away."

"What do you mean?" Jim asked, barely able to get a grip.

"It's a portable transwarp beaming device."

"Well can you figure out where he went?"

"I already did, Sir," Scotty said. "And you're no gonna like it. He's gone to the one place we . . . we jus' can't go." Scotty hit a few buttons and four numbers - - flashed across the small screen. Jim's jaw flexed as he grounded his teeth in agitation while Spock's brow furrow ever so slightly and his eyes narrowed in anger.

"Where?" she voiced confusedly, glancing between the three men. "What do those numbers mean?"

"Those are the coordinates of Qo'nos, the Klingon home world," Spock announced.

Charlie felt her heart drop in chest like a stone. "What?" she gasped, unable to prevent the stumble of steps backwards as if burned by the device.

"Charlie, stay with Scotty," Jim shouted as he and Spock began running toward the main building, throwing the machine back into Scotty's arms. "Spock and I need to talk to Marcus."

"I—" It was too late, they were already gone.

Turning to look at the Scotsman, he could only shrug and say, "Want to go get a pint?"


	9. Chapter Nine: This is Where I Belong

**Thank you everyone for your wonderful reviews! They truly make writing this epic more fun than it already is. I hope you all enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Nine: This is Where I Belong<strong>

Half an hour after his meeting with Marcus, Jim pushed the door open and stepped into a local café, the bell chiming somewhere in the shop just above the din of the voices. He scanned the tabled and found Scotty and Charlie occupying two plush chairs in the corner, both chatting over their teacups while they waited for him to arrive. Threading around the cramped coffee shop, he maneuvered his way over to the pair attempting to draw as little attention as possible.

"Hey," Charlie greeted as she glanced up from her cup. "How'd it go?" she asked, setting the cup down and leaning forward in anticipation. Charlie was surprised by her the level of her patience waiting for the captain, but Scotty knew the best ways to distract her .

"Fine," Jim answered, his shifting around at the different patrons. "C'mon Charlie," he gestured. "We need to head back to the apartment. Mr. Scott, report to the _Enterprise_ as soon as you are able. We'll be heading out in a few hours."

"Aye, Captain," Scotty nodded as Jim pulled Charlie up, guiding her through the throngs of people toward the door.

"Jim!" she exclaimed, ripping her arm out of his hand the minute they were outside. "What the hell?!"

"Sorry," he apologized, his hand moving to her lower back and guided her away from the café back towards his flat. "But what I have to tell you can't be heard by just anyone. I'm breaking a lot of rules just telling you now."

Charlie peeked uncertainly in his direction, weaving around those on the streets. "What is it?" she said, her steps matching his hurried rhythm. "What's going on?"

"Wait," Jim ordered. Once they were out of the crowds and on the unoccupied sidewalk leading to the residences he finally explained the situation. "We confirmed Harrison's in the Ketha province on Qo'nos; it's uninhabited so he has that going for him."

"What do you mean?"

"According to relevant sources, Harrison belonged to a secret organization called Section 31, headed by Marcus."

"Section 31?" Charlie paused, confused. "I've never heard of that."

"Well no you wouldn't. I've never even heard of it."

The firm pressure on her back restarted Charlie's trek back to the apartment as Jim kept glancing around them. "That's not what I meant," she mumbled. "Never mind, what did they do? Covert ops, technology advancement, what?"

"Marcus said they were using Harrison to develop advanced weaponry for defensive purposes, but he went rogue for some reason."

"How advanced are we talking?" She stopped again, turning to face Jim in the lobby of the apartment building. What Jim was telling her didn't sound like the Starfleet she knew and loved. "You don't think Sagan brought someone from the future back with him, do you?"

"I don't think so, no," Jim assured, hitting the button for the lift. "What he developed was a long range, untraceable photon torpedo. It's advanced, but nothing like we'd expect from someone who'd have that much knowledge."

She pulled her lip between her teeth, her brow furrowed as she listened to him. Once the door opened, Charlie followed Jim onto the lift, leaning against the rail as she tried to wrap her brain around the thought of a Starfleet secret organization. "I don't like this. I don't like how it sounds. Why would Starfleet need defensive weapons, and why do it so secretly?"

"Marcus is under the impression that the Klingons or the Romulans are itching for a fight. After what Sagan tried to do, and the fallout with Nero, he may have a point."

"Still," she argued, lost in thought as she walked down the hallway crewing on her thumbnail. She nodded her thanks as Jim held the apartment door open for her before she paced toward the brightly lit bedroom. "It's like the whole nuclear deterrent idea of my century. Like seriously, has Marcus learned nothing of history? Oh yes, let's build everything up and show how big we are, because that won't stop anyone from pushing our buttons," she added sarcastically. "And you know, now that I'm thinking about it, Marcus was really interested in defensive strategies from my family."

"What do you mean?" Jim asked. He reached into the closet to remove his bag, changing into his travel uniform before hastily shoving clothes and toiletries in the bag.

"It was something that he said," she confessed, sitting on the bed cross-legged. "He kept making references to military battles my family was in, and how I was more adept at fighting a war because I was used to it. Things like that."

"But you didn't, your parents and siblings did."

"That's what I told him."

Jim paused, his hands going onto his hips as his stare went out the window towards the towers where they were just beginning the repairs. "Why would he ask that of you?"

"I don't know," she confessed with a sigh. "I've been trying to figure it out. Pike was too."

"We're going to get the bastard, Charlie," Jim assured. His eyes were hardened steel, and while his shoulders had been bowed and weak that morning, they were now squared and strong like a bow. "I promise. I've been given the _Enterprise_ back, and we've been authorized to test out a few of those torpedoes on Harrison. He won't know what'll hit him."

Charlie disentangled her body, sitting forward on the bed as Jim finished grabbing his communicator and Starfleet pin. This was it; her one chance. "Take me with you," she appealed, rising her feet, her eyes never leaving him.

"What?" His eyes snapped to hers in surprise. Charlie balked by the intensity she found on them, but she knew there was no turning back now.

"You heard me. Take me with you, don't leave me here."

Jim lingered, his head dipping as he sighed. "I can't."

"Why not?"

"You're not Starfleet," he pointed out.

"So? You know I'm smart enough to be. After all, it was _my_ battle plan we used against the Klingons."

"Your intelligence was never in question Charlie, but I can't allow you onboard," his hands were flexing and he was bouncing on his toes. "The review board could see it as an act of aggression, and that could stop you from coming back permanently."

"Fuck the review board," she snapped, scrambling around him to block his path as he headed towards the door. "Pike became a father to me, just as he was to you. I know how much this is killing you, because I know what it's doing to me. Let me come with you, even if it's just for the support. You look like hell."

"Thanks," he muttered sarcastically. "Charlie I can't, I'm sorry." He tried to skirt around her, tugging on the jacket of his travel uniform as he did so.

"Then make me an acting ensign, and bring me on that way," she reasoned, sidestepping in front of him again.

"What are you talking about?"

With a quick breath to settle her nerves, she confessed, "I was already planning on joining Starfleet after I was released and I wanted to talk to you about it, but then other things came up. Pike was going to sponsor my application, actually." She gazed up through her lashes, tugging on her bottom lip with her teeth. "Please, make me an acting ensign for this mission; you have the power to do so."

"Charlie—"

"I will not give up," she vowed. Her eyes narrowed and she placed her hands on her hips. "You can't leave me behind. Not like this. Not again. I will not be the obedient little woman who waits behind while you go off to battle. Not when I know I could help. That's not who I am, and that's not how this relationship works. You know where I come from and what I'm capable of. You know my family. I can do this. Please, Jim."

Jim stared hard into Charlie's unwavering gaze. She stood resolute, unflinching and stanch and it was the first time in a very long time that he saw a purpose behind her stance. "If I say you can come, will you move so that we don't miss the shuttle to the _Enterprise_. As Captain, that wouldn't look good for either of us."

Charlie blinked, not moving a muscle. Once she realized that Jim was serious, she split into a wide, toothy grin, jumping to wrap her arms around Jim's neck and pulling her lips to his. "Thank you," she grinned, feeling lighter than air for the first time in forty-eight hours. "I promise I won't let you down, _Captain._"

"I know you won't, Ensign Noland," he said, her grin infectious. "Now let's go. We need to get you a uniform before we head up to the _Enterprise_."

"Aye, aye, Sir," she smiled.

* * *

><p>The hangar bay was bustling with activity, the normal operations of the day-to-day traffic buzzing around Jim like a beehive. He hurried toward the shuttle that would take him back to his ship, and from there to seek justice against the man who killed the only father figure Kirk had known. He had dropped Charlie off earlier at the quartermaster with specific orders to outfit her as an ensign and to have her join him on the shuttle as soon as possible. His thoughts were two steps ahead as he walked, already on the tasks he needed to accomplish back on the bridge when a familiar voice called out his name.<p>

"Jim! Where were you?"

The captain glanced over his shoulder and saw his CMO hurrying to catch up. "For what?" Jim asked as McCoy fell into step beside him, the doctor more agitated than his normal state.

"Your medical exam," the doctor explained as if it was the most obvious thing. "Ten hours ago you were in a damn firefight. Now it's my duty as ship's doctor—"

"I'm fine, Bones," Jim interrupted.

"The hell you are," McCoy growled, grabbing the captain's arm and preventing him from entering the shuttle. "I'm sure you're just as fine as Charlie was after Sagan."

Kirk paused, his thoughts going back to the weeks following Charlie's return to him. "I'm fine," he reassured, spinning on his heel and leaping up the steps into the shuttle.

McCoy stood there a moment, growling to himself and his knuckleheaded captain when Charlie appeared next to him, adjusting her new uniform and pulling wisps of hair back into her low ponytail, unaware of his presence.

"Charlie! What are you doing here?"

Glancing up startled, Charlie grinned and said," It's Acting Ensign Noland right now, Doctor."

"Acting ensign?"

"That's right," she reaffirmed, jogging up the steps of the shuttle with McCoy right behind her. She could barely contain her excitement, knowing that she would have a direct impact on avenging Pike filled her with purpose. "I want justice for what that man did to Pike, McCoy; just like Jim. The only way I could get that was to be a part of Starfleet for this mission. So here I am."

Inside, they heard Spock addressing the captain who had already taken his seat and was reviewing the specs of their mission on his PADD. "— should be ready for launch by the time we arrive."

Interrupting the Vulcan, McCoy stopped next to the captain and barked, "Jim, you let her join?" He pointed back to Charlie who was standing behind him, having been shoved out of the way by the CMO in his mad dash to confront Kirk.

"She really gave me no choice," Kirk grumbled.

"Miss Noland, you are now a member of Starfleet?" Spock asked, his head tilting to the side in his confusion.

"Yes, Sir," Charlie said, subconsciously standing at attention. "Acting ensign, Commander. Brought on to assist this mission."

Spock's brow rose in surprise as Charlie and McCoy took their seats behind the Captain and the Vulcan.

"Do you believe this wise, Captain?" Spock asked, taking his seat. "Ensign Noland has had no formal training at the Academy."

"I've had training with Admiral Pike," Charlie explained, sitting forward. "Before—"

"She's fine," Jim interrupted, no argument to be brokered in his voice as McCoy began running his tricorder over his head. "Her skills and qualifications are perfectly adequate for this mission."

Nodding, Spock continued, "I would like to thank you for requesting my reinstatement, Captain."

"You're welcome."

"As I am again your First Officer, it is now my duty to strongly object to our mission parameters."

"Of course it is," Kirk groaned.

"Commander, that man killed several members of Starfleet's highest command and then fled like some coward to the Klingons," Charlie pointed out. "He's getting off easy in my opinion."

"There is no Starfleet regulation that condemns a man to die without a trial," Spock argued, glancing back at Charlie. "Something you, Captain Kirk, and Admiral Marcus are forgetting. Also, preemptively firing torpedoes at the Klingon home world goes against every—"

"You yourself said the area's uninhabited," Kirk interjected. "There's only going to be on casualty. And in case you weren't listening our orders have nothing to do with Starfleet regulation."

"Wait a minute. We're firing torpedoes at the Klingons?" McCoy sputtered.

"You didn't know?" Charlie glanced at the doctor is surprise. She had thought that Jim informed him of the mission parameters; something she and Spock were already briefed on.

"No! Is he cotton-picking mad?" McCoy growled as the argument between Spock and Kirk escalated.

Charlie scoffed, waving her hand in the air dismissively, "Harrison is in an uninhabited area of Qo'nos and our torpedoes are untraceable." She paused, her gaze flickering to the floor as her fingers wrapped around each other in her lap. "That man killed Pike, Doctor. It's the least he deserves."

"I don't think firing torpedoes at him would constitute an easy way out," McCoy growled, glancing back as the device in his hand as it started beeping loudly. "Whoa, Jim, calm down."

"I'm not going to take ethics lessons from a robot!" Kirk snapped.

"Reverting to name-calling suggests that you are defensive and therefore find my opinion valid," Spock reasoned.

"I wasn't asking for your opinion. Bones, get that thing off my face." McCoy rolled his eyes as he dropped his hand and the sensor in it.

"Captain, our mission could start a war with the Klingons and it is, by its very definition, immoral."

"What about the actions the Klingons have done, Commander?" Charlie glared at the stubborn Vulcan head. "What about the actions of Harrison?"

"Is there not a human proverb that two wrong actions do not make a right?"

"No, but like my grandmother always said three lefts do," she remarked before she could think.

Spock spun in his head, his full, penetrating gaze directed onto Charlie, the barest hint of annoyance in their dark depths. "That kind of remark will not be tolerated, Ensign. I am your commanding officer and will expect a certain level of respect."

Pursing her lips and the heat rising in her cheeks she muttered, "Apologies, Commander."

"Perhaps you both should take the requisite time to arrive at the conclusion for yourself." Spock sat forward, and pulled down the front of his jacket to smooth it out, looking straight ahead in finality.

Charlie shook her head and rolled her eyes as she turned to stare out the window. Spock just couldn't understand what it felt like for Jim and her to experience the loss they had.

As she sat there fuming, a soft lilting English accent spoke hesitantly, "Captain Kirk." Charlie and Jim snapped their attention up, taking stock of the petite blonde smiling at Jim. "Science Officer Wallace," she continued. "I've been assigned to the _Enterprise_ by Admiral Marcus. These are my transfer orders." She handed the transfer PADD to Jim, who scanned the information on Wallace.

Something about the woman set the hair on Charlie's head to rise. She couldn't place why she appeared familiar to her, having never set eyes on her until that day. Maybe it was Dr. Wallace's perfect smile, or the way she continued to stare at Jim with something other than the respect of a commanding officer, but Charlie didn't like the woman. It was an innate, instinctual dislike that surprised her with the vehemence of it. The name Carol sent the largest of warning flags to flash for Charlie, but her fuddled, grieving brain couldn't place why.

"You requested an additional science officer, Captain?" Spock inquired, his brows drawn in confusion and bringing Charlie back to the present.

"I wish I had," Kirk snidely replied. "'Lieutenant Carol Wallace. Doctorate in applied physics specializing in . . . advanced weaponry."

"Impressive credentials," Spock approved.

"Thank you."

"But redundant now that I am back aboard the _Enterprise_," he added.

"And yet the more the merrier. Have a seat, Doctor."

Charlie barely repressed a snarl as the woman took a satisfying seat in-between Spock and Kirk.

The rumbling under her feet signaled the shuttle was beginning to take off, the lights of the hangar bay changing that reflected through the windows. Leaning over towards McCoy who was busy inputting the details he gathered on Jim, Charlie mumbled, "I have a bad feeling about this."

"You and me both, Spitfire," he agreed.

Charlie continued to grumble to herself as the shuttle flew toward the _Enterprise,_ but the minute the magnificent ship came into view of her window, much of Charlie's ire dissipated. She had of course missed Jim and the crew, but she didn't realize how much she missed the ship until her gaze captured the white hull and long nacelles. It was her home, and from the minute she stepped onto her transporter pad Charlie was hooked. She smiled softly as the lights from space dock played off its shining hull.

Soon they were docked, everyone onboard the shuttle releasing their safety belts and rising from their seats. Kirk was one of the first out the door; McCoy standing aside so Charlie could scramble to his side.

"In a rush, Sir?" she teased.

"Just want to get to the bridge," he responded.

"I'm not going to lie, I didn't expect to return the Enterprise like this," she noted, glancing around at the activity on the ship as they hurried through the cargo bay.

Jim sighed next to her, his knuckles white clutching his PADD. "Neither did I. I wish it could have been different."

She glanced at him from the corner of her eye. "The important thing is I am here, Jim," she consoled. "And I will do everything I can to help you."

Although he didn't turn to address her, his steps increasing in speed when the group heard Scotty shouting in the distance, he did smile and sent a wink towards her.

Coming around the corner, Charlie saw Scotty and an official from Starfleet deliveries having a somewhat heated discussion around a long tubular device. Charlie assumed it was one of the specialty torpedoes they were going to use against Harrison, and from the argument shouted by the Scotsman she appeared to be right.

"No I'm not signing anythin'," Scotty growled. "Now get these bloody things off my ship! Captain!"

"Is there a problem, Mr. Scott?" Kirk asked, the others coming to stand around the pair except for Carol Marcus who began surveying the missile furtively. Charlie narrowed her eyes at the woman, trying to ignore the grumbling doctor next to her.

"Aye, Sir," Scotty said, scowling at the captain. "I was just explaining to this gentleman that I cannae authorize any weapons on board this ship without knowing what's inside them."

"Mr. Scott raises yet another point—"

"Report to the bridge," Kirk interrupted Spock, handing him his PADD.

Spock frowned at the man before doing as ordered. "Captain."

Turning back to his Chief of Engineering, Jim said, "Mr. Scott, I understand your concerns, but we need these torpedoes on board."

"Due respect, sir, but photon torpedoes run on fuel," Scotty explained. "Now I cannae detect the type of fuel that's in the compartments on these torpedoes because it's shielded. Now I asked for the specifications, but he said . . ."

"It's classified," the official answered when Scotty pointed back at him.

"It's classified! So I said, 'No specs, no signature!'"

Smirking, Charlie leaned over to McCoy and whispered, "I guess some things never change."

"Bureaucratic nonsense? Yep, we still got it," McCoy answered, his brows furrowed while continued to scan the readings on his PADD.

"Now if you'll excuse me, sir, I have a warp core to prime," Scotty said, turning his back on the others and stomping down a side hallway. "Get down!" he yelled at Keesner on his way by another torpedo.

"Jim, your vitals are way off," McCoy muttered, gaining the attention of the frustrated Captain.

"Report them to medbay. Charlie, go with him," Kirk ordered. "Scotty!" he yelled, chasing after the redshirted Scotsman.

McCoy sighed, his shoulder's dropping as he shook his head. "Guess you're with me, Spitfire. C'mon. Let's get you a normal uniform."

Charlie stared after Jim and Scotty, her lip between her teeth and her brow drawn in confusion. She had never seen Scotty act as he had, especially towards Jim. While they were all taking the death of Admiral Pike hard, the last thing anyone needed was to direct their ire towards each other.

"Spitfire!" McCoy called when he noticed Charlie hadn't followed. "Ensign!" he shouted, finally catching her attention. "C'mon." She nodded and hurried over to the surly doctor, following him into the turbolift and up to the medbay.

"You okay?" McCoy asked as the silence in the lift lengthened.

"What?" Charlie asked, her gaze flickering to his. "Yea, sorry," she muttered shuffling her feet and clasping her hands in front of her. "Just lost in my head for a bit. I don't really know what I'm supposed to be doing. Jim ran off before he could tell me."

The doors of the turbolift opened, admitting the pair to the bustling medical center. Nurses were rushing about, setting storage cabinets, preparing emergency kits while the doctors under McCoy saw the minor injuries already coming in as everyone worked to ready the ship for launch.

"Well for now, I'll get you a red uniform, since we aren't sure where you're going to be. . ." McCoy paused when Charlie came to a sudden stop, her eyes wide as saucers. "What?" he asked.

"Can I please wear another color?"

"What, why?" he barked, his hands moving to his hips.

"I have my reasons," she answered, shifting her weight from foot to foot.

"Which are? Spitfire, you better be telling me what's going through that head of yours."

"I can't—"

"Now, Ensign," he ordered.

Charlie pursed her lips and stood at attention, her palms lying flat against her thighs. "Haven't you noticed that whenever an away team beams down, or there's a catastrophe on the ship, the red shirts are always the first to die?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Haven't you ever noticed it before?"

"That's the—"

"Maybe it's a silly superstition," Charlie agreed, ignoring his interjection. "But until I am assigned a red uniform by the captain, I would like to request another color."

McCoy stared Charlie down, as if he tried to decide whether she was playing a joke. The sincerity in her gaze, however, indicated that she was serious. When she gave no sign she would back down, he shook his head, mumbling under his breath. "Alright, fine. Yellow then, you superstitious woman. Will that make you happy?"

Charlie relaxed, bouncing over to McCoy and her arms moving to behind her back. "Thanks, Doc. I owe you one."

"Aren't we up to four now?" McCoy pointed out as he guided her into his office and headed over to the replicator.

"Well I'd rather owe it you, than cheat you out of it," she smirked, her smile widening when McCoy rolled his eyes.

"Here, Spitfire," he said, tossing the dress to Charlie. "Get changed. I'll meet you out in the medbay."

* * *

><p>She had just tugged the dress into place, annoyed by the shortness of the ensemble when a ping for a ship wide announcement rang. Charlie paused, and turned toward the screen behind McCoy's chair. Jim's face came onto the display, looking more haggard than when they had parted a half hour before.<p>

"Attention, crew of the _Enterprise_," he said. "As most of you know, Christopher Pike, former captain of this ship and our friend, is dead. The man who killed him has fled our system and his hiding on the Klingon homeworld, somewhere he believes we are unwilling to go. We are on our way there now. Per Admiral Marcus, it is essential that our presence go undetected. Tensions between the Federation and the Klingon Empire have been high, as we have already experienced. Any provocation could lead to an all-out war."

He paused, and Charlie watched as a decision clicked in his head, turning toward something behind him. Her held tiled to the side as she walked closer to the screen. "I will personally lead a landing party to an abandoned city on the surface of Qo'nos where we will capture the fugitive, John Harrison, and return him to Earth so he can face judgment for his actions. Alright, let's go get this son of a bitch. Kirk out."

"God dammit," she swore.

* * *

><p>Review please! Let me know how you think it's progressing. It is going to follow STID, but it will have my own scenes added in. Thanks for reading!<p> 


	10. Chapter Ten: Nothing I've Ever Known

**Chapter Ten: Nothing I've Ever Known**

Charlie tugged her bottom lip between her teeth and her eyes narrowed in fury while she waited for the turbolift to bring her to the bridge. The minute Kirk's transmission ended, she sprinted out of the medbay, much to McCoy's confusion, and caught the first lift she came across towards the bridge. She couldn't decide whether she was livid or betrayed by the change in the ship's mission, but the anger was winning out. The doors hissed opened, pulling her from her thoughts and she made to step off only to pause when she remembered protocol.

"Permission to come on the bridge," she announced, her hands wringing behind her back as she waited. She saw Jim's chair spin towards her, Spock standing to his left when both their attention turned in her direction.

"Permission granted, Ensign Noland," Jim said as she strode around the communication station and down to his chair. "What can I do for you?"

"Can I speak with you privately, Captain? In your ready room?" While her voice was pleasant, there was steel in her eyes and her breathing was rapid and shallow. Jim stared at her a moment, his brow lifted in confusion before he nodded and rose from the chair.

"You have to conn, Spock," he said as he marched over to his office with Charlie on his heels.

The minute the doors closed, she stopped and asked, "Permission to speak candidly."

"Granted," he answered, his brows drawn in perplexity as he spun around to face her, leaning his hip against his desk as his arms folded in front of his wide chest. "When we're in private, you don't have to be all formal, Charlie."

"Okay, well that's good to know. So then, are you out of your mind?!" she growled. "Why in god's name are you bringing that _monster_ onto this ship?"

"And the yellow looks good on you by the way," he added dryly.

"Don't change the subject."

He sighed, rubbing between his eyes. "Because everyone, no matter who they are deserve the service of a fair trial."

"But _him_," she continued. "That _tyrant_ killed Pike! Without even a hint of remorse or reflection—"

"Federation law clearly states 'innocent until proven guilty,'" Jim snapped his frustration swelling. "It's a mandate from your time too."

"I'm well aware of the US Constitution thank you very much," she barked. "But Jim—"

"No, Charlie," he interrupted, stepping up and grasping her shoulders in a firm hold, his fingers digging into her skin. "I know how you feel. I want nothing more to pay the same respect that Harrison showed Pike, but that would be lowering ourselves to his level. We are Starfleet officers; we are above petty revenge. We're going to bring him back and make him pay through the same legal processes as all other criminals in the Federation. We will not do what the Klingons would."

Charlie sucked her lip between her teeth, contemplating the comparison Jim made. She ran a frustrated hand across her forehead before she puffed out a defeated breath and nodded in agreement.

"Okay, you're right," she acknowledged in a long, drawn out sigh. "I really hate to admit it, but you are right. I'm sorry. It's an old excuse, but I don't know how to handle this. The way I feel right now scares me, and you know better than most I'm not the best person when it comes to this feeling stuff."

"I know," he said, his hold on her shoulders loosening and his thumb stroking her bare arm. "But trust me. It's like you told me earlier. To go against our laws even for the right reasons is ethically wrong."

"It's not entirely fair when you use my own words against me," she grumbled.

"Welcome to my world and I wasn't lying. I like the yellow," he smirked as he stepped away from her, his arms dropping to his sides.

Charlie rolled her eyes to the ceiling and shook her head.

"I wonder why," she muttered, although a grin tugged at her lips. "By the way, where's Chekov? I didn't see him out there. I was going to see if he wanted help at the weapons station, if that's alright with you. It's what I was best at back in San Francisco."

"Chekov no longer manages that station," Jim said, his posture stiffening. "He's my new Chief of Engineering."

"New Chief? Where's Scotty?"

"He quit."

Charlie's eyes widened and her mouth fell open in shock. "He quit! Why?"

"He wouldn't sign for the torpedoes, even after I ordered him to. He hasn't been happy with the way Starfleet has been moving the last few months, and decided the classified spects were the last straw."

"Get him back!" she ordered. "This ship can't function without Scotty. He knows it inside and out, better than anyone."

"I won't," Jim averred, shaking his head, his legs spread in a wide stance with his hands on his hips. "He chose not to be on this ship and follow my orders. I don't care how good he is, I need people who will listen to me."

"And if we run into a problem? I know Chekov is good, but he's still just a kid. He hasn't even been tested in the demands of engineering."

"Did you come on this ship to question every decision I make?" Jim accused, his eyes narrowed in anger.

"What? No! Of course not," Charlie denied. "It's just –"

"Just what?" he fumed. "Listen, I want Scotty onboard, but I'm not going to stop him if he doesn't want to be here. I need everyone to be a hundred percent committed to this mission. You included."

"I am," she emphasized, narrowing her gaze and a muscle twitching in her jaw. "But the team is only as good as its weakest member. Are you sure Chekov is ready?"

"He's going to have to be."

Charlie sighed, mulling over another way to approach the irritated captain. "Look, I know you're grieving, but think. This might not be the most log—"

"I swear, if you say 'logical choice' I'll assign you to monitoring frequencies from the gamma quadrant."

Charlie snapped her mouth closed and glared into his cerulean blue eyes.

"You are being obscenely stubborn today."

"Yeah, well, get used to it," he growled, brushing past her and stomping out of the ready room.

Charlie stood stunned a moment, blinking into the now empty room in surprise. Pursing her lips in frustration and pulling her shoulders taunt, she returned to the bridge and stomped up the steps where Uhura stood, not looking in Jim's direction. She noticed McCoy around the other side of the bridge with his brows raised toward the ceiling. Catching his eye, she shook her head and took a position next to the communications officer, wanting nothing to do with anyone of the male sex. Charlie tried to keep the grinding of her teeth quiet and her facial features relaxed while she stared at the whirling blue particles outside the ship. She knew how adept Uhura was at picking up signals no one else could see, but her attempts were in vain.

"Problem?" Uhura mumbled to her, a knowing look in her hard, dark gaze.

"Kirk," Charlie revealed after a moment. "You?"

She hesitated a moment. "Spock," Uhura admitted.

"Why are men so stubborn?" Charlie sighed.

"And ignorant," Uhura added.

"And pigheaded."

"Unfeeling."

"Thick."

"Inconsiderate."

"Know-it-alls," they both finished, sending an amused smirk to each other.

"Hoes before bros?" Charlie asked, holding her hand out to shake.

"What?" Uhura questioned, her eyes widened in surprise.

"It's an expression from my time. It kind of means always keep your friends first and your man second. Friends are the ones you need when your man is being stupid, and with the guys we have we need all the help we can get."

Uhura deliberated for a moment before she smirked and grasped Charlie's outstretched hand. "Hoes before bros," she agreed.

Suddenly everyone lurched forward with a scream as the ship came to a violent and abrupt stop. Charlie and Uhura were thrown off their feet, both barely able to catch themselves on the rail that circled the upper deck of the bridge. The abrupt stop had tossed the captain from his chair, and while Charlie took stock of her new bruises, she saw him rise to his feet and hurry to the front station while Sulu searched for a reason behind the unintended termination of their flight.

"Engineering manually dropped us out of warp, sir," Sulu said.

"Well that was rude," Charlie muttered, straightening her dress.

Jim snapped on the call button for engineering. "Mr. Chekov, did you break my ship?"

"Sorry, sir, I don't know what happened!" the young engineer's frantic voice was heard through the bridge's speaker. "The core overheated, I had to actiwate the emergency stop. It must be a coolant leak, I need time to find it. Sorry, Keptin."

Charlie and Uhura shared startled glances as Jim's soft "Dammit" rang through the bridge.

"Mr. Sulu, time our destination," he asked as Charlie and Uhura assessed each other for injuries.

"Are you okay?" Charlie inquired as she rubbed her elbow, which had slammed against the large, translucent panel in front of her.

"Yes, I think I'm fine," Uhura answered, brushing off her dress and turning toward the conversation between the captain and Sulu.

"Twenty minutes, Sir," Sulu said. "But that's twenty minutes in enemy space we weren't counting on."

"Alright, we better hop to it," Kirk sighed, turning to address the crew behind him.

"Where's Spock?" he questioned Uhura when he noticed the absent Vulcan.

"Here, Captain," Spock announced as he rushed from the turbolift, sidestepping around Charlie and Uhura.

"You're coming with me to Qo'nos," Jim ordered, directing his attention to Uhura. "Lieutenant, how's your Klingon?"

"It's rusty, but it's good," she replied.

"Good, you're coming too." He glanced between the pair, his eyes narrowing as he stepped forward. "This isn't going to be a problem, is it? You two working together?"

"Absolutely not," Uhura asserted, sending a pointed glance at Spock before spinning on her heel and stomping away. She sent Charlie an acknowledging nod as she strolled by, whispering, "Hoes before bros."

Charlie smirked which widened when Spock answered, "Unclear." He followed the same path as Uhura, his brow raised in puzzlement from the amusement Charlie exhibited. Once the Vulcan passed, Charlie scrambled down the stairs, following McCoy to the captain.

"Jim, you're not actually going down there, are you?" McCoy asked. "You don't rob a bank when the getaway car has a flat tire."

Jim hit the button on the arm of his chair, "I'm sure engineering will have us all patched up by the time we get back. Isn't that right, Mr. Chekov?"

"Yes, Keptin," the unsure engineering chief answered. Jim smirked at the Doctor with satisfaction. "I'll do my best, Sir."

Charlie could feel the glare from McCoy where she stood as Jim turned to address his pilot. "Mr. Sulu, you have the conn. Once we're en route, I want you to transmit a target comm burst to Harrison's location. You tell him you have a bunch of real big torpedoes pointed at his head and if he doesn't play nice, you're not afraid to use them."

She watched the hesitation rise in Sulu, his eyes flickering to the chair. Jim noticed the movement as well and probed, "Is that a problem?"

"No, Sir," Sulu answered, his dark stare unable to shift from the chair. "I've just never sat in the chair before."

"You're gonna do fine," Kirk assured, turning to head toward the shuttle bay, his gaze flashing to Charlie's who stood to the side. Her hands remained clashed in front of her and she tilted her chin up just enough to stare straight at him.

"You have a problem too?" he asked, the barest hint of threat underlining his voice.

"No, Captain," she complied, glancing away from his probing stare. "I know there's no stopping you once you get an idea in your head."

"Oh, good then," Jim murmured, surprised.

"I would request to join the away team, however."

"No, I want you here with Bones and Sulu," Jim denied, stepping closer and dipping his head down to mutter in her ear. "We stopped earlier than I wanted. Someone may come looking where we don't want them to. They might need your help and I know you'll take care of the ship for me. It was your battle strategy after all."

Charlie mulled that over, her eyes flicking to his in astonishment. It was as close to an apology as she was going to get.

"Yes, Sir."

He nodded in appreciation and opened his mouth as if to say something else. At her raised brow, he shook his head and continued toward the turbolift while McCoy ran after trying unsuccessfully to dissuade the stubborn man.

"Mr. Sulu, make sure that K'normian ship is ready to fly," Jim ordered as he left.

Charlie glanced over her shoulder as he disappeared and then headed down the stairs as Sulu plopped himself down on the chair, his spine straightening and his face hardening into one of a captain. Activating the call button on the armrest, he spoke, "Acting Captain Sulu to Shuttle Bay 2. Please have the trade ship we confiscated during the Mudd incident last month fueled and flight ready. Captain Kirk is en route to you now."

"Mudd incident?" Charlie asked bemused as she glanced down.

"You don't want to know," Sulu answered with a visible shiver.

Surprised by his reaction she said, "Knowing Jim, probably not. Tell me later though."

"Captain, the K'normian ship has left the shuttle bay," Lieutenant Darwin at the navigator's station informed.

"Alright, inform me when Captain Kirk is within Klingon space."

"Aye, Sir."

"You ready for this?" Charlie said as she stared down at the acting captain. Having never been in the position of acting captain, she was worried about how well Sulu would respond to the pressure of the rank.

"I was born ready," Sulu declared as Charlie snorted. "I've always wanted to say that," he added sheepishly.

She grinned and glanced up when McCoy shuffled down the stairs, grumbling to himself with his body tense and angry.

"Don't worry, Doctor," Charlie reassured. "Jim's got this."

"It's not him I'm worried about," McCoy attested as he shuffled his feet.

"They've entered Klingon Space, Captain," Darwin said just as Jim's voice came over the intercom.

"Mr. Sulu, I think we found our man. You let him know you mean business."

"Aye, Captain," Sulu answered, shifting in the chair and sitting even taller than before. Activating the call beacon, Sulu commanded, "Attention, John Harrison. This is Captain Hikaru Sulu of the _U.S.S. Enterprise_. A shuttle of highly trained officers is on its way to your location. If you do not surrender to them immediately, I will unleash an entire payload of advanced long-range torpedoes currently locked onto your location. You have two minutes to confirm your compliance. Refusal to do so will result in your obliteration. If you test me, you will fail."

Both McCoy and Charlie flicked their startled gazes to the man occupying the captain's chair.

"Mr. Sulu," McCoy said, gaining the man's attention. "Remind me never to piss you off."

"Yeah, I'm watching my back next fencing match," Charlie agreed.

"Lock onto the shuttle," Sulu ordered with a suppressed grin lifting his lips. "I want their location known at all times in case we need to beam them back."

"Aye, Sir," a chorus rang out.

"Do you think Harrison will surrender?" Charlie voiced, apprehensive by the dangers posed by the mission. She had to remind herself that the actions taken by Jim and the others were part of the job description for Starfleet, and it now applied to her as well.

"He'd be a complete idiot not too," McCoy responded, crossing his arms as he too watched the screen with barely concealed distrust.

"Doesn't mean he won't put up a fight," she pointed out. "Look at the damage he caused at Starfleet. Someone like that is unpredictable."

"Well good thing for us, so is Captain Kirk," Sulu responded.

"I'm going down to the medbay," McCoy announced, unfolding his arms and turning towards the lift. "Lord knows what that kid'll do to Harrison when he catches up with him. Better get everything prepared in case of unpredictability. You coming, Ensign?"

"Ensign?" Sulu questioned, rotating his startled gaze to Charlie.

"What the outfit didn't give it away?" she scoffed.

"Just thought you were trying to fit in around here," Sulu shrugged.

"Nope," she shook her head. "I'm an acting ensign for this mission, per Captain Kirk's orders. I am here to contribute in any way I can. Pike was training me before. . ." The rest was left unsaid, Sulu nodding as he listened.

"Ensign Noland will stay on the bridge, Doctor McCoy," Sulu commanded, swinging toward him. "She's to assist me until the captain and Mr. Spock return."

Charlie grinned as she pulled her shoulders back, sending McCoy a satisfied wink. McCoy just rolled his eyes heavenward and shook his head. Once the doors to the turbolift closed, Charlie turned toward the weapons station.

"Anything on the scanners?" she asked. "The Klingons might come looking for a fight if they know we're here."

"Nothing yet," the lieutenant said. "Some chatter a few light years away, but we're outside their range."

"Keep an eye on them," Sulu ordered. "I want to know the minute—" a warning flared on the view screen, cutting of Sulu's command as the information pertaining to the shuttle and its whereabouts dropped off. "What happened? Where's their signal?"

"It cut out," Hannity said as she fiddled with the controls. "I'm working to get them back."

"Shit," Charlie growled, stomping over towards an open console. "Looks like a D-4 class Klingon vessel was in the area before they cut out," she said, as her fingers clumsily flew across the screen, unused to the fast displays and torrents of information flying at her. "My guess is they found it too and went silent to avoid detection."

"Or they're being pursued and their scanners were jammed," Hannity added.

"Or that," Charlie reluctantly agreed.

"I thought the Ketha province was abandoned," Sulu said.

"Could be a random patrol or their heat signatures were detected," Hannity suggested.

"See what you can find in the province they were heading to, Ensign," Sulu snapped. "Maybe there's something there that can aid them."

"Aye, Sir."

Charlie paused with her hands above the screen, unsure where to begin. Drawing her lip between her teeth in concentration, Charlie shook the hesitant thoughts from her mind and quickly isolated a map of the Ketha province, using the scanners on the port side of the ship to detect the emission signatures of the K'normian ship. A beacon was highlighted as she increased the scanner's intensity and narrowed its field of view.

"I found them, Captain!" she declared, her heart pounding as she noticed the other emissions surrounding the ship. She threw the images from her console onto the view screen, letting those on the bridge analyze the readings on their own. "They appeared to have landed near an industrialized site, but there are three other ships with them. I think they're Klingon."

"I'm detecting phaser blasts, Captain," Darwin said, her fingers blurring by the speed of her movements. "Numerous ones."

"Klingons?" Sulu barked, sitting forward in the chair.

"Some. Most are from an unknown origin, but they seem to be targeted at the Klingons."

Charlie's brow wrinkled in confusion as she turned to stare at Sulu. "Could it be Harrison?"

"Why would he help them?" Sulu argued. "He fled to the Klingons for a reason."

"Should we transport them back?" She suggested, her knees beginning to shake as her stomach tightened into a ball of worry. "Captain, they could be in danger."

"Can you get a lock on their location?"

"Negative, Captain," Hannity answered. "There's too much interference between us and them, and the phaser fire isn't helping. If Mr. Scott was here, maybe, but . . ." she trailed off.

Sulu hesitated, his hand flexing as his fingers splayed out before clutching back into a fist. "Are the torpedoes still locked onto that location?" he asked.

"Aye, Sir."

Sulu's dark eyes flashed to Charlie. There was a hint of sympathy in their black depths, his lips tightening into a fine line. "Give them five more minutes, but if we don't read anything, fire on that location."

"What?" Charlie snapped as she stared incredulously at Sulu. "But they're still down there!"

"And they have five minutes to find Harrison. They could already be gone, Charlie. We can't let him get away, even if it means firing into Klingon space with the captain still down there."

She spun towards the view screen where the indicator of the ship was still highlighted in a bright, blinking orange. Her breathing became rapid and sharp, black spots dancing in front of her eyes as she hyperventilated. She couldn't lose Jim, not after Pike. It was too soon. He wasn't supposed to die like that, not yet. Her heart pounded like Thor's hammer against her ribcage and she wanted nothing more than to throw up. She closed her eyes as she leaned against the console, breathing through her nose in an attempt to calm down. They still had five minutes, she reasoned with herself. They had only been gone for thirty. She had to trust that Jim, Spock, and Uhura could get the job done. With a snap, her eyes opened and she stood tall. Trust. She had to trust them.

"Lieutenant Uhura to Bridge," a voiced echoed through the speakers, gaining everyone's attention. "We have Harrison in custody. We're on our way back to your location now."

Charlie breathed a sigh of relief, echoed by those around her, especially the man occupying the chair.

"We copy you Lieutenant," Sulu said. "I'll send an armed guard of security to rendezvous with you onboard. Sulu out." He slumped against the back of the chair with a sigh, his head collapsing to rest on cushion as he closed his eyes in relief. "Noland, go down and gather security, then bring them to rendezvous with the away team."

"Aye, Sir," Charlie nodded, jogging up the steps and into the turbolift. Within minutes she had gathered a team of six red shirts, armed to the brim with rifles and phasers, and were waiting in the cargo bay for the return of Jim and K'normian ship.

As they were standing, Charlie noticed Carol by a console bay, her tricorder in hand as she inputted details into its database. She narrowed her eyes at the blonde, the same sensations of familiarity and distrust from the shuttle unchanged. Excusing herself from the security detail, Charlie headed over to Carol.

"Hey," she said, causing Wallace to jump and spin around, her blue eyes wide in surprise.

"Oh, hello," she greeted in her lilting British. "Can I help you with something, Ensign…?"

"Noland," Charlie answered, sticking out her hand. "Charlotte Noland. I was wondering what you could tell me about those torpedoes we brought onboard."

"Ensign Noland," Carol spoke slowly, grasping her hand for one shake before dropping it. "I'm afraid that's classified."

"See, the said the same thing to our Chief Engineer, and he ended up quitting over it." Charlie clasped her hands behind her back as her dark stare bore into Carol's blue. She noted that both were the same the height and their builds were not much different from each other.

Carol's eyes broadened as she stuttered, "I-I'm sorry to hear that, but I'm afraid I know as much as you do."

"Well see you're a weapons specialist, so you know a bit more actually," Charlie smiled, although it didn't reach her eyes.

"You were onboard the shuttle?" Carol asked.

"That I was Dr. Wallace," she nodded. "And I want to know why Marcus sent you here. He doesn't do anything without a motive behind it, and it's been my experience that his motives tend to be questionable. What is in those missiles?"

A chime rang out, signaling the return of the ship carrying Harrison. Charlie knew she had to return to her post, but something still didn't sit right with her. Carol couldn't keep still, her gaze wandered to everything but Charlie's and she fiddled with the tricorder in her hand. Every instinct told her Carol was lying about something, but she couldn't put her finger on what that was.

"I'm afraid I don't know, Ensign Noland," Carol reiterated. "I am here to find out."

Charlie felt the rumble of the incoming ship's engines and knew she had to return. "Well when you find out, be sure to let the captain know. The last thing he needs is some errant weapon of mass destruction onboard his stranded ship in the Neutral Zone."

Without waiting for an answer, Charlie spun on her heel and headed back to where the group of security waited for her. With a nod, she led the group down the narrow corridor to the dock where the ship parked. Just as they reached the landing, the doors to the ship slid opened and out stepped Kirk, followed by a tall, dark-haired stranger in a trench coat and his hands in shackles. The security team immediately surrounded the prisoner as Jim moved aside, and with a quick word from him, had Harrison marching toward the brig.

Charlie stepped to the side as they passed, Harrison's bright, cerulean eyes catching hers where they lingered a moment before he shifted his gaze forward again. While the exchange only lasted an instant, Charlie felt like ice now pumped through her veins and she stood frozen in place, unable to think or breathe. As soon as the moment had come, it was gone, Charlie shaking her head to clear it while she scowled at the back of his head in confusion.

Spock and Uhura followed the group, each sending an acknowledging nod to Charlie while Jim lingered behind when he noticed her standing near the wall.

"Welcome back—Jesus Jim, what happened to you? You look like you got your ass handed to you," she exclaimed as by the lights of the hangar bay highlighted the fresh bruises and cuts on his face. She reached up to brush a strand of hair away from one on his forehead and he winced when her fingers barely brushed the skin.

"You should see the other guy," he tried to joke, but the humor didn't reach his eyes.

"Are you okay?" she probed as they turned to follow the brigade down the hallway.

"I'm fine," he brushed off, his strides long and quick as he hurried to catch the group.

"Mmhmm," Charlie hummed unconvinced as she raced to keep up. "So that's Harrison?" she nodded forward toward the taller dark head surrounded by redshirts. "He doesn't look that dangerous."

"I want you to stay away from him," Jim ordered.

Charlie lifted a brow, glancing at the captain with skepticism. "What makes you think I want anything to do with him?"

"Because I know you, I know how much Pike meant to you, but he's a monster, Charlie. He took out over twenty Klingons and three ships with barely a glance. I don't want him to ruin you too."

"How on earth could he ruin me?" she scoffed as she stopped, her arms crossing over her chest as she turned toward Jim. He sighed and ran a quick hand through his hair in exasperation.

"By getting into your head," he explained as he reached up and gripped the back of her skull, his fingers digging into her hair. "Don't let him do that."

"Thank you for the warning, Captain, but give me more credit than that."

"I am." He leaned forward and laid a kiss on her forehead.

"What was that for?" she asked, reaching up to grasp his warm hand in her cold one.

"Just something Uhura said when we went down to Qo'nos. There was a brief moment there when I thought we weren't coming back."

"If you had waited any longer, you weren't."

"Then it's a good thing we got him when we did," Jim remarked, releasing her hand and following the group again. Although it was sweet what he said, Charlie noted Jim was distracted, and his stare couldn't leave the back of Harrison's head. She was surprised he hadn't burned a hole through it. Whipping out his communicator, Jim commanded, "Bones, meet me in the brig."

"_Be right there."_

"Lieutenant!" Jim shouted, gaining the attention of Spock and Uhura, both turning around to face him. "Contact Starfleet, let them know we have Harrison in custody, and we'll be on our way once the warp core is repaired." Although he didn't look too convinced by the thought.

"Aye, Sir," she agreed as he nodded and spun to continue on his way.

"Jim," Charlie called as she ran to catch up with him, leaving the other pair alone for a moment. "Just . . . be careful, when you talk to him. Don't let him get in your head either."

Jim responded with a tight smile as he leaned down, leaving a gentle, warm kiss against her lips. "I promise," he said before heading to his quarters to change.

Charlie watched as he walked away, her heart berating the inside of her chest as both fire and ice burned through her veins. Backing up, she turned just as Spock and Uhura broke apart and headed in their own directions. She scurried forward and managed to catch the lift Uhura occupied, sliding in just as the doors hissed shut.

"Hey," she greeted, noticing the tension in Uhura's eyes.

"Hey," Uhura responded.

"You okay?"

Uhura sighed, rubbing a hand across her forehead. "Yeah, I think so. That wasn't the cleanest arrest, but at least we got him. I now understand what you mean about the Klingons."

"Nasty little buggers," Charlie scowled without the heat.

Uhura chuckled, "Yeah, I'll say."

"What happened to Jim?"

"When?"

"Down on that planet," Charlie emphasized. "He went down all cocky and sure of himself, and came back . . . different."

"It wasn't pretty, what Harrison did," Uhura remembered, her eyes wide and glassy and her hands shaking. "I've never seen anyone fight like that. It was precise, not even a hint of hesitation. He handled the weapons with such tactical force and expertise. No has ever scared me that way he did. Not even Nero."

Charlie glanced away, chewing her bottom lip as she deliberated in her head. "Did he say anything? Anything at all about why he attacked Starfleet?"

"No. He just asked how many torpedoes there were and then surrendered."

Charlie snapped her gaze to her friend's in astonishment as the doors of the lift hissed open. "The torpedoes?"

"Yeah," Uhura shrugged as she walked out. "I have no idea either. You coming?"

"Ah, no," she shook her head. "I've got something else to do. I'll meet up with you later."

The doors closed on Uhura's skeptical face while Charlie chewed the nail of her thump in concentration. She had a criminal to go see. Orders be damned.

* * *

><p><strong>Reviews are most appreciated. And yes, a certain somebody will be seen next chapter. Didn't want you to be waiting for too long<strong>


	11. Chapter Eleven: Rain

**You all have waited so patiently for this chapter, I couldn't let you wait another week. I hope you all enjoy reading because I had a lot of fun writing it :)**

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><p><strong>Chapter Eleven: Rain<strong>

The minute the turbolift arrived on the deck with the brig, all the bravado and confidence Charlie had blew away with the opening hiss of the doors. Jim had specifically ordered her to _not_ to meet with Harrison, but after the discussion with Uhura and her time in Marcus's clutches, how could she not? Something didn't add up, something she feared was very dangerous. Why did Harrison go rogue, why did he surrender to Jim without a fight and what was up with those torpedoes? She could feel something was wrong, something bigger than Jim might even be aware of and she would break all the rules if it meant those she loved on the _Enterprise _were safe.

Charlie peeked out her head into the isolated hallway before she stepped from the turbolift, her ears trained for any hint of the captain. Hearing and seeing nothing, she relaxed her tense muscles and dropped her shoulder against the wall. Now that she was there, what reason could she use if someone she didn't want caught her down there? Drawing her lip between her teeth, she rubbed her forehead as she thought. She could get a DNA sample for McCoy, but then she remembered Jim called him down there already. There was the idea of a written confession, but she wasn't a lawyer. She had to be sly, to make the excuse viable enough she could argue she was following protocol.

With a start, her sister's voice echoed in her head and she ran to a computer station near the entrance of the prison. It only took her a couple minutes to find what she was looking for and she grinned in triumph. A stop by a food synthesizer later and she had herself covered should anyone ask why she was in the brig.

The instant she walked around the bright corner with the tray in her hands, Charlie could feel all the rage and grief she repressed rise to the surface like a thundering tsunami. The very sight of the strong man in black, his hair slicked back and his eyes piercing had all her hackles rising and she felt herself stiffen her shoulders and draw her chin higher. A hint of amusement entered his gaze when he caught sight of her, sauntering closer to the glass as she moved to the side of the cell and shoved the tray of food through the hatch.

"What's this?" he asked.

"What's it look like?" she snipped. "Brought to you courtesy of Starfleet protocols."

Harrison picked up the tray with a curled lip of distain before he placed it on a shelf. "You don't like me much, do you," he remarked, his sharp gaze flipping over his shoulder and meeting Charlie's. She felt the same icy coolness from before flood her system and had to resist the urge to shudder.

"What gave it away?" she retorted, glaring into his hard, unforgiving eyes. Eyes that held no remorse, no hint that he regretted any of his decisions.

"Your distain is palpable."

"And here I was trying so hard to hide it."

Harrison smirked as he turned towards her. "Now I wonder what could cause such strong emotions from one so small."

"Come out here and say that to my face, then you'll learn how small I am."

He grinned, the first signs of light entering his cold gaze. "Refreshing. It's always a pleasure speaking with someone so . . . passionate. Tell me, why do harbor such passions towards me?"

Charlie paused, glowering through the glass and chewing her lip. Something about this man was different. It was evident in the way he shifted, the cat-like restraint in his movements and the promise of pain should he release those muscles to do what they appeared bred to do. But it was more than that. He wasn't like Sagan who was misguided and grieving. He appeared human there was something _in _human about his actions, the way he spoke, the hint of brilliance locked behind those startling green eyes.

"You killed," she challenged.

"I've killed a lot of people, you need to be more specific," he snapped.

"Are you gloating?"

"Merely stating a fact, Ensign . . ." She remained silent. "You're not going to give me your name? That's not very nice."

"Tough shit."

"Temper. I'm not sure your Captain would agree with your choice of language."

"He doesn't control me."

"Oh now that isn't true."

"Really? And what brought you that conclusion, Sherlock?"

Harrison laughed then, a predatory feral sound. "It's simple really. You brought me this meager choice of food because you wanted to talk to me, and this is your excuse. Don't look so shocked, Ensign, it's practically obvious. Now the question is why would you go through such trouble to speak to me? Obviously, I did something you disagree with, and we'll get to that later. No, let's focus on the task at hand. It's because someone _ordered_ you not to see me that you would have to go out of your way to find an appropriate reason. There's only a handful of people onboard this vessel with the power to do so; that you would listen to. You don't strike me as an obedient woman, but you also don't want to create problems. That means you have to remain under the radar, make as little noise as possible. Tell me, who would suffer the most if word of your exploits were to get out?"

Charlie smirked, her brow raised in defiance as she crossed her arms. She remained silent, however, unwilling to influence any conclusion Harrison would come up with. She had learned early in her life, silence was a valuable tool.

"I've heard of this Captain," Harrison continued, stalking toward the glass and lowering the deep vibrato of his voice. "That wildly _passionate_ man who has saved the Federation from a suicidal Romulan, and later a Klingon plot on the outer reaches of the galaxy. He intrigues me; that wonderfully simplistic idea of right verse wrong. His naivety is refreshing.

"He was in here earlier, but of course you know this. He must be important to you, more important than a simple ensign/CO relationship for you to risk so much just for one word. It's that relationship that controls you, doesn't it? You love him."

Charlie kept her expression passive, but her heart rate had increased and she knew her brows had risen in surprise before she got herself under control. "Impressive," she drawled as she began to pace in front of the glass. "Really, that was quite a trick."

"It was far more than a trick."

"Wasn't it?" she goaded. "I'm barely in here five minutes and you think you have me figured out."

"I have everyone figured out, Ensign. Human nature does not change."

She matched his grin then. "Trust me. There are things about me that would blow your mind."

His eyes narrowed and he cocked his head to the side, staring intently at Charlie. He racked his jade gaze from the top of her dark hair, over her yellow uniform, down her legs to the tips of her black, scuffed boots. Cocking her hip, she cleared her throat and his eyes snapped to her unamused ones. "Like what you see?" she challenged.

"You appear familiar to me. How?"

"I don't know, you tell me."

"The manner you speak, it is not like the others."

"'The manner I speak?'" she echoed with a scoff. "Really, that's what you're picking up on? Pretty sure I speak American English just like a lot of people here."

"American?" Harrison's interest visibly changed. He faced her fully, coming as close to the glass as he could while he glared at her. "You are American?"

Confused, Charlie said, "Duh. What else would I be?"

"From the United States?"

Charlie paused then, warning flags sparking in her mind when she remembered what Pike had told her after one of her history classes. "Don't you mean the former?" she tried.

"No," he growled, his voice deep and powerful, instilling itself in her very core. "Not the former. You aren't from the former."

"How can I not be from the former United States? The US doesn't exist anymore."

"You aren't from this time." There was such finality in his tone, like the moment the last puzzle piece is connected to all the others.

Charlie snapped her mouth closed and pursed her lips in annoyance. After a moment, she muttered, "but that's impossible. Time travel is impossible."

"You did it. How?"

"I don't know—"

"Do not lie to me, Ensign," he growled deep in his throat, his words punctuated with force. "I am an augment, your superior, your ruler. Do not lie to me."

Charlie took a hesitant step backward, that lethalness she detected earlier shining through like a beacon. She was starting to doubt her decision to speak to Harrison, but at the same time she felt her back stiffen and her fists clench. He was under lock and key, brought onboard by Jim and as soon as they were in motion again, he was headed back to Earth to face trial. He couldn't hurt her.

"And I thought Marcus had a superiority complex," she sneered. "I don't know what an augment is, but whatever you are, you don't scare me. I'll give it you, I'm not from around here, but this isn't my first rodeo either. I came here to see you, to look into the eyes of the person who killed one of the most important men in my life. You're a murderer, plain and simple, and you will answer for your crimes when the time comes. Feel lucky Captain Kirk didn't release those torpedoes on you, because I sure would have."

Harrison shook his head, his arms going behind is back as he turned to pace away from her. "The 20th century."

"I beg your pardon?" she asked.

"You are from the 20th century. As am I."

Charlie paused, her mouth hanging open like a fish starving for oxygen while her brows furrowed in confusion. "And what makes you think—"

"You thirst for blood," he growled, again coming up against the glass wall of his prison like a tiger wanting to attack and forcing Charlie back several more steps by the speed of his movements. "You thirst for my blood, to avenge the man close to you. The man I _killed._ The men of this time, of this era do not share the same desire. Your Kirk proved that when he decided to request my surrender instead of releasing those torpedoes. Do not deny it."

Charlie stood still, glaring at the dangerous man behind the glass wall. "Fine. I was born at the end of the 20th century. And you?"

"When?" he asked, ignoring her question.

"1989." Harrison paused, his stare hardening further, feeling as if he were trying to pierce her soul. "But I don't see why that is of any consequence," she added, rising her chin. "How did you end up here?"

"That I am afraid is my own business."

"No, if we're sharing are deepest secrets, you have to play along too. It doesn't have something to do with those nifty torpedoes we have, does it?" she challenged. He only remained silent and watching, Charlie shuffled her feet as she answered with her own. "Fine then," she said. "If you aren't going to play along, I guess this conversation is over." She spun on her heel, the blood pounded in her ears from what she had just learned of their mysterious prisoner. She had to tell Jim, to let them know Harrison was not what he seemed.

"He'll end up just like him," Harrison shouted at her retreating back.

Unable to ignore the threat, she glanced over her shoulder and asked, "Who will end up like whom?"

"_Captain_ Kirk. He will grow to be like Marcus."

"So he'll become an Admiral. Great, that's moving up the ranks," she shrugged.

"That's not what I mean," he spat. "I remember you, now. I remember reading your file; Case number 626, Ensign." She smirked, turned fully and crossed her arms as she gestured for him to continue. Harrison scowled, but there was a light of pleasure in his pale eyes. "A woman of my world, lost in this century. Marcus took you into custody; took you away from your captain and everyone else on this ship. He forced you to remain on Earth and attend frivolous meetings with him and his counselors while Kirk travelled the galaxy like you always dreamed."

"He had his motives —"

"Oh yes he did. He wanted you for me."

Charlie's head titled to the side. "He what? I don't understand."

"No, you couldn't, could you? You're not like me. You weren't bred to be the best, to be far superior to any other human."

"Well, if you're so _superior_ then why are you on the other side of the glass?" Charlie challenged, sauntering up to the wall of the cell herself. She knew how she looked, the short yellow dress showing off more of her legs than she liked, hugging her curves and emphasizing how much of a woman she was. She tilted her head back, the wisps from her bangs brushing the corners of her eyes. Her gaze narrowed further. She didn't know where her bravado was coming from, but just looking at Harrison and the arrogance he emitted set her teeth on edge. "Why stand behind there like a puppy in a cage?"

The predator came back, his grin feral and fierce. "I have my reasons. I _let_ your captain take me onto this ship. I _surrendered_ to him and his pathetic crew for my own purposes. I could have destroyed them with barely a whisper."

"And why didn't you?" she barked. "If you're so high and mighty, why didn't you take them out instead of letting yourself be captured?"

"I told you, I have my reasons," he answered dismissively.

She glared at him as he turned his back to her, stalking around the tiny room. "And you're telling me this why? I could go to Jim and tell him everything you've just told me."

"But you won't," Harrison said.

"Really? Who's going to stop me? You?" she dared.

Harrison smirked, glancing over his shoulder. "I don't have to. In order to explain to _Jim_ everything I told you, you would have to admit to seeing me. And you went through all this trouble to bring me my snack." Charlie's eyes widened a fraction when she realized he was right. If she were to tell Jim that Harrison was from her time, and that he surrendered for a purpose still undetermined, she risked his wrath as her captain, and worse, her boyfriend. "I see you've reached the same conclusion. It's a shame you already fear him."

"I don't fear him," she spat. "He has never given me a reason to. He's the smartest, bravest, kindest man I've ever met, and he loves me."

"There's a difference between the man and the captain, Ensign."

"Like you would know anything about it," she sneered, pacing in front of his cage. "You stand there dolling out relationship advice, but you are the most despicable of beings. You care nothing for anyone, killing a room of innocent men and women with barely a thought, so forgive me if I don't think your advice has much merit here, Sparky."

"You know nothing," Harrison snarled, his visage darkening. "You know _nothing_ of love and loyalty, your standing here evidence of that. Do not _speak_ of what you do not know, Ensign. Of what _I_ lost. It might just kill you."

The threat hung in the air ominously, the reverberations of his deep bass causing the hairs on her arms to stand straight up in fear. But if there was one thing Charlie knew, one piece of advice gained from a Colonel as a father, it was not to back down from a fight, no matter how the odds were against her. "I know more than you give me credit for. You say Jim will become like Marcus. How? Sure Marcus has done some things I don't necessarily agree with, but he is human. We make mistakes."

"You think it is all to do with mistakes? My dear, you are naïve if you think that is the reason."

"The explain it, Harrison. My patience is wearing thin."

"Temper, Ensign," he purred. "It'll start how it always does. First, his focus is on protecting you and his crew, just like every good captain should. But it will escalate. The more dangers you encounter, and the more threats that make their appearance will change him. You will need more and more security, more defenses because the threat that barely brushes across the conscious of your little world demands it. He will become secretive about his plans, become paranoid that he can't see when a true threat is eminent because of what he has faced; what you both have. He will perceive everything as a threat while you are here. So those defenses will increase, a stronger more aggressive approach is warranted until he decides the best defense is a good offense."

"A nuclear deterrent," she breathed, her eyes widened.

"Precisely. You're captain is very persuasive, Ensign," he added, smirking at her. "He is well-known and respected by many in this Federation for his heroic acts. He will use it to his advantage. Kirk obviously has uncontrolled passion, and it is that weakness that will manipulate him."

"You have one thing wrong, Harrison." Her downcast eyes, watching the scenario Harrison described playing in her conscious flickered up to his, narrowed as she glowered at the man behind the glass. "Emotion, passion is not a weakness. It is a strength, and it's a pity no one in your life has taught you that."

"You will learn, Ensign. You and I, we are from a different world than those on this ship. We have seen the costs of war; have felt the icy claws of death and destruction in a way they couldn't even imagine. We are wise to its effects; they are not."

"They've had longer to learn," she said. "This crew, this ship is capable of things we've only dreamed about. I will find out what you want; why you chose to be on this ship and why you attacked the command center of Starfleet. And when I do, you had better pray you're still behind that glass. I will do whatever it takes to protect this crew from _you_. Maybe Captain Kirk has decided to bring you back for a trial; but as you said, I'm from a different time. A different universe you might even say. You may still feel the effects of _21__st_ century justice."

Harrison grinned then, amusement playing in his icy eyes and his smile a Cheshire cat. "I look forward to it."

* * *

><p>Charlie stalked away from the brig with her thoughts swirling as fast a hummingbird wings. All she could think about was the revelations that Harrison shared with her and what that could mean for the future of the ship. As much as she hated to admit it, Harrison made a very valid and startling truth about her and Jim's future. There was a possibility that his prediction could come true, and she could see some of it already.<p>

Then there was the matter of Harrison himself. Charlie couldn't help but argue that she knew next to nothing about the man other than the fact that he was a criminal and a coward. Those facts alone should have dissuaded her from ever assenting to anything he said, but that nugget of doubt that grew in her own mind saw a hint of truth in his words. She swore to herself she'd do everything in her power to stop that prophecy from happening. Jim was too important to her and the Federation.

She ran a quick, frustrated hand through her hair as she headed towards the one place she might find answers to her questions. She rushed into the library and research center, and with a quick nod toward the librarian, she slid into a seat in front of a console. Researching had always been her best skill back home, and during the time she lived on the _Enterprise_ before Sagan had made his appearance, she had become adept at locating hard to find information.

For the next half an hour, Charlie searched, read, and then searched again anything on the man named John Harrison. There was a few times she had to implement less than traditional forms of researching, utilizing back channel networks Scotty had shown her, but she soon came to realize that John Harrison was an enigma. He popped up on Starfleet's radar a about year before, but he didn't seem to exist earlier than that date. It was as if he had just sprung out of nowhere and into Marcus's clutches. Her hands fisted in frustration as she glared at the screen. Who the hell was he? Harrison seemed to have designed the torpedoes, so someone like that had to learn his skill somewhere.

"But where?" she whispered to herself. With an irritated growl, Charlie stood from her station and signed off the console, erasing as much of her history as possible. She needed to talk to Jim, to see if he had found something else about Harrison that she didn't know.

She had just turned the corner towards the bridge, walking across a causeway when she saw Jim to the side rolling his eyes.

"Charlie!" he exclaimed, snapping his communicator closed when he saw her scurrying to him. "Where were you? I've been looking for you everywhere."

"I huh, was researching," she shrugged as she dodged around him. "I didn't want to bother you."

"Researching? Researching what?" Jim questioned.

"Our prisoner," she threw over her shoulder. Within seconds, Jim was by her side as she darted around those in the busy passage.

"You didn't go see Harrison, did you?" he asked, matching her stride.

"I saw him when you took him off the ship, Jim," she responded with a roll of her eyes, her stare straight ahead.

He grabbed her arm and spun her towards him. "I'm serious, Charlie. I don't want you to go near him."

"Why? Harrison's an enigma. I couldn't find anything on him earlier than a year ago; It's like he just materialized out of thin air. Maybe there's something we could learn, something I could find out."

"You have a lot of confidence in yourself, Ensign."

"You're one to talk, _Captain._ I vaguely recall the whole disbelief in a no-win scenario."

"There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance, Charlie."

She narrowed her fiery gaze as she crossed her arms. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you aren't trained for the kind of interrogation required with Harrison—hey!" Charlie had scoffed at his answer and spun on her heel as she headed towards the bridge again. Not trained for interrogation. If only Jim knew of her past. "Don't walk away from me, Ensign," Jim snapped as he snatched her arm again, whipping her around to face him.

"Then don't make stupid assumptions, Captain," she growled as she leaned towards him, her hands rising to her hips.

Jim's face darkened as he matched her posture. "I am ordering you to stay away from him. No excuses. I don't trust him."

"Well I'm not exactly on the bandwagon for that new science officer you added."

Surprise flickered across his eyes while his shoulders sagged in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Carol Wallace," Charlie bit out. "You don't find it at all strange that she just _happened_ to be assigned to the _Enterprise_ at the same time we get these new state-of-the-art torpedoes. Missiles that are so classified your Chief Engineering can't even get the 'spects to?"

"I'm not having this conversation," Jim growled, turning away from her.

"Why not? My points are just as valid as yours are with Harrison," she said, following behind.

"Drop it," he ordered as he continued to stomp down the hallway.

"Jim," the tone of her voice had the captain pausing while he glanced back over his shoulder as the irate woman commanding the middle of the busy corridor. "We really need to learn to communicate better. I know you're the captain, and I'm just an acting ensign, but my opinions have validity too. Would you brush off another member of your crew if they raised legitimate concerns?"

"But your concerns are ridiculous. Dr. Wallace is a weapons specialist assigned by Marcus. She was probably brought onboard because the torpedoes have never been tested before." To Charlie's ears, his defense was weak and lacked conviction. She could see that something didn't seem to sit right from the tension between his eyes and the stiffness of his shoulders. "Listen, I don't have time for this. Harrison gave me some information that might be useful, and as much as I hate to admit it, he's pointed something out I don't like."

Immediately, Charlie's defenses fell and she hurried to Jim's side. "Which is?"

"He gave me coordinates near Jupiter," he muttered. "I just hung up with Scotty who's going to go check them out."

"What do you think it is? And why trust Harrison?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "But I can't help thinking that secret organization of Marcus's didn't just stop at torpedoes. It might be time we find out what's so classified about them. Let's go get Bones and Spock. I need their input." Charlie nodded as she turned towards the doors to the bridge. "And Ensign?"

"Yes?"

"Don't question my authority again. We may be together, but that doesn't give you the right to talk to me like that when we're on duty, understand?"

Charlie grounded her teeth together as heat and indignation rose in her cheeks. She stared at Jim's firm, cerulean stare with a defiant one of her own. But after a moment of the silent showdown, Charlie heard the voice of her past, telling her that after years of military involvement, she should know better.

With a sigh, Charlie gave one curt nod and said, "I understand, Captain," and then followed Jim onto the bridge towards whatever plan next awaited them.

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><p><strong>Please review! I would love to know what you think of Khan, and that little bit of dynamics between him and for reading!<strong>


	12. Chapter Twelve: Run Free

**This is a long one, so I hope that makes up for not posting last week. I wanted too, I really did, but I only have a one chapter buffer between posts, and I'd rather have you wait two weeks for a new chapter instead of a month. I hope you continue to enjoy _De Sanguine Regis_ and brownie points for anyone who can guess the meaning of the title!**

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><p>The calmness of the bridge was a stark contrast to the overwhelming cascade of agitation Charlie was experiencing. She now knew that telling Jim anything Harrison told her would create more problems than it fixed, and while she could admit she had acted irrationally, Jim was not behaving as a saint either. Yes, Pike's death was hard, and he felt it worse than anyone realized, but so did she. Pike's influence over her went beyond a mentor; he had become her father. The guiding light when everything was pitched in black. He protected her, assisted her, healed her. He was her shoulder to cry on and the soothing hand when the nightmares raged at night. Her real father had never made the effort to calm her tears or take the time to explain something she didn't understand. He brushed her off, expecting her to either muscle through or fail. Pike was firm but kind, something her real father couldn't understand.<p>

The only other person who was that important to her was Jim, and over the last twenty-four hours, Charlie couldn't see the man she loved in the captain sitting in the chair. They had yet to be a couple for longer than a few days in the last couple months, and Charlie wondered if their relationship would ever know anything related to normalcy. Could she work under him for years to come? She might have been more familiar with him than an ensign would, but she was his girlfriend! He told her to be open with him, but when she did and he brushed her off, the same as her father, Charlie could see a thread tear in the rope that held them together.

The moment he stepped on the bridge, Jim charged over to speak with Spock and Dr. McCoy without a backward glance at Charlie. With a huff, she paused, raking her eyes over the working crew. The normalcy of the situation was not lost on her, and Charlie understood right then that no matter what happened between her and Kirk, her place would always be on the bridge of a starship. Glancing towards Uhura seated at her station, Charlie decided against another confrontation with Jim, and headed her way. Rawness coated her throat, and she recognized one wrong word could have her unravelling like a ball of yarn in a kitten's paws.

Taking a breath, she jumped in surprise when McCoy exploded, "Are you out of your corn-fed mind?!"

"Hey, Charlie," Uhura acknowledged when she plopped down in the seat next to the communications officer, exhaling a deep sigh and slumping back against the console, tuning out McCoy's explosion.

"Hey," the brunette responded as both their attentions turned to the increasingly loud argument transpiring below.

"The Doctor does have a point, Captain," Spock said.

"Don't agree with me, Spock. It makes me very uncomfortable," McCoy grumbled.

Spock shook his head as he lectured, "Perhaps you, too, should learn to govern your emotions, Doctor. In this situation logic dictates—"

"Logic!" McCoy interrupted. "Oh my God! There's a maniac trying to make us blow up our own damn ship and you're talking about—"

"So are you going to tell me where you ran off to after we talked or are you going to make me guess?" Uhura's voiced snapped Charlie's concentration away from the trio of men.

"What?" she asked, feigning confusion when sharp, green eyes popped into her mind.

"I said are you going to tell me where you went gallivanting off to so mysteriously?"

Charlie shrugged as her thumbnail picked at a her cuticle, her focus shifting back to the arguing men and dodging Uhura's probing stare. "Nowhere special," she shrugged. "Just had to verify a couple things. It's like my dad always said; trust but verify."

"Uh huh, and what was it you had to verify?"

Charlie's passive glance drove Uhura to roll her eyes as her interest shifted back to her station. "Fine, don't tell me, but if it was what I think it was, you're going to get yourself in a whole bunch of trouble."

"Trouble?" Charlie snorted. "You're only in trouble if you get caught."

Uhura just shook her head. "You and Kirk are perfect for each other."

Charlie smirked, and was about to respond when Spock's voice drifted over the pair.

"The Admiral's daughter appeared to have interest in the torpedoes and she is a weapons specialist. Perhaps she could be of some use."

"What?" Charlie gasped as she sat up further. He couldn't be talking about who she thought he was. After all, how many people had come onto the _Enterprise_ rising the suspicion of herself and Spock?

Kirk seemed to be in the same mind set because he asked, "What admiral's daughter?"

"Carol Marcus. Your new science officer concealed her identity to board the ship."

"I knew there was something I didn't like about her!" Charlie hissed, leaping up to Uhura's astonishment and striding over to the group of men. Carol Marcus, of course. The minute that blonde had stepped onto the shuttle back in San Francisco, Charlie knew something wasn't right. To have the daughter of Admiral Marcus on their ship, the very man who caused the biggest headache for Charlie could only end in disaster. And then there was relationship the woman had with prime universe Jim Kirk. Even though Charlie wasn't well-versed in the original series, she had seen the Wrath of Khan and knew the association between the pretty, blonde-haired woman and her captain. A connection that instilled a tiny ice-cold stab of fear in Charlie's chest.

"When were you going to tell me that?" Jim bade Spock.

"When it became relevant. As it just did." There were moments when Charlie enjoyed Spock's sass, especially directed at Jim. It was when Spock's human side could be seen, and he didn't appear to be as stoic and unfeeling. That was not one of those times.

"You're not seriously going to trust someone who snuck aboard your ship and is in fact the daughter of the man who took me away from you, right?" Charlie accosted, stopping next to McCoy as she glared at the captain and first officer.

"She is a weapons specialist," Spock pointed out, turning to regard her. If he was surprised by her presence, he didn't show it.

"Surely there are others onboard the _flagship_ of the Federation who would be just as suitable."

"Not with her qualifications."

"Look, we don't have time to discuss who should be doing what," Kirk interjected as he attempted to placate the Vulcan and angry woman. "Uhura, send for Dr. Wallace—I mean Marcus."

"Aye, Sir."

"Captain, with all due respect, despite her qualifications she still lied to get aboard this ship," Charlie argued. "An act that at minimum requires a court martial and at max means dismissal from Starfleet. One then can only ask why."

"The Spitfire has a point, Jim," McCoy agreed. "Why forge her paperwork? Her assets alone would have got her onboard." The doctor recoiled as Charlie slapped the back of her hand against his arm.

"Thanks for that," Jim derided with a shake of his head and a sheepish glance at Charlie's unamused stare.

"Just trying to liven things up a bit," McCoy shrugged as he rubbed his arm.

The hiss of the turbolift signaled the arrival of the woman in question, her blond bob bouncing as she made her way over to the group. Her confident steps wavered when she noticed the scrutinizing glances of the men and Charlie's barely concealed contempt.

"You called for me, Captain?" she asked, clasping her hands in front of her. She stopped just short of the other's, her blue eyes curiously wandering from person to person.

"Yes I did, Doctor Marcus," Jim said, and Charlie noted a level of alarm that flashed across her eyes. Good. Show her they knew the truth.

"S-sir, I—"

"We'll worry about that later, Doctor," Jim interrupted, his hand coming up to steer Carol toward the bridge's exit, turning his back to Charlie and cutting her off from further discussion with Carol, a discussion she was very interested in beginning. "Right now I have a little issue with those new photon torpedoes and I am hoping you can help with that. Spock, you have the bridge," he threw over his shoulder as they left the bridge.

Charlie blinked at the now empty space. "What just happened?"

"Back home, we'd call that the blow off," McCoy remarked dryly. Charlie angled a glare in his direction and he shrugged. "What?"

Sometimes McCoy pulled the brother card a little too well. "Shut up, McCoy."

Sometime later a call summoned McCoy to the shuttle bay where he was heading to a nearby planetoid with the admiral's daughter and five minutes after that the main doors opened as Sulu called, "Captain on the Bridge."

"Mr. Sulu, have Doctors Marcus and McCoy landed on the planetoid yet?" Jim asked as he strode past Charlie and straight to the view screen, looking out into the inky expanse.

"Yes, Sir," Sulu answered. "They're moving the torpedo into position now."

"Good. Any activity from the Klingons?"

"Not yet. But if we're stuck here much longer, they will find us."

Charlie moved closer to the captain, her steps measured as she paused next to his side. "What are you thinking?" Charlie asked, gazing out into the blackness. She watched as an object no bigger than Pluto came into view, knowing McCoy and Marcus were there with a missile equivalent to a dozen nuclear bombs.

"I'm thinking that 'classified' is a bunch of bullshit," Jim responded, his head angling to catch her eye. She could see the wear and tear on his face, and she knew that he was granting her a glimpse behind the façade he built up as captain. She softened, and reached up to lay a hand on his arm, conveying her silent support. He didn't verbally acknowledge the gesture, but his eyes warmed briefly.

"It's about time," she teased, causing Jim to smirk.

"Lieutenant Uhura, did you let Starfleet know we have Harrison in custody?" he announced, glancing over his shoulder.

"Yes, Sir," the communications officer answered. "No response yet."

"That's a bit strange, isn't it?" Charlie asked as she turned in Uhura's direction, her brows drawn together. "Wouldn't they have gotten back to us? I know the messages have to travel far, but I thought they were quicker than that."

As she opened her mouth to answer, Chekov's voiced boomed through the speakers, cutting off Uhura's explanation. "_Enterprise to bridge._ _Hello. Captain, can you hear me?_"

As Jim turned towards his chair, Charlie leaped up the stairs to stand next to Uhura, listening to the conversation between the captain and Chief of Engineering. "Mr. Chekov," Jim answered as he plopped down onto the black leather. "Give me some good news."

"_We found the leak, Sir, but the damage is substantial. We are working on it."_

"Any idea what caused it?" Jim asked.

"_No, Sir. But I accept full responsibility_."

"Captain?" Charlie voiced, Jim spinning around with his brow raised in question. Something about the timing of the leak was too coincidental for Charlie, and she didn't believe in coincidences. How could a warp core blow a leak that big, especially since the _Enterprise _had gone through routine diagnostics when it was stationed above Earth. "Didn't Scotty have a worry about the warp core before we left spacedock?"

Jim contemplated that thought, Charlie holding his gaze and trying to tell him without words what she was thinking. It was the only thing that made sense and he could see it.

With a small nod, Jim replied to Chekov, "Something tells me it wasn't your fault. Stay on it."

He ended the transmission just as Sulu said, "shuttle is standing by, Captain."

"Bones!" Jim broadcasted. "Thanks for helping out. Dr. Marcus asked for the steadiest hands on the ship."

"_You know when I dreamt about being stuck on deserted planet with a gorgeous woman, there was no torpedo!"_ the doctor's grumpy voice growled from the console.

Charlie snorted as she rolled her eyes. "Dream for him. Nightmare for the woman."

"Dr. McCoy, may I remind you, you are not there to flirt," Jim scolded, his own smile widening as the others on the bridge sniggered.

"Ha, that's like asking a tiger to change its stripes," she mumbled, when an epiphany hit her. If McCoy was interested in Carol Marcus, then there was a chance Charlie could keep the weapons specialist away from the captain. Charlie grinned at the thought, a small plan building her mind.

McCoy ignored Jim as he shouted, "_So how can these legendary hands help you, Dr. Marcus?_" More sniggers erupted from those on the bridge, both Charlie and Uhura rolling their eyes.

"Bones," Jim said exasperated as Carol's voice filtered in.

"_To understand how powerful these weapons are we need to open the warhead. To do that, we need to access the fuel compartment. Unfortunately for us, the warheads on these weapons are live._"

"_Sweetheart, I once a performed an emergency C-section on a pregnant Gorn. Octuplets. Let me tell you, those little bastards bite. I think I can work some magic on your missile._"

"Gorn?" Charlie questioned, Jim spinning towards her by her surprised tone. "When did you interact with the Gorn?"

"How have you heard of them?" Jim asked.

"Uhhh, Pike told me," she lied quickly, realizing the discovery of the Gorn didn't appear to be public knowledge for those back on Earth. She noticed as a sudden stillness descend on the bridge, McCoy and Carol momentarily forgotten. "What?"

Jim winced as he explained, "Remember when I told you about that mission with the Vulcan ships and New Vulcan, and how it was just a routine contact?"

Charlie recalled the conversation. It was one of those rare occasions when Jim wanted to talk but without the video feed. He had made the excuse that some engineering ensign was updating the video, so it was unavailable. Now, she wondered if that was in fact the truth.

"Yes," she drew out.

"That may not have been necessarily accurate."

"Okay," she drawled as her hands subconsciously moved to her hips. "How much of that was true?"

Before Jim could answer, an alarm sounded on the bridge, alerting everyone's attention back to the two Doctors on the neighboring planetoid.

"Sir, the torpedo just armed itself," Sulu cried as he checked the reading coming from their location.

"The warhead's gonna detonate in thirty seconds!" Darwin added, a subtle panic in her tone as she glanced back at the screen where a countdown was now seen.

"_What the hell happened?! I can't get my arm out!_" Bones horror-laced voice screamed out.

Charlie's eye's grew wide and her heart sped up as Jim jumped up, ordering, "Get their signal, beam them back right now!"

"The transporter cannot differentiate between Dr. McCoy and the torpedo," Spock said from his station, standing as his attention also turned back to the screen. "We cannot beam back one without the other."

"Dr. Marcus, can you disarm it?" Kirk asked as Charlie and Uhura came forward, their eyes locked on the three targets flashing on the few screen.

"Come on," Charlie whispered as she heard Carol's shaking voice answer, "_I'm trying. I'm trying."_

"_Jim, get her the hell out of here_!" Bones shouted. Charlie didn't notice her hand on the back of Jim's chair was in a white-knuckle grip until a sharp pain popped in her fingers.

Charlie was shaking her hand out as she exclaimed, "Jim, do something!"

His gaze flickered to hers before it switched to the screen.

"_No. If you beam me back, he dies! Just let me do it!"_ Carol ordered as she worked to deactivate the torpedo.

"_Ten, nine, eight.._." McCoy began to count down, a rhythm that seemed to match the steady pounding in Charlie's ears.

"Standing by to transport Dr. Marcus on your command, sir," Sulu said.

"_Four, three..."_

"_Shit!_" came the expletive just as the timer hit 2.57 seconds and a large DEACTIVATED sign flashed.

Everyone let out a deep breath as Sulu confirmed, "Deactivation successful, Captain." Both Uhura and Charlie grasped each other's hands and their heads' dipped onto the other's shoulders in relief. _That was far too close for comfort._

She stepped down next to Jim, her hand gripping his yellow covered bicep as he asked, "Dr. McCoy, are you alright?" A moment of silence caused Charlie's hand to tense. "Bones?

"_Jim? You're gonna wanna see this,_" McCoy answered.

"What is it?" the captain asked, rising from his slumped position over the console.

"_It's a body,_' Bones answered. "_A very frozen body._"

"Marcus?" Charlie whispered, her thought's flashing back to her sessions in his office, and then her conversation with Harrison. The torpedoes. Everything seemed to boil down to those damned torpedoes.

"Get back to the ship ASAP," Jim ordered, flicking a curious glance in Charlie's direction. "I want a full diagnostic work up of that torpedo, preferably without blowing the ship up. Mr. Spock and I will meet you in sickbay." A chorus of 'aye's' was heard as he deactivated the comm channel with the shuttle. "Keep an eye on them, Mr. Sulu."

The helmsman nodded while Jim spun on his heel, jogging up the stairs to the turbolift. "Spock with me," Jim called. Charlie contemplated the newest revelation a moment before she hurried after the two men, wedging herself between the doors of the turbolift. "Charlie—"

"I have a hunch about something," she cut off the captain. "Please, humor me."

Jim mulled the thought a moment before he nodded, turning to face the door as he hit the button for deck seven as Charlie mimicked his pose, her lip drawn between her teeth as she ignored the curious stare boring into the back of her head by the Vulcan. A frozen man in a torpedo was not something one heard about every day, and either Marcus was aware of the bodies inside the missiles, since she assumed it wasn't just one, or someone else put them there. The question was why Harrison would, since he appeared the next logical choice. It seemed Harrison was just one big question of why.

Charlie was just thinking of how to find another way to sneak down to the brig when the doors to the turbolift opened, and they entered sickbay.

"What have we got?" Kirk asked the minute they stepped into the bustling medical center.

"It's quite clever, actually," Carol explained, carrying a piece of the torpedo to where others of its kind rested. "The fuel container's been removed from the torpedo and retro fitted to hide this cryo-tube."

Charlie paused, her eyes going wide. "A cryo-tube?" she muttered. That was not something she thought existed in the 23rd century when another thought hit her. That was how he did it, of course. That's why Harrison was so interested in how she got to the 23rd century. He must have thought she had been frozen the way he had. The way apparently seventy-two other people had.

"Is he alive?" Kirk asked, Charlie sliding up to stare down at the man locked behind frosted glass.

"He's alive, but if we try to revive him without the proper sequencing, it could kill him," McCoy answered, his stern stare peeking at Charlie. "This technology is beyond on me."

"How advanced, Doctor?" Spock asked.

"It's not advanced," Carol responded. "That cryo-tube is ancient."

"We haven't needed to freeze anyone since we develop warp capability," Bones added. "Which explains the most interesting thing about our friend here. He's three hundred years old."

Jim and Spock stiffened and turned their astonished attention to stare at the surprised Charlie. Her attention moving between the men, she asked, "What?"

"Have you ever come in contact with this type of thing before?" Jim probed, point to the man in the tube.

Charlie mulled the thought, riveted by the idea that the man who slept before them was born in the same century as her. "I'd heard of cryogenics," Charlie answerd. "But I had never come in contact with it before. I mean, it was the most popular during my parent's time; the '70s and '80s and there were rumors all these different celebrities were frozen: Walt Disney, Ted Williams, some others. I didn't think it was actually possible, though, it seemed too Sci-Fi."

"Well somebody got it right," McCoy derided.

"Do you know specifically of anyone cryogenically frozen?" Jim asked.

"No," she shook her head. "Again, it wasn't something that was popular by the 21st century. And I was focused on other things."

Jim glanced back at the man in the tube, his stare hard and unfocused, and Charlie could tell he was debating something. "I think we need to talk to Harrison about this," he finally decided. "Spock, Charlie, with me. Bones and Doctor Marcus, finish working on getting that tube out."

The Vulcan and Human followed their captain out of sickbay back to the turbolift. Charlie was surprised that Jim wanted her along, and she wondered if her earlier conversation with Harrison was going to come back to haunt her.

"You sure you want me, Captain?" she voiced. "You told me to stay away from Harrison."

"That was before."

"Before?" she prodded.

Jim just held her gaze until the doors of the lift opened, and Jim scrambled toward the bright white holding cell where John Harrison sat, staring at the walls in a bored, detached way.

"Back so soon?" Harrison's attention wandered from the floor to Jim and then Charlie, holding hers a moment longer, a challenge dancing in their depths. She pursed her lips and gave a subtle shake of her head, hoping he understood and that neither of her commanding officers had seen it.

"Why is there a man in that torpedo?" Jim snapped.

Harrison didn't seem surprised by the revelation as the rest of them were, his firm, emotionless stare resting on Jim. "There are men and women in all those torpedoes, Captain. I put them there." Kirk and Spock glanced at each other as Charlie's brow furrowed. Know that they knew who, the question now was why? Why put people in weapons of mass destruction?

"Who the hell are you?"

"A remnant of a time long past. Genetically engineered to be superior, so as to lead others to peace in a world at war." His attention moved to Charlie's where she held it without blinking, lifting her chin and glaring back.

"But we were condemned as criminals," Harrison continued, sliding from her to Spock and Jim. "Forced into exile. For centuries we slept, hoping when we awoke things would be different. But as a result of the destruction of Vulcan, your Starfleet began to aggressively search distant quadrants of space. My ship was found adrift, I alone was revived."

"Ensign Noland looked up John Harrison," Jim said jerking his head in her direction. "Until a year ago he didn't exist."

"Noland? You are a Noland." For the first time since his presence came onboard, Harrison looked genuinely surprised, raking his stare over her body as he stood, towering over her. But this time it was different, for more calculating as his eyes roamed over her form, seeing it in a new light.

"Yes." Charlie answered, lifting her chin and staring the man down. Why would her name mean anything to him? The only reason she hadn't told him before was that she didn't want the link to Jim if had come asking.

"You are not related to Robert Noland, General of the US Air Force from my time?" he continued.

Charlie hesitated. That name was not something she thought she would ever hear in the 23rd century. "How do you know my father?"

"Charlie," Jim warned.

Harrison's head lilted to the aside, analyzing her. "Your father? You . . . are his daughter?"

She hesitated and her gaze wavered as her fists clenched and released, debating what to say. "Yes," she acknowledged more of a challenge than admittance.

"You are Charlotte." Charlie's eyes widened and she took a step back from the man as if he was a disease. Harrison grinned, his stare sparking with undisclosed predatory delight. "I've waiting a long time to meet you."

"Alright, that's enough," Kirk barked, stepping between Charlie and the augment, not thrilled by the association between the two. "How do you know Charlie?"

"I don't _know_ him," Charlie denied with force. "I've never even heard of him before he attacked Headquarters."

"Pity. I know all about you, and your family," Harrison leered.

"Yeah, well, take a number," she snapped, leaning around Jim to glare at the augment. "You wouldn't be the first."

Harrison grinned then. "That does not surprise me. You're family's reputation is well known. Marcus was right; the possession of a Noland is truly a treasure of military strength."

"Stop it." Charlie ordered, trying to step around Kirk but he braced his arm out to hold her back. "I don't know how you know me or my family, but you have no right to talk about them; any of them."

"You'll find I do." Khan smirked, his attention shifting from Charlie to Jim. "John Harrison was a fiction created the moment I was awoken by your Admiral Marcus to help him advance his cause. A smokescreen to conceal my true identity. My name is Khan."

Charlie fell back from the glass as her eyes widened beyond surprise. They were now full of fear. She knew Khan. Everyone knew Khan from that quintessential cinematic moment when Prime Universe Kirk draws out his name in one long shout. She knew how dangerous he was. There may not have been augments in her world, but she knew the potential they had. She remembered her brother telling her about genetic engineering after one of his theoretical courses at West Point. With the manipulation of genetics, a country could create the perfect super soldier, one not so different from the man that stood before her.

"Why would a Starfleet admiral ask a three-hundred year old frozen man for help?" Kirk challenged, attempting to draw the attention away from Charlie and the direct focus Khan had on her.

"Because I am better."

"At what?"

"Everything. Alexander Marcus needed to respond to an uncivilized threat in a civilized time, but for that he needed a warriors mind, my mind, to design weapons and warships."

"You are suggesting the Admiral violated every regulation he vow to uphold simply because he wanted to exploit your intellect," Spock argued, the very thought of an admiral forgetting protocol sent his hackles rising.

"He wanted to exploit my savagery," Khan explained as if it was the simplest explanation in the world. "You know all about that, don't you _Ensign Noland._" There was something about his knowing stare that made Charlie anxious, her eyes full of a fear she couldn't control. "Intellect alone is useless in a fight, Mr. Spock. You…You can't even break a rule, how would you be expected to break bone? Marcus used me to design weapons, to help him realize his vision of a militarized Starfleet. That is why he wanted your precious, little ensign, Captain." His eyes shifted to Charlie who stood stoically to the side, scowling at the man. She was trying desperately to deny the truth she heard in his words. "A Noland whose family's reputation is written in blood that dates back into the dark horizon of human history."

"Okay hold it, how do you know so much about Charlie and her family?" Kirk asked, making sure to keep his body between Charlie and Khan. "Speak, Murderer."

Khan squared his shoulders as he regarded Charlie with disdain. "General Robert Noland of the United States Air Force, Charlotte's _father,_ was the mastermind behind the air raid that would end my reign of those inferior to me and my people. He was the one to force us into the cryo-tubes and engineered for us to be sent into space, to find our own world. He kept it quiet of course. It wasn't the most popular idea in that time."

"My dad did that?" Charlie asked, unable to conceal her astonishment. She had no idea her parallel universe dad was such a badass; far more than the one she left behind. He took on Khan, he was the reason for the _Botany Bay_, and that got her thinking. If she had a parallel universe father, did she exist in the universe at some point? She had to. How else did McCoy get ahold of her information when she was first brought aboard?

"And far more," Harrison growled, dragging her from her thoughts.

"You didn't know any of this?" Kirk dropped his voice in bewilderment, turning to Charlie.

She shrugged, uncomfortable by the turn of the conversation and the scrutiny those in the room gave her. She had to think of something, and think of it quick. "No, I didn't." Well, that was true. "I'm mean my dad wasn't one to keep his . . . accomplishments quiet –"

"And yet you have never heard of me," Khan interrupted.

"Shut up," both Charlie and Jim ordered. "But I don't know anything about this," she continued, trying to keep to the lie she knew she had to play.

"I don't understand, how do you know nothing of the Eugenics War? You were alive when they were happening."

"I just don't, Jim," she accentuated, her eyes shifting from Khan's perceptive gaze to the captain's.

Jim bore into Charlie, and she knew he was using the 'captain's stare', a technique he tapped when he tried to wrench something from her she didn't want to share, but this time she couldn't cave. There was too much, too many secrets she had kept from him about her universe and the life she left behind for her to let it all out now.

"How do you know Admiral Marcus requested Ensign Noland?" Spock asked, his eyes shifting between Khan and the pair.

Khan smirked. "Should I tell him?" he turned his question to Charlie.

The silence that descended was as crushing as the gravity on Jupiter. "You spoke to him?" Kirk rounded on her, causing her stumble back a few paces until she was between him and Spock. "After I ordered you not to?"

Charlie's eyes went wide by the venom in his tone. "Jim, I—"

"Captain," he snarled. "You will address me as Captain, Ensign."

"I'm sorry, Captain," she said, shrinking under his furious glare with her hands held up for protection. "But I did it to help you. To help this ship."

"Please, Captain," Khan intervened, gaining Kirk's attention. "Charlotte here may have disobeyed you, but her loyalty stands. She even tried to protect you from Marcus, useless as it is. You see he sent you to use those weapons, to fire my torpedoes on an unsuspecting planet. And then he purposely crippled your ship in enemy space, leading to one inevitable outcome. The Klingons will come searching for whomever was responsible, and you would have no chance of escape. Marcus would finally have the war he always wanted."

"No," Kirk denied, his attention fully focused on the warrior in his brig. "No. I watched you open fire in a room full of unarmed Starfleet officers. You killed them in cold blood!"

"Marcus took my crew from me!" Khan spat, turning from them.

"You are a murderer!"

"He used my friends to control me," he confessed, breathing heavily while he attention was riveted on the wall in front of him. Charlie's head cocked to the side when she heard the desperation and fear in his voice, unwillingly brought closer to the glass of his prison while Khan further explained, "I tried to smuggle them to safety by concealing them in the very weapons I had designed. But I was discovered, I had no choice but to escape alone. And when I did, I had every reason to suspect that Marcus had killed every single one of the people I hold most dear. So I responded in kind." As he turned, Charlie saw the trail tears had left down Khan's cheeks, his eye rimmed in red but his stare poignant and strong. "My crew is my family, Kirk. Is there anything you would not do for your family?"

Jim glanced in Charlie's direction, her hand over her mouth and her eyes wide by his admission.

Suddenly Sulu's voice was filling the brig. "_Proximity alert, sir. There's a ship at warp heading right for us._"

"Klingons?"

"At warp?" Khan injected, rushing to the glass. "No, Kirk. We both know who it is."

"_I don't think so; it's not coming at us from Qo'nos._" Charlie dropped her hand, her breathing increasing while the tingling bit of fear spread down her legs and over her chest as if she just jumped into ice.

Jim paused a moment then spun.

"Lieutenant, move Khan to medbay, post six security officers on him," he ordered as he took off running towards the bridge, Spock hot on his trail.

"Yes, Captain," the crewmember replied, staring at the retreating back of the captain.

"Belay that order," Charlie said, her stare never leaving Khan's. "I will take him. Have security meet us here to transport him to sickbay."

"But Ma'am, the captain ordered—"

"I know what the captain ordered," she snarled, her hardened glare snapping to the lieutenants who shrunk down in his chair by her intensity. "And you are fulfilling those orders through me. Understand?"

"Y-yes, Ma'am," he responded, quickly hitting the button to patch through to security.

"Well, there's a Starfleet officer in there after all," Khan remarked as the security filed into the room and the wall was dropped, releasing him into their custody.

Charlie ordered the move to sickbay before she responded. "It was always here. I am a Noland."

"That you are," he agreed, staring at her while they walked towards the lift.

"Let's get one thing straight, Khan. I am sorry about what happened to your crew. Truly, I am; what Marcus did doesn't surprise me and I don't condone it. However, if you even attempt to hurt _my_ crew, to hurt the Captain, I swear to all that is holy you will be praying it's my father you're dealing with. Understand?"

Charlie noticed the barest hint of a smirk before he dipped his head in a small nod. "Of course, Charlotte."


	13. Chapter Thirteen: Into the Open Air

**Chapter Thirteen: Into the Open Air**

Jim must have informed Doctor McCoy of Khan's arrival because the minute they entered Sickbay, Charlie noticed a biobed cordoned off with ample room for security to stand around.

"Sit," she ordered, grabbing Khan's arm and directing him to the bed.

"Relax, Charlotte. I'm not going anywhere," Khan explained with an air of distain, although he did sit on the requisite bed.

"It's Ensign Noland, Khan, and the 'yet' you didn't say was plainly obvious," she rebuked. He smirked as he adjusted his seat, his back ramrod straight while his eyes roamed over those in sickbay, mainly Carol and Bones, and the cryotube they were investigating.

"You perceive me rather well for an inferior human," he said, his eyes slanting towards hers. "But then again, your father was rather adept at that as well."

Charlie scowled, her arms crossing over her chest. "Tell me what happened," she ordered, meandering so she stood in front of him and stare directly into his cold gaze.

"When?" he asked dismissively, his attention turning back to Carol who had removed the last of the missile pieces surrounding his crew.

"You know when," Charlie snapped. "With my father. What happened?"

The hint of another smirked emerged as Khan turned his steel eyes to hers and she suddenly felt very naked under it. She lifted her chin, unwilling to show any sense of weakness to him. Yes, his circumstances could warrant the behavior he displayed, but she knew Khan always had something up his sleeve to benefit his situation. She trusted him about as far as she could throw him.

"Let's just say he discovered a weakness of mine before I learned of his."

"And what is your weakness?" she challenged.

Khan sneered, and shook his head. "As if I would tell you. Come, Charlotte, I know you are far cleverer than that idiotic question you just asked." A burst of heat rose in her cheeks, her indignation and anger increasing by his patronizing. He either enjoyed his ability to get a rise from her, or he clearly didn't care because he continued as if describing the weather, "We had been playing a form of chess for many years, Charlotte; we were both master's at the game. I have to say I was impressed by his shrewdness. I had yet to come across a non-augment who could even hope to match my level, but he possessed talents I see now run in the blood. And unfortunately for me, that blood allowed him to call checkmate quicker than I. He at least let us take our lives and escape into the unknown."

Charlie considered that depiction of her father a moment before she muttered, "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did he let you live? He must have had orders to destroy you; it's not like him to go against that."

"Simple, Charlotte," Khan shrugged. "Your father was addicted to power, a trait I see in you. How else could he have become a general by the age of thirty-five? He saw us for what we were: superior to all others on Earth. He negotiated for us to escape because to kill us would have rid himself of a valuable ally."

"You're lying," Charlie hissed. "My father would have never betrayed the country he swore in oath too. Never."

"He didn't betray them, Charlotte." Khan paused a moment, a twinkle coming to his eye as it dawned on Charlie what he meant.

She was taken aback by what Khan implied. She could not and would not consider the implications of his deduction, because to do so would make her question everything she had been taught; everything she believed in. "So what was the weakness you were going to use against my father?" she decided on a different approach. "From my experience he didn't have one."

"Everyone has a weakness." Charlie shook her head, her thoughts momentarily thrown back to the man with a permanent scowl on his face and disappointment in his dark brown eyes. "Tell me. How was life in that quaint little town in Colorado?" Khan continued, pulling her from her thoughts. "I bet all those trips around the world as a child were fascinating. Where was your favorite?"

Charlie stumbled back away from the man, her insides squirming with unease by the underlying tone of his words. Deciding distance was the best course for the situation, she turned on her heel after she ordered the security to shoot him if he so much as twitched and made her away over to McCoy with only a subtle glance in Carol's direction.

"How's it going, Spitfire?" McCoy asked as he dived into his microscope, Khan's blood sample next to him.

With flicker of a peek in the augment's direction, she said, "Oh nothing much, just finding out my dad was the main reason we have Khan here to deal with. You know, the usual." She leaned her hips against the table, her eyes trained to her boots as that man's words continued to instill themselves in her consciousness. She knew she shouldn't let him get under her skin, but she was finding it hard to argue against his logic when she saw the same things herself.

"Holding something back, are we?" McCoy remarked as he rose and jotted down something on the PADD next to him.

"Many things, McCoy. Many things."

The bitter tone in her voice had McCoy turning his full attention to Charlie, evident curiosity in his question. "Care to share?"

Charlie snorted. "Do I ever?"

"Sometimes. Hey, it's just me, your, how do you say it?"

"Brother from another mother," she grinned.

"Yeah, that."

"Thanks, Len. I mean it," she added after registering his skepticism. "I just have a few things of my own to figure out first."

McCoy sighed, reaching up to rub his tired eyes. "Listen, Spitfire, I know Jim's being a bit hard, but you have to understand—"

"Not now," she interrupted with a snap, noting the surprise in McCoy. "I'm sorry, just not right now."

The doctor opened his mouth to reply but was cut off as a ship wide broadcast began to air, popping up on all the screens in medical. As Charlie watched an image came up and she reeled back with a gasp when Admiral Marcus's picture filled the screen. She turned back to McCoy, his eyes widening when he noticed the admiral's face filling the monitors.

"Captain Kirk," the admiral said, a shiver on unease rolling down her spine.

The entire room went silent, even the ship unwilling to impart its own sounds besides those of the captain and admiral. A small gasp turned Charlie's attention to the blonde daughter of the man on the display before Jim's voice filtered through sickbay.

"Admiral Marcus, I wasn't excepting you. It's a hell of a ship you got there." The underlying tone of Jim's voice had Charlie reading between the lines, wondering what he was seeing since the screens only displayed the admiral's scowling visage.

"And I wasn't expecting to get word that you'd taken Harrison into custody in violation of your orders," Marcus snapped.

"Well, we uh . . . we had to improvise when our warp core unexpectedly malfunctioned," Jim lied. "But you already knew that, didn't you, sir?"

"I don't take your meaning," Marcus growled.

"Well, that's why you're here, isn't it? To assist with our repairs? Why else would the head of Starfleet personally come to the edge of the Neutral Zone?"

"Nice one," Charlie whispered as she saw that familiar hardening of the Marcus's gaze, a skill she had developed quite well when she was back on Earth.

"Is there something I can help you find, sir?" Jim added.

"Where is your prisoner, Kirk?"

"Per Starfleet regulation, I'm planning on returning _Khan_ to Earth to stand trial."

Marcs sighed, reaching up to rub his eyes as he fell back against his chair. "Well, shit. You talked to him. It's exactly what I was hoping to spare you from. I took a tactical risk when I woke that bastard up, believing that his superior intelligence could help us protect our self from whatever came at us next. But I made a mistake. And now the blood of everybody he's killed is on my hands. So, I'm asking you, give him to me, so that I can end what I started."

"Bullshit," Charlie snapped, louder than she intended when several others in sickbay shot startled glances in her direction, including an annoyed Carol Marcus.

"And what exactly would you like me to do with the rest of his crew, sir?" Jim argued. "Fire them at the Klingons, end seventy-two lives? Start a war in the process?"

Charlie peeked over in Khan's direction, noticing the muscle twitch in jaw. Even if she hated the man with every fiber of her being, killing seventy-two innocent people was murder, plain and simple. They may have committed crimes in the past, but they were shown mercy from her father no less; they didn't deserve to die.

"He put those people in those torpedoes," Marcus continued. "And I simply didn't want to burden you with knowing what was inside of them. You saw what this man can do all by himself. Can you imagine what would happen if we woke up the rest of his crew. What else did he tell you? That he's a peacekeeper? He's playing you, son. Don't you see that? Khan and his crew were condemned to death as war criminals. And now it is our duty to carry out that sentence before anybody else dies because of him.

"Now, I'm gonna ask you again! One last time, son. Lower your shields, tell me where he is."

"He's in Engineering, sir," Jim said, Charlie raising her brow as she turned towards the augment sitting on a bed in sickbay. "But I'll have him moved to the transporter room right away."

"I'll take it from here," Marcus announced before the monitors cut out.

Charlie stared at the black screen, trying to figure out what Jim was thinking. The ship suddenly move to warp, Charlie's startled gaze roaming over those in medical. She didn't mind running from Marcus, in fact it was something she dreamed about since she was pulled from the _Enterprise_, but running was not an act she ever thought Jim would do.

"Well, at least we're moving again," McCoy grumbled, beginning another of his endless tests of the augment.

Khan's eyes roamed over those in front him, detached and emotionless. "If you think you're safe at warp," he announced his gaze hard. He caught Charlie's as she moved to his side, "you're wrong."

Carol and Charlie glanced at each other, both knowing the potential of Marcus and what Khan's threat meant for the ship. They both turned at the same time and rushed from sickbay, intent on the same target.

They didn't speak a word to each other as they rode the turbolift to the bridge. Charlie couldn't tell if she heard Carol's heart beating wildly or her own, the blood in her ears muffling everything outside her own mind. Marcus was going to catch them, that was certain. And if they didn't get to the bridge to warn Jim, all of the lives on the _Enterprise_ could be in jeopardy.

The minute the doors opened Carol shouted, "Permission to come on the bridge." Charlie didn't wait for the go-ahead and plowed past the woman.

"Charlie. Dr. Marcus," Jim said surprised, rising as the two women rushed to his chair.

"We can't outrun him," Charlie declared.

With a small nod, Carol added with a rush, "He's gonna catch us and when he does, the only thing that's gonna stop him destroying this ship is me. So you have to let me talk to him."

Jim flicked his confused gaze between the two women. "We're at warp, he can't catch up with us."

"It's Marcus, Jim," Charlie tried. "He already created advanced torpedoes. It's not so hard to think he hasn't helped his speed at all."

""He's been developing a ship that has advanced warp capabilities," Carol argued, jumping over Charlie. "And I—"

"Captain!" Sulu interrupted, Charlie, Jim, and Carol turning their attention to him. "I'm getting a reading I don't understand."

"What is it?" Charlie asked, jumping down the steps to look at Sulu's console, afraid for what she might see. Just as she leaned over, the ship chasing the _Enterprise_ opened fire, the force of the phaser blasts knocking her out of the warp field and throwing everyone violently to the floor. As Charlie fell, she tried to catch herself on Sulu's console, but the energy caused by the weapon's fire forced her to lose her balance and she landed awkwardly with a distinct pop!

Gritting her teeth against the pain, Charlie stood up cradling her wrist, the bridge awash in red at the alerts sounded and the others scrambling to their seats.

"Why the hell is he firing at us?!" Charlie barked, trying to move the fingers in her left hand and only feeling aching pain.

"Where are we?" Jim asked Sulu, circling around his chair.

"We're 237,000 km from Earth."

"Damage report!"

"Shields are down," Charlie announced, running her fingers across the console nearest her, trying to ignore the fire in her arm.

"Weapons are down," Darwin at the navigation's station said. "We're defenseless, sir."

"Sir, we have a bulk head breach," another crewmember added, rushing from one station to another.

"Where's the damage?" Jim asked, turning to the science officer cattycorner to his hair.

"Major hull damage, Captain," the alien's deep voice answered.

The _Enterprise_ quaked again, Marcus's ship continuing to fire on the defenseless constitution class vessel. Charlie stumbled her way to stand by Jim's side, her brows drawn in apprehension with the continued onslaught of phaser fire, and the evident panic beginning to rise.

"Captain, you have to do something," she pleaded as the ship took another hard hit, throwing her to the side again and jarring her injured wrist. She was shocked by the blatant attack by Marcus, her mind unable to process the chaos that erupted around her and only the pain of her arm keeping her in the moment.

"Evasive maneuvers! Get us to the Earth, right now!" Kirk ordered panicked.

"Captain, stop!" Carol shouted, both Charlie and Jim turning to her even as the ship was still peppered with phaser fire. "Everybody on this ship is going to die if you don't let me speak to him."

Kirk stared at Carol's firm, stubborn gaze and then at Charlie who nodded subtly. "Uhura, hail them."

Carol spun towards the view screen, her voice no longer than of a grown woman but of a little girl, terrified of her father. A voice Charlie knew far too well.

"Sir, it's me. It's Carol."

The firing came to a halt, the _Enterprise_ settling down when Marcus's face was again displayed on the bridge.

"What are you doing on that ship?" he growled while Carol moved closer.

"I heard what you said," Carol answered. "That you made a mistake and now you're doing everything you can to fix it. But, Dad," he voice cracked, unshed tears in her words, "I . . . I don't believe that the man who raised me is capable of destroying a ship full of innocent of people. And if I'm wrong about that, then you're gonna have to do it with me on board."

Marcus seemed to mull that thought for half a second before he stated matter-of-factly, "Actually, Carol, I won't."

Whirling, white lights began to spin around Carol and she held her hands up in shock, spinning towards Charlie and Jim. "Oh! Jim."

"Oh shit!" Charlie exclaimed as Jim snapped, "Can we intercept the transport signal?" Carol turned around and began running as if should could outrun the transporter signal.

"No, sir." Someone answered when Carol was transported away from the ship, Uhura having had to raise her arms in surprise when she thought the weapon's specialist was going to collide with her.

"Carol!" Jim shouted.

"Captain Kirk," Marcus began, his words rushed as if he wanted to be done with the matter and head back towards Earth. "Without authorization and in league with the fugitive John Harrison . . . and is that Noland I see there next to you. Well, well, well, this day is full of surprises. And betrayal."

"Sup, Admiral," Charlie growled, taking a couple steps forward. Her wrist hurt something fierce, but his arrogance, the disregard for Starfleet personnel, and her own personal vendetta sent a spark of confidence over her shoulders. She'd be damned if she cowered before the admiral again, in any situation. "You know, it's not really betrayal when I don't owe any sort of allegiance to you. It was more about seeking justice; something you seem to know nothing about."

"I see you haven't changed much, Miss Noland," Marcus scowled, shaking his head. "You wanna talk about justice? Justice was removing you from that ship before you could use for your own purposes. Justice was making sure you are not like Harrison and his band of miscreants. Justice was protecting the people of the Federation from abominations like you. I don't even want to know what perverse methods you used to get back onboard."

Charlie had never felt such rage as she did in that moment. She hadn't ever put much into the saying of seeing red, but that moment she saw crimson. "You son of a bitch—"

"No, Miss Noland!" Marcus barked, jumping up from his chair and cutting her off. "Don't even try to lecture me with your high and mighty 21st century ways. You are just like Harrison; don't deny it. That vermin did everything he could in order to survive and I see you're no different. How could you have made it out alive from your brush with the Klingons? How else could your father have had the capabilities to defeat Khan without being able to match him as an equal? And then decide to let him and his crew live when the people of your era wanted their blood? It doesn't make sense unless he was in league with them."

"You know _nothing_ of my family," Charlie shouted, her uninjured fist clenched so hard her knuckles were translucent. "How dare you talk about them when you don't have all the facts, _Admiral._ My dad may have been a schmuch of a father but he was one hell of an Airman; I can admit to that. He defeated Khan because he was _smarter than him_, not because of some lab but through evolution. Through the blood of our family, the nobility that comes from being a Noland, which I know you couldn't possibly understand. We live for honor, to protect the innocent, and follow the laws of justice, not warp them to how we see fit. It's that blood that brought me to this century and it was what saved me, not some experiment. I am nothing like Khan, but if being placed in the same category means I'm less like _you_ and the men you represent, then I will gladly hold that claim."

Charlie was panting after her rant, her cheeks stained a bright red and her scowl deep. No one dared move toward her. The captain most of all shocked by her outburst, knowing the lengths she took for propriety (himself notwithstanding) when it came to rank.

The sound of a single clap echoed around the motionless bridge, everyone too shocked by the confrontation between the ensign and the admiral. Startled gazes flickered around with each resonating echo, each person trying to see the orchestrator. Slowly the crew's attention moved back to the screen, realizing it was Marcus who made the sound.

"You have a flare for the dramatic, Miss Noland I will give you that."

"Well thank you," she bowed mockingly.

"But I would have thought our time together would have tempered that dynamic."

"All it did was make me realize that the future isn't that much different than the past," she spat. "That no matter what century you're in, men will still do whatever they can to make themselves the biggest bully in the schoolyard."

"Quaint," Marcus smirked, lightly shaking his head. "If you had only given what I asked, what was required of you then we wouldn't be in this predicament, would we?"

Jim moved forward with hesitant steps. "Charlie, what's he talking about?"

She snapped her head towards Jim, forgetting about the crew of _Enterprise_ in her desire to unleash every pent up emotion she had since her first session with Marcus. When she recognized what she had said, she inwardly recoiled. She had never wanted Jim to know what really happened in the sittings with Marcus, the back and forth they went through as she slowly came to understand he wanted her for more than what he claimed. It was only with the emergence of Khan, and the stakes he held did she figure out the true intentions of the admiral. She couldn't let Jim know that he left her to be the Admiral's pet.

"Ensign, answer me," Jim growled frustrated.

"Perhaps I could be of some assistance?" Spock spoke up as the silence lengthened with Charlie's refusal to answer the Captain. "When I joined Pike's conscious in the last moments of his life, he shared with me the results from his investigation into the truth behind the Admiral's removal of Ensign Noland."

"Was that why he was gone so much the weeks before his death?" Charlie turned to Spock. She hadn't known he had performed a mind meld, but she was curious as to what the Vulcan gained from joining his consciousness with Pike's. And a selfish part of her wanted to know if he was just as sad to be leaving Charlie as she was.

"Yes," the Vulcan acknowledged. "Admiral's Pike investigation led him to Section 31 where he learned more about the experiments completed by Dr. Noland-Spear. They were not for exploration as we had originally perceived, but as a weapon similar to what the Klingons wanted. Commissioned by Admiral Marcus." The crew all turned back to the screen, each in a different state of shock and anger while the man glowered at them all. "You are the only one alive, Ensign Noland, who has any hope of recovering the missing data," Spock added. "The military prowess of your family, the relation to the Boradis system, and the possible collaboration between you and Harrison were all justifications for your internment at Starfleet Headquarters. You are, in effect, the perfect military weapon."

"And why didn't you tell me this before, Spock?" Jim growled as Charlie tried to digest that piece of information. Was the very life force flowing through her veins going to always be the cause of her turmoil? Was she to be controlled by those of the Noland name, both past and present?

"I was waiting for a more suitable opportunity, Captain," Spock added. "You both were emotionally compromised after the death of Admiral Pike; I did not wish to add further injury with the revelation about Ensign Noland."

"We really need to work on your communication, Spock."

"He's right though, Captain," Charlie added, awkward as she turned and addressed him, ignoring the tribulations inside her mind. It may be her kryptonite but being a Noland was always what made her strong. One heart, one way, just as her father always said. "I had my suspicions, but after Pike—"

"You never told me." It was more than the disappointment that sent a knife into Charlie's heart; it was the nodule of betrayal and hurt.

"I couldn't," she confessed, willing him to understand everything she was not telling him. "Not with what you were going through. What _we _were going through, there was too much."

"It is never too much, Charlie. Don't you trust me? Did you think I couldn't save you again?"

"It's not up to you to always save me!" she shouted. Realizing her outburst she added in a more respectable tone, "I had to do this on my own. You never asked to be dragged into something this complicated. He wants me like a broodmare for whatever stupid military agenda he has," she turned to address Marcus then, speaking more to the admiral than the captain, "He did everything he could within the grey areas of legality to get what he wanted. But you got something you hadn't anticipated, right sir? I'm a lot stronger than the Nolands you used before. I won't give you want because you don't deserve it."

"It seems I underestimated your character, Miss Noland," Marcus derided, slouching back against his chair again. "A mistake I won't make again. Captain Kirk, arrest her for conspiracy to commit acts of treason with the known fugitive John Harrison."

"What?" Jim asked dumbfounded, a string of 'no!' sounding from the communication and helm stations.

"You heard me, Son," Marcus snapped.

"I won't. I can't," Jim answered, the shocked tone of his voice replaced by the confident arrogance he was legendary for. "Charlie is an acting ensign for this mission, by my request. She has not acted with Harrison or had any communications with him outside my orders."

"I see," Marcus said. "Well, since you seem to be in league with _two_ Federation fugitives, having gone rogue in enemy territory, you left me no choice but to hunt you down and destroy you. Lock phasers," he said toward his crew.

"Wait, sir," Kirk panicked, running forward to the front of view screen, as if placing himself between Marcus and his crew. "Wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait! Wait!"

"I'll make this quick," Marcus dismissed. "Target all out door torpedoes on the _Enterprise_ bridge."

"Sir, my crew was just . . . was just following my orders," Jim stumbled, a fear Charlie had never heard before poured from his lips with each word as he struggled to save her and everyone else onboard. "Even Charlie; I told her to come with me. I take . . . I take full responsibility for my actions, but they were mine, and they were mine alone. Charlie had nothing to do with this. If I transmit Khan's location to you now, all that I ask is that you spare them." Jim paused, the full weight of his words lingering in the tense atmosphere. "Please, sir. I'll do anything you want. Just let them live."

"Jim," Charlie whispered, wetness blurring her vision both by her fear and the way her heart ached with his plea.

"That's a hell of an apology," Marcus added, more of a brush off than anything else. "But if it's any conciliation, I was never gonna spare your crew. And Miss Noland, you may have been an asset before, now you're just a pain in my ass. Fire at will." Then the screen went black.

Slowly Jim turned around, mirroring the astonishment all on the bridge felt by Marcus's blatant disregard.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"This is bullshit!" Charlie snapped, gaining the startled and despairing attention of those on the bridge. "This is not how this is supposed to happen. We are not supposed to die like this! It's too soon!"

"No one is ever fully aware of their fate, Ensign," Spock said, his voice almost resigned to what awaited him as he came to stand next to Uhura. "How we die is not for us to discover until it is time."

"They're powering up with weapons," Darwin said from her station, her bald, dark head dipping down in fear.

"Some are more fortunate than other's to have a bit of foresight, Commander," Charlie added bitterly. Could it be that the fate of the _Enterprise _crew was slated to die decades before their intention? Had she caused some chaotic rift in the space-time continuum by having more of Jim's attention on her than the ship and crew? She glanced in his direction, his reddened blue gaze full of fear and disappointment. At himself, the admiral, or worryingly her, she had no idea. Charlie just knew if these were to be her last moments alive, whether she was in the 23rd century or the 21st, she wanted to spend them in the arms of the man who held her heart for all time.

Rushing to his side, Charlie buried her head in Jim's chest, her eyes squeezed shut against the pain she knew was coming. Jim's arms held her secure as if saying if he was going to protect one person on his ship, it was going to be her. And then they waited.


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Touch the Sky

**Thank you for all your wonderful reviews! Some of you raise interesting questions that make me go back and reexamine at what I have so they get answered. Keep it up!**

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><p><strong>Chapter Fourteen: Touch the Sky<strong>

Charlie had thought she would see her life flash before her eyes. Isn't that what everyone with near-death experiences said happened? Those early, childhood days of freedom and innocence, when the only care on the world was coming home when the streetlights came on and hoping Brussels sprouts weren't on the dinner table. Of adventures by the lake, camping next to a fire, or the travels around the world. Charlie expected to see Kate and Philippa's smiling faces one more time, or maybe her siblings before the world around dissolved into black. She hoped that next would come a beautiful paradise with Jim next her, and only that thought kept the fear from crushing her down. She was as prepared as she thought she was ever going to be.

Instead, none of that happened. As the seconds ticked by, only the feeling of thick arms squeezing her until it was painful and the anxious beating of her heart still wanting to thrive occupied her consciousness.

"Their weapons are powered down, Sir," Sulu announced, his amazement palpable. Charlie raised her head from where she had crushed it to Jim's sternum, her dark, confused eyes catching those of the helmsman. Charlie considered she might have entered that heavenly place beyond the world of the living, it was too improbable to dream that luck was on their side.

"What do you mean they powered down?" she exclaimed, unwilling to embrace false hope. She didn't think Marcus was a cruel, sadistic man, but he'd do anything for the 'protection' of the Federation.

Then a voice that was like music to Charlie's ears blasted across the speakers as she and Jim broke apart.

"Enterprise_! Can ya hear me_?"

Both Jim and Charlie spun towards the view screen, too surprised to do anything but shout, "SCOTTY!"

"_Guess what I found behind Jupiter?_" the Scotsman whispered, unable to hide the gleefulness from his tone.

"You're on that ship!" Jim exclaimed.

"Thank the Lord there's a Scotsman onboard!" Charlie added with a laugh as Scotty explained, "_I snuck on it, and seeing as I've just committed an act of treason against a Starfleet Admiral, I'd really like to get off this bloody ship! Now beam me out!_"

"You're miracle worker!" Jim laughed, his eyes twinkling as he wink at Charlie, her smile wide and toothy and her eyes shining just as bright. There was hope for them after all! "We're . . . we're a little low on power right now! Just standby! Standby!"

"_What do you mean 'low on power'_?" Scotty snapped and Charlie could picture the look of confusion of his face. "_What happened to the _Enterprise_?_" Before Jim had a chance to answer, Scotty said in a rush, "_I'll call you back_," before his transmission ended with a snap.

"Scotty!" Jim shouted. When there was no reply, Jim nodded to Charlie before he hurried towards the back of the bridge, calling out, "Spock, our ship, how is she?"

"Our options are limited, Captain," the Vulcan answered as she followed Jim onto the platform. "We cannot fire and we cannot flee."

"Is there any power for the transporter, or can we escape in the shuttles?" she tried. They could abandon ship, and as much as the thought sent a rolling wave of nausea through her, their lives were more important.

"We don't have enough power for the transporter and the shuttles would make an easy target for Marcus," Jim said as he flicked his eyes around, thinking. Charlie noticed the moment a light bulb went off in Jim's head, his confident stare snapping to Spock. "There is one option. Uhura, when you get Scotty back, patch him through."

"Yes, sir," Uhura answered, rushing to her station.

"Mr. Spock, you have the conn."

The captain moved across the bridge and into a turbolift, both Charlie and Spock flanking his sides, sharing furtive glances toward each other.

"Why do I have a feeling what's going on in your head is probably a really bad idea?" Charlie pointed out as soon as the doors shut.

"That is because, Ensign, it usually is," Spock agreed.

Jim rolled his eyes. "Works though, doesn't it?"

"Captain, I strongly object," Spock frowned.

"To what? I haven't said anything yet," Jim responded evasively. Charlie knew that tone. She could see the way Jim refused to meet her or Spock's eyes. Whatever plan was going on in that genius head of his, she knew she was not going to like it. Not one little bit.

"Since we cannot take the ship from the outside, the only way we can take it is from within," Spock reasoned, his gaze flicking to Charlie's once in a while to try to pull her into the argument, logically using their relationship to his advantage. "And as a large boarding party would be detected, it is optimum for you take as fewer members of the crew as possible," the doors hissed opened onto a chaotic conglomerate of personnel, Jim speed walking down the corridor with Spock and Charlie trying to keep up. "You will meet resistance, requiring personnel with advanced combat abilities and innate knowledge of that ship. This indicates that you plan to align with Khan, the very man we were sent here to destroy."

Charlie balked at the thought. In no universe would Jim associate with murderer of Pike, not one.

"I'm not aligning with him," Jim growled. "I'm using him. The enemy of my enemy is my friend."

"An Arabic proverb attributed to a prince who was betrayed and decapitated by his own subjects," Spock derided.

"Still, it's a hell of a quote."

"Captain, you can't be serious," Charlie tried, increasing her speed to walk more at Jim's side as they slid around the corner, Jim's intention the sickbay where Khan was still under security's watchful care.

"I will go with you, Captain," Spock announced.

"You won't have to, Spock," Charlie interjected, her hand raised in front of the commander. "I will go."

"No, you won't, Charlie," Jim ordered.

"If you're about to take a leap of faith, seems fitting I go with you," she argued.

"I cannot allow you to do this," Spock tried again, his glare shooting between herself and Jim as he grabbed Jim's shoulder. "Either of you. It is my function aboard this ship to advise you on making the wisest decisions possible, something I firmly believe you are incapable of doing in this moment."

Charlie raised her brows in surprise, having never heard Spock call out Jim in such a fashion before. It seemed to have finally gained the captain's attention because the man stopped and spun on his heel, coming right into Spock's face and forcing Charlie to stumble back against the wall before she was crushed between the two males.

"You're right!" Jim barked, his eyes hardened to blue steel against the Vuclan's argument. "What I'm about to do, it doesn't make any sense, it's not logical, it is a gut feeling!" Jim paused, his stare moving between Charlie and Spock's concern. "I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. I only know what I can do. The _Enterprise_ and her crew needs someone in that chair who knows what he's doing." Jim landed his attention onto the Vulcan, his vulnerability surprising Charlie. "And it's not me. It's you, Spock."

Before either Charlie or Commander Spock could form a coherent thought after the bombshell Jim had laid at their feet, he had stomped away, turning the corner before either of the pair moved.

"I know it's not my place, Commander, but I think it's time you call up the big guns for this," Charlie said, turning to the Vulcan, her mind already contemplating the disaster Jim was walking into. This went beyond her and while she would not compromise her secret, she could at least point Spock in the right direction. They were all still young, without the benefit of years in space the same way the original crew had. Even though the suggestion tasted like sawdust in her mouth, Charlie was backed into a corner.

"I am unsure by what you mean, Ensign," Spock frowned.

"What I'm saying is that there is _someone_ out there who may have had contact with Khan before Marcus," Charlie confided, giving Spock a very poignant stare. "Someone who may be able to answer the questions I know are swirling in your head. You and I both know not to trust Khan, but I think _he_ can give you the reasons I can't."

His head tilted to the side, a subconscious move Charlie attributed to processing all the scenarios she had just given him. "You say 'can't' as if you are unwilling to share."

"I say can't because it's the truth, Commander," Charlie stressed. "I've already gone past what I swore I wouldn't do since I arrived on this ship because you need the help. If this ship and the crew on it are going to survive, you _need_ to talk to him. I can't tell you more because I'm protecting you, the Captain, and the rest of the crew. You're gonna have to have faith in me. That's all I can tell you."

Spock only spent a few more lingering seconds staring into Charlie's pleading dark eyes before he stood taller, clasping his hands behind his back. "Very well, Ensign," he nodded. "I will trust your judgment on this. I had considered contacting New Vulcan, and I believe now may be a more opportune time."

Charlie relaxed. "I know you will find your answers, Spock. You're one hell of a Starfleet officer; I think that's why Jim trusts you as much as he does."

His gaze flicked above her head in the direction Jim had disappeared. With a small nod, Spock brought his dark gaze back to Charlie before he reversed course to head back to the bridge. He hesitated a moment, however, turning back as Charlie moved to follow the captain.

"Ensign," he called, gaining her attention.

"Yes, Sir?"

"We will discuss this further. I understand your hesitation, but it may be prudent you divulge what information you know."

"You may ask whatever you like," Charlie shrugged. "Doesn't mean I will always answer."

Spock considered the thought before dipping his head in response. "We shall see, Ensign." With brisk steps, Spock proceeded to the turbolift for the bridge.

With one problem relatively solved, Charlie spun and chased after Jim, slowing to a strong walk when the movement jarred her injured wrist. She knew Spock was going to have questions. She had a feeling a lot of the crew would once they pieced together her tyraid on the bridge, and she decided that she could give Spock at least a few pieces of her story without the whole pie. Just enough that would satisfy his curiosity without giving much away. She was becoming rather adept at it.

Rounding the corner, Charlie spotted Jim just about to walk through sickbay's doors.

"Captain!" she called as she rushed towards him, Jim spinning in surprise by Charlie's shout.

"Charlie? I thought you had returned to the bridge with Spock," he said, stepping back into the hallway.

"I need to talk to you," she responded.

Jim rolled his eyes. "Not right now, Charlie. I don't have time for this."

"Then make time," she growled, grabbing onto his arm as he turned away from her. "I don't know what your problem with me has been lately, but it's really getting annoying. Whether or not you agree, I'm trying to help you, and all I'm getting is a goddamn brush off. You told me to be open with you, remember? Yet when I do, you're shooting me down as if I don't understand what I'm talking about. I know we are in a hell of a predicament, but this isn't your fault so stop acting like it is."

"Isn't it?" Jim retorted, his brows low and his arms crossing across his broad chest. "I'm the captain and I can't keep my crew safe. I just about had everyone killed, you included, and if I don't get Khan to help me, we all could still die."

"We aren't going to die, Jim. We can't," she affirmed. She knew she was grasping at straws, but her gut told her that they were not going to go down, not yet.

"Then what the hell am I supposed to do?" Jim challenged. "You said you've been trying to help me, but you've causing more problems than you've fixed. You won't listen to me, you won't obey my orders, and I'm trying to figure out why you're here right now. Did Marcus plant you like those torpedoes?"

Charlie gaped at the captain, taking a purposeful step backwards. "How could you think that? How could you even contemplate the very notion that I would work for a man I despise almost as much as Khan? I'm may be new to this role of Starfleet; I was raised with a different type of military mentality, but that doesn't mean I would align myself with that . . . that . . . _man._"

Jim stood his ground, his hands moving to his hips, but she watched as a definitive slump came to his shoulders, his elbows sagging and the muscle in his jaw relaxing. "Okay, you're right, that's a stupid accusation and I'm sorry. But I let you come with us because you understand combat better than anyone else on this ship. We're explorers, we were trained for defense strategy, not offensive, but your blatant disregard to my authority will not hold, Charlie. It won't. I will have McCoy sedate you and send you to the brig if you force me too, understand?"

Charlie reeled from his threat, the firm, unforgiving tone and the hard packed glare showed no room for negotiation. With a sudden, paralyzing fear, Khan's words echoed, shinning Jim in a new and terrible light. The hardness he exuded was erringly similar to another man trying to destroy them all.

"I will apologize for disobeying you," she admitted, shaking the thought away. She wouldn't believe it was possible. Not yet. "But I think you will understand asking for forgiveness instead of permission. I did what I felt needed to be done to relieve some pressure off you, and answer a few questions of my own. You are partly right; I did what I did because of Marcus. I knew something was up from his questioning when I was on Earth. The debriefings were not what you told me to expect, and that raised my suspicions. Add in Khan to the mix and well—"

"You needed to stop whatever was happening," Jim said, realization dawning on his face.

"Yes," Charlie nodded. "Cor unum, Jim. I needed to stop Khan before he hurt more of the people I loved. I didn't know about the connection with Marcus until this mission, and it makes the potential so much more terrifying. I'm scared, Jim, and I don't have all the answers, but I do know we can't trust Khan. He's using you to get at Marcus. Who's to say he won't turn on you when given the opportunity?"

"Well maybe it's time we manipulate him for a change."

"Going over there is suicide."

"I know, but what choice do we have?" Jim barked his frustration and anger back to the forefront. "I don't trust him either, but unless you can pull another escape plan out of that military head of yours, we. Have. No. Choice."

Charlie shook her head, her jaw clenching as she grounded her teeth in frustration. There had to be a plan, another idea than what Jim proposed, but every military strategy she could think of involved the ability to move, something the _Enterprise_ could not do.

"Jim, please, I –"

"Drop it, Charlie," he snapped, his hand raised between them. "I'm going with him and that's final."

"I was going to say I want you to be careful," Charlie growled. "Watch your back."

Jim stared at her a moment and turned, ready to enter sickbay when he paused and spun back towards Charlie. "What did you mean by having a bit of foresight?"

Charlie's gaze snapped up, her eyes going wide. "Uhhh when?"

"On the bridge." Jim's brows drew low over his eyes as he took a step closer to her, his head tilting as if seeing Charlie in a new light. "When you said that it wasn't time for us to die because you had foresight of it. How did you?"

"That was just the heat of the moment," she defended, taking a subtle step backwards. She knew she shouldn't have said anything, but in that moment she couldn't stop herself. An icy lace of fear rushed through Charlie's blood at the skeptical glare Jim gave her.

"What are you hiding?"

Charlie thought about dodging around him and going into sickbay. She did need McCoy to look at her swollen wrist, and Jim needed to get moving since they only had one plan going, but she knew she wouldn't be able to avoid him forever. Jim had a stubborn streak, and once he got something in his head, he wouldn't forget it.

Rising her gaze to meet his, Charlie answered, "I'm not hiding anything. I don't know what's going to happen. If I did, do you think we'd be in this situation?"

"No, I suppose not," Jim consented with a sigh, although he continued to shoot suspicious glances toward her. Shaking his head, Jim stood taller, his shoulders arching back as he muttered, "alright, let's get this over with."

Stepping into the medical facility, their eyes were drawn to the stoic man on the biobed. Jim glimpsed at Charlie, a warning in his blue eyes before they headed over to Khan. Jim stepped in front of his eye line, giving Khan no choice but to focus on the captain.

"Tell me everything you know about that ship," Jim ordered. Charlie stepped up to Jim's side, her wrist still cradled against her chest, but all of her attention rested on the augment.

"Dreadnought Class, two times the size, three times the speed. Advanced weaponry, modified for minimal crew. Unlike most Federation vessels, it's built solely for combat." Charlie felt her breath catch in her throat by the sheer magnitude of their opponent. Those spects alone made it an adversary of the _Enterprise-D_, let alone their little ship.

"I will do everything I can to make you answer for what you did." Jim paused, allowing his threat to permeate the air. With a subtle peek to Charlie, who glared at Khan, he added. "But right now I need your help."

"In exchange for what?" Khan prompted.

"How about I don't send a screwdriver through your skull?" Charlie quipped.

"Ensign," Jim warned, holding his hand up to prevent Charlie's tirade. She snapped her mouth closed, but continued to scowl with all the force in her being. "You said you'd do anything for your crew. I can guarantee their safety."

"Captain," Khan purred, dismissing the idea the minute Jim said it. "You can't even guarantee the safety of your own crew." Khan smirked, his stare shifting to Charlie who, with the maturity of a four-year-old, stuck out her tongue.

"Bones, what are you doing with that tribble?" Jim barked just as movement from her periphery caught Charlie's eye, and she watched as Doctor McCoy held a sample of bright red blood and a puffball.

"The tribble's dead," McCoy answered matter-of-factly, shoving the needle of his syringe into the flesh of the creature in front of him. "I'm injecting Khan's platelets into the deceased tissue of a necrotic host. Khan's cells regenerate like nothing I've ever seen and I wanna know why."

Jim stepped closer to the augment, challenging the man to turn him down. "You coming with me or not?"

"I must say, Kirk," Khan remarked, shifting his gaze from the captain to Charlie. "You can be pretty . . . _persuasive_."

"Good, then suit up," Jim ordered, turning to the security to have them escort him and the prisoner down to one of airlocks.

"Captain." Charlie grabbed Jim's arm and pulled him away from the augment who had risen from the biobed, straightening his shirt and pants as he waited. "Watch your back, alright? We may have no choice, but remember he'll be using you just like you're using him."

Jim nodded, reaching up to brush a lock of hair behind her ear. "Don't worry, I have this under control. Just make sure Spock doesn't break my ship before I get back."

Charlie tried to smile, but the intensity of the situation, and magnitude if Jim should fail kept all humor from her. When they made it to the other side, when both Marcus and Khan would pay for what they did, then Charlie could relax. Until that moment, however, she was faced with anxiety and uncertainty, and no amount of Jim's false bravado could change that.

Releasing her, Jim and Khan exited sickbay, both facing forward as if readying themselves for the fight they were going to face. Before the doors shut, Khan glanced back over his shoulder as they turned, his eye catching Charlie. He dipped his head towards her and was gone, a feeling of uneasiness washing over her like an icy wave from the ocean. She tensed, her hands clenching until pain radiated from her wrist, reminding her part of the reason why she was down there.

"Hey, Doc," she called, gaining McCoy's attention from his stiff and fluffy paperweight. "Think you could do something about this wrist?" She held up the swollen appendage, McCoy shaking his head as he stood and grabbed a tricorder.

"Can't go a day without injuring yourself, can you?"

"I should have a shirt that says I do my own stunts," she joked as he scanned her wrist, applying gentle pressure to different swollen spots. She hissed and tried to jerk her hand away when he hit a particularly tender place.

"Relax," McCoy growled, replacing his tricorder for a handheld device that looked like a wand with a wide tip at the end. "You popped a ligament in your wrist. I'm just going to reset it and strengthen it." The wand made a buzzing sound when he turned it on, a dim light shining from the end. Running the tip up and down her arm, Charlie felt a something deep inside began to move, the feeling not painful but unpleasant. Just when it got to the point of pain, heat surged into her wrist, soothing the sensation away.

"All done," McCoy remarked, placing the wand back into its holder. "See that wasn't so bad, but I'm going to have you wear this," he held up a brace, "it'll help bring the swelling down and keep it in place until the ligament sets."

"Thanks," Charlie said, sliding the brace on and wincing as an intense cooling sensation penetrated her arm.

"_Doctor McCoy and Ensign Noland to the Bridge._"

"Well, guess that's us, Spitfire," McCoy remarked as he removed his blue gloves and silver overcoat, throwing on his, science shirt and hiking towards the doorway. "Wonder what that green-blooded hob-goblin wants. You comin'?"

Charlie nodded, following the doctor through the ship and onto the bridge. She stumbled as the ship shifted, grabbing onto McCoy for stability. He smirked as he helped her right herself. "Might want to speed up production on that shirt, huh?"

"Bite me," she snapped as McCoy laughed.

As they passed through the double doors, Spock sent an acknowledging dip of his head in their direction. McCoy took up position on the railed, his large hands gripping the bannister in a white knuckle grip while Charlie headed over to Uhura.

"Hey," Charlie greeted. "What's the status right now?"

"They just aligned the ship so that Kirk and Khan have a direct line to the access port," Uhura answered as she fiddled with the controls of her station, her hand moving to push her personal speaker into her ear before adjusting other controls. "Hey, hit that switch right there," she pointed. Charlie stood and flicked a red lever before taking her seat next to the woman. "Thanks."

"Anytime," Charlie responded, only remotely hearing the conversation between Scotty and the captain.

"Ensign Noland," Spock called, spinning his chair toward her.

"Got to go, duty calls," Charlie said rising, Uhura waving distractedly with her attention on the console. "Yes, Commander?"

"Check the field between us and the enemy ship," he ordered, indicating an empty console. "I need to understand what type of hazards the captain may need to navigate through."

"Yes, sir," she nodded, jogging down to the computer. Her fingers were becoming more adept to the movements as she used the scanners across the no-man's-land between the _Enterprise_ and the _Vengeance._ The picture that began to emerge was rather bleak and Charlie shook her head as she tried to isolate a path. "It's not good, Commander," she called. "I'm reading hundreds of pieces of debris between us and Marcus. Some are minor, but there are few rather large chucks floating out there." She stopped; her hands paused above the screen. She turned to Spock concerned, her lip between her teeth. "It's like a maze, Sir. They're gonna have a hell of a time."

"Great," Charlie heard McCoy sigh.

"Thank you, Ensign. Send the data to Mr. Sulu so he can create a path."

Charlie nodded, and with a few deft finger strokes, Sulu had pulled up the information and was already designing a flight plan. Charlie pushed away from the computer and headed up the step, standing behind Spock and crossing her arms as she considered the monumental task of just getting to the other ship, let alone what has to be done once he's there.

"Captain," Spock said, hitting a button on the hand console on the chair. "Before you launch you should be aware, there is a considerable debris field between our ships."

"_Spock, not now_," Jim barked. "_Scotty, are you good_?"

"Well at least it's not just me," charlie remarked dryly.

"_It's not easy! Just give me two seconds, alright, ya mad bastard_!"

Charlie snorted, quickly covering her mouth as Spock sent her an unamused glare across his shoulder. She was still trying to reign in her amusement, Scotty always being a source of entertainment when McCoy brushed past her and knelt next to the captain's chair.

"Tell me this gonna work," he mumbled.

"I have neither the information nor the confidence to do so, Doctor," Spock replied

McCoy's glare at the Vulcan was almost as amusing as Scotty's earlier comment. "Boy, you're a real comfort," the doctor growled with a light shake of his head as he stood..

"_Spock, pull the trigger,_" ordered Jim, his voice holding a trace of uncertainty. Charlie didn't know if she was able to recognize the slight waver because she was so close with him, but a glance at McCoy's scowling face told her that at least she wasn't alone.

"Yes, Captain." Spock paused a moment, and Charlie could see the first traces of reluctance as his hand stilled above the lock. The hesitation only lasted a moment before the commander said, "Launching activation sequence on three . . . two . . . one."

Then both Kirk and Khan were hurled into space.


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Legends are Lessons

**Chapter Fifteen: Legends are Lessons**

The bridge was silent at first, everyone collectively holding their breath as the two tiny triangles labeled Kirk and Khan inched their way across the main screen. Charlie couldn't shift her focus from Kirk's signal, too afraid that if she glanced away for a moment, he would be gone. The deafening stillness made the pounding in her ears all the louder, and she wondered if the others could hear her ragged gasps as she attempted to keep herself under control. As he walked behind her, McCoy grabbed her arm and snagged her attention.

"C'mon, Spitfire," he said, directing her over to one of the clear paneled stations. "We'll monitor Jim over here; might make it a bit easier." Although he didn't say it, Charlie gave him a grateful smile at his thoughtful gesture. At least this way, Charlie felt like she had a hand in keeping Jim alive.

Only a moment passed before a crewmember in red shouted, "Sir, Kirk is headed for collision at point four three two."

"Captain, there is debris directly ahead," Spock relayed, urgency in his tone.

"_Copy that_," Jim replied and Charlie watched as his little dot on the panel jerked to the side, his line of projection now pointing him away from the _Vengeance._

"Whoa, Jim!" McCoy shouted. "You're way off course!"

"_I know, I know! I can see that!_" Jim snapped.

"Don't they have a guide or something in their helmets?" Charlie whispered by McCoy's side.

"Use your display compass, Captain," Sulu said not a moment later.

"Well that answers that."

"You must correct precisely thirty-seven point two-four-three degrees."

"_Got it_," Jim answered, his dot beginning to curve towards the point of entry. "_I'm working my way back. Scotty, are you going to be ready with that door, right?_" he shouted. Instead of a jovial comeback or grumpy remark, the captain was answered with silence. "_Mr. Scott, where are you_?"

Charlie felt her heart rate increase and the back of her legs light up with goosebumps as she and the doctor shared worried glances. "Where the hell is he?" she muttered.

"I have no idea," the doctor responded, his forehead wrinkled with concern. "Jim and Khan won't be able to enter that ship without him."

"Captain, he can't seem to hear you," Uhura announced. She had shifted to another chair as she attempted all manner of combinations to locate Scotty through the field of Terran interference. "I'm working on getting his signal back. Standby," she added her arms and fingers moving like a pianist while she manipulated the communications array. Unable to keep still, Charlie took Uhura's other chair, shoving an earpiece into her ear in the process.

"What can I do to help?" she asked, poised for any direction. One of the lessons Pike had given her was the operation of the communications array. Although she couldn't speak the languages of other species, she could manipulate the system and give Uhura's supersonic ears the chance at picking up Scotty's missing communiqué.

"Try narrowing the frequencies on the delta and beta scanners," Uhura ordered, unsurprised by Charlie's request as she pointed to a small monitor on the left. "I'm working on the alpha and gamma ones. I can't tell if all the debris is causing interference with our communicators or not." With a nod, Charlie began dialing in the frequencies to different pitches while they diligently listening for any hint of the Scottish brogue that belonged to their chief engineer.

"_Dammit,_" Jim growled, interrupting the tense calm.

"Captain, what is it?" Spock asked.

"_My helmet was hit. Uhura, tell me you have Mr. Scott back."_

Charlie and Uhura exchanged the same look of apprehension by that news. "Not yet," she answered. "Charlie and I are still working on the signal. His communicator is working; I don't know why he's not responding."

"Where in the hell are you, you bloody Scotsman," Charlie growled in frustration as she tried yet again to utilize the frequency from his last communication. "I don't understand it. It's like the equipment shows he's there, but I can't hear a damn thing!"

"Same here," Uhura nodded. "I don't get it either. He should be able to answer."

Charlie considered that when an unpleasant idea popped in her head. Wrapping her fingers around the microphone on the earpiece, she leaned over and whispered to Uhura, "You don't think someone got ahold of him over there, and that's why he won't answer?"

Uhura stopped, her attention turning to Charlie so swiftly her black ponytail twirled around and almost hit the ensign sitting next to her. "No, it's technical," spinning back to her own monitor she added in an undertone, "it's got to be."

Suddenly the little icon that displayed Khan's position on the main screen disappeared, leaving only Kirk's blinking triangle as they drew closer to the dark, enemy ship. Charlie spun toward the screen when the alert went off, her eyes widening by the loss of the augment.

"Mr. Sulu, did we lose Khan?" Spock asked, and though as a Vulcan he would never vocalize his alarm, he still sat forward and his brows drew together over his concerned, dark eyes.

"I don't know, Commander," Sulu answered, his fingers flying. "I'm having trouble tracking him in all this debris." Charlie turned back to work with Uhura on locating Scotty, but she kept one eye and ear on the escalating problems happening below. She knew Jim was nuts for his plan, and she was beginning to worry that she wouldn't be able to tell how much so in person. But they had the next few minutes to live through, first, if she even wanted to consider the future.

"_Was Khan hit?_"

"We're trying to find him now," Spock answered.

"Captain, you need to adjust your target destination to one-eight-three by four-seven-three degrees," Sulu ordered.

Kirk's signal bobbed and weaved on screen as he avoided the chunks of the _Enterprise_ floating out in space. Charlie had just peeked over to see how much closer he was to Marcus's ship when with the barest hint of alarm, Jim growled, "_Spock, my display is dead. I'm flying blind._"

Charlie froze; her hand hesitating above the display. That was not good, in any way, shape, or form. Uhura snuck a glance, her eyes full of understanding as Charlie tried to keep her breathing regular and mind focused on the task of the missing engineer, but she knew that without the display, Jim was going to have a hell of a time getting to the access porthole.

"Captain, without your display compass, hitting your target destination is mathematically impossible," Spock emphasized.

"_Spock, if I get back, we really need to talk about your bedside manner._"

"_When_ you get back, Captain," Charlie snapped, unable to prevent herself from inputting to the conversation. "I don't want to hear about this _if_ business."

"_Charlie, I'm flying blind with no guide and who the hell knows where Khan is._" There was silence as she just glared at the screen. "_Okay fine,_ when_ I get back._"

"Commander, he's not gonna make it," Sulu muttered, his sight moving between the stoic Vulcan and the anxious woman at the communication station. Charlie checked the path Jim was on and realized Sulu was right. Based on Jim's current flight path, he was either going to miss the ship entirely or bounce of the hull like a Ping-Pong ball. Spock glanced back to Charlie, her search for Scotty completely abandoned as she stared at the tiny dot that was Kirk. She was running through the possibility of using the last of the energy to beam the captain back onto the relative safety of the ship when Khan's indicator flashed back online.

"_My display is still functioning,_" Khan said as if he hadn't just disappeared in space for a whole thirty seconds, letting everyone think who-knows-what happened to him."_I see you, Kirk; you're two hundred meters ahead at my one o'clock. Cut to your left, a few degrees and follow me._"

Charlie was not fond over the idea that Jim had to rely on the augment in order to reach the ship, but what choice did she have? Besides, Khan wouldn't have wasted the energy to report back to the _Enterprise_ if he intended to leave Jim behind. Although, it didn't matter that Jim followed Khan or not if they weren't going to make it onto the ship without Scotty's help.

"Scotty, it's Charlie," she said, her hand shoving the earpiece further into her ear canal as she glanced towards the screen again, opting for a different tactic. She rose and walked to the bannister separating the upper and lower bridge, hoping through sheer willpower that the Scotsman could hear her. "We're having a hard time reaching you, so if you can, please find some way to indicate to us you heard." Silence only came through the system as her breathing increased, and there was no visible sign from the ship. "Mr. Scott, answer me."

"_Scotty, we're getting close, we need a warm welcome. Do you copy?_" Jim added.

"Goddamn, man, answer!" Charlie snapped. Still nothing.

"_Do you copy, Scotty?!_"

Spock and Charlie both glanced to each other. Neither knew what to do, the concern on the bridge so tense it was palpable. Soon, everyone turned to observe the dots of Khan and Kirk as they move ever closer to the ship, wondering if they were about to become the flies on a windshield. "If you can hear us, Mr. Scott," Spock tried, the force in his voice increasing with each word. "Open the door in ten . . . nine . . ."

"_Scotty!_" Jim shouted.

". . . eight . . . seven . . ."

"_Mr. Scott, where are you!_"

". . . six . . ."

"Eighteen hundred meters," a science officer said, although everyone could see from the screen that the distance was closing too fast.

". . . five . . ."

"Sixteen hundred meters."

"_Scotty, where are you?_"

"Four . . . three . . ."

"_Do you copy, Scotty? Please!_"

"Twelve hundred meters."

". . . two . . ."

Spock tensed, his eyes beginning to grow wider. "Mr. Scott, open the door."

"_Open the door!_"

"Mr. Scott, now!" shouted Spock.

"Scotty, come on!" Charlie yelled at the same time.

The triangles indicating Kirk and Khan's position collided with the Vengeance on screen, both flashing before they disappeared. The atmosphere tensed further, everyone holding their breath in muted concentration as they waited for word from their captain. One voice surfaced through the speakers and consoles, and Charlie about fainted when she recognized the brogue.

"_Welcome Aboard_," Scotty greeted.

"They're in," Sulu announced as a collective cheer of relief Rang out. Even the Vulcan in the command chair appeared to relax as his shoulders dipped and the small crease between his slanted brows loosened.

"Seriously? Seriously?! They need to stop these goddamn dramatics," Charlie growled, clutching at her pounding heart as she slumped over the banister. "It does absolutely nothing for my heart."

McCoy smirked, shaking his head at her antics. "Dramatics? You're one to talk Spitfire, slumped over the rail like that."

Charlie harrumphed as she straightened, sticking her tongue out at the surly man as she fixed her dress. "Yes, well, Jim can't have all the fun. And I swear to God, if we live through this, I'm gonna kill him when he gets back. Is he always this crazy?"

"He'll be happy to know that," the doctor responded dryly. "And yes, he is."

"Wonderful."

"Commander, I have that transmission as requested," Uhura announced.

Spock spun towards her, the fingers that gripped the edges of the chair relaxed as he ordered, "On screen, please."

Uhura nodded. "Standby."

A fuzzy image was thrown on the view screen, it pixelating until Uhura narrowed the frequency. As it sharped, a head with dark salt and pepper hair and deep wrinkles materialized. The head came up, slanted eyebrows older but recognizable and deep, familiar eyes full of far more wisdom regarded the scene with the same stoicism as the male on the chair.

"Mr. Spock," he greeted

Charlie could almost hear the smirk in Spock's answer.

"Mr. Spock."

She couldn't stop her own grin that spread across her cheeks, her awe and excitement tempered only through sheer willpower. She had to forcibly remind herself not to bounce on her toes, and she gripped her hands together tightly to stop them from nervously tugging at her dress. She noticed McCoy raising an eyebrow as her antics, but that elated smile was in no way dampened as she stared at a person she believed she would never meet in her life.

"I will be brief," the younger Spock occupying the captain's chair broadcasted. "In your travels, did you ever encounter a man named Khan?"

Spock Prime darkened by the mention of that name. His eyes turned inward as he shook his head, and Charlie knew what no one else did. She knew that the elder Spock was reliving the moment when he sacrificed himself for the crew, a sacrifice that although was reversed, was still traumatizing by any means.

"As you know," he began. "I have made a vow never to give you information that could potentially alter your destiny. Your path is yours to walk and yours alone." He paused; his weighted words caused Spock's shoulders to drop. The commander spun towards Charlie, his brow rose in challenge as if telling her that if Spock Prime wasn't going to answer, she would. "That being said," the elder continued, regaining Spock's attention. "Khan Noonien Singh is the most dangerous adversary the _Enterprise_ ever faced. He is brilliant, ruthless, and he will not hesitate to kill every single one of you."

That appeared to peak Spock's interest. "Did you defeat him?"

Again, there was a flash of remembrance. "At great cost, yes."

"How?"

"In many ways, he killed himself," Spock Prime answered. "Khan and those like him believe themselves to be superior and destroy any they find weaker than themselves. They swarm like a plague and leave nothing but death in their wake." Eyes shifted throughout the bridge, the stillness so complete a pin could have dropped. "He does have a weakness," Spock Prime added. "His overwhelming need for power and vengeance, and the protection of his crew dominate him. Once he is rid of them, he ceases to have a purpose in his mind. But he will do whatever is necessary to destroy you, even if it means it takes his own life."

Charlie thought over their conversations, and knowing what she knew of Khan from her life back in 21st century Earth, she knew what was needed to hold Khan complacent; the same thing Marcus learned. "His crew," she said.

Dark glances were shot her way and Charlie shrugged her shoulders as if to ask 'what?' She hadn't meant to speak aloud, but it was the same idea that had been bouncing around her own skull; she just didn't have the vindication until then.

"The ensign is right, Commander," Spock Prime said, his head dipping towards Charlie who blushed profusely by the acknowledgement. "If you control Khan's crew, you can control him."

"That must have been how my father did it," Charlie added.

Commander Spock's head tilted to the side, as he spun towards her. "Ensign, what are you talking about?"

Her eyes shot between the two Spocks before landing on the commander. "Khan told me that the reason my father was able to defeat him was because he figured out Khan's weakness first. My dad must have either kidnapped or did something to Khan's crew that caused him to surrender. That's his weakness. It's not power or vengeance; it's the love he has for his people. I had my suspicious that was it, but I wasn't sure."

"Your father?" Spock Prime questioned, mimicking the same move as the other seated before her. "Are you saying you are not from this time?"

Charlie swallowed visibly and stepped closer to Spock's chair as she faced the elder Vulcan. She glanced at the younger Spock, wondering if she was permitted to answer the ambassador. He dipped his head and she glanced back at the screen. "I am, Sir. I was born in the 20th century, but I was brought here a little over a year ago."

The elder Spock sat forward and asked, "What is your name, child?"

"Charlotte Noland."

"Noland? Fascinating. And you now serve onboard the _Enterprise_?"

"Only as an acting ensign, Ambassador," she answered. "I don't know if you heard, but Starfleet headquarters was attacked. A man who was very close to me died there. Jim— I mean Captain Kirk gave me permission to serve on this mission for my own . . . closure."

A spark of humor flashed as Charlie stumbled over the proper way to address Jim, and Charlie knew that Spock Prime was aware of the nature of their relationship. "I see," he said, a smile tugging at his lips before he sobered. "Be careful that you do not follow the path of revenge, child," he warned. "Powerful emotion can be a valuable tool, but it can also be a terrible weapon. Do not lose sight of the true nature of your reason for being here; the needs of the many—"

"Outweigh the needs of the few," she finished, noting the shock in the elder Spock.

"Or the one," he responded.

"Or the one. I will remember that, Sir. Thank you for the advice." She stepped back, allowing the younger Spock to finish the conversation although she noticed the way his eyes followed her, and she knew that he would not let her be in the near future. Good thing she was a stubborn as an ox, because she had a feeling she was in for a hell of an interrogation by the Vulcan.

"Thank you, Mr. Spock, for your words of wisdom," the commander acknowledged.

"Be careful, Commander," Spock Prime advised. "Great sacrifices were made with Khan, sacrifices that could have been avoided. Do not make the same mistakes."

Spock nodded and the transmission ended, the screen once again overlooking a sea of darkness.

Rising from his chair, Spock gestured for Charlie who stepped closer to the Vulcan, surprised she was singled out. "I understand you do not wish to explain what you know about Khan and how you know it," he began, raising a hand as she opened her mouth to object. "But I believe it is prudent you explain what you know to better aid the captain and Mr. Scott on Admiral Marcus's ship. Are they walking into a trap?"

Charlie sighed, reaching up to rub her forehead and she brushed her bangs off her face. "That . . . I don't know. They very well could be and truthfully it wouldn't surprise me if they do."

Spock nodded as if he too considered the same thing. Then his head tilted as he considered the next dilemma. "How do you know so much about Spock Prime? Most know nothing of his existence, yet you called him Ambassador. And you are aware one of our mantras; something I have only shared with the command crew."

Charlie sucked the air in between her teeth, her lip following. "I _can't_ tell you that, Commander."

"I order you to."

Charlie glared, her spine straightening by the low-balled tactic the Vulcan just used. She didn't think he would stoop to such a feat to pull the truth from her, and she'd be damned if she let him get away with it. "I'm sorry, Commander, but no. I cannot give away my source, no matter what you order of me." Spock almost appeared shocked by her blatant disregard of his order.

"Ensign Noland, are you ignoring a direct command from me?"

She lifted her chin, knowing what Spock was implying but also understanding that she had no choice. "Yes, and I understand if you must arrest me for insubordination. I will gladly take whatever punishment is due."

Spock just stared at Charlie, no hint of what transpired behind his dark eyes shone through. "No court martial will be necessary. What I asked of you was a breach of my command. However, if this crisis escalates or we come in contact with more like Khan, I may have no choice. You _will_ tell me everything or I will have you off this ship, and be warned, I've done it before."

"I understand, Commander," Charlie said. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that."

"Indeed. If you would follow me." Spock gestured for McCoy as he hurried over to Uhura. "Lieutenant, I need you to assemble all senior medical and engineering staff in the weapons bay."

There was clearly a question behind her eyes, but Uhura nodded, "Alright."

As she headed off to complete her task, Spock spun towards Charlie and Bones. "Ensign Noland, we may need your assistance on this. Dr. McCoy, you inadvertently activated a torpedo, could you replicate the process?"

McCoy scoffed at the idea. "Why the hell would I want to do that?"

"Can you or can you not?" he persisted.

"Dammit, man. I'm a doctor, not a torpedo technician," McCoy growled.

"The fact that you're a doctor is precisely why I need you to listen very carefully."

* * *

><p>"This is insane. That pointy-eared bastard has lost his mind," Doctor McCoy grumbled for the sixth time as he, Charlie, and about fifty other crewmembers from engineering, medical, and the armory worked to dismantle seventy-two torpedoes in the weapons bay, shuttling the now freely emerged cryotubes to sickbay while others reassembled the missiles.<p>

"I think his plan is actually quiet genius," Charlie remarked, using the pneumatic screwdriver an engineer handed her to remove all the hardware on the torpedo she was working on. "It's a new twist on the whole Trojan horse thing."

The Doctor scoffed as his tricorder continually beeped in his hands, ensuring that the frozen men and women slumbering away stayed that way. "I don't think Khan is stupid enough to fall for it."

"You'd be surprised how arrogance for one's own intelligence makes them ignorant of the obvious."

"Talking from experience?" McCoy quipped.

Charlie just rolled her eyes and began pulling apart the pieces of the missile, setting them next to her in a pile. "You could say that."

Her mind kept going over her and Jim's conversation over the last twenty-four hours, each interaction growing Charlie's frustration. She had thought that being back aboard the _Enterprise,_ this time as one of the one of the crewmembers, would heal the hallowed feeling that had been inside her since she entered the interrogation room with Marcus all those weeks ago. Instead, it had just caused that feeling to grow, until it nearly consumed her. To make matters worse, the discontentment decided to rage now that there was a pause in all the dramatics, and Charlie had time to think about the last few hours instead of concerned she was going to be alive in the next few minutes.

She and McCoy worked in silence, Charlie grunting now and then when a piece of the missile became was stuck. At one point, her frustration rearing its ugly head, she slammed her hand down on the weapon trying to dislodge a rather stubborn section.

"You okay there, Spitfire?" McCoy questioned.

A puff of breath exhaled in a rush, the sweaty hair of her bangs flying up and out of her eyes. She thought about blowing him off and telling him she was fine like she always did. That she was just wrestling with an obstinate hunk of metal and plastering a fake smile on her face as she made a joke. But Charlie was coming to the realization that that was not the case, and lying to doctor might actually do more harm than the extra few minutes of peace would do good.

"I have no idea, Doc," she admitted, turning her head away as she worked on the opposite end of the warhead. "My mind is in a million places right now."

"What's going on?" McCoy paused in his readings, his attention focused solely on her.

Not knowing how else to bridge the awkward silence that began to grow, she said, "Jim is taking Pike's death hard, we both are. I can't tell what he's thinking anymore."

"I can never tell what that kid's thinkin'," McCoy guffawed, turning back to his tricorder.

She pointed a glare at the doctor. "I'm just kind of lost, McCoy. I thought I had it figured out. I had a plan, a path that was going to bring me back here, and now everything has been shot to shit."

"We all go through this, Charlie," McCoy tried, glancing up from his readings. "None of us every really know what we're supposed to be doing."

"Jim does."

"He _thinks_ he does, but that kid uses his ridiculous good luck and quick thinking to pull him out of these situations. There hasn't been much he's done he's thought through beforehand."

Charlie sighed, ripping off a piece and throwing it aside. "Sometimes I feel like he's playing the same game with our relationship; that he doesn't really have a plan."

"Do you?"

She reflected on that though a moment. "Yeah, sort of," she muttered, whipping a gloved hand across her sweaty brow as she leaned against the torpedo. "I want Starfleet. I want this life, but how can I have this and Jim too? If this is how it's going to be, I don't know how we will survive."

"That's a bit pessimistic."

Charlie's brows rose, and she turned her skeptical attention to the working doctor. "Pessimistic? This coming from the man whose second language is grumbling and who hates anything happy."

"I don't hate anything happy," McCoy disputed. "Just the annoying things. Bourbon makes me happy. You don't see me hating it."

"Whether it's pessimistic or not," Charlie continued, ignoring McCoy and getting back to work. She still had another five torpedoes to do to finish in time. "It's the truth. Jim and I aren't working together the way we did. I don't know if it's the stress of this mission, or what happened with Pike, but it's different, Len. He's not . . . he's not as open as before."

"He's focused," McCoy reasoned, moving to the next cryotube. "Listen, and I mean this in all seriousness, give him a break. He's dealing with a lot on his plate. Sometimes you're the driver, and sometimes you're along for the ride. Just enjoy the ride, Charlie."

The piece of metal she was tugging on finally gave way, and like an epiphany, Charlie realized that similar to the portion of the missile pulled from the cryotube, so too did she pull apart why she felt lost. She expected Jim to redeem himself for leaving her behind. He was her savior, her rock. He was supposed to have protected her, whether her pride admitted to it or not, and the fact that he didn't caused a seed of resentment to grow.

Her fingers clenched around the metal, the sharp edges digging into the skin through the glove. With a practiced breath, Charlie relaxed her hand as she attempted to placate her mind. Jim abandoned her because he had no choice. He couldn't give up everything he had worked so hard for just to protect her. It wasn't his fault that she had Marcus to deal with, it wasn't his fault that Pike died, and it certainly wasn't his fault that she was left adrift without any clear direction.

She had to forgive him, not just for his sake, but hers. Their life was never going to be easy, and she had to accept that there were times Jim was going to have to make tough decisions. If she couldn't support him in those moments, then she didn't deserve him any other time.

"You're right, McCoy," she admitted, setting aside the metal as she began work on the next torpedo. "I blame him for abandoning me. I need to work on that."

McCoy stopped again, this time he came right over and stood on the opposite side of the torpedo. With a jerk, her grabbed the screwdriver out of her hand, gaining her attention.

"Hey!" she exclaimed, reaching across to try to grab the tool. "Give that back!"

"He never abandoned you, Spitfire," McCoy reasoned, holding it away from her. "He did everything he could to bypass those orders, but with a direct, specific command he couldn't say no. Even for you."

"The rational part of me understands that, McCoy," Charlie huffed, her arms dropping onto the metal. "Trust me, if you grew up the way I did, you'd understand the significance of a direct order, but it doesn't stop me from thinking that why, when he's so good about getting his way, did he not try harder for me? Why did he let a 'no-win scenario' happen? Why did he let me go?" Unintentionally tears rose in her eyes, and she growled as she brushed them away. She was angry at herself for that weakness, of the idea that she _needed_ someone to save her because she couldn't do it herself.

"I get that, Charlie," McCoy agreed after he weighed the thought. "I'd like to think that our friendship is important enough he'd take the necessary steps like he did with Spock, but what keeps me in check is remembering he's a captain. His decisions affect you, me, this crew and potentially the entire Federation. It's not just about us, and that is what he has to remember."

Charlie heaved a sigh, snatching the offered screwdriver back out of McCoy's hands as she moved onto the next torpedo while McCoy followed. "I know he's the captain, and I know he has all these lives to think of. I guess after having his attention on me when . . . when Sagan happened, I got a little—"

"Spoiled?" McCoy tried.

"Yeah," she nodded. "I told you. I have some things to work on. I love Jim, I really do and I will do everything I can to make him happy. I just need to work on me too, and what I mean for him and this ship."

McCoy stopped, his hand hovering above the next frozen member of Khan's crew and gave Charlie a rare smile. "I knew you'd figure it out," he said. "I'm just glad you aren't as thick as the other half of you."

Charlie rolled her eyes, but grinned nonetheless. Nudging her shoulder into McCoy's side, she drawled, "Yes, alright, you're a genius oh relationship guru, now can we get back to work? I'd rather not set this weapon of mass destruction off before its scheduled appointment."

McCoy chuckled as they worked quickly to finish Spock's clever plan. Charlie only hoped that they wouldn't have to use it.

* * *

><p><strong>leave a contribution the little box<strong>


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Show Us the Way

**Chapter Sixteen: Show Us the Way**

With her tongue sticking out as she concentrated, Charlie lined up the tool in her hand and with a push of the button twisted the last screw into place.

"There, last one," she sighed as she stood, arching her back as she stretched and raised her hand to wipe the sweat off her brow.

"Finished, Spitfire?" McCoy called from where he stood down the line of reminted photon torpedoes.

"Yep, all done!" she answered. Her arms muscles were achy and shaking and a small headache was beginning to grow, but Charlie had never felt so satisfied. Something about working with her hands had helped her relax, and it distracted her long enough to clear her mind and set herself back on the track she wanted to be on. Let Khan try to manipulate them; they were ready for whatever the augment had planned. She was only jealous she hadn't thought of it herself.

Nodding toward a doctor wheeling one of the last cryotubes to sickbay, McCoy made his way to her, surveying the little bit of work left. "Seventy-two photon torpedoes reassembled in ten minutes. Got to be a record," he said as he moved closer, shaking his head. "I'm going to finish up everything here. Head back up to the bridge and tell Odysseus that his Trojan Horse is ready. Signal me when you want these monstrosities activated."

Charlie smirked at the nickname. "Alright, Patroclus," she teased as she saluted and her grin widened as McCoy sneered at the nickname. "I'll go inform our fearless leader that our weapons of mass destruction are raring to go."

McCoy rolled his eyes as Charlie headed back to the bridge. As she walked, she considered what the doctor had said before. She had put too much pressure on Jim, and her own abilities to fix everything. Their lives had been intense for the last few months, filled with intrigue, misgiving and loss, which pulled hard on both of them. She needed to trust him again and give Jim the opportunity to do what he does best.

Jim was smart, a hell of a lot smarter than her, and he had years of experience with the way the world now worked. She was outside her element in every way, completely ill-equipped for the challenges that awaited her, and it wasn't Jim's fault she was unprepared. She prayed that they would someday be able to return to a sense of carefreeness, that this battle would end quickly and peacefully and she could go back to her life: a life onboard the _Enterprise_ with Jim and the rest of the crew. She could almost taste the end.

The doors to the bridge opened with a silent hiss as Charlie stepped through. Surveying the relative calm, she noticed the commander speaking to Sulu in hushed tones.

"The cryotubes have been removed, Sir," she called, gaining his attention as she leap down the stairs and began walking towards him. "Everything is set and ready to go." She paused, noticing the tense stance of the Vulcan, and the way his brows drew together. "What's wrong?"

"We can't locate the captain," Spock said.

"What do you mean—?"

Charlie's question was interrupted when the view screen came online and very distinctive groan was heard. Next Jim's bloody face was thrust onscreen, his arm wrenched behind his back and a phaser shoved into the back of his head. The one holding the weapon was none other than Khan, the augment's glare calm and firm.

"I'm going to make this very simple for you," he ordered, shoving the barrel of the phaser further into Jim's skull.

"Captain!"

"Jim!"

Charlie couldn't believe what her eyes were seeing. She froze next to the command chair, her mouth agape in surprise. Jim's face was already turning purple from fresh bruises, and there were new cuts that dripped dark blood.

"Your crew for my crew," Khan commanded.

"You betrayed us," Spock declared.

"Oh, you are smart, Mr. Spock."

"You son of a bitch!" Charlie spat her vision rimmed with red. Her fists clenched at her side as she imagined connecting with Khan's face. She flashed back to the dark, humid corridors of a Klingon vessel and the moment a spear was thrust into her hands, remembering the way she could compartmentalize her feelings of terror and rage. She had had enough. It was now her time to be strong, to be the savior, and she was not going to let that man do anything to Jim. Not when they were so close to freedom.

"Charlie," Jim groaned. "Don't . . ."

Khan reared up and smashed the phaser into the back of Jim's head, the captain collapsing to floor with a loud groan of pain. Khan, meanwhile, appeared as if he was discussing the weather when his sharp eyes locked onto Charlie who had her hand raised as if she could stop the assault.

"Ah, yes, Charlotte," he droned, straightening his spine. "I'm glad you could join us. Saved Mr. Spock the task of calling for you. I want you to see this."

"See what?" she hissed, dropping her arm. "A deranged, sociopath with a superiority complex holding my captain and my ship at ransom? No thank you."

"Not ransom. This is merely a trade."

Charlie snorted. "This isn't a trade; it's a goddamned hostage situation."

Khan smirked. "Call it what you like, but you have something I want, and I have something of yours." He gestured to his feet and then indicated behind him where the blonde head of Carol Marcus could be seen. "Your father and I made a similar deal once."

"Listen here you good-for-nothing piece of shit," Charlie barked, her anger causing her to be reckless as she pointed her finger at the augment like a mother to a disobedient child. "I don't care about whatever deal you had with my father. We will not negotiate with terrorists. Ever."

Khan laughed, the humor in his eyes was dark and menacing. "Now where have I heard that before? Oh that's right, your father used that against me before I ordered seven hundred of his troops executed."

"My father has nothing to do with this. The minute you attacked Jim, you forfeited the deal we made in sickbay."

"And what deal was that?" Khan barked. "I would aid your captain in exchange for what? The protection of my crew? Your _captain_ couldn't even protect himself. _I _had to get him here, _I_ navigated them through this maze and what did he give me? A pathetic attempt at a stun and proving he is just as I explained to you, Charlotte. The next Marcus."

"You're wrong," Charlie argued. "Jim is nothing like him. He asked you to help and you volunteered. He probably stunned your ass for the same reason I would. You're a murder, an egotistical maniac who only cares for seventy-two _frozen_ men and women rather than the other billions of lives down on that planet. So don't you dare put the blame on him."

Khan smirked again. "Well you do put things eloquently. I had an easier time with the general."

"And look where that got you," she growled. "An ice box and a one way ticket to exile."

Khan shook his head as Spock and Sulu glanced towards each other. "Careful. That temper of yours will get you into trouble someday. Let's not have you as the one to run negotiations, Charlotte; too much of your father in you."

Her eyes narrowed as Spock came to stand by her side, his hand reaching up to pull her back and warn her to calm down. With a sharp glance toward the Vulcan, she spat at Khan, "I am nothing like him."

"You're more like him than you realize. Now Mr. Spock, give me my crew."

"And what will you do when you get them?" he asked, turning to address the man on the screen.

"Continue the work we were doing before we were banished."

"Which as I understand it involves the mass genocide of any being you find to be less than superior. Am I right, Ensign?" Spock questioned, turning to Charlie.

"Spot on there, Commander," she sneered, glaring at Khan. "I told Jim not to trust you."

"Yes, you're so smart, aren't you Charlotte?" Khan snarled. "Relying on that pathetic family oath to keep your withering existence meaningful. You think you're the clever one, the pride of the family because you can spot the obvious. Your father was soldier, _he_ was the hero you erroneously believe yourself to be, and the blatant daddy issues you exhibit are as boring as they are cliché. With one word, one phrase I can destroy you, Charlotte. You think so highly of yourself, of your care for others, yet look who is here, lying at my feet. You are a pathetic excuse for human, especially one so inferior. And what about you, Mr. Spock?" Khan turned his attention to the First Officer as Charlie forcefully tried to keep a reign on her temper. The only restraint that kept her from lashing out was the man groaning off-screen. "Shall I destroy you, too? Or will you give me what I want?"

Spock paused, weighing his options and like Charlie, finding them very limited. "We have no transporter capabilities."

"Fortunately mine are perfectly functional. Drop your shields."

"Don't trust him, Sir," Charlie reasoned quietly. "He's already betrayed us once."

"If I do so, I have no guarantee that you will not destroy the _Enterprise_," he challenged.

"Well, let's play this out logically then, Mr. Spock," Khan sneered, impatient. "Firstly, I will kill your Captain to demonstrate my resolve. Then if yours holds, I will have no choice but to kill you and your entire crew."

"If you destroy our ship, you'll also destroy your own people," Charlie barked.

"Your crew requires oxygen to survive, mine does not," Khan snapped back. "I will target your life support systems located behind the aft nacelle. And after every single person aboard your ship suffocates, I will walk over your cold corpses to recover my people." He paused, his resolve like granite and Charlie knew that it was time to act. "Now, shall we begin?"

Charlie turned to Spock and nodded. They had no choice, but they were prepared. It was exactly as Spock Prime predicted.

"Lower shields," Spock ordered. With a few deft strokes of his fingers, Sulu pulled down the last trace of the _Enterprise's_ defense systems just as Charlie sent a written communication to McCoy with one word. _Now._

"A wise choice, Mr. Spock," Khan said. Rearing back, he kicked Jim as hard as he could, the captain emitting a loud bark of pain before turning to head to one of _Vengeance's_ command stations.

"Stop!" Charlie shouted, wishing she could put herself between Khan and Jim as her captain began coughing violently. "Don't hurt him!"

"I see all seventy-two torpedoes are still in their tubes," Khan added ignoring her as he scanned the ship. "If they're not mine, Commander, I will know it."

Spock couldn't cover the insult as he grounded out, "Vulcans do not lie. The torpedoes are yours."

Sulu glanced over his shoulder and nodded once. Khan had started the transporter sequence for the torpedoes.

"Thank you, Mr. Spock." Khan sound genuinely grateful to the commander for surrendering his crew. It was sincere enough that Charlie almost regretted what was coming. Almost.

"I have fulfilled your terms," Spock commanded once the transfer was complete. "Now fulfill mine."

"Give us Jim back!" Charlie ordered, as firmly as she dared.

"Well, Kirk," Khan purred as he took a seat in the command chair, sending a smirk towards her and Spock. Charlie vaguely wondered where Marcus was, but given what Khan did to Jim who was allied with him, she didn't think Marcus ended up surviving the confrontation with Khan. "It seems apt to return you to your crew, and that little hellion of yours. After all, no ship should go down without her captain."

The implication sent Charlie running towards the view screen as the white lights of the transporter lit up the sharp cheekbones of the mass murder. "You bastard!" she hollered. "I knew my father should have killed you when he had the chance. It was a mistake to let you live, a mistake I will be hard pressed to forget."

"Unfortunately you will not have the opportunity, Charlotte," Khan remarked offhandedly. "Give my regards to your dear daddy when you see him." The proximity alert began to sound, its high pitch whine as annoying as it was distressing.

"He has locking phasers on us, sir," Sulu panicked, throwing the shields up as the first projectiles were launched at them.

The bridge shook by the force of the explosions, the amount of damage the _Enterprise _suffered was intense and terrifying. A combination of torpedoes and phaser blasts were focused on the starboard side of the ship, the engineering and weapons bays the main targets as more of the _Enterprise_ and her crew were launched into orbit around the moon.

"Where are the shields?!" Charlie blasted.

"Shields at six percent!" Sulu shouted above the din. A highlight of the shield strength on the main view screen was ominous as red bars of damage increased, the red alerts continuing to blare their warning as the lights flashed.

"Wonderful," Charlie sighed.

"The torpedoes, how much time, Ensign?" Spock asked.

Charlie glanced down at the watch on her wrist, barely able to keep standing as the ship took another huge volley of fire. "Twelve seconds, sir!"

Initiating the ship wide alert, Spock ordered, "Crew of the _Enterprise_, prepare for imminent proximity detonation."

Within seconds, a ginormous blast of orange fire burst from the hull of the _Vengeance_, tearing an enormous hole along the side of the ship. The fire radiated upwards, knocking out its warp and stabilizing functions. The orange fire appeared to reach all the way to the bridge, the strength of the photon torpedoes unmatched by any the _Enterprise_ could have fired.

"Sir, the weapons have been knocked out," Sulu said once the shockwave passed and they began getting readings from the other ship. "Not bad, Commander."

"Thank you, Lieutenant," he acknowledged as the ship stilled. Charlie heaved a great sigh as she turned away, taking a few slow steps onto the upper bridge as she ran a shaking hand under her bangs. They had done it. Jim, Scotty and Carol were safe aboard the ship somewhere below her feet, while Khan and Marcus would no longer plague them.

"Ensign," Spock called, spinning his chair towards her.

"Yes, Commander?" she voiced, her hand on the railing to steady herself as her adrenaline faded and the nerves from the last twenty-four hours kicked in.

"Good work."

Charlie smiled, the gratitude directed at Spock more than she had ever felt towards the Vulcan. Her eyes wrinkled and her shoulders sagged in relief.

"Thank you, Sir. I—"

Charlie was cut off as the lights died, the bridge falling into complete darkness with only the lights of the stars illuminating the crew. The ship began to tilt to the side, Charlie stumbling as she gripped the bannister harder, trying to keep herself upright.

"Sir, the central power grid is failing!" a crewmember said, the urgency of the problem not lost on Charlie.

"Switch to auxiliary power," Spock ordered. Charlie pulled her way across to an empty station, throwing in her access code and pulling up the energy specs of the ship.

"The auxiliary power is failing too!" she shouted. As the ship titled more, the bridge spun around, the blue, green, and white kaleidoscope of Earth filling the screen.

"Commander, our ship is caught in to Earth's gravity," Sulu said.

"Can we stop?"

The helmsman paused. "I can't do anything."

"Oh hell no," Charlie growled, spinning back towards her station. "We are not going to die today." Snapping on as many systems as she could, she began manipulating the energy pathways, trying to find a way around the damaged coils that seemed to roadblock their main systems. She tried to change the starboard energy conduits near the dilithium chamber to bypass through the bridge, giving the computers enough power to then correct the other neural networks of the starship, but the amount of energy from the warp chamber was almost nonexistent. At the same time, the ship shook from another explosion, only this one was inward by disrupted coolant systems causing arrays to overheat.

"Dammit," she growled seeing nothing but a tangled mess of wires and energy fields that went nowhere. She tried another idea of hacking into the central power grid from the bridge to direct solid bursts of energy to each other main systems in a cycle, but there wasn't enough stored to do much more than keep life support working. "I can't change the energy pathways, Spock!" Charlie updated trying to keep calm from the dismal readings in front of her. "There are too many disconnections. There's no clear path."

"Sound evacuation to all decks."

"What?" Charlie gasped, snapping her head to the Vulcan.

"Do it!" Spock snapped, the lieutenant at the station behind him sounding the alarm as Spock turned to the crew. "As acting Captain I order you to abandon this ship." With a press of a button, a five-point safety harness secured itself around his frame, bolting him to the command chair. "I will remain behind and divert all power to life support and evacuation shuttle bays." No one said a word, or made any movement to indicate they were going to follow his orders. "I order you to abandon this ship!"

"All due respect, Commander, but we're not going anywhere," Sulu said before activating his own harness, the others seated following suit.

"Cor Unum, Via Una," Charlie proclaimed, catching the commander's eye. "We're in this together or not at all. We're family, Spock. All of us."

She hit the same switch and felt the thick, black binding draw across her shoulders and pull her against the chair. Spock dipped his head in her direction, acknowledging that she and the crew around her would stay with their commander. The loyalty on the _Enterprise_ was something Charlie knew she would remember until the day she died.

The ship began spinning, the sensation similar to the loop of a roller-coaster and Charlie had to force down the bile that rose in her throat as the ship completed its turn.

Once they were centered, Charlie turned back to her monitor, the readings forcing her nausea to rise again. "Auxiliary systems are at five percent, Commander," she said, her wide eyes turning to Spock. "It's not going to last much longer."

"Can you override the main systems and divert the power?" Sulu called to Charlie.

"I'll try." As she pulled up the specs again, the ship listed to the side and Charlie gripped her station to stop from falling, feeling as if she were about to do a somersault from her chair. The only thing keeping her steady was the harness strapped across her chest and her fingers clenched on the monitor.

"Gravity systems are failing!" Spock announced when the listing wasn't corrected.  
>"Hold on. Hold on!"<p>

"I am holding on," Charlie growled, her arm muscles straining to keep her upright even with the harness. Piece of the bridge that had broken off during the battle with Marcus's ship began flying around, one particularly sharp edge catching Charlie's cheek as it sailed past. She hissed from the contact, reaching up to feel the puffy ridge of irritated skin and the sticky blood that came with it.

"Awesome," she muttered, glaring at the red smear on her fingertips. Once the ship settled upright again, Charlie checked what was left of the remaining power grid, and it was bleak. They were falling towards Earth and there wasn't enough auxiliary power to save them.

As the force from the downward pull of Earth's gravity drew them closer to the atmosphere, giant cracks and cervices slithered through the bridge. It was as if the gravity of Earth tried to tear apart the _Enterprise_ before she had even begun her decent to the surface. Charlie glanced up as one giant crack formed above her, wincing as the force shattered the glass monitor above her head.

"Emergency power at fifteen percent and dropping!" Darwin shouted from her station as hull integrity followed suit.

"Ensign, is there any point where the energy level is remain steady?" Spock shouted.

Shaking her head to remove as much of the particles as possible, Charlie check her marginally functional computer. "No, Sir," she complained. "It's as if our generators aren't running!"

"We don't have generators!" Sulu snapped.

"Whatever, you know what I mean!" Charlie countered. "The energy conduits don't have the free flowing energy like before. No station is receiving full power."

The ship began to flip again, the G-forces increasing with each spin. Gritting her teeth, Charlie remembered when her brother had to go through with human centrifuge training and the types of affects gravitation force could have on the human body. While she wasn't quiet to the tunnel effect, she as beginning to see black spots pop up in her vision. Trying to keep her panic at bay, Charlie began coughing, trying to force the blood back into her brain why the centrifugal force of the falling starship pulled it away. She noticed others began following her lead, most notably Sulu who after several huffs was able to focus back on his station.

"How long until re-entry?" Spock asked once they were upright.

"Five minutes," Darwin answered.

An alert popped up on Charlie's screen and her eye's widened from what she was seeing. "Commander! The shuttles are falling out of their ports! The crew can't evacuate."

"Mr. Sulu, divert every remaining power to stabilizers."

"I'm doing what I can, Sir. Doing what I can!"

"Sulu, I've redirected the energy conduit from the bioengineering labs," Charlie called, her fingers clumsily flying across her console. "It's only point six percent but—"

"If you can pull from A&A, Stellar Cartography, and the Hydroponics Bays—"

"We might have enough!" they finished together.

"Quick, Charlie!" Sulu ordered. "If don't get power and shields back online, we're gonna be incinerated on re-entry."

"I'm working as quickly as I can!" Her fingers flew as she directed the tiny amounts of power to the stabilizers, attempted to form a stable base for the evacuation shuttles. She felt as a trickle of sweat slid down her back in a cold rivulet, her gaze focused on the console as she brushed a hand over her damp skin.

"We're entering the atmosphere!" Sulu shouted.

"Brace for re-entry!" Spock ordered.

The ship continued to fall, and Charlie felt her heart rise with the movement of the ship. She closed her eyes once her job was done, having run out of ideas and avenues to aid Sulu in restarting the stabilizers. She had a feeling that unless a miracle occurred, they were going to crash into the Earth's surface if they didn't burn up in the atmosphere first. The ship began to shake like a rattle in a baby's hand, the momentum knocking her teeth together even as she clenched them with all her strength. Her hands ached from the force of her fingers gripping the console, and she began to hyperventilate from the sheer panic of falling without a parachute.

They were going to die; they were going to die and she never got to tell Jim she was sorry. She would never again tell him she loved him, of where she really came from, and how she knew so much. This time her life did flash before her eyes. She saw her brother and sister in those few carefree moments when they were allowed to be children. She watched through her first love and the heartache of that loss, the thrill and tiny stab of fear when she was accepted to Bristol, the way she had overdressed in her first meeting with Kate and Philippa. Everything, the little events and the big ones, her achievements and her failures, all rolled before her eyes like a movie reel as the _Enterprise_ made her way to her inevitable demise.

The last thing Charlie could think of was the regret at never becoming the person she wanted to be. Never becoming the mother of children who felt the love of a parent, not the disappointment of an officer. Never joining the ranks of Starfleet and being given her first assignment. Never finding that new world, that new species, that new universe where no one had gone before. Her life was ending before it had begun and she mourned for the person she would never be.

As the ship shook harder, Charlie flinched and clenched every muscle in her body on instinct, waiting as they fell through the clouds for that moment when solid ground met starship. Instead of contact, the lights on bridge sprung back to life, washing the command center in that same familiar blue.

"Warp core is back online!" Sulu shouted, Charlie snapping her eyes open and seeing the reading of full power restored to all the main departments.

"Maximum thrusters, Mr. Sulu," Spock ordered just as they fell through stratus clouds in the lower atmosphere.

"Thrusters at maximum! Standby! Standby!"

Like the moment and elevator stops its decent, the _Enterprise_ slowed to a stop as the main thrusters surged on, bursting through the clouds as it rose further into the air. The light from the sun shone into the now calm bridge, the rays bouncing off the glass and creating bright flares of sparkling warmth. The cheers on the bridge were loudest Charlie had ever heard, and she couldn't stop that same shout of joy when she realized they were safe.

"Shields restored," a lieutenant called, his sharp face split in a wide grin.

"Power's back online, Commander," Charlie added, her smile infectious as the shook hands with those around her, everyone embracing the exhilaration at being alive.

With a few key strokes, Sulu relaxed against the back of his chair. "Mr. Spock, altitude stabilizing."

"It's a miracle," Darwin praised.

Spock paused and released his harness, his head tilting in that confused way when something illogical occurred. "There are no such things," he said, his eyes narrowed in confusion.

Just then, a hailing frequency chimed in, Spock imitating the feed from his command chair.

"_Engineering to Bridge, Mr. Spock._"

"Mr. Scott." The question in Spock's tone caught Charlie's attention, her focus now on the call from their chief engineer.

"_Sir, you and the lass better get down here. Better hurry_."

Charlie's heart dropped.

* * *

><p><strong>I'm curious. I'm not getting as many reviews as I did by this point in Cor Unum. Is there something I'm doing wrong you all don't like? I'm trying to make the story as realistic as possible as if Charlie were there. I honestly don't bite, I won't withhold chapters because of bad reviews and I want to get better with my writing so if there's a problem (or not who knows?) I would gladly like to know. <strong>

**K solicitation of reviews is now over**


	17. Chapter Seventeen: In Her Heart

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, added to alert list or just read anonymously. I can't tell you enough how much your praise, questions, and just taking the time to read my piece has meant to me. Honestly, it makes my week when I can post on Saturday and watch as you all enjoy my story :) You're all wonderful.**

This chapter is probably the hardest one I've ever had to write, including my other story Price of Freedom. I cried, literally as I wrote this. It was so difficult to try to get into the scene and keep myself detached. I almost couldn't do it. I hope that I conveyed the emotion I felt through this chapter. And if I did, then word of warning: keep the tissues nearby.

**Only three more chapters to go!**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Seventeen: In Her Heart<strong>

"_Better hurry."_

It amazed her how two words; two inconspicuous, innocuous words could cause such a bodily response. Those two words bounced around her muddled brain, the dejectedness of Scotty's tone sharp and terrifying. Words that imparted urgency, but should not have produced that geyser of fear like Old Faithful firing in her soul. She knew what he meant, what was waiting for them in engineering. After all, Spock was seated in the command chair. Who else could have saved the ship?

Scotty said to hurry but everything plodded along in slow motion. The wide, panic-induced eyes catching Spock's, the turn to the doors, the push off the chair, the intake of air so sharp it stung her lungs. Her heart pummeled the inside of her chest as she tried to swallow the sand in her mouth, wanting to run as fast as possible and instead trudging through mud. Her feet wouldn't move no matter how hard she tried to lift them, sprinting a mile in water was easier than the short walk off the bridge.

"_Better hurry."_

They were safe. Marcus was defeated. Khan destroyed. Pike avenged. It was the end of the story, the happy ending after the victorious battle, the rainbow following the tornado. They had done what was required. They saved the _Enterprise_, Earth, the Federation. So why did none of that matter? Why did fear enslave them when joy should have been the product of their victory?

_ "Better hurry."_

Time sped up to normal, urgency replacing insipidness. They ran. Spock and Charlie side by side ran as fast as their legs could carry them. The Vulcan pulled away, his strength and size greater than hers, and she puffed out an irate breath as she tried to catch up, willing her legs to pump faster, to pick up her knees and throw her feet further ahead. They spun around corners like two cars on a track, almost colliding with crews working to repair the damaged ship. Neither acknowledging the presence of the other, their focus on one destination, knowing they had to get to there before it was too late.

_"Better hurry."_

Spock hit the lift first, shoving his finger onto the button so hard and so fast she was surprised it didn't break. Even from the distance behind, Charlie saw his hand move back and forth as he impatiently signaled the machine to bring them below. She was only feet away when the door opened and Spock slipped in, turning as he began thumbing for the engineering deck. For one panicked second Charlie thought the doors would close on her and she'd have to wait, but at the last moment Spock jutted his hand out and prevented the doors from closing.

Her knees shook when she finally stumbled into the lift, her hand reaching out to brace against the walls as she blinked against the dazzling lights. She couldn't breathe. Why couldn't she breathe? Why was everything so hot and so bright? Charlie shook her head, the world around her a mass of chaos as she leaned over to catch her breath. Her vision spun, her throat was sandpaper, her legs unwilling to hold her up. Her fingers curled against the metal, finding the subtle vibrations as the car took them deeper into the bowls of the ship a solidifying movement. It placed her back in the moment, reminding her that her nightmare was real. The car shook harder as it descended, and it was as if the ship trembled with the fear for what waited below. That she knew what occurred in her core and cried with them.

"_Better hurry."_

Spock was tense next to her, far more than Charlie had ever seen him. She looked up and searched his eyes, his impatience for the doors to open mirroring her own. She saw them swirling and fearful, an unfamiliar prospect from the normally reticent Vulcan. She didn't know whether to reach out to comfort the man, or hold on to him for her own sanity. They both had the same unquenchable fear of what awaited them, yet also resigned to that fate.

"_Better hurry."_

The descent of the car was the longest ride she could remember from a turbolift, but it was blessing in disguise. Charlie didn't want the doors to open. She didn't want to face what was on the other side. She just wanted a few more minutes believing they had won, that they had made it, that everything was going back to the way it was. She needed to believe that. Since blinking her eyes open to a two-moon world her life had been an uphill battle, and she was tired from pushing the stone up only to have it roll back down again.

She should have seen it coming. She had felt it in her very being that something wasn't right and should have remembered the sacrifices that were made in the past and future. But the battle between starships, and her overwhelming desire to see the man at the center of her chaos destroyed caused Charlie to forget the core lesson of her principles. She may have said the words of her family, but her heart focused on her own selfish wants instead of the needs of the ship. Now, she might have to pay the price for that weakness. A price that could crush her.

"_Better hurry."_

The doors opened. Engineering appeared normal. The lights were as bright as on the bridge, the echoing red alerts unchanged. There were no outward scenes of damage or bodies lying around. There was no blood, or burning, or cascading fall of coolant. Engineering was safe because of one person.

"_Better hurry."_

Spock sprinted out the minute the doors widened, not wasting one moment for hesitation. Charlie took a breath, preparing herself for whatever they found then followed the wide, hurried steps of the taller male. They ran past the large coolant tanks, the abandoned engineering stations, the tool port. They ran around the warp core, slowing to a walk when they saw Scotty standing in front of them, his head lowered and his shoulders sagging.

Both Spock and Charlie pulled in great gasps of air as they stopped in front of the engineer. The deep concern wrinkled on his face as his lips turned down and the pain behind his eyes aged Scotty by ten years. He looked lost and broken, and although his brow lowered over his eyes when he saw Spock, tears clouded his vision when his attention moved to Charlie. Scotty's lips pursed together as he shook his head, the very movement as detached when he voice summoned them.

Spock immediately glanced towards the center of the core, his gaze the most intense as he scrutinized the apparatus. Scotty kept his head tilted away, as if unwilling to even acknowledging what happened. He blinked away his tears, and reached out to place a comforting hand on Charlie's arm as she slowly turned to Spock who had rushed to the door, the door that was their saving grace and the bane of their joy. It was tucked away, so inconspicuous that unless you were looking for it, one could walk right past. If Spock and Scotty hadn't been there, Charlie very well could have kept running and never found him.

"Open it."

Spock's panicked command was thunderous after their journey of absolute silence. They hadn't said a word, hadn't needed to because both Spock and Charlie were feeling the same thing at the same level of intensity. It was a feeling both had had before; they were familiar with the beating heart, the shaking knees, and the sweaty palms. They both knew how it felt when the cloudy haze of instinct takes over, followed by the shinning clarity of run or fight. But there was no running from what awaited them on the other side of the door, and no fighting the unseen killer that was stripping them of hope.

"The decontamination process is not complete," Scotty explained. Both his fear for the ship and helplessness of the situation made his words sharp and callous. "You'd flood the whole compartment. The door's locked, sir." _There's no hope._

He didn't say it, but Charlie heard it clear as day. She glared at Scotty as she brushed past him, her steps measured as she drew closer to the clear door and the man lying slumped behind it. Her eyes widened, her brain locking up and unwilling to process the scene in front of her eyes. She felt like she was dreaming that her world was spinning around her but if she became too scared, she could wake up. As her heart continued to thud against her ribcage, she knew there was no waking up from this nightmare.

Spock kneeled down, bracing his arms on either side of the airlock as Jim reached to close off the compartment from the main core chamber. The captain was panting as if he just ran three marathons, his chest filling up with giant gasps of toxic air. His face was covered in a sickly sweat, and there was lethargy behind his movements, his eyes closed as his arm collapsed next to him.

Jim's cerulean eyes blinked opened, shock briefly flickered when he saw Spock next to him, but understanding replaced the surprise.

"How's our ship?" Jim gasped as he struggled to keep his eyes open and his brain conscious.

"Out of danger," Spock reassured, his voice filled with a despondency Charlie had never heard. Although she stood in her own grief watching as the man she loved wilted away from radiation poisoning, Spock's emotions were tangible. The stoic alien was a withering mess of nerves that radiated their own toxin, feeding the growing anguish as Charlie watched as Jim lay dying.

"Good." The captain nodded, sinking back

"You save the crew." It was astonishment, not because Spock didn't believe that Jim wouldn't do it, but more of his own approval by the captain's actions.

"You used what he wanted against him," Jim fired back, his pride lending strength as a smile stretched across his face. "That's a nice move."

Spock swallowed. "It is what you would have done."

"And this . . . this is what you would have done. It was only logical." Jim coughed, his voice beginning to sound horse with fear and pain. "Where's Charlie?"

"Here," she choked, tears falling down her cheeks as she collapsed next to Spock, the Vulcan scooting down so that Charlie was next to her boyfriend. She took in his weakened form, the tinge of his skin and his bloodshot eyes. She tried to swallow back her cries, wanting to be strong for him but his debilitated state tore through her. "I'm right here," she reassured.

"You were right," he choked. "About Khan. I shouldn't have trusted him."

"I didn't want to be," she whispered. "I wanted to be wrong."

"I should have listened to you."

"No," she shook her head. "No. We would all be dead if you had listened to me."

He tried to smile, the small movement of his lips moving caused him to flinch in pain. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Her voice caught, and she had to swallow to clear her throat. "None of this is your fault. You saved this ship and your crew. You saved us; you saved me. You're a hero, Jim. My hero, you always will be."

"I'm sorry, I—" he choked again, the words becoming harder as he was overcome with his own emotion. "I never wanted this for – for you. I wanted to do better than my dad. I wanted to be . . . be there for you. Forever. I love you."

The tears fell. She couldn't stop them as they poured down her cheeks. Tilting her head, her hand reached up and laid again the glass near Jim's leaning head, and she could almost imagine stroking his hair to comfort him. "You'll always be with me. Don't you remember? No matter where we go, I will always find you. Our love, it's stronger than anything." He smiled, a thin brightness coming into his sapphire eyes before they dimmed.

"You have to be strong, Charlie," he gasped. "You have to be as strong as . . . as that woman who took on five Klingons, who put me in my place from a hospital bed. You survived Sagan, you'll survive this."

"You helped," she tried as she rubbed a hand under her running nose, sniffling.

"Maybe a little," he shrugged. "You're strong and it's now up to you. Protect . . . them for me. I did this for them, for you. Keep them safe."

Charlie nodded, sniffling as the tears continued, turning away to stop Jim seeing the amount of pain she was in, how her heart was shredding itself in her chest.

"Take care of her," she heard him order, the command a knife in her gut as she glanced at Spock.

"You have my word," the Vulcan answered, his voice hollow as he caught her eye.

"I'm scared, Spock," Jim admitted, their attention turned on the dying man on the other side of the safety glass who was trying not to cry himself. They were so close; they could almost touch him yet were denied that privilege by a quarter inch piece of translucent aluminum. Jim's faded eyes pleaded as he said "Help me not be. How do you choose not to feel?"

Spock paused with tears clouding his eyes and his slanted brows drawn together, his emotion no longer controlled as he muttered, "I do not know. Right now, I am failing."

Jim knew. He flickered his eyes to Charlie who nodded, confirming what she always felt between the captain and his first officer. Of the brotherly love they had for each other. "I want you to know why I couldn't let you die," he turned back to Spock, "why I went back for you."

"Because you are my friend." One drop of pain fell, then another, the image of wetness on the Vulcan's cheeks startling.

Jim tried to answer as his breathing increased, his eyes dimming as he struggled to stay conscious. His hand slammed against the glass, his palm searching as Spock raised his own palm, his fingers spread in a V; the Vulcan salute. He pressed to the glass, Charlie laying her own on top of the Vulcan. They shared a knowing glance, the solidarity between the human woman and the first officer affirmed for the first time as they acknowledged the battle they were about to face together. One neither could stop no matter how much they wanted to.

Jim's fingers shifted into the V himself, his chin trembling as he shifted his eyes to theirs. He coughed as he smiled, peace replacing his fear until his face relaxed, his eyes settling to straight ahead as he no longer stared at the two people in from of him. His hand slipped off as the light left his face, like a burnt out light bulb where only the bright, shadowy spot remained in its place. Jim Kirk, Captain of the _USS Enterprise_ and loved more deeply by a half human-half Vulcan hybrid and a woman outside her own time was dead.

Spock glanced down, his breathing rapid as he tried to control himself. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale; the Vulcan's rate increasing with each second, the anger and pain palatable as oxygen was replaced by carbon dioxide. Until with one loud, drawn out scream Spock released the agony in their hearts.

"Khhhaaaaaan!"

Spock jumped up and ran past Charlie, past Scotty and Uhura, and away from the warp core. Once the reality of what was in front of her hit, Charlie echoed the Vulcan, rising on her knees as she hands splayed out on the panel, slapping against it with all her might as she clawed to get through it.

"No," she gasped. "No, no, God no! Jim! Please, please! No, Jim don't leave. Don't leave me! Please, don't go somewhere I can't follow. I can't go with you where you are!" She paused, staring at the lifeless man on the other side of the glass. "You promised me, goddammit!" Charlie yelled as she slammed her fist against the panel. "You promised you would always be there for me, and I'm sorry, I'm not going to let you off that easily. It's just you and me, remember? You and me to the bitter end. I gave up everything: my world, my time, my universe, all of it for you. I stayed for you, for us because I believed in us. You can't leave me, Jim, you _can't_. You have to stay for me, for this ship. What are we going to do without you? What will I do? Please Jim, please. Don't leave me. I love you. I love you so much. Don't go. Don't go, don't go, don't go!"

She collapsed against the glass, her hand above her head as the wails poured from her very soul. She screamed as she cried, great howls tearing from her throat and slicing her open. She started coughing, the pain from the screams nothing to the great rift in her chest. That pain was unbearable, unimaginable. Her whole body shook by its force and it felt as if her very soul had been shattered. Like a black hole, she was collapsing in on herself.

She didn't notice as Uhura kneeled next to her, pulling her away from the glass and into her chest, holding Charlie as she cried. She didn't notice as McCoy replaced Uhura who chased after Spock. She didn't notice when the doctor pulled her up, dragging her away from the glass once the decontamination sequence was complete and his doctors dressed in white hazard suits could finally get to their captain. All she knew was anguish, a pain so deep her atoms quivered.

"Charlie, Charlie c'mon," McCoy urged. She blinked blearily at him, noticing his presence for the first time.

"He's . . . he's."

"I know," McCoy said, pulling her into his thick chest as the tears erupted again. The blue mesh of his uniform was soft against her cheek, and his pounding heart reminded her that she would never feel the same from Jim. She gasped, shoving the doctor away as her trembling hands reached up to cover her face, her long fingers splayed out. She tried to hold it in, to force the emotion back but it was tsunami against a wooden wall.

McCoy stumbled back, surprised by the voracity of her movement. Running a hand through his hair, McCoy approached Charlie with far more caution, his hand reaching out as he coaxed, "Let's get you to sickbay, Spitfire."

Her hands dropped, her bloodshot, tear-stained hollowed eyes staring at nothing. She knew McCoy was in front of her, knew she shoved him for no reason, but she was losing control of herself. She glanced toward the entrance to the warp core, swallowing as the stretcher with Jim's body was pulled out and placed on a gurney. With a small nod, McCoy wrapped his arm around her shoulders, holding her up as he pulled her along the path she had run twenty minutes before when the universe was still how it was supposed to be.

Before she knew it, McCoy was sitting her down on a bed in sickbay, his concerned eyes not leaving hers as he checked her over, running a flashlight back and forth between her eyes then lightly pressing against her neck for a pulse.

"I'm going to give you a light sedative," he said, pulling out a hypospray.

Faster than anyone could believe, her hand snapped out and she clutched his wrist in a strong grip. "No."

"Charlie, with what happened I don't think –"

"No," she ordered again, her eyes snapping to his from where they rested on the floor. McCoy sucked in his breath, the intensity of her gaze unnerving. "I'm not going to take drugs. Any drugs. I'm not about to be doped up because you don't think I can handle this. Jim told me to be strong, and that's what I'm going to be."

She was tired of crying. She was raw and exhausted, and she knew every second was going to be a struggle to keep her head above water; she didn't need a foreign substance pulling her under. She straightened her spine, Jim's last words clearing a way through her fogged mind, reminding her that her love for him was stronger than her grief. She would do what he asked, protect and serve the _Enterprise_ to the best of her abilities, even if it killed her.

The doors to sickbay opened, the doctors in hazmat suits rolling in the captain with Scotty and other crewmembers following behind. The activity froze as all the crew in sickbay took stock of the body bag and the captain lying in it. McCoy signed, his shoulders falling as he stared at the dark mass knowing what he had to do next and regretting every second of it. Charlie's attention moved between the doctor and the gurney, her lips pursed.

Hopping off the bed, a path was cleared as she walked into the bright light that shined down. It was now or never. She needed to face the truth that laid in front of her. Her hand reached out, running alone the smooth, dark plastic before she grasped the zipper and slid it down the length of teeth. She flipped the cover over, revealing the serene head of the captain. All the lines of worry around his closed eyes and mouth were gone, the sickly pallor replaced by the pale death mask. Choking back the bile in her throat, Charlie reached out and laid her hand on the side of Jim's face, his skin cold under her fingertips. She bit her lip as tears rose again, bending down to lay a gentle kiss on his blue lips. As she stood, McCoy reached up and squeezed her shoulder in support, a silent affirmation that although they were grieving in their own way, they were in it together.

Carol came forward, her blonde bob framing a face that echoed the confusion by those in the room. Charlie knew exactly what was going through their heads. How could Captain Kirk, the man who defined all the odds, who was born for greatness be dead before his thirtieth birthday? The same idea poured through hers. Why?

Charlie turned away, letting the others pay their respects as she wandered to the doctor's desk and the man sitting next to it. The dead tribble was still lying on the top of the table, the remnants of Khan's blood and McCoy's experiment forgotten by the events of the last hour. It seemed insignificant now. A grain of sand on a beach that had just been pounded by a hurricane. Who cared how the augment's blood worked or how it was able to regenerate at the rate it did. Jim was gone and there was no bringing him back. Hope turned to sawdust in her mouth.

But then the tribble cooed.


	18. Chapter Eighteen: The Games

**Chapter Eighteen: The Games**

The tribble cooed again, a soft delightful sound as Charlie and Doctor McCoy spared startled glances, diving in for a closer look at the fluffy specimen that was now _breathing_ when minutes before it had been nothing but a paper weight. It took a second, watching as the fluff ball drew in a breath and then released for Charlie to discern the ramifications of such as small act.

"Do you know what this means?" she breathed, angling her head to catch McCoy's eyes, hope glimmering through both of them. It was impossible, there was no way anything could be released from death's cold hands, but if the tribble could, there was no saying why a human couldn't.

"Yes I do," he growled, rising to his full height. "Get me a cryotube, now!" His nurses and doctors blinked their eyes, confused a moment before they took off in different directions. Some headed for the area sectioned off for Khan's crew while others readied several bio beds.

"What's going?" Carol asked as Charlie ran around the desk, taking a hold of Jim's gurney and moving it aside so that a technician could roll over the cryotube.

"There's a way to save Jim," Charlie answered, watching as a crew of three hefted a cryotube onto a bio bed to wheel over. Everything changed. Her hardened heart was now a kite caught in a seaside breeze. Her cemented feet sprouted wings. Her mind was flashing like lightening, thinking steps ahead of where they were and what needed to be done. It was possible that Jim was not lost to her forever, and she was going to do everything she could to make that dream a reality. There was hope, a small sparkle like a tiny star in the distant sky and she focused on it with her whole being until it was the only light in the universe.

Carol was taken aback, her head tilting to the side as she stumbled, "But that's . . . that's—"

"Impossible, I know," Charlie interrupted coming out of her thoughts, turning to address the woman as they waited for the popsicle. "But so is time travel, yet here I stand."

"You?" Carol questioned, her brows knitting together. She pointed at Charlie, her blue eyes riveted on her form. "You're the girl my father talked about. The one from the 21st century."

"In the flesh," Charlie gestured her arms wide. "Your dad had a bit of an obsession with me."

Carol had the decency to look ashamed. She cleared her throat as her gaze hit the floor, turning away from Charlie as her hands clasped in front of her. Charlie chewed her lip a moment realizing her actions towards the doctor were unfounded and based on conjecture. Just because Carol Marcus played a role in Jim's life in the films didn't mean that the same would occur now that Charlie was in the picture. She and Jim were in item before David Marcus was even a thought, and that could mean that their future was not the one from her past.

She hesitated a moment longer before she grabbed Carol's arm. "Listen, Carol," Charlie began, turning her so they faced each other. "I'm . . . sorry for the way I acted towards you. It was unprofessional and rude."

Carol's eyes widened in surprise as her head cocked to the side. "It's alright, Ensign Nol—"

"No, it's not alright," Charlie interrupted, waving away Carol's attempts to placate her. "I let my emotions get the better of me. I made a few rash decisions and judged you too quickly." She sighed, trying to figure out what she wanted to say. "I know what it's like to hide who you are and I think you did what you did for the right reasons. I just couldn't see that at the time. I treated you unfairly, and I do apologize."

Carol's brows drew together as she considered Charlie's words, looking her up and down as if debating if she spoke the truth. She must have found what she wanted because Carol sent Charlie a hesitant smile although the light of it didn't reach her eyes. There was too much pain and death in recent days for an easy smile.

"I suppose we've all been under a good deal of stress," she mollified. "I just wish that I had seen what was going on before it was too late. Perhaps things could have turned out differently." Her gaze shifted to where Jim laid prone on the table but her mind was no longer on the star ship.

"You couldn't have known," Charlie conciliated. "Trust me on this, you never find out until it's too late."

"You sound like you're speaking from experience."

Charlie snorted, moving aside as the cryotube was rushed towards them. "I know what it's like to have a father you're not . . . you're not proud of. And I know how frustrating that can be."

"I don't know how you could understand anything that I'm feeling," Carol argued, her arms rising to cross in front of her chest, far more defensive than annoyed. She dipped her head, her straw colored hair falling forward to cover her face.

Charlie rolled her eyes at the irony of that sentence, knowing _exactly_ how Carol felt in more ways than one. "The dad I know is not the same one everyone keeps talking about," she said, leaning closer to the woman. "The dad I grew up with was a bully, not a hero. Because I didn't level up to the grossly exaggerated expectations he had of me, I was useless to him."

"No father thinks that of his child," Carol argued shaking her head.

"Let me ask you this. All of your achievements and your failures, was your dad there? Did he support you when you failed and congratulate you when you succeed?"

Carol took stock of that thought, her eyes falling to floor as she thought of her life until that point. "There were times he wasn't there because of one mission or another," Carol shrugged. "But when I did see him he was tough but fair. He didn't necessarily support my failures, but he helped me correct them." Tears rose in Carol's eyes and she brushed them away with an impatient swipe of her hand.

"Remember him for that," Charlie confided, laying her hand on Carol's shoulder in support. "Your dad made a lot of mistakes. Pretty big ones and I'm not going to sugar coat his reputation. He tore me away from the only family I now have and I can never forgive him for that." Carol swallowed, her spine stiffening as if Charlie were about unleash a torrent on her and she was preparing herself. With a squeeze of her hand, Charlie added, "But I will never hold you accountable for his actions, and you shouldn't blame yourself. Neither one of us is proud of our dads, but we aren't them. We can see what they did wrong and you bet your ass we'll make damn sure we do the right thing."

Carol nodded, her smile more pronounced as Charlie dropped her hand. "If I may ask," she blurted as the nursing staff almost finished prepping for the transfer. "Why did you say that about your father? What did he do to you?"

Charlie sighed, her mind flying in a million directions as she thought of the 21st century life she left behind. "You're asking for an entire lifetime," she derided. As the heat rose in Carol's cheeks and Charlie mentally chastised herself. "Alright, one example?" she said. "When I graduated high school, I told my parents I wasn't planning on attending any military academy. I going to a state school in Colorado for archaeology and that was that. So when graduation day came, they of course watched me walk and get my diploma, but I guess the minute my name was called they left. I spent an hour trying to find them in my cap and gown, thinking they wanted pictures but they weren't there. And I guess they forgot that I rode to the ceremony with them so I had no way of getting home. I sat outside my school until it was dark before my brother, who I didn't even know was home came and got me."

Charlie glanced away from her sympathetic stare, the sting of the pain still fresh. "Turns out Bryan was going to surprise me for graduation, but because of extra drills or whatever he was delayed. My parents went to pick him up and then went out to dinner. They told him I was going out with friends until my best friend ran into them as they were leaving the restaurant. The minute Bryan learned I was still at school he came for me. He was so pissed at them. My dad had said that if I had stayed on a regimented schedule instead of leaving plans for the last minute it wouldn't have happened, like it was my fault."

"Did you tell them you were seeing your friends?" Carol asked.

Charlie snorted. "My sister had told them _she_ was hanging out with her friends. I never said I was." Carol's eyes widened in surprise as Charlie shrugged. "But that's my dad for you. It's never his fault, never his mistake. Always mine. I wasn't good enough for him and that night I realized I never would be.

"Maybe my father was a hero," she sighed. "I don't know, I've left that life behind but he was nothing more than a sperm donor to me."

"I'm sorry, Ensign," Carol tired.

"For what?" Charlie mused. "You never had a hand in that. It's just how my life was and it made me who I am now. Yes, I tried so hard to make him happy, but I know now I never could. So, I'm going to put all my energy into the now, into saving Jim and making things right between us. This is far more important than that man who gave me half of my DNA."

Carol rose taller, as if the same thought gave her confidence for what was next. "You're right," Carol agreed. "My father did a lot of awful things, but he isn't me. I'm going to do what's right." She held her hand out to Charlie who raised her brow in curiosity. "Let's shake on it: to always doing the right thing no matter who our fathers were."

Charlie smiled, grasping the woman's outstretched hand in a firm grip. Lightness came to Charlie as they shook; the weight on her shoulder's lifted as she realized she had found someone she could relate to. Carol wasn't her enemy, and in fact could become a good friend if she opened her heart to it.

As they let go, McCoy finally wheeled the cryotube over to Jim's gurney, handing Charlie a hypospray.

"Give Jim this," he said as the cold tube was slapped into her hand. Injecting the medication in Jim's blood stream, Charlie handed the empty syringe off as McCoy turned, pointing a finger at a nurse and walking around Jim's body. "Get this guy out of the cryotube; keep him in an induced coma. We're gonna put Kirk inside. It's our only chance to preserve his brain function."

"How much of Khan's blood is left?" Carol asked as the sequencing for the frozen man began. Charlie came around the table next to Carol, both sharing the same worried glance.

"None," McCoy growled, turning to one of the medical stations. "_Enterprise_ to Spock. Spock!"

McCoy was met with silence instead of the Vulcan's usual calm response.

"He's going after Khan, isn't he?" Charlie asked, stepping closer to McCoy. She remembered Spock storming out, his emotions bursting like a volcano and consuming everything around him. She remembered Vulcan's were touch telepaths and it was very possible he absorbed some of her pain too before there was hope.

"He's gonna kill him," McCoy rumbled.

"We can't do anything until Kirk's in the cryotube," Carol reasoned. With stout nods, Charlie, Bones, and Carol set to work removing the man from his cryotube. The process was slow at first, taking several tense minutes as the controls was adjusted first one way than another so that he defrosted at an even speed and temperature. If his heart started pumping with ice in his veins, the man could easily die.

"I'm getting fluctuations in his cerebral cortex," one nurse announced, her attention on the readings above the man's head.

"Decrease temperature by one point seven," McCoy ordered, swirling around the tube with his tricorder and PADD in hand. "I need 150 milligrams thiopental."

Carol injected the hypospray into the man's neck, the cover of the tube warmed up enough to reach the unconscious augment. As soon as the hiss of the medication's release, both her and Charlie turned to the board with the man's vitals, watching as the level around his brain showed no change.

"No change, Doctor," the nurse said. "His IICP is rising to seventeen mm HG. Eighteen. Nineteen!"

"Increase to 200 milligrams and add fifty units pentobarbital."

The room was scrambling to fulfill to doctor's orders. Every extra second it took to bring the man into an induced coma was one more second of Jim's brain deteriorating. Charlie rushed to do what she could, but without the medical knowledge necessary, she was at a loss of what needed to be done. All she could do was stand there, answer orders and wait. Her hand subconsciously smoothed down Jim's cooling brow, whispering soothing words as she waited for the cryotube to be emptied.

She turned to stare at his peaceful face, the lines of worry gone and the sorrow evaporated. She didn't know if Khan's blood was going to work, if it was even possible to bring Jim back from his catatonic state. It felt as if they needed Miracle Max and his chocolate covered pill in order for that marvel to come true. She was so weary from her emotional rollercoaster of the last few days that she didn't know if she could stand another heartache. She had lost the two most important men in her life in a matter of days, to have Jim pulled from her clutches again would kill her.

"He's stable, Doctor," the same nurse called, pulling Charlie from her thoughts. She brought her eyes up in enough time to see a thin man with the palest skin she'd seen and dark hair pulled from the cryotube and laid on a bio bed, a set of nurses and doctors wheeling him away as they kept him comatose.

"Bring Jim over here," McCoy called, his waving arms calling for urgency and speed. Charlie wheeled him closer to the cryotube, assisting the other nurses in removing his body from the bag. She sagged under his weight, puffing out her breath as she tried with shaking arms to lift him into the tube. McCoy rushed to help and with his assistance, they were able to place the captain gently on the inside mat. Charlie leaned over and left a small kiss on Jim's head.

"We will fix this. I promise," she whispered. "I love you."

"Activate the cryogenic sequence," McCoy ordered as Charlie stood up, her hand pressed against the sliding glass panel as she watched for any sign of change in the captain. Her heart thudded in her tight chest and she counted to ten as she tried to relieve her anxiety. So many things could wrong, so many variables they didn't account for. What concentration of Khan's blood was needed for Jim? Did they wait too late to save the captain? Even if his heart started pumping again, would he be the same man as the one who walked into the warp core chamber?

Carol's fingers flew across the touch pad on the top of the cryotube, initiating the sequence as the glass panel frosted over and Jim's core body temperature began dropping. Charlie glanced between the display panel and Jim's face for any sign of change.

"Spitfire!" Bones called, grabbing Charlie's arm and her attention. "Run up to the bridge. I can't reach Spock. I need Khan _alive_! You get that son of a bitch back onboard!"

She glanced back at her lover's body, her resolve hardening with purpose. It was her chance, her moment to save him and she'd be damned if she failed Jim when he needed her. Charlie pursed her lips and nodded once, her heart beating with hope and revenge. "Consider it done."

"Ensign Noland!" Carol called just as Charlie hit the doors. Spinning around, she watched as Carol hurried towards her. "He doesn't need to be conscious. Just alive." Charlie smirked in understanding as Carol thrust a hypospray in her hand. She turned to leave only to have Carol grab her arm again. "One more thing. I just want you to know, I never meant anything in how I acted with Captain Kirk. I've never seen him more than my commanding officer."

Charlie's head cocked to the side confused, her brows drawn together as her mouth opened in surprise. "Oh," was all she could stumble out, trying to understand where that thought came from. Had Carol read her mind before? Was she so obvious with her jealousy? Clearing her throat and shaking her head, she added, "Thanks for, uh, clarifying that, Carol. And you can call me Charlie you know?"

Carol grinned. "Charlie. I just want the best for you two. After what Doctor McCoy's said, it sounds like you two are perfect for each other."

"Thanks," Charlie smiled. "If you excuse me, I have an augment's ass to sedate." She turned and ran out the door.

The run to bridge felt like half the time than when she left. Charlie was focused, her heart beat strong and firm and her strides were long and quick. Panic wasn't a word in her vocabulary at that moment, her sense of purpose and weight of duty kept her level and grounded. She was going to save Jim. She would sedate Khan, drag his skinny ass back to the ship and bolt him to the ground to give Jim another chance at life. It wasn't his time to go, just like it wasn't time for the _Enterprise_ to crash into the shores of San Francisco. Charlie vowed that it would be decades before Jim left her in Death's icy grip.

"Where's Spock?" Charlie demanded the minute she ran onto the bridge. She took the steps two at a time, landing next to Sulu as both Chekov and Uhura spun towards her in surprise.

"Going after Khan," Uhura answered, gesturing to the screen where one man was punching the other as hard as he could. "Why?"

The fight on the screen was violent and systematic, each punch, kick, and throw set to maximum velocity and cause the most amount of pain. Spock was uninhibited, his rage obvious as he threw one hit after another. Khan was equally ferocious in his attacks. He tried everything he could to disrupt Spock's momentum, and even threw off the Vulcan nerve pinch, a move Charlie had never seen done. With one hit he sent Spock flying backwards on the transport carrier they fought on, landing on another below. Spock wasted no time as he sprinted to the edge of the ship and leap off as he followed the augment.

"Damn," Charlie mumbled her eyes wide as she watched the fighting continue.

"Spock's a hell of a fighter," Sulu conceded.

"We need Khan back on this ship," Charlie directed as she acknowledged Sulu's position in the command chair. "Like now. McCoy thinks his blood is the only thing that can save Jim. We need him up here and we need him alive so can we hurry it along?"

"Can we beam them up to the ship?" Sulu asked Chekov.

Chekov spun around to his controls, his fingers a blur of movement. "Zhey keep moving," he sighed exasperated. "I can't get a lock on either of them."

"Can you beam someone down?" Uhura asked just as Spock took a huge blow from Khan's fist.

"I tink so," Chekov nodded. "Ze target is large enough I should be able to compenzate."

"Well make it two, Chekov," Charlie announced, stepping up next to Uhura. "I wouldn't mind a crack at the bastard myself."

Uhura smirked as she nodded in agreement, both spinning to Sulu for permission.

"Go get him," Sulu ordered.

They need no other encouragement. Both women ran off the Bridge, stopping only long enough to grab a phaser before they sprinted into the transporter room and onto the pad.

"Remember we need him alive," Uhura reminded, sending Charlie a pointed look.

"I'm not going to kill him," Charlie rolled her eyes, checking to make sure she had the hypospray firmly positioned in one hand and the solid handle of the phaser in the other. "Help rough him up a bit, maybe. No promises there."

She shook her head, but conceded, "Can't blame you there."

"Noland to Bridge. Do you have the coordinates, Chekov?" Charlie called.

"Da!" he shouted. "Sending now."

"Coordinates received," the transporter engineer said.

"Energize," Charlie commanded, the tingling of the energy beams and the white lights a welcomed relief. It was time to give Khan what he deserved. While he wasn't the one to pull the plug on Jim's life, his blatant disregard of the men and women onboard the _Enterprise_ made him no more innocent than if he had shot Jim point blank.

* * *

><p>The air was rushing past the women when they materialized on the transport vehicle, their hair blowing onto their eyes and the hot sun shining down on their heads. Spinning around, Khan had Spock pinned on the edge, his long fingers wrapped around the skull of the Vulcan as he began to squeeze with all his strength. Before Uhura could even lift her phaser, Charlie ran forward, slamming her weapon into the side of Khan's head and knocking him aside. The augment fell with a scream, pulling Spock with him as they crashed unto the red metal.<p>

"That was for Jim you son of bitch," she spat, rising her phaser as she let off a volley of stun shots.

Khan roared as he stood, the stuns only forcing him back instead of incapacitating him. Spock groaned as he rolled onto his side, Uhura rushing around Charlie to aid her boyfriend as Charlie played decoy, backing up as she led the murderer away.

"Isn't this quaint," Khan growled, each step measured as he drew closer to her. "Still trying to play the hero, Charlotte?"

"At least I'm not the villain."

"You just don't know when to give up, do you?" he responded, running at her with such speed, Charlie didn't have time to register he had moved before she felt herself crashing onto the floor, the air forcibly ejected from her lungs. His hands were around her throat a second later, and as Charlie clawed at the strong fingers strangling her, she realized she had dropped the hypospray. She panicked then, trashing around she pulled at the appendages, trying to pry them from her neck. Black spots danced in front of her eyes, her heart trying to pump life-giving oxygen to a brain starving for it. She considered giving up for one moment, to join Jim in the blessed afterlife, but a strong, clear voice cut through the haze, _"Improvise. Adapt. Overcome."_

Her eyes snapped open as she remembered the training Pike had given her as she waited for Jim to return. His supervision and advice allowed her to excel in her defense classes, becoming one of the top students in her level. Glancing around as she analyzed her situation, Charlie understood her choices were limited and made one drastic grab at freedom. Charlie reached up and grabbed the sides of Khan's head, digging her thumbs into his eye sockets as hard as she could. The grip on her neck loosened and she sucked in the sweet taste of fresh air, her mind clearing as she pressed harder. Slowly, she directed Khan off, gritting her teeth against the strength it took to move the man and let her escape. When she was in a better position, she brought her foot up and kicked him as hard as she could as she sent him flying back. Charlie rolled to side, coughing violently as her hand came up to survey her bruised and throbbing throat.

Khan bellowed as he stood his glare frightening as he turned to her. His mouth was set in a deep scowl and his brows low over his storming eyes as he stepped closer. Charlie swallowed, her eyes going wide before Spock slammed a thick piece of metal he had ripped from the ship into the side of Khan's head, sending the man staggering to his knees. The few moments Charlie had Khan's attention had given the Vulcan enough time to recover and he attacked the dazed augment with all the ferocity of a grieving man.

"Charlie!" Uhura shouted as the men began fighting again, Spock clearly holding the upper hand, dislocating Khan's shoulder and sending him to the ground. Spock then straddled the man and laid into his face with his fists. Charlie turned to Uhura in enough time to see the dropped hypospray slide across the deck and into her outstretched hands.

"Spock!" Uhura called once she say Charlie stagger to her feet. "Spock! Stop! Stop!" The Vulcan ignored her as he rage took hold, each crack of bone and flesh disturbing and grotesque, lesser men no doubt succumbing to the relentless Vulcan assault. Frustrated, Uhura looked to Charlie who clenched the hypospray in her shaking grip, the rushing wind throwing the escaped hair from her ponytail into her face and her neck pulsing with pain.

Not knowing what else to do, Charlie shouted, "He's our only chance to save Jim!"

Spock paused, his stunned gaze turning first to Charlie and then Uhura who gave a curt nod. Khan was dazed under Spock's feet and before the Vulcan could cause any more damage, Charlie rushed forward, shoving the First Officer off the augment and administrating the hypospray.

As Khan lay prone at her feet, his eyes rolling into the back of his skull, Charlie growled, "Time for you do some good you bastard." And then for her own benefit, she reared back and kicked him as hard as she could. Nodding once, she turned to see both Uhura and Spock staring at her incredulously.

"What?" she asked just as the white lights of the transporter swirled and they were pulled back to the _Enterprise._


	19. Chapter Nineteen: Remember to Smile

**Chapter Nineteen: Remember to Smile**

Charlie helped Spock drag Khan's unconscious body from the transporter room to Sickbay. She struggled under the dead weight of the augment, but her stubborn nature gave no room to complain. She wasn't going to stop and let the Vulcan take all the weight, just as she wasn't going to let Jim suffer any more than he had because she didn't have the strength to finish the job. They were a team, a family and she was going to pull her own weight no matter the cost. As they passed the large security doors into the medical center, she didn't protest when a nurse took the man from her arms, stretching her shoulder and the tension in her arm. As the team of nurses laid Khan on a bio bed, Charlie headed over to McCoy who was at his desk reviewing his notes on the tribble.

"How's he doing?" she choked, her hand reaching up to her throat as her eyes flickering to the cryotube and back.

McCoy sighed, reaching up to rub his tired eyes. "The cryogenic sequence seemed to take," he explained, leaning against the back of his chair and swiveling back and forth. "It's going to be tricky pulling him out, but I don't think there will be a problem." Charlie nodded, watching the nurses prep the augment; including strapping him down to the bed should he regain consciousness before he was scheduled to. "How was taking down superman over there?"

Charlie shrugged, reaching up to pull her hair back into a reasonable ponytail behind her head. "It was as easy as pie."

"Goddamn, Spitfire!" McCoy exclaimed, jumping to his feet as he grabbed his tricorder and shoved it under her chin. "You're lucky you can speak right now!"

She tried to back away from the doctor's incessant scanning, but he had managed to corner her between the desk and his chair. "I'm fine, McCoy," she tried, reaching up to push the man away but he wouldn't budge. "Really. The throbbing's manageable."

"Like hell you are," he barked. "Your hyoid bone has a hairline fracture and there is bruising to your larynx."

"Is that all?" she croaked with a roll of her eyes.

The glare sent her way was fierce. "You're lucky I like you, Spitfire because otherwise I might let this heal on its own."

"But you _do_ like me," she pointed out. "Don't forget, I'm the sister you never had."

McCoy rolled his eyes as he took the dermal regenerator and began running it around the base of her throat. The bruises dissolved slowly, the purple and black imprints of Khan's hands leaving her white skin, turning first to green, then yellow, and then fading away entirely.

"Now try not to add anymore to your cacophony of injuries, Ensign," he ordered, replacing the tool in its location on his medical belt.

"We're ready, Doctor," a nurse called, gaining McCoy's attention.

"Be right there," he answered. "I mean it," he added, glaring into Charlie's dark eyes.

"I can make no promises, Doctor," Charlie said, he hands raised. "Jim told me to protect this ship, and if for some reason this doesn't work—"

"It's going to work," he snapped. "I'm not going to let that son of bitch win. Not while I still live and breathe."

The nodule of humor Charlie had vanished, and she glanced down at her trembling hands. "What do you need me to do?"

"Wait in my office."

"What?!" she shouted, her incredulous gaze snapping to his. "Do you honestly expect me to sit around and _wait_? I can help."

"Not this time," McCoy said, grabbing her shoulders and almost throwing her into his office. "I need to concentrate and I won't be able to do that with you hovering over me. And yes, you will hover. No, don't deny it," he added as Charlie opened her mouth. She snapped her jaw closed and glared at the obstinate doctor.

"And just what am I supposed to do in here? File?"

"I'll get you once we start the transfusion," he barked. "But if anything happens I'm kicking you out, you got that?"

She only glared at the man, standing on her tiptoes with her hands on her hips so she could attempt to look him in the eye.

McCoy sighed, running a frustrated hand down his face, glancing upward as a silent prayer rushed past his lips. "I can understand why you want to help," he placated. "But right now, Charlie, I need experts. You're doing really well for someone from the 21st century, but I need 23rd century science right now. And you're emotionally compromised."

"When did you become the Vulcan?" she glared.

"It's for your own good. I promise that as soon as I administer Khan's blood, I'll come get you."

Charlie mulled the thought a moment, wanting to argue against the doctor, but sheer exhaustion had her head fuzzy and her eyes drooping. "Fine, but not a second later," she ordered, pointing an accusatory finger at the man. With a huff, she spun on her heel and slammed her hand against the panel to close the door. If she couldn't slam the door in the doctor's face, at least she could get her point across another way.

For eighty agonizing minutes, she paced in front of those doors. She ran a tired hand down her face, knowing she should take the break to catch even a quick catnap, but every time she laid on the couch in McCoy's office and attempted to close her eyes, her mind replayed the last moment of Jim's life and she bolted upright. As the wait continued, just the hint of footsteps had her clamoring to the entrance only to have the individual walk by and continue on their way. She tried to sit, to relax, to meditate. She tried all manner of calm techniques prescribed by her therapists, but her heart would not quell its thundering in her ribcage. Not until she knew whether or not their plan worked.

If Jim, no, _when_ Jim woke up, Charlie was going to make sure he never would have to sacrifice himself for them again. It was her solemn duty to make sure he stayed the captain of the _Enterprise_ for decades to come. She would protect him no matter the cost. She couldn't lose him again, not like she had. She even felt a kinship to Jim's absent mother, understanding the heartache she must have gone through when George Kirk sacrificed himself to save them. And Charlie didn't even have a newborn child to care for.

Finally, the door swished opened and McCoy stepped in, a thin bead of sweat along his brow and exhaustion in his façade.

"Well?" Charlie gasped, jumping to her feet.

"We're pumping his heart and lungs right now to keep the blood flowing and stop any more cellular damage, but so far there's no brain activity," McCoy said. "The radiation goes all the way down to a molecular level. I'm surprised he made it to the core, let alone back out again."

"What about Khan's blood?" Charlie said. "Isn't it supposed to heal him?"

"It's going to take time," McCoy answered gently, laying a supporting hand on her sagging shoulders as the tears threatened to return.

"Can I—can I see him?"

"Yeah, come on."

McCoy led her back into Sickbay, but directed her over to a very familiar room tucked away in the corner. It was the same whitewashed, quarantined space where she woke up months ago when she protected her friends from a Klingon attack. Just one glance through the window next to the door had Charlie reeling back.

Both men were comatose on beds next to each other, a nexus of tubes and cables strung between them, all connecting to a central machine. Dark red blood fed from Khan's arm and leg fed into the device before it exited into Jim, one tube attaching to the side of his neck into his arm and another to this leg. Charlie pressed her face against the glass, one hand coming up to hide the horror at what she saw. The blood flowed from one to the other, a machine filled Jim's lungs with oxygenated air as another kept his heart pumping.

"Can I go in?" Charlie asked, her hopeful gaze pleading with McCoy.

"Not right now," McCoy denied as he shook his head. "The transfusion is delicate as it is. I'm only letting one nurse in to help me. I can't risk a contamination." She nodded in understanding, turning to stare back at the man separated again by an impenetrable force. "Listen kid, there's not much that's going to be going on for the next few hours. Why don't you go pull out the cot in my office and try to get some sleep. I promise I'll wake you if there's a change."

Charlie considered arguing, but knowing Jim was in the best possible hands and that nothing more could be done until the transfusion was complete, she agreed with a small dip of her head. She stumbled back to McCoy's office, her eyes barely able to keep open as the last few hours caught up with her. She had just flipped the cot out from the wall when she collapsed on it, her eyes closing as she curled into a ball. Like her grandmother always said. Things were always brighter in the morning.

* * *

><p>Charlie blinked open to a darkened room, someone having come in to dim the lights and remove her shoes. Sitting up, she rubbed the sleep from her eyes, glancing around at the quiet office and equally silent sickbay. She swung her legs over, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees as she head fell into her hands, trying to wipe away the dreams and fear. With an affirmed deep breath, she slid on her boots.<p>

"Lights, eighty percent," she ordered as she stood, readjusting her dress and retying her tangled hair in a bun behind her head.

Stepping into the empty medical center, she checked the chronometer on the wall flashing _23:48._ Almost midnight. With a sigh, she glanced around to see if she could spot McCoy but he wasn't anywhere around.

Too wired to return to bed in her own quarters, she walked over to the quarantined room. As she peeked inside, she was surprised to see the doctor standing over Jim's bed with a PADD in hand. She raised her hand up to knock, but thought better of it. Instead, she stepped into the side chamber and activated the decontamination sequence. A brush of cool air blew across her face and body as ultraviolet rays burned down on her head and a slight mist accompanied the air. After only thirty seconds, the door at the other end unlocked as a voice announced she was free from contaminates.

"How's he doing?" she asked as she slipped into the room.

McCoy jumped, the PADD sliding out of his hands as he clamored to kept hold. "Jesus!" he swore, getting himself back under control and shooting a glare at her. "I told you not to come in here."

"You may have," she agreed, shrugging. "But I went through the decontamination chamber. I'm clean, McCoy. I want to see Jim."

He just harrumphed as he turned his attention back to his PADD. "All his vitals are stable but there's still no change in neural activity. I even increased the potency of the serum to try to help. So far nothing."

She nodded, watching as Jim's chest rose and fell only by the work of the tube attached to his mouth. Even in the 23rd century, life support systems were still hard to acknowledge.

"I've been ordered to move Jim into the main medical facility back on HQ," McCoy continued, peeking at her above his readings. "We'll be leaving at 0:800."

"Can he be transported?" Charlie asked the thought of moving him terrifying.

"We'll be able to as long as—"

Suddenly an alarm sounded, Jim's body rearing up as if electrocuted, the veins in his neck popping out against his skin as his back arched off the bed.

"Shit!" McCoy shouted, dropping his PADD as he snatched up his tricorder. "Charlie, see that case over there? Get me a hypospray with 200 mg adrenaline and 400 amiodarone."

"Yes, sir," she answered, running to the case and throwing it open. While it may have been only seconds, it felt to Charlie that it took her far longer than it should to find the necessary drugs and to fill the canister with the appropriate dosage. Her hands were shaking as she checked to make sure she had everything right.

"Here, Bones!" she shouted, tossing him the injector as he fed the direct line into Jim's neck. They waited anxious seconds as Jim held his tensed, prone position before he relaxed, the heart monitor that had spiked before calming down to healthy levels. Charlie had Jim's hand clasped firmly in her own, trying to will him to relaxation and back to her.

"Damn, that was close," McCoy, sighed, bracing himself against the wall for a moment. He didn't notice what Charlie had, her eyes widening the longer she stared at the screen above his bed. They had done it.

"Len, look," she said pointing.

He angled his head around, his own gaze widening in astonishment. Whipping out his instruments again, he measured Jim's neural activity shaking his head as a smile came to his face.

"Well I'll be damned," he muttered, his face shining. "We did it, kid. He's back."

* * *

><p>The shuttle ride to the Starfleet facility was long and agonizing as Charlie accompanied the medical team back to Earth. Several members of senior command were already in briefings with Starfleet's top brass and the President of the Federation, giving Charlie the freedom to follow after Jim. While she had made a weak argument about performing her duty to help set the ship for repair, both Spock and Sulu ordered her off the bridge and away from the <em>Enterprise<em>. They knew she wouldn't be able to get much done with her concern on the captain, and she didn't protest when they commanded her to be the _Enterprise_ liaison down on Earth.

After the initial shock the night before, Jim's brain activity steadily rose throughout the night and following morning, but he didn't wake. He was as still as death but he no longer needed the machine to keep him alive. His heart continued to beat in his chest and his breathing was shallow but normal. Once they landed, it took until the early afternoon before he was in his own room at Starfleet Medical. The top doctors came to discuss his miraculous saving of the Federation's golden boy with McCoy, forcing Charlie out into the campus of Starfleet Academy until the meetings were complete.

As she wandered through the cadets in their red uniforms and the instructors in black, she kept catching snippets of discussion about the crash of _Vengeance_, the _Enterprise_ coming to the rescue again, and how Marcus turned traitor. She shook her head by some of the outlandish rumors already circulating, but since she was still an unknown entity to the majority of the population, she found herself unwilling to correct them. She enjoyed her anonymity, wandering through the throngs of people with her mind distracted.

As she continued to walk, letting her feet carry her where they willed, she spotted the tall dark head of the Academy's Commander Admiral Barnett. He was heading her way, his attention riveted on the PADD in front of up until he glanced up and caught Charlie's eye. With a small smile, he stopped her on the pathway, tucking the tablet under his arm as he surveyed her.

"Good afternoon, Miss Noland, excuse me, Ensign Noland," he stumbled noticing her rank and uniform.

"Admiral," she saluted. "Not really an ensign anymore. I was only an acting one for the mission involving John Harrison. Now that that's over I'm back to being a civilian. I just, uh, haven't had a chance to change."

"Yes," he nodded. "I've been briefed on the situation. The loss of Admiral Marcus has created a deep void in Starfleet Command."

Charlie forced herself to keep her face relaxed even though a myriad of thoughts and statements wanted to spew from her mouth regarding the former admiral. Instead, she mustered was a noncommittal "Yes, Sir" in response.

"I understand Admiral Pike was close to you as well," he continued, his dark gaze sharp and calculating.

"Yes," she nodded, her head dipping as she tried to reign in her emotions. The very mention of the man had the tears rising and her hands shaking with suppressed grief. "He has been instrumental part in my life over the last few months. I will miss him greatly."

"You know he came to talk to me a few weeks ago," Admiral Barnett said. "About you."

Charlie's head snapped up at that, her eyes going wide as she stared at the tall man in disbelief. "He did?"

"Yes," he nodded. "Seemed to think that not recruiting you into our accelerated officers program would be a giant oversight on our part. Said that you're just as smart as Kirk with far more tact. That's high praise coming from him."

Charlie blinked at the man in astonishment, her mouth hanging open in surprise as she tried to think of the appropriate response only to come up empty. "I—" she stumbled, her mouth gone dry.

Luckily the Admiral chuckled, patting Charlie on the shoulder. "Pike was one of our best recruiters, and I take him at his word. He wouldn't have recommended you to me if he didn't think you were good enough. And if you assisted with John Harrison, you every well could be. I expect your application on my desk no later than next week for enrollment in September. Understood?"

Charlie smiled, so surprised by the way her life had changed in the space of ten minutes. Saluting the admiral, she said. "Yes, Sir!"

"Who knows, might have you back on the _Enterprise _in two years if you're as smart as Pike thought you were."

Charlie nodded. "Thank you, Admiral. This is something I needed to hear today."

"With the way the Federation has been moving the last few years, we're going to need officers more like Kirk than I care to admit," he said, his pensive eyes shifting the wreckage of San Francisco. "Pike thought you'd be one of those. I do too."

At that moment, the communicator on her waist started ringing, causing her to jump in surprise. "But we will discuss this later. Have a good afternoon, _Cadet_ Noland," he winked and then continued on his way.

* * *

><p>Charlie spent the rest of the quiet afternoon reading up on the enrollment process and what type of program she'd fall into once she entered the Academy. Luckily for her, Admiral Barnett had sent over much of the information to her personal email so as she sat by Jim's side, she had something to work on.<p>

As the hours dragged, various members of the _Enterprise_ crew came to see how their ailing captain was faring. Scotty brought a bottle of whiskey, commenting it was to help Charlie's fortitude while she waited. Sulu and Chekov stopped by to update her on the status of the ship and the debriefings so far. They thought should Jim wake up he would want to know, and it also kept her privy to Starfleet's thinking of the Khan event. Even Carol came by with flowers for Jim and a case full of mini shampoos and face washes for Charlie. "Just in case," she had said.

Finally, Spock and Uhura stopped by the next morning, both looking far more rested and put together than Charlie felt. Although she had had a quick shower and changed her clothes back at Jim's empty apartment, Charlie barely made it through half the night before she was back in the hospital room.

"How's he doing?" Uhura asked, taking a seat next to Charlie.

"No change," Charlie answered with a shake of her head. "His brain activity has stabilized and so has his heart rate, but he won't wake up."

"The likelihood of the captain recovering such an ordeal was only .04%, Ensign," Spock said, his hands clasped behind his back as remained standing behind Uhura. "The fact that Doctor McCoy was able to revive brain function is an extraordinary phenomenon."

"He means Jim is doing well and will probably wake up soon," Uhura translated, shooting a glare at the Vulcan over her shoulder.

"Thanks," Charlie smiled just as McCoy walked in.

"What is this; a goddamn powwow?" he growled.

"It's called visiting hours, Bones," Charlie rolled her eyes. "People actually like Jim and want to see how he's doing."

"Lord knows why," he mumbled without heat, his attention riveted on Jim's scans as he too awaited the captain's revival.

"Is the prognosis improving, doctor?" Spock inquired, a subtle concern flashing in his dark eyes.

"Well seeing as he was dead, Commander and now he isn't yes, it's improving."

"When do you think he shall awake?" the Vulcan persisted.

"Dammit man, I'm a doctor not a physic. He will wake up when he is good and ready. The longer he sleeps, the better it is to remove and heal his irradiated cells." McCoy sobered then, less grumpy and far more serious. "The fact that Khan's blood even worked is a miracle. We'll just have to hope for another one." His somber gaze fell on Jim, before he turned back to his work.

"Thank you, Doctor," Spock acknowledged as Uhura stood, grasping Charlie's hand in support.

"He'll get better, Charlie," Uhura said. "He's Kirk. He's too arrogant and stubborn to leave us this early. His ego's gonna be huge when we wakes up and realizes he saved the ship.

Charlie laughed, noticing McCoy smirking from the corner of her eye. "Thanks for coming by."

"We will leave you now," Spock added, dipping his head to both McCoy and Charlie as he guided Uhura from the hospital room. "Farewell, Ensign Noland." At the door, he paused and glanced back to her. "Please inform either me or the Lieutenant if there is any change."

"I will," she answered.

"You should probably head home too, Spitfire," McCoy said as he checked the data on his PADD and then up at the screen above Jim's bed.

Charlie shifted in her chair, trying to find the most comfortable position. "I will stay with him until he wakes up, Bones. I don't care how long it takes."

"That could be days or weeks, Charlie."

"Then I will be here till then."

"Charlie—"

"I won't leave him," she snapped, glaring at the doctor. "I can't. Not after— You're gonna have to hit me with a tranquilizer to get me out of here, and I don't know if you really want to test my new fighting skills."

McCoy paused, scowling. "Anyone ever tell you that you're the most stubborn woman in the universe?" But there was no heat behind his words.

Charlie smirked, the light not reaching her eyes. "Once or twice, but I don't listen to needless gossip."

McCoy tucked his data PADD under his arm and nodded. "Well you better make sure you get food and sleep, because I _will_ tranquilize your ass, fighting skills or not. Understand me, Spitfire?"

Charlie nodded as she turned back to Jim's bed side, her hand firmly clasped in his relaxed one, her eyes never leaving his chest for fear it wouldn't rise with the next breath. "You have my word, McCoy."

The doctor left then, squeezing her shoulder in support and other than a nurse who came in every couple of hours to check Jim's vitals, Charlie was left alone with the captain in the stark white room, watching the sun's rays move along the walls. After hours of silence and prayer, the urge to tell Jim everything bubbled over and Charlie began to talk.

"You know I thought you were an arrogant bastard the first time I met you." She chuckled to herself, thinking of the first few days on the _Enterprise_ as she ran her free hand across the back of his_._ "I was so scared you were going to think Kate, Philly, and I were nuts. That you would ship us off to some psych ward and forget about us because it was too unbelievable where we came from. Even now, I have to pinch my arm sometimes to remind myself I'm here.

"They wanted to go home so badly. Every time I walked into those quarters, the same question shined in their eyes. But I think even then I knew even then I wasn't going to. My life wasn't the amazing adventure I thought it was going to be back home, and being with you gave me everything I had only ever dreamed of."

She took a breath, still stroking his hand as her eyes were drawn downward, her lips caught between her teeth. "I never told you this because I didn't know how," she continued, as if the words were dragged from her lips. "You always said you were surprised by how well I adapted to life here. That I took to the courses and the work easily. Well . . . the truth is . . . I already knew about your world." Charlie shifted and glanced behind her towards the doorway. The lights were shinning bright in the hallway while the only light in the hospital room came from the city's glow outside. With no nurse coming to check on her patient, she continued, her eyes moving back to his slow moving chest and his peaceful face. "You're probably wondering how a girl from the 21st century could know anything about the 23rd, but the truth is I come from a different universe; you could even say a different dimension. I don't know how Sagan found me; maybe going back in time isn't what we think it is, but whatever happened, he came to a world where your exploits into the unknown were already charted."

Again, Charlie paused, listening for the footsteps of a nurse or for any change in Jim's condition. The stillness remained intact and Jim continued to breathe in and out in a rhythmic fashion, the heart monitor showing no change as it beeped every second or so.

"In my universe, there were no augments, no Eugenics War which I assume means there will not be a World War III. At least one spawned from those events. I also don't know if Cochran will develop warp technology nor do I know anything about the future of my world. You see, I know about the Federation and Starfleet . . . and you because of a TV show that came out in the 1960s called _Star Trek_. I know, television, crazy right? It centered on you and Spock and all the others and your journeys on a five-year mission into deep space. Can you imagine McCoy on TV?"

She chuckled at her own joke, gently stroking the hand she held firm in her own.

"It had a few corny moments, but it was the '60s, so what can you expect? The premise was the same, though. Spock was just as annoying, Uhura as captivating and you? God, I don't think there was a moment you weren't trying to get into a girl's pants." Charlie grinned, some tears coming to her eyes. "You kept having these amazing adventures and meeting strange new species. The _Enterprise _hasn't changed though. She was just as majestic as I always thought she would be, the first time I saw her. And of course you all were always getting into trouble."

Charlie frowned, the bruising all but gone from his face but the same death pallor appeared to linger. "There were also movies," Charlie added, pushing that moment from her conscious. "Six of them, plus conventions and all manner of other things that surrounded _Star Trek_. You know your fans are called Trekkers? Ha, that's strange calling them your fans." She squeezed his limp hand, reaching up with her other one to brush away the tears threatening to spill.

"The show did a lot of good too. _Star Trek_ brought science and diversity to the forefront of the world's audiences. It came out when the Apollo missions were at their height, and the civil rights movement, and then in the '80s when computers were beginning to become household objects. A lot of scientists, and engineers, and computer programmers became what they were because of you. I know you can't understand how that is possible, especially in a world as advanced as this, but you played a huge role in the past. You and Spock and everyone shaped the world I grew up in even if you can't see it.

"I only knew a little about you though. When I was born _Star Trek: The Next Generation _had come out. I grew up watching that; watching Captain Jean-Luc Picard and the rest of the _Enterprise-D_ crew as they followed in your footsteps. It's set eighty years from now I think. In that program, Klingons and the Federation were solid allies, and they even had one on the bridge! I know you couldn't ever see it now, I can't really even though I know it will happen; at least I think it will.

"See your universe isn't like the one I knew. Vulcan existed and there was never Nero or Sagan or anything like that. I don't know what happened, or why it changed. So technically I never lied. I truly don't know what is going to happen because your world is different. I just have a vague idea." She paused then, mulling her thoughts and how much she wanted to say. She didn't know if he could hear her, but if he could, did she want to divulge everything?

Charlie shook her head. If she couldn't be completely honest with him, even while he was in a coma, could she ever be open with him? "See," she choked, the emotion behind her words causing her voice to catch. "I pushed you away because the Jim Kirk I knew never had a love like what we have. I mean prime universe you had a kid with Carol Marcus, but she was a scientist, not a weapons specialist. What you and I have, I'm so terrified it won't work. That you're going to wake up one day and realize I'm holding you back. As hard as I try to study and will myself to learn, I'm never going to be as advanced and as smart as you. I'm limited, Jim, and I always will be. It's just how the cards fell when I came here. I can't imagine how I would have ended up if I didn't know anything about this world."

This time when the tears fell, she made no move to stop them. Each droplet of water ran down her cheek, plopping on the bed and their joined hands. "When you . . . died, a part of me went with you. I know that's a bit cliché, but you're my world right now, Jim. I'm lost without you, and as much as I hate thinking about it, I'm dependent on you.

"That is why, starting in September I'll be enrolled at the Academy. Admiral Bennett already accepted me. I'll be on an accelerated course, and because I already had a semester of classes I should be done in two years, but I'll be working non-stop. I don't know what this means for us, but with your accident, I can't be dependent on anyone but myself. I love you more than I ever thought I could and that's why I'm doing this. I know you are going to support me, but I'm not going to always be there for you. I haven't told anyone yet; I'm not sure I can. Maybe you when you wake up you can help me?

"But you have to wake up, Jim. I can't do anything until I know you're going to be okay."

He didn't change. His eyes remained closed and his breathing even. He didn't even squeeze her hand to let her know he was still there. Charlie closed her eyes, her heart too heavy and aching to put up the front anymore. She broke down, tears cascading from her eyes as she laid her head next to their joined hands, sobbing into the blanket. She cried for Jim, she cried for Pike, she cried for herself and everything she held in over the past few weeks. She cried because she didn't know what else to do. She cried until she couldn't anymore, falling asleep next to their joined hands.

* * *

><p><strong>Only One more to go!<strong>


	20. Chapter Twenty: Noble Maiden Fair

** I am so so so sorry! I had every intention of having this out last week, but my fiance was up from Florida and we had a million wedding things to do. A million times over I apologize!**

On another note, this is it! We are at the end! Talk about a rollercoaster of an adventure. Thank you to everyone who had reviewed, favorited, added to alter lists and just read for the hell of it. To each and everyone of you I dedicate this chapter. You're the reason I was able to finish it, and I hope you enjoy the last installment.

**I'm going to take a bit of break until the next story (yes, I can hear you screaming there will be another) but it's T minus 5 months until my wedding so my attention must be allocated to that. Not to mention my three jobs, three film projects, and trying to put sleeping and eating into that. I will try to get something up before Christmas but if you don't see anything until after the new year, don't be too surprised. **

_Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoy it! Until next time!_

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Twenty: <strong>**Noble Maiden Fair**

_Charlie leaned against the rails of the balcony, staring up at the crescent moon and cacophony of stars shining their soft light on the slumbering city. She sighed as she wrapped her arms around herself to ward against the cool night air, her amber eyes moving from one bright point in the sky to the next. To an outsider, she just appeared to seek solace from their light, but if they looked closer they could see she was searching for something among the heavens. Although her eyes burned and exhaustion tugged at her bones, she couldn't sleep. The nightmares that had been gone for weeks reappeared that night when their icy fingers wormed into her unconscious brain. Waking up with a cold sweat and a pounding heart, Charlie had wanted to scream in frustration. She had been so close to freedom, to enjoying sleep-filled nights and finally feeling rested when she awoke. Now she wondered if she would watch another dawn break the horizon after weeks of ignoring the coming rays._

_Earlier in the day, she had had a rather spirited discussion with Admiral Marcus, one that left her shaking and angry and no doubt the cause of her returning nightmares. Recalling the way his green eyes narrowed and his mouth frowned as he shot one accusation after another, she shivered more from the distrustful demeanor of Marcus than the night air. He wanted her. Not in a sexual or perverted way, but something she couldn't determine. His questions had ranged from her home life, her education, her family, history, but nothing that pinpointed what he wanted. His questions about her family had been the most telling, but with the wide range from which he asked, she didn't know why he cared. _

_She shook the mystery from her head with sigh, returning to her search of the sky when a light came on behind her and a man limped out in his dark blue robe._

"_While I applaud your devotion to studying the stars, it's almost three in the morning and one of us has a test at 08:00," Pike said pointedly as he shuffled to her side. _

_She half smirked and rolled her eyes, but remained silent. _

"_The nightmares again?"_

_The smile slipped and her shoulders drooped as she glanced away. She nodded once and didn't protest when an arm wrapped around her shoulders, his body heat welcomed after the cold. "It's okay, you know," Pike whispered, bringing her into his side. "You're going to relapse, it happens to all of us. Just make sure you take two steps forward to make up for this one step back."_

"_It's hard, remembering what happened," she mumbled, clutching as the soft fabric as the images of lifeless bodies flashed behind her lids. "And I keep having these dreams of Jim or you dying. Am I horrible for that?" She turned to him, her eyes pleading for reassurance. She couldn't understand why their death was her nightmare when it had been Charlie who was subjected to the Klingon attack._

_Pike frowned and pulled her closer, his tense body betraying the calm in his voice. "Do you try to stop it?"_

"_Yes!" she exclaimed as she snapped her head up, almost shoving the man away as she turned to stare out at the snoozing city. "But I either come in after it's already happened or I can't stop it. No matter what I do, I can't stop it." Her voice faded as the fear came back and she shivered from the power of it._

"_Now you listen to me," he declared, pulling out his admiral voice that brokered no room for argument. "Nothing is going to happen. You're not going to lose Jim and you're certainly not going to lose me. No matter what happens one of us will always be there for you."_

_She shook her head, even the warm of his body next to hers didn't stop the cold from seeping into her core. "What if you're not?" she whispered. "What if something happens and you're gone? I don't know what I would do. When I was with the Klingons, I learned how much I need help in this world. I can't be alone in it."_

"_Something you're forgetting, Charlie. You're not alone in this. You have people here who love you, who will support you. You don't have to fix everything yourself."_

_She frowned and glanced back up at the twinkling stars, wishing she knew which one Jim orbited._

"_I know," she sighed. "I've made so many friends here; more than I ever had at home. And the crew is closer to me than my own family was. It's that bond that scares me, Pike. I have so much more to lose if I fail."_

"_But you have more to gain just by playing," he pointed out. "The life of a Starfleet officer is never easy. It's full of turmoil, danger, and many lose their lives in service because they believe in the betterment of the Federation. You're going to lose people you know, and some you may love, but remember we're in this together. It's like you tell me: cor uny thingy."_

_She grinned and shook her head. "Cor unum, via una?"_

_He smiled and nodded. "Yeah, that. It's a hard life, what Jim and I chose, and I hope you decide to join us. But what we learn and achieve outweighs the dangers we face. Once you're up there, you'll see. Now, c'mon, let's go inside." _

_Pike turned to head back into the apartment. Charlie just stared at the sky lost in thought her mind billions of miles away._

"_Charlie? Charlie . . . _Charlie!"

Charlie snapped to attention, rubbing her burning eyes as she glanced at McCoy standing in the doorway of the hospital room with a scowl on his face and his hands on his hips.

"What?" she stuttered as a flash of guilt shot through her from McCoy's exasperated glare.

"I said, when was the last time you ate anything or slept more than two hours, Spitfire," he repeated.

"Recently," she mumbled with a sheepish glance at the scowling doctor. She peeked around at the stark white walls, the light streaming into the hospital room from the brilliant summer sun. It was midafternoon and her day had already been spent at Jim's side. She ran a hand down her tired face, trying to bring herself back to the present as the echoes of the past still rang in her ears.

"Yeah, alright, _how_ recently?"

She clenched her teeth, annoyed by the barrage of questions as the doctor stepped towards her. "Well I ate a granola bar earlier."

"You haven't left the hospital room in two days," he accused.

"Not true! I had to get that granola bar."

"Charlie, I told you—"

"Yes, alright," she snapped rolling her eyes as she tried to temper her anger. She took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. Her attention moved from the gruff man to the still sleeping captain as she added, "I understand you mean well, McCoy. I'm trying to take care of myself, but I worry that if I leave something might happen. He could relapse, or the blood could do something weird. I can't risk not being here for him."

"Weird how?"

"I don't know," she sighed, catching her lip between her teeth as she leaned against the back of the uncomfortable chair. The exhaustion of the wait crept up on her sooner and sooner each day they waited for the man to awaken. She tried to down play the seriousness of her worry with jokes and light banter, but with it being two weeks since Jim rescued the _Enterprise_, she was finding it harder to put on the façade for others. With a voice as quiet and still as a graveyard she mumbled, "I'm afraid it might be something Khan related."

"What? That Jim will become a raging superhuman with maniacal tendencies?"

She shrugged innocently, but it was something she had considered. When Jim woke up, would Khan's genetically engineered blood create another monster, or would his strength of character and stubbornness keep him as the same arrogant captain she fell in love with. Would he change for the worse or would he even remember what happened? All she knew was he had to wake up for any of that to happen. To know where he stood and what waited in his recovery.

McCoy scoffed at her admission, his eyes practically disappearing as he rolled them. "Please," he derided, shaking his head as he took in the hours' worth of readings and vitals.

"Well has that tribble changed any?" she tried.

"Other than multiply a million times and filling my office with cooing fluff balls?" he asked, dropping his arms. "Nope. Healthy as can be."

"So why hasn't Jim woken up yet?"

"Could be a million different reasons, Spitfire," McCoy sighed, laying a comforting hand on her shoulder as he contemplated the sleeping man. "I had to synthesize a serum from super blood that we know little to nothing about. Yes, it brought back his brain activity, but you didn't see the level of radiation in his system. I'm not going to be surprised if he doesn't wake for a month."

Charlie frowned as she crossed her arms. She didn't know how bad Jim had been before the blood transfer. He was dead, she didn't need to know more than that, but now she wondered if her choice for ignorance was the right one.

The door opened, and both the doctor and Charlie turned as Spock entered the room. He dipped his head in acknowledgement to each of them and removed his hat.

"How is he, Doctor?" he asked.

"Unchanged," McCoy answered, shooting Charlie a sympathetic glance as she shook her head.

McCoy had begun to adjust Jim's nutrition intake, noticing the amount was far lower than it should have been when one of the readings spiked. He frowned, trying to adjust his tricorder as the reading steadily increased. "What the—?"

Suddenly a loud blaring echoed around the room, the graphs showing Jim's heart rate, brain activity, and other vitals spiked. Then without a word or provocation, Jim's eyes snapped opened as he inhaled a giant gulp of air like waking from a nightmare. Charlie gasped as the wide panicked eyes searched the room before landing on herself and Doctor McCoy.

"Oh, don't be so melodramatic," McCoy admonished, winking at Charlie who had jumped up from her seat, her hands on his arms to stop the captain from panicking. "You were barely dead."

"Mostly dead, Doc," Charlie corrected, her own heart beating wildly with a smile tugging at her lips. He was staring at her, _seeing_ her for the first time in weeks. If he had asked it of her in that moment, she could have flown from the sheer joy that he was awake. "I think the term is mostly dead, and I swear to god, if you ever scare me like that again, I will bring you back to life so I can kill you myself."

"Hey!" McCoy growled. "No threatening my patient when he just woke up!"

Jim grinned as his bright eyes shined. "Bones, it's okay," he placated, his voice a little rough as Charlie sat on the edge of his bed. "I deserve it. What happened?"

"You do what you always do," Charlie answered with a wet smile, tears of happiness clouding her vision. "Turn death into a fighting chance to live."

"It was the transfusion that really took its toll," McCoy added. "You were out cold for two weeks."

"Transfusion?"

"Your cells were heavily irradiated," the doctor explained. "We had no choice."

Jim glanced between Charlie and McCoy, his brows low over his eyes as he tried to understand the last few weeks. "Khan?"

She sobered as she nodded once in affirmation.

"Once we caught him, I synthesized a serum from his super blood," McCoy clarified. "Tell me, are you feeling uh . . . homicidal, power-mad, despotic?"

"Len!" Charlie barked, glaring at the physician.

"No more than usual," Jim smirked as his eyes traveled between the pair. "How'd you catch him?"

"I didn't."

Both McCoy and Charlie glanced over their shoulders at the silent man lurking in the back. Spock stepped forward, his hat tucked under his arm, having just come from other meeting with the top leaders regarding the ship and her captain.

"You saved my life," Jim stated, warmth in his gaze as he regarded his First Officer.

"Charlie, Uhura, and I had something to do with it, you know," McCoy grumbled.

"You saved my life, Captain," Spock answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And the lives of many oth—"

"Spock," Jim interrupted. "Just . . . thank you."

He paused a moment, and if she focused hard enough, Charlie swore there was a smile on the Vulcan's lips. "You are welcome, Jim."

The captain's grin widened as his attention moved from one person to the next. Charlie knew he didn't understand yet what they went through, the pain and turmoil when they thought he was dead. But he did know how grateful they all were to him. He had saved them and in return, they brought him back from his own sacrifice.

What awaited them in the next few weeks, only time could tell, but as Jim chatted with Spock and McCoy, she ran her eyes up and down his frame, unable to believe the animated man in front of her had walked through Death's opened door. The pallor that had been prominent was gone, replaced by rose tuned skin as the lines of worry around his eyes eased to ones of happiness. Jim was back in her life, and as his cerulean gaze matched her amber one, the spark of fire that raced in her veins returned like a phoenix from the ashes. One look sent her blood on fire, and when his pupils dilated and his fist clenched next to her hands, she knew his had as well.

Spock left soon after, letting the captain know that repairs had begun on his ship and that the First Officer and Chief Engineer were hard at work. McCoy too left soon after with the excuse that he needed to go prepare a battery of tests now that Jim was finally awake. He stressed there were long roads of recovery ahead, but McCoy's eyes betrayed his relief as they glimmered with the happiness they all shared. Jim was alive.

The door hissed shut behind the doctor, leaving Charlie and Jim alone. For a few moments, they could only stare at each other. Charlie's voice caught in her throat and she had to pinch herself to verify she hadn't been dreaming.

"Hey," he said with a hint of guilt in his gaze after the tenseness grew and became palpable.

"Hey yourself," she answered, reaching forward to take his large hand in her small one, her finger wrapping around tightly.

"So you helped Spock?"

"You bet your ass I did," she asserted. "I couldn't—I couldn't let you go if there was a chance to save you. You know how stubborn I can be."

"Boy do I," he smirked squeezing back. "Did you give Spock any grief?"

"What do you mean by grief?" she played off innocently.

Jim raised a brow as he shifted. "Ignoring orders, taking charge, and over all being the genius strategist you are and making sure we know it too."

"That may ring a bell," she grinned. "But he did threaten me with the space version of walking the plank and I took that threat seriously."

Jim laughed. "Pushed him that far? Well, I've been there, done that, and bought the T-shirt. It wasn't a very good T-shirt."

"Heard it was a very, uh, _cold_ T-shirt," Charlie grinned cheekily.

"I don't think there's a work in our language to describe how cold it was," he said with a pronounced shiver.

Charlie laughed, gripping his warm hand in her own, her eyes softening the longer she stared at him. He was awake and alive and everything was right in the world.

"I can't believe you're awake," she whispered. "It seemed like you would."

"It doesn't feel like two weeks," he sighed frowning, his eyes unfocused as he disappeared within.

"It feels longer for me," she mumbled, her eyes dropping to their joined hands, hands that now gripped each other's.

Jim reached out and with a finger lifted her chin. "Did you even go home?"

She shrugged, shifting in her chair. "Once or twice. I couldn't . . . that is I didn't want to leave and have something happen. I wanted to be here when you woke up."

He squeezed her hand as the guilt came back, his browns wrinkling as a muscle twitched in his clenched jaw. "I'm sorry this happened. I didn't want—"

"Jim, it's fine," she interrupted, her heart rate increasing. "So, I met with Admiral Barnett while you were, uh, out," she added, directing the topic away. "I've been accepted into the Academy."

"Academy?" Jim gasped, sitting up further with a wince as he adjusted himself. "Starfleet?"

She smiled as she nodded. "Command School."

"Charlie that's, that's amazing!" Jim exclaimed, his grip on her hand mirroring on painful. Although he appeared surprised, there was something that glimmered in his gaze, something she couldn't identify.

"It's come as a bit of a shock to me. Barnett pretty much said if I didn't enlist I was going to be drafted."

Jim laughed as he shook his head. "Pike said something similar to me once too."

They both sobered at the mention of their deceased mentor, each replying their last moments with the man and each full of heartache.

"You know what kept me going?" Jim finally said after minutes of silence.

Charlie snapped her gaze to his, swallowing the lump rising in her throat. "Jim, we don't have to talk about—"

"I want to," he interrupted, his voice hard and firm although he softened the longer he stared at her. He almost looked as if he was battling himself against something only he knew. "You know what kept me going? What made hit the core over and over until it realigned?"

Charlie paused, seeing his conviction. "The crew? The ship?"

"And you," Jim added to Charlie's astonishment. "All I could think about was that if I didn't succeed, if I didn't get the ship back to power you would die. I had to protect my crew, but I needed to protect you, Charlie. Without you, this ship is just an empty hull to me."

"I don't know what to say," she said after a pause, his admission so far from the Captain Kirk she knew about who was more in love with his ship than any woman. But if there was one thing she learned, the universe she was in was unlike any she had ever known.

"Marry me."

She blinked, staring at Jim as if he had grown a second head. In fact, she was pretty sure he had.

"What?" she gasped, jumping up from her chair.

Jim seemed equally as stunned, as if the thought hadn't even crossed his mind before he spoke it aloud. But if there was one thing Jim did, it was run with conviction. "You heard me. Marry me. Then you can come back to the ship and I wouldn't have to—"

"No."

It was his turn to look shocked. "Wait, what?"

"Jim, I love you," Charlie began, shoving her irrational fear aside. "Never forget that I love you more than anything else in this universe, but you just went through a traumatic event, and while I understand dying puts things in perspective, you're not thinking straight. We're just kids, we barely know each other. We haven't even been together for a year."

"Weren't you the one that loves those ancient princess things."

Charlie rolled her eyes. Of all the things to throw in her face, he had to pull _that_ one out of the hat. "Yes, I do love my Disney princesses, but they're just stories. This is real life. And while I don't think we're anywhere close to ending ours, we're not to that chapter yet."

"You're right, you're right," he placated, falling back against his pillow as he closed his eyes in defeat. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"You were thinking you don't want to lose me," she smiled, sitting on the edge of the bed as she took his hand. His eyes snapped open as he squeezed in response, the feeling sending a welcome jolt up her arm. "Death has a way of changing us. You're not going to lose me just like I know you won't leave me again, but give it some time. I would love nothing more than to marry you, Jim Kirk. But not right now. Right now, you need to heal, to get your ship sorted out and your crew back to full capacity. There'll be time enough for talks of marriage later. Much, much later."

"Think you can handle me, even when I'm an idiot?"

"Pretty sure I do that already," she teased.

"Hey!" he rebuked, his eyes narrowing but a grin pulling at his lips. "I just survived a near death experience, show a little love."

She softened as she scooted down to lay next to him, her head resting on his chest as she absorbed the pounding of his very much alive heart. His arms wrapped around her, and while she could feel the diminished strength in his limbs, it was still comforting.

"I love you, Jim Kirk," she mumbled into his shirt. "I love you more than my universe or yours. Please don't ever leave me like that again."

There was a pause as the arms squeezed harder and she felt lips brush across the top of her head. "I promise."


End file.
